by Shona Husk
Maybe.
Was it too soon? Would Anisa be ready? Would she come? Could I leave her if I had to? If I stayed, I knew I might not get another chance before the Lawman decided I wasn’t worth the risk.
Jawbreaker crossed his arms and looked as impassive as ever. “I reckon smart folk’ll stay home tonight.”
I laughed at how green he was, though not mocking him. I’d been like that once. “No, something like this brings them out in droves. They’ll have energy to burn. A few will try their luck here but most know they don’t have the coin.”
“You’re expecting trouble?”
“On a night like tonight? Without doubt.” The only question would be what form it took. A rowdy drunk we could handle. The Lawman hearing of my plan to leave would be fatal—for me.
With the doors open for trade, sure enough, the regulars came, plus the odd well-to-do walk-in. Sometimes we got a man who’d saved his coin for months for something special. Tonight was the night to spend, apparently, and business hummed. The house felt good—everyone was here for the same thing, a way to let off steam and have a good time. Jawbreaker turned away most of the trouble. Korene sent off a couple more on the pretext there was no one available. If they sought to argue, I soothed them and urged them to look down Brewer’s Lane.
But I still exuded calmness to counteract the fight in the air, mostly as a precaution. I could do more than just make people cry out with pleasure; I could affect their mood much more subtly—again, a skill learned out of necessity. But I didn’t like doing it. Magic on such a large scale was tiring, and the risk of getting caught was higher. That and I was sure the people walking into my lust house wouldn’t like me interfering with their mood any more than I liked them invading my thoughts.
I busied myself setting up a tryst for a married couple looking for something more adventurous. They wanted a three-way to see if she could get pregnant with a different man. The desire they had was simple enough. Not that they’d told me about their plans for a baby…that had been Korene, who always knew the real reason people visited. But I had sensed their nervousness and the interest about how it would work. All things I could explain. However, they had requested me, not Noromon, and I couldn’t tell them I wasn’t the man for the job. A part of me wanted to tell, though; if they desired a baby that badly they deserved a fair shot.
Our conversation fell silent when what sounded like a brawl started on my doorstep. The couple looked at each other like frightened silk-ears about to get caught out. I smiled and excused myself. Then cursed under my breath as I walked toward the front.
“Haidyn,” Korene called.
I ran the rest of the way.
Jawbreaker had a sweaty man in an arm lock. The sweaty man was fighting back.
“You’ll pay for this. All of you.” The Lawman was red-faced and furious.
Several choice curses about the law and a raxen’s asshole sprang to mind but I bit my tongue and found a shred of politeness. “What a surprise to see you.” I forced a smile and calm thoughts to try and bottle up my own rage at the bastard and his treatment of Anisa. I was also hoping to take the edge off his anger, softly, so he didn’t notice it fading. “This isn’t your night.”
Brixen stopped struggling. I nodded to Jawbreaker to let the Lawman go. Since he wasn’t here in whites, this wasn’t an official visit. He was here to fuck me, not arrest me. My gut turned, but it was better he was with me than with Anisa.
The Lawman straightened his clothing, pale yellow shirt and dark blue trousers, then—
“No!” Korene’s warning was too late.
Brixen’s fist connected with my cheek. I stumbled back, shock jarring my bones while my skin smarted. Jawbreaker wrestled with Brixen. I rubbed my cheek. My fingers came away red. Blood. The skin was split. My hands curled, but I forced them to straighten. If I swung at him with this many witnesses, I’d join the assumed Rogues in the morning.
“I make the rules. Not you, Master Whore.”
“I’ll toss him out. He reeks like sour wine.” Jawbreaker edged toward the door and I wondered if he realized who he held. Maybe not without his whites.
“No. He’s a regular who’s out of step.” And out of line. “I’ll take him out back to bathe while I make room in our schedule.” I gave Brixen a very pointed look. He couldn’t come in and make demands. We had other people who came here, and Brixen wasn’t our most valuable client, but he was the one with the most clout. And he wasn’t afraid to use it.
“You’ll pay for the rough handling,” Brixen snarled.
I was sure I would. No doubt his desires tonight would be more violent than usual.
“My thug was told to be careful, as there seems to be a lot of unrest.” I kept my voice smooth and even, my magic concentrated on Brixen. His mind was familiar enough to me, but I’d never gotten used to the sticky darkness that clung to every thought. Most people weren’t like that. Most folk had light and dark and shades of grey. They had all the colorful emotions I expected to find and had to use to give them what they desired. Not Brixen.
“The whole town is celebrating.” He grabbed his crotch and leered at me. “I’ve a mind to do the same.”
Oh, joy. I’d have much preferred to toy with the fantasies of the married couple. Instead, Brixen sought to flex his power over me and prove what a man he was. My throat closed as my stomach rolled. He couldn’t come round here whenever he felt like it and make demands. On the other hand, if I sent him home without getting what he wanted, Anisa would be in trouble. Better he was in my bed.
“We’re very busy tonight, but I’m sure I can make some arrangement.” I held out my hand, indicating for him to come through.
Korene mouthed, “Are you insane?”
“Yes,” I mouthed back. It was that or dead, and I was choosing the former.
“Come and wash and give me a few moments,” I told him. He was sweaty and drunk. And no one wants that in bed, even if being paid.
His lips flapped like a fish gasping air, and I smothered his aggression with thoughts of flesh, as if he were eyeing up what he’d be getting once he got upstairs. It seemed to work, but what I’d rather be doing was smothering him with a blanket or holding his head underwater.
Killing a Lawman was a sure way to end up with every militia man hunting my ass. I forced a breath between my teeth, my hopes for a pleasant evening dashed. I left Brixen bathing and then went back to the couple. They were happy to make a booking for a quieter night, when I could give them extra time. They almost seemed relieved not to be going through with it tonight. I watched them leave, knowing they had the one thing I never thought I’d have—unwavering love. I closed my eyes and let thoughts of Anisa warm me.
Our meeting remained a secret and she hadn’t betrayed me. The love I’d seen in her eyes had been real, not an act. That was all I needed to know that we could get through this and have a second chance.
I dawdled on my way back to Brixen, partly because I was feeling put out enough to make him wait and partly because I knew what was coming. Somehow the branding had been less painful; it had certainly been less invasive. When I went into my room, Brixen was drying off. He seemed calmer, but there was still a hideous curl on his lip, his gaze lingering on the cut on my cheek like he was proud of his handiwork.
I needed to take more pride in my work.
He didn’t wait for me to undress, just shoved me to my knees, his cock in hand. I went gently but instead of taking his flesh, I grasped his mind. Some people are bad, rotten all the way through. At least he was consistent and predictable, and that made his mind easy to manipulate. While he thought I was choking on his shaft I dug into his thoughts, deeper than I ever had before and ever wanted to go. Deeper than his fear of being found out with me, which was just the surface. I was looking for something I could use against him, something secret and strong.
He wanted to be the roughest, toughest Lawman remembered for decades for bringing Reseda to heel. He wanted control.
In his mind he forced me to the floor and rode me hard. I bit my cheek to keep from laughing at the sight of him thrusting into his own hand in ecstasy. The thought of tomorrow’s hanging excited him. The sick bastard.
But in the murk I found what I needed. I found his biggest failure, the moment when he’d lost control and people’s respect had slipped. The death of his first wife. No one liked a man who tried to prove how tough he was by hitting a woman. Most were dealt with by the woman’s relatives. But both of the Lawman’s wives had been far from home.
His first wife had taken her life. I saw the truth in his mind, but she’d done it in such a way that the question would always be there, right next to the bruises—had he pushed her?
To me it didn’t matter. It was the fear of losing another wife that I could use to turn his thoughts against him. I drew back, letting a wave of pleasure break over him—one he couldn’t resist. I was tired of the show and wanted him gone.
Brixen bucked and groaned and finished, staining my carpet in the process. Ugh.
I sat on the floor, leaning against the bed, pretending to pant. Brixen would think twice before laying a hand on another by the time I was done with him. Tonight I wanted him well away from Anisa, so I pushed the suggestion he should go out and get drunk, really drunk. I needed to see how far I could push his mind.
He got up, looked confused for a moment then sneered. “Next time I show up, you’d best be more accommodating.”
I lowered my eyes as if chastened, not wanting him seeing the rebellion in my gaze. I was going to break him the way he’d broken his first wife. The way he wanted to break Anisa. He would bend to my will.
He would feel his worst fears unfold and have the town look at him with scorn. He would never come near my lust house again.
“I need a drink.” He pulled up his trousers as if he couldn’t get out fast enough, the fabric sticking to his sweaty skin.
The thought had taken hold. I could feel his need to get drunk wiping out all other thoughts. Good. I gave him one last parting gift—that he would feel a burning every time he peed. How long that suggestion would last, I didn’t know, but he wouldn’t mention where he’d gotten it and no herbalist would be able to treat the phantom illness. I kept my head down so he wouldn’t see me smiling.
The Lawman flung open the door and left, making sure to close it after him so no one accidentally saw who he’d been with.
I sighed and let the tension ease. Then I realized what I’d done. It was one thing to give people what they desired, or make subtle suggestions to reinforce my words, but another to change their mind to suit my will.
The Arcane Union would love to get their hands on my skill, and so would the FAA. I’d be able to make people believe whatever propaganda they sprouted. The thought chilled me more than the Lawman’s unscheduled visit. I wasn’t safe and I couldn’t shut it off, only dull it with liquor. The only time I ever had peace was with Anisa. Around her I was simply a man, the one thing I’d never wanted to be. Now I craved the simplicity that would bring. There would be no more meddling with people’s minds after this.
I pulled myself up onto the edge of the bed, head in my hands, nails against my scalp. As much as I hated him and what he did, I didn’t know if I could actually hurt someone with magic.
It was easy to plot and imagine. Much harder to enact. If I went through that door, would I be able to come back? Who would that make me? Maybe he’d drink himself to death tonight. That would be kinder for both of us.
There was a knock on the door a moment before it swung open. I lifted my gaze to see Korene in the doorway.
“I saw him leave. I came to make sure…”
Make sure I wasn’t dead or injured. She didn’t need to say it.
“I’m fine.” As fine as I would be while still within reach of the Lawman.
“You don’t look it.”
I didn’t feel it either. “Promise me that whatever happens tomorrow you’ll look after this place and forget me.”
She paled. “What are you going to do?”
“Can’t say. I’ve left papers with Master Cog at the Arcane Union. I trust him more than Brixen.”
Korene nodded but her eyes were wide. She didn’t trust the Union. They’d put her on the wheel if they knew she was Arcane.
“Cog wants info on Rudley’s boys. I’ve sent word for them to avoid the place for a bit. Cog is watching. And I’ll make sure Brixen won’t be back.”
“You’re not going to kill him. You can’t do that.”
I ran my tongue over my lower lip. What I was going to do was worse. I’d take everything he lived for and strip him down to a tiny, powerless maggot. And if I failed, there’d be an eleventh hanging. “You have my word I won’t kill him. I won’t be back, either.” No matter what happened, I wasn’t coming back. I stood. “Do you need me downstairs?”
“No. Not with your face like that.” She didn’t speak harshly, just stated the truth.
I touched my cheek, felt the cut and tender skin. Bruises weren’t good for business. I knew that and didn’t argue. The Red Lust House was hers now.
“I’ll pack.” That was it. The decision was made. I had to make my move tonight and pray the Lords had my back. Somehow I felt lighter, as if just taking that first step was enough to set my mind at ease.
“Haidyn…” Her dark eyes glistened; she didn’t want me to leave.
We’d worked together for too long. Making friends in this business was hard, trusting people even harder. We’d had something good. Been good for each other, needed each other for a time. But that was over. I couldn’t drag her down with me.
“If I stay, you are all in danger.”
She gave a slow blink, and I knew she was reading me the way educated folk read books. “Do you need anything?”
“The buggy. I have coin.” We all drew a wage, the rest of the coin stayed in the business and while I was entitled to strip what was left after paying the Arcane healer, I couldn’t do that to Korene and the others. So all I had was my own wages. Which wasn’t nearly enough for starting a new life but it would have to do.
“Be careful.”
Outside, glass shattered and lightning streaked past the window. I nodded. As careful as I could be. Then she hugged me. For a moment I was so shocked I didn’t move. Her fear and worry about my life and hers and the future of Reseda became mine for a moment. Then I was able to separate my mind from hers, simply because I knew her so well. After a heartbeat I returned the embrace.
Korene and I hardly touched. It was too personal, and we liked our own space after giving so much to others. I was going to miss her. I was going to miss the lust house. I’d put so much of myself into building the place and giving it the reputation it deserved. Brixen might have branded us, but he hadn’t scared off the clientele. The Red Lust House would go on.
She drew back and released me. “I can’t imagine the house without you.”
“You’ll be fine. You own the best lust house in Reseda.” I forced a grin to reassure her, even though she’d know I was pretending. Maybe I was trying to force myself to believe I’d be all right, but it felt like I was putting my life, and Anisa’s life, in the hands of Lords. However, this was what I’d always prayed for, the trade I’d promised to make. I had to give it all up to have my second chance. “I’ll be gone before dawn.”
I cast my gaze over the room for the last time. I’d thought leaving would easy, but nine days out of ten weren’t so bad. Most folk had simple pleasures and were easy to please. I was no different. I didn’t need the silks and fine drink I’d become accustomed to. With Anisa I’d have everything I’d ever wanted.
Upstairs I carefully pulled her note out from beneath my pillow. I reread it, glad I had ignored it, then folded it up and tucked it into my trousers. There wasn’t a lot else to pack. My room was simple, sparse compared to the rest of the house. I left my fancy clothes of silks and soft wools and took plain shirts and trousers. Then I dressed and put on
my purple coat. It was still well made and costly, but not as obvious as my favorite red coat. I fingered the fabric of the red one. It had cost me a full gold coin to buy and was the sign I’d made it, no longer limping from day to day paying staff and bills and using my wage to cover the gap—they never knew that, but the first year the Red Lust House was open it almost closed. I feared I’d overreached…was I overreaching again?
I couldn’t let the thoughts take hold. I let my hand fall away. I had to leave the coat behind. I was no longer that man. I tied my clothes into a bundle then went downstairs and tossed the lot into the buggy, double-checking there was a sufficient length of rope in the back. I knew I wouldn’t be able to sleep for the last hour until dawn, and I couldn’t go through maudlin goodbyes. So I left. I took the back lanes and parked at a resting establishment not too far from the Lawman’s house. I paid the sleepy boy to watch it and made like I was going to get a room. Instead I walked out onto the streets.
My heart pounded, driven hard by tension brewing in the air. The shards of glass on the cobbles sparkled in the starlight, blood staining them dark. My steps crunched, but there was no one to hear. The crowd had moved on even though the tension lingered.
Close to the Decihall, people were already jostling for position and the best view of the frames. They were mostly drunkards and thieves, but the regular folk wouldn’t be far behind. By the time dawn colored the sky the area would be filled up. I took up a spot against the wall in shadows and waited. I said a prayer for the man who’d built the frames. My father had only been called on once to make a gallows. A bad business, taking coin from the dead, he’d say.
Then I said a prayer for me. I hoped the Carpenter would forgive me for not following in my father’s trade, that the Arcane would forgive my use of his magic, that the Brewer would release me and the Warrior would lend me his courage to see this through. My fingers flexed, as if reaching for the Lawman already. I knew what I had to do, and even though I hated him and what he did it made it no easier. I asked the Smith for strength. The Miner to not fear the darkness in my heart. I asked the Farmer for a chance to walk in the sun and the Stonemason for a new home, the Weaver for a new life. And finally the Hunter. I prayed the Hunter would take me as his humble servant if I lived.