Body and Soul

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Body and Soul Page 17

by Lucy Lennox


  I nodded and took his hand before walking over to kiss my baby goodnight. “Be a good girl and don’t do anything I wouldn’t… well, fuck. Just be a good girl, okay?”

  The room erupted again, and I shot everyone the bird over my shoulder before leading Jake toward our room.

  I didn’t spare a single other thought for whatever-his-name-was with the charming smile and red hair.

  Chapter 18

  Jake

  The next two weeks flew by. Oz seemed to spend more time in town than on his fashion collection, but it didn’t seem to be bothering him. He flitted between the clinic lobby project, the pageant costume project he’d volunteered for, and the latest commitment he’d been roped into, which was helping consult on the decorations for the town’s big Winter Carnival.

  He was a ball of energy. The man was friendly to the people of Haven and happily chatted everyone’s ears off while he worked side by side with them on one of his projects. Once word got out in our small town that he and I were dating, or whatever it was we were doing, people would make a point of stopping me to tell me how wonderful he was.

  I hadn’t been in the hardware store for five minutes before one of Oz’s latest admirers stopped me to rave over my guy. “Oh, Jake! There you are,” Mrs. Inman said as she waved her hand like she’d been specifically searching for me. “I just wanted to say that boyfriend of yours is the sweetest thing ever. My granddaughter, Mina, is in the pageant, and Oz has been an absolute dear helping her find something to wear that can disguise her crutches. You remember she injured her ankle during the basketball game a couple of weeks ago, right?”

  Before I had a chance to respond, she continued.

  “Well, she has that awful cast and crutches, but that dear Oz designed a faux fur cape that is to die for! And damned if the thing doesn’t cover up her crutches and make her look like royalty. He’s a keeper, that one.”

  I nodded. When I realized she was waiting for me to say something, I did.

  “I can’t argue with you there,” I said politely, even though my heart squeezed painfully at the reminder that even though the man was definitely a keeper, I wasn’t the one who’d have the privilege of keeping him.

  “Tell him I said hello, will you?” she called out as she made her way past me to the paint aisle.

  “Sure thing. Thank you, Mrs. Inman. Remind Mr. Inman to come by the clinic for a blood pressure check, will you please?”

  After the hardware store, I stopped in at Russ’s furniture workshop to ask him a favor. It galled me to have to ask him for help, but he was the only person I knew who could do what I needed done.

  As soon as I walked in, his face lit up. “Hey there, Jake. How’s it going?”

  Before I could say anything, Russ barreled on. “Hey, I keep meaning to ask you something. Are you and Oz still seeing each other? I mean, if it’s just a casual thing, I’d really love to get his phone number. I asked Bennett and Xander, but they told me to ask you. I’ve been so busy catching up on orders, I haven’t had a chance to come up the mountain and knock on his door.”

  I opened my mouth to tell him not only no, but hell no, when I suddenly realized I had no right to say that. The reality was that Oz and I weren’t exclusive. Maybe in addition to our mutual agreement that what we had was temporary, Oz would want to play the field a bit while he was here. I mean, it wasn’t like we could have an exclusive relationship if there was no future in it, right?

  “Uh… ah…” I scrambled my brain for a way to have it both ways–to let Oz make his own damned decisions, but make sure one of them wasn’t going out on a date with Russ.

  No such luck.

  “Sure,” I said as dread curled in my belly, making it twist painfully. “Let me just ask him first.”

  Russ’s eyes lit up with excitement. “That’d be great. Thanks, man. Now, what can I help you with? I assume you’re here for a reason.”

  I explained what I had in mind and got out of there as quickly as I could.

  Late in the day when I finally made my way to the clinic to help update some patient notes for Doc Sharma, I ran into Oz putting some finishing touches on a mural he’d created in the kids’ area of the waiting room. We’d both spent the previous Saturday and Sunday nights painting the walls while the clinic was closed to patients. Now that the paint had had plenty of time to dry, Oz was finally able to use the colorful decals he’d found online to create the cartoon woodland scene he’d come up with.

  “That looks fantastic, Oz,” I said as I entered the clinic and shucked off my coat. “Even better than you described it. The kids are going to love it.”

  He turned to me and brightened as soon as he saw me, which made my heart thump. After putting down the tool he’d been using, he hopped over the small barricade he’d erected to keep the kids out of the area while he worked and made his way over to me. I slid my arms around his waist and leaned in for a quick kiss.

  “I didn’t mean to interrupt,” I murmured against his soft lips. “But now that you’re here…” I tightened my arms around him as if I wasn’t about to let him go.

  “Missed your face,” Oz admitted softly into my ear. “You were gone before I woke up this morning.”

  I pulled back and looked at him, recognizing the hint of insecurity in his expression.

  “I had to go check those rental properties I manage on the other side of the mountain. Didn’t want to wake you. I’m sorry, I should have thought to leave you a note or send you a text.” I brushed a quick kiss over his mouth before saying, “Let me take you out for dinner when we’re done here. I just need to finish up some paperwork. Shouldn’t take more than a half hour or so. What do you say?”

  His face brightened again. “Like a date? You mean, with clothes and everything?”

  I felt my face heat. We’d spent the better part of the past two weeks naked or nearly naked in one or the other of our cabins. Usually we were in his cabin, since it was more homey and comfortable and because all of Boo’s stuff was there, not to mention it was more convenient for him to be near his sewing machine and dressmaking supplies. There had been several nights I’d woken up in the middle of the night and found the other side of the bed empty, only to discover him hard at work in the main room with his fabric and designs.

  “Not like a date, an actual date. We can even go see a movie afterward if you’d like,” I said before brushing his hair back from where a small lock had fallen in his face. It had grown out a bit since he’d cut it, and I liked having more to sink my hands into when we were in bed together.

  “Mm, not sure about the movie. As much as I’d like a date, I kind of prefer naked movie time at home,” he teased.

  We’d been curled up on the sofa a few nights before watching a movie at his place when I’d begun undressing him. He’d made a comment about how that had become our norm during movie time. I’d poked my head up from under the blanket after peeling off his pants and grinned at him. “If you could just show up naked for movie time from now on, that would make it a lot easier on me,” I’d said in response.

  I looked around the clinic waiting room to make sure no one could hear us. The final patients of the day had already been called back to an exam room, so we were alone.

  “I’m never going to complain about naked movie time, sweetheart,” I said, leaning in to sip from his lips again. I would never get tired of kissing Ozias Ballard. He was sensual, responsive, expressive, and so very sweet. Every time we kissed, he seemed to melt against me in a way that made me feel completely trusted and adored. It was something I tried not to think too much about, because then I’d become obsessed with reminding myself that it wasn’t going to last.

  “Ok,” I said, forcing myself to step back. “You finish your mural and I’ll go work on those charts. Meet back here in thirty minutes with ideas about where you want to eat tonight, okay?”

  He nodded. “Sounds like a plan.”

  Before I passed the reception counter to head to the back, I remembere
d something. “Oh. I saw Russ earlier. The guy wants your number. I told him I’d ask you first to make sure it was alright with you.”

  I tried my hardest to act like it was no big deal when really, it was killing me. There was a beat of silence as Oz blinked at me.

  “Um…?” he said, raising an eyebrow at me. I could tell he wanted to know what I thought–maybe have me ask him to shoot the guy down. But I forced myself to remain silent. As much as I wanted Oz to be only mine for the next eight weeks, I didn’t have the right to ask that of him. It would just bind us closer together, and that would only make it harder to leave when the time came. Maybe if there’d been the option of a long-distance relationship or something… no, I needed to make it a clean break when the time came. Keeping it casual was a necessary evil to making it easier for both of us to walk away.

  When I didn’t say anything, Oz dropped his eyes and toyed with the decal in his hand. “Um, okay, fine… I guess.”

  I told myself I should respond in some fashion, but there wasn’t enough oxygen in my lungs, so I merely turned around to walk back to Doc Sharma’s office, leaving my crushed heart in the patient waiting room. At least the red would match the god-awful furniture.

  Chapter 19

  Oz

  I watched Jake’s stiff frame disappear into the back of the clinic and felt my heart stutter in my chest. I knew exactly what he was thinking. He was trying to keep his distance from me–keep me at arm’s length for my own good. Over the past couple of weeks, I’d seen many instances of that kind of behavior from him.

  Once, when I’d shared my excitement with him at being selected for the main show at Fashion Week rather than the indie one, he’d gone overboard apologizing for not being able to be there to support me in person. I’d wanted to shake him and remind him that I hadn’t invited him, that I was trying my fucking hardest to respect his stupid, mysterious bullshit. But I’d bitten my tongue instead and just let his apologies peter out.

  Another time, he’d mentioned that I could move into his cabin if I decided to come back to Haven after the show in New York.

  “If Xander and Bennett sell or rent theirs to someone else, you can come here,” he’d said while we’d been having breakfast at his place one morning. Jake had made sure to keep from meeting my eyes as he’d spoken, and I’d been able to tell the subject bothered him.

  I’d been so upset at the reminder that what we had came with a looming deadline that I’d momentarily reverted to my snarky nothing-can-touch-me attitude. “I’ll be fine,” I’d said. “I can look out for myself, you know. And I’m sure Xander and Bennett would help me find another place if I ever needed it.”

  Fortunately, Jake hadn’t called me out on my behavior. He’d merely said, “I just know how much you like it here, and I’d hate to think you wouldn’t come back here because…” At that point, his voice had dropped off and the unspoken words of because I’m not here lay heavy in the room.

  “I’d come back,” I’d said quietly, almost under my breath.

  It was something I’d started to spend more and more time thinking about, actually. I’d thought about how much I loved the slower pace of life in Haven, how I adored the cold, crisp air and the dark, silent nights on the mountain. I enjoyed people beginning to recognize me in town and wave to me from across the street as I passed them. Of all the people I’d met, not one had seemed to recognize even a hint of Laird in me.

  And I loved that almost as much as all the time I’d spent with Jake.

  To Haven, I was just Oz.

  To Jake, I was Oz and more.

  But the Russ thing was different. It wasn’t about Russ at all. It was about Jake reminding me that what we were doing was having some fun, both in and out of bed, before we went our separate ways. And apparently, he seemed to think the only way I’d get that message was for me to see and fuck another guy at the same time. The very thought of it made me want to scream and throw things, have an actual hissy fit to put all other tantrums to shame. If anyone in the fashion world had ever seen Laird act entitled, they hadn’t seen anything compared to how I felt about Jake giving me unspoken permission to be with some other guy. And if he even thought about seeing someone else…

  Nope.

  No fucking way.

  It was bad enough that what we had came with an expiration date–there was no way in hell I was adding in the complication of seeing other people into the mix. My brain just couldn’t wrap itself around that.

  I’d spent the better part of the last two weeks scrambling for an idea that would work to keep Jake from leaving, or at least considering coming to New York, if he was insistent on not staying in Haven for whatever reason. I’d thought maybe the lure of us having another few months together would buy me the time I needed to make him see that maybe we could make this thing work long-term. But I was a realist, and I knew Jake would be a tough nut to crack. And without even really understanding what it was Jake was running from, I was sorely outmatched when it came to that particular argument.

  I’d tried a few times to get him to open up about his family and the events that had led to him walking away from his life as a doctor but hadn’t been successful. The only hint I’d gotten that it continued to hurt him deeply was when I’d inadvertently walked up behind him one morning while he’d been working on his laptop at the kitchen table. He’d been scrolling through a Facebook profile showing several pictures of an older couple. The man had looked a lot like Jake. When Boo had alerted Jake to my presence by jumping up from her spot on the couch to come greet me, Jake had quickly closed the laptop and then dashed at his eyes, though I’d only seen the move from behind. When he’d turned to greet me, he’d been all smiles.

  Fake smiles.

  I hadn’t had the guts to ask him about the pictures.

  While I finished putting up the decals on the clinic wall, I tried to remind myself that I still had some time to figure things out with Jake. But I found that my anger wouldn’t just die a simple death like I wanted it to. My hands shook as I tried to place the last couple of decals, but when I couldn’t get them in exactly the spot I wanted, I gave up and dropped them on the table.

  “Fuck this,” I muttered. I might not have any kind of say in this relationship living past the expiration date Jake had set, but hell if I was going to spend the next two months pretending it was less than it was.

  I stomped over the barrier closing off the play area and stormed down the hall to the small office Jake and Doc Sharma used to do paperwork. I practically threw the door open. Jake was in the process of putting his coat on.

  “Hey, I was just coming up to get you for—”

  I cut him off with a hard kiss that had him hitting the wall behind him. He let out a little whoosh of air as I practically assaulted him and then he was wrapping his arms around me. I forced myself to release him and stepped back.

  “Were you really going to do it?” I snapped.

  “Do what?” Jake asked, clearly confused.

  “Let Russ ask me out? Allow me to accept?”

  “Oz, I—”

  “Well, fuck that shit, Jake… Jake… fuck, I don’t even know your goddamned last name!” I barked.

  “It’s Prescott,” he supplied, his expression softening just a little.

  “Fine. Then fuck that shit, Jake Prescott!” I muttered, trying to recover some of my earlier fire, but my voice ended up cracking as my emotions took over. “You said we had until we both left town. But if that includes us fucking other guys, then you can forget it. Because you’re mine, Jake. Until the moment I get in my car and drive out of Haven for the last time, you’re fucking mine, and if you even think about touching another guy—”

  This time I was the one with an armful of angry man. Jake’s mouth slammed down on mine. I nearly forgot what we’d been talking about by the time he pulled back just a little. “No,” he bit out. “No one’s coming between us, Oz. Russ can go fuck himself, and I’m going to tell him that as soon as I see him again,�
� he growled.

  The relief washing over me made my knees weak. “So just us,” I said. “We’re exclusive.”

  “Yeah,” Jake murmured, then he kissed me again. I was pushing his coat off when he grabbed my wrists. “Date first, remember?”

  Part of me wanted to say fuck the date, but I really wanted the chance to see him in a new environment. One outside of Haven.

  I pulled in a deep breath to try and quell my raging desire. “You said I get to pick the spot, right?” I asked.

  Jake was watching me hungrily. I wasn’t surprised when his hands began roaming up and down my back. I had a feeling he was regretting his insistence on following through on the date first. “Yeah, your choice.”

  “We’re going to Denver,” I said with a big grin. “And we’re going to find a place to go dancing.”

  I was expecting Jake to balk, but he just smiled back at me and reached for my hand. “Whatever you want, beautiful.”

  The compliment made me shiver, because I knew what it really meant. There were so many times that Jake called me beautiful, but it was rarely about my physical appearance. In those moments after we made love and he was staring down at me and trying to catch his breath, he’d just hold my gaze and say something about what a beautiful, amazing person I was. There was nothing about my flawless skin or perfect lips or unique eyes–no, it was always about how kind I was, what a good heart I had, how I radiated goodness. His words always made something deep inside of me come to life, and for the first time in the eight years since I’d started modeling, I actually felt beautiful.

  We decided to go home to shower, change, and feed Boo before our big night out, so I quickly kissed Jake and made my way to the Jeep to follow his truck up the mountain. I mentally rifled through my wardrobe to figure out what I wanted to wear dancing in the city and was caught up in my thoughts when I parked the Jeep in front of the cabin. It wasn’t until I was getting out of the vehicle that I saw a person huddled on my front porch.

 

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