by Vivian Arend
What she should do next, that is. What she wanted to do? Lean forward until their bodies connected. Wrap her arms around him, hell, wrap her legs around him. For one night she wanted to let go of the emotion she’d locked down tight—for one night she would love to set it free. Just like the storm dumping everything it had in twenty-four hours, in one hour she could rid herself of so many things.
That’s when she realized they were touching. She’d shifted and brought them in contact, her breasts pressed against a wall of muscle.
His fingers shook against her skin. “Rachel, honey, you don’t want to do this.”
Oh, no, she really did. “Why not?”
His eyes flashed hotter, and the subtle change in his body stance proved her suggestion had made an impact.
“There’s only one bed,” she pointed out.
His lips twitched. “If you think I’m going to fuck you simply because there’s only one bed and we have to share it, you need to know I have a little more willpower than that.”
“Don’t you want me?”
Lee dragged in a deep breath as Rachel wished she could smack herself in the head for being so forward. And then she didn’t give a damn because this was what she wanted.
“No one is twisting my arm. No one is making me proposition you. I’ve been so cold inside,” she confessed, “and this is the first time in a long time I’ve felt anything. Anything other than pain.”
Lee shook his head. “You know I care about you, and giving Gary hell for what he did to you is high on my agenda, but—”
“But, what?” she demanded. “You think you’re in charge of what I want? Thanks, but I had someone try that with me, and it didn’t turn out so good.”
She tossed caution to the wind and slid her palms up his chest, feeling his hardness sink against her belly, and a flash of fire turned the pain inside to passion. She really didn’t want to miss a chance to erase some of what she’d felt at Gary’s betrayal.
“Rach—”
She didn’t let him finish, just pressed their lips together. If she had to be the aggressor, so be it.
Not three seconds after they made contact, she was no longer in charge. He’d lifted her in the air so he could kiss her better, that hand at the back of her head holding her exactly right so he could ravish her mouth. Teeth, tongue, lips. He used them all with devastating effectiveness as he kissed her, and kissed her, and kissed her some more until she was lightheaded and not caring one single bit.
When he pulled back, she paused, lingering in the moment between her need to gasp for air and the urgent desire to dive back in for another round. Time stood still as she stared into his face and tried to analyze what he felt.
Desire was there—that much was powerfully clear. He didn’t attempt to hide his sexual attraction.
Yet with a level of control far from how he’d kissed her, he placed her back on the ground, stepping away after she caught her balance. His eyes had gone dark, his breathing unsteady. “Make no mistake, Rachel, I want you. I’ve wanted you for a long time, and I don’t just mean in bed. But this isn’t how we’re going to start anything.”
Chapter Three
Caught between desire and a hard place—and this time he wasn’t being a smartass and making a joke about what being near Rachel did to his body.
She hesitated for a breath then narrowed her eyes, and he scrambled to fix things before it all went to hell.
“It’s not a case of me trying to decide what you should do.” Lee crossed his arms in front of his chest, all too aware he was putting a barrier between them, but he desperately needed one right now. “You know I like you. Hell, I like you a lot, and if things had been different, then you and I would be rocking that mattress and doing a snow dance in the hopes we ended up trapped with nothing to do but fuck around for the next week.”
As he spoke her eyes grew wider, a flush rising to her face and leaving perfect red circles on her high cheekbones.
“So why aren’t we?” she demanded. “Why are you standing way over there, and I’m over here when there’s only one bed, and you know I want you?”
“Because if you’d really wanted me, you would’ve had me last spring.”
Her expression changed in an instant, the flush growing brighter, no longer from arousal but embarrassment. Memories had to be reeling through her brain—no doubt she was flipping through all the times he’d asked her out and she’d not only turned him down, she’d as good as pretended he’d been joking.
He needed to make one thing clear. Lee spoke softly. “This isn’t about revenge, Rachel. I’m not punishing you because you didn’t take me seriously.”
“It sure feels like it.”
He shook his head. “My point is that’s what could’ve been, but we’re not looking back anymore. I’ve wanted you for a long time, but you made other choices—for good or bad. That’s why I’m not stripping you down and tossing you on the bed. That’s why, even though we’re going to share space under your sleeping bag so we can stay warm, I’m not going to stick my dick into you, no matter how much I want to, because it’s not the right thing to do right now.”
“God save me from stubborn men.” Rachel’s eyes flashed. “It’s not like you’re a rebound fuck or something.”
“Aren’t I?” He was walking a thin line, but no damn way would he let her use him one time to get Gary out of her system.
One time, and then be discarded? Hell, no.
“Rachel Ricardo, I want—”
“Malone,” she snapped. She repeated herself, calmer, but very insistently. “I’m not a Ricardo anymore, I’m a Malone.”
Good for her. “Rachel Malone, I want to go out with you. I want to do all those crazy things like pick you up, and open car doors for you, take you to the movies and go for long drives in the country.” He let his gaze drift over her. “I want to get to know every inch of your body while I get to know everything else about you. If that’s what you want too, it can start now, but it’s going to start properly.”
Their eyes were locked together. Rachel blinked hard, a slew of emotions flitting across her face. “So we’re not just going to jump into bed and go at it like bunny rabbits?”
Lee laughed, shaking his head. “No. I’m sorry, there will be no rabbit sex, or grizzly-bear sex, or wild sex of any kind in this cabin while we’re trapped here.” He caught her by the hand. Linking their fingers so he could entice warmth back into them. “I promise it’ll still be fun. A lot more fun than going off like a rocket.”
“Although that can be entertaining too,” she pointed out with a sigh.
“I’m pretty sure somewhere down the road we’ll have a few of those rocket days.” He let a smile break free. “Hell, we’ll have more than a few—I like explosive sex, Rachel. But I also like slow sex, and fooling around. I’ve daydreamed about surprising you at work. I’d steal you away into the back staffroom for a quickie, all the while being careful no one catches us. And I think about taking you home and spending hours getting you ready. Using my tongue and my fingers until you’ve had a half-dozen orgasms before we start for the night.”
“You talking like that isn’t making it any easier to forget about having sex.” Rachel breathed out the words, her tone gone sultry and soft.
His body was hard and aching, and there was a whole a lot of truth in what she’d said. “Doesn’t mean we shouldn’t wait.”
They stood there, their bodies in near mirror images, him leaning against the kitchen counter, her shoulders pressed to the back door where she’d retreated to after he’d let her go. Arms folded, legs stretched out in front.
“So?” She tilted her chin higher, a challenge move if he’d ever seen one.
Lee waited for the rest of the question.
Rachel raised a brow. “Well, for all your grand plans, and everything you just bragged about, you seem to have forgotten one vital bit of the discussion.”
Lee thought quickly, nodding when he figured it out. “You’re no
t going to let me get away with anything, are you?”
An amused smile ghosted across her lips.
He lifted himself off the counter and paced closer. He planted one hand on the door on either side of her head then stared down intently. “Rachel Malone, would you go out with me?”
A solid gap remained open between them, but they could’ve been in complete contact for how hot he was, especially when she teased him with another glimpse of that tongue before answering his question.
“Sure. Pick me up at eight.”
Lee laughed. He wanted to pull her into his arms again, but the last thing he needed was for her to know he was aching to have her there. Hiding his hard-on was vital.
It was late enough they should go to bed. The sooner this day was over, the better. He paced to the corner and checked the thickness of her sleeping bag, considering what he had in his backpack to wear.
Somehow they’d get through this.
Lee turned and caught her standing in front of the fire, hands once again stretched toward the heat. “Do you need to go out again tonight?”
She shook her head.
“Then why don’t you get ready for bed.” He pulled a small washbasin off the wall behind the stove and poured hot water from the kettle into it. “I’ll grab you some snow to cool that down when I head to the outhouse.”
He bundled up and slipped outside, passing back a bucket full of pristine white snow. Then he headed into the cold, the light from his headlamp made thin by the blistering wind driving ice crystals into him like millions of tiny daggers.
By the time he got back Rachel had washed up and changed. She was slipping under the covers, and he didn’t even try to avert his gaze. Just soaked in the glimpse he was offered, from the flash of long legs to the long-john-covered curve of her ass in the second before the fabric fell and blocked his view of paradise.
He felt damn smart at how well his planning had gone down. “I’ll only be a minute.”
“No rush. Actually, I didn’t mean that. Don’t take too long, because it’s really cold under here.” Her voice rattled, and his heart rate skipped a beat at the implied invitation, even though they both knew where they stood.
“You’ve got a sleeping bag that’s good to minus forty,” he pointed out. “It’s going to get damn warm under there fast enough.”
He wasn’t even making a dirty joke.
The single candle flickering on the table provided enough light to hurry through washing up. He didn’t bother to strip, just blew out the candle and made his way the short distance to the bed where Rachel waited, curled into a tight ball, her face hidden against her pillow.
Crawling under the thick sleeping bag was like opening the doors to an all-you-can-eat buffet and being told he couldn’t partake. Still he held firm, the heat from Rachel’s body stealing toward him.
To hell with it. “You okay spooning?”
She answered by putting her icy-cold feet on his thigh.
Lee nearly jumped out of his skin. Even through his sweats it was like getting a snow wedgie. “Jeez, woman.”
Rachel wiggled against him, the heat pouring off her back a blessing after the frigid temperatures outside had turned ninety-nine percent of his anatomy to ice.
She slid one foot between his legs, and he stiffened again. “Hell, what have you been doing? Sticking your feet out the window?”
“I can’t stand sleeping with socks on, and I always have cold feet.”
“Awesome.” Lee reached under the covers until he could move her to a different position, cupping her cold toes in his hand and rubbing to warm them up.
Rachel tried to escape. “That tickles,” she complained with a laugh.
“Face your punishment.”
When he finally released her, she moved into the space beside him, the mattress at the edge of the bed far colder than the space between them. Lee slipped an arm over her and tugged, tucking her soft curves against him. They fit perfectly even with her muscles held taut. It took a few minutes before she relaxed. Giving in softly as her breathing slowed.
Heaven and hell were held in perfect fusion at that moment. If facing a short time of pain was what it took, he was more than happy to suffer now to gain paradise forever. He was brilliant.
Yet at four in the morning he wasn’t feeling so smart.
Sometime in the past couple hours after they’d both fallen asleep, Rachel had rolled over and snuggled in. She was cuddled against his chest, plus she’d wormed one leg between his. It would’ve been bad enough waking up in bed with her and dealing with normal morning wood, but there was nothing normal about how he felt right then. Pitch black in the cabin, nothing to be seen outside the window yet, but he didn’t need to see to know everything he wanted was within his grasp.
He was not just what a person would call an idiot, he was a bloody idiot. It was his own damn fault he was lying there with a hard-on that could give a baseball bat a run for its money.
A sharp gust of wind rocked tree branches against the outer wall, but it was only a momentary distraction. He braced himself and rolled from the bed, the shock of the chilled room knocking his arousal back a notch.
As he hurried to reload the small stove with fuel, his mind was far too willing to take him into trouble. Images of Rachel on her knees in front of him flashed into his brain, her soft fingers curled around his shaft, her beautiful red lips surrounding him, and he grit his teeth.
He snuck back under the sleeping bag and dragged her against him to warm the ice in his veins, and she cuddled in with a sigh, still sound asleep.
What he wanted was to roll her under him and let her feel exactly how hard she made him just by being there. How every time she caught him with those big brown eyes, it was as if she were looking into his soul and begging him to take care of her in all the right ways.
And once he had her there? He’d start at the top and work his way down, ripping away the long underwear she wore as pyjamas. Fine woven material that was paper-thin and silky soft. He knew this because even now one of his hands rested on Rachel’s ass, the bottom edge of her top in line with his palm. That left his fingertips in contact with the satiny-smooth fabric covering her butt. He swallowed hard—there was no way he could deny that he’d been looking for a glimpse of what she wore to bed. And it might be warm, but it wasn’t much of a barrier, proof of that in the rounded curve he brushed as he adjusted position ever so slightly.
Far too much of a masochist to roll away, he leaned back and let her fall where she would, which ended up being on top of him. Her head lay on his shoulder and chest, one hand clutching his other shoulder as her breasts and hips covered him.
He’d gone from freezing cold only moments earlier to boiling hot. Lee desperately needed to toss back the cover. Everywhere they touched he pictured shimmering rays, like the heat on the asphalt in the middle of summer on a deserted road. That’s what was rising off them in spite of the layers of clothing between them.
Far too thin layers as his cock attempted to tunnel its way out of his sweats.
Yup, this entire situation was his own damn fault, so he would lie there like a good little prisoner and take his punishment.
Even being tormented by the feel of her against him was better than what he’d suffered through last summer, silently saying goodbye as she left town with her new husband. Suffering later when he caught the bastard cheating on her. Then lost in uncertainty. How could he support her, or was there any way to reduce her pain?
He hadn’t been the one to tell her about her husband’s cheating, but he’d been sure to give Gary a couple of solid rounds of his displeasure applied with his fists.
And now he lay in bed with Rachel Malone. Six months earlier if someone had told him they’d be stuck in a cabin together, cuddled up like two kittens nestled in a box, he would’ve sworn whoever was making the prediction was out of their damn mind.
Funny how the world changed.
Rachel wiggled, and it was heaven and hell to
feel her brush against him.
Gary had hurt her, though, had taken so much from her. That’s another reason why Lee had said no to fooling around. He was doing his best to return the control that had been wrenched from her.
His balls were going to explode before this was all over, but he believed it was worth it. As his older brothers would have drolly shared, Lee’s sheer stubbornness would provide the will to go on.
Rachel took a deep breath and stirred further, dragging her knee up his body until her inner thigh rested squarely across his groin. He lifted one arm and covered his eyes with his forearm, biting his bottom lip to suppress the groan that wanted to escape.
He lay still and listened to the wind howl. Listened to her even breathing, and gave thanks both her fury and tears had settled until she was at peace.
He must’ve fallen sleep again because when he woke she wasn’t moving. Or breathing—that’s what gave away that she was awake. If she’d still been asleep, he wouldn’t have felt her tensing against him, her fingers easing higher as if levitating off his chest.
“I’m awake,” he warned.
She tightened like a spring before moving rapidly, rolling to her back beside him and throwing an arm over her eyes as well. “Well, then, wasn’t that special?”
“You didn’t do anything wrong,” he assured her. “Special would’ve involved me losing my load after nothing but you innocently touching me, or me dreaming about touching you not so innocently.”
Rachel snorted, and then hiccupped, rolling so she could hit him on the chest with the side of her fist. “Is nothing sacred with you?”
“What, because I mentioned my hard-on? Rachel, you’re not a child, and neither am I. You’ve woken up in the morning beside a man before, and he’s been hard.”
It took a moment but she answered him, embarrassment in her tone. “Yes. As a matter of fact, I have woken up next to a guy with a hard-on.”
“This one’s for you.” Lee pondered his wording for all of two seconds before adding. “I mean this one’s because of you.”