He would need to go shopping. Ah, well, he thought as he roughly grabbed the brandy from Cindy, spilling a few drops on some unimportant business-related note, and then clicked on the Google search bar on his computer. That’ll give her a little time with the new boyfriend before I make my appearance. I suppose I can at least do her that kindness.
Deuce’s brain functioned in what he alone thought was a weird and wonderful way. He had a strange method of reasoning. He typed surveillance gear into the search engine and hit the return button. As he pondered the suggested sites, he complimented himself on the kindness of letting Jessie enjoy her newfound love. Then he clicked on a site that featured wireless bugs and bumper beepers, and out of his wallet he yanked the credit card that he used for his more covert operations.
Deuce McCall had work to do.
***
Jessie leaned her belly against the grill and front hood of Josh’s truck, her arms partly crossed, one hand holding Josh’s as he leaned kitty corner across from her. Fondly, she brushed his knuckles with her thumb.
“I don’t want to live this way, Josh,” she said faintly, peering earnestly up at him from beneath long eyelashes. “Us being apart. Leaving each other all the time.”
“We won’t have to,” he responded convincingly. “This is just temporary. In a month or so we’ll start on Drifters again. You’ll get sick of me.”
His answer earned a sweet smile and a blush. Jessie shifted her balance. She loved the idea of spending so much time with Josh that she’d get tired of him. Picturing them as an old grey-haired couple still head over heels in love dancing in the moonlight, she retorted assuredly, “Never. You’re stuck with me.”
He touched her cheek and leaned in for a kiss. “Better be.”
“Like bubble gum under a chair.”
“Yuck.”
“Strawberry flavored.”
“Okay, I rescind my yuck. But only if it’s strawberry.”
She laughed. They were parked on the tarmac of the airfield where the Keating jet was accepting passengers from Jessie’s show for the trip to their next engagement - Toronto. From there the cast, choreographer, Dee, assorted stage crew and others would fly to Montreal. After that, they would complete their eight-show run in the States - in New York, Washington, Boston, Chicago and San Francisco. Each show would highlight and benefit a shelter that Dee and Jessie were building, and each was only available to exclusive audiences with a promise that a longer, more intense tour available to larger, general fans, was coming up the next summer. Jessie was tired just thinking about it. But for now…
A loud holler from Dee, who was protecting her modesty from a brisk wind by hanging onto her skirt at the steps’ entrance to the plane, beckoned her. “Time to go, Jessie!”
Grudgingly, Dee waved bye to Josh and then observed none too discreetly as Jessie sidled around the pick-up and folded herself into her new boyfriend’s arms. Dee felt a little pang of guilt as she spied on them. Maybe she wasn’t being fair to Josh - Jessie certainly adored him.
Josh buried his nose in Jessie’s lavender infused hair. It was going to hurt to be physically separated from this girl, even though the tour would only take about two and a half weeks. At least he would be busy on his film shoot. The time would fly. He hoped.
One last melodious lingering kiss and a quick squeeze, then Jessie willed herself to turn and stroll towards the plane. At the top of the stairs, she looked back once and then disappeared inside. Landing in a beige winged chair next to Kayla, who giggled and gave her an excited hug, Jessie made a vow to plan her future schedule as much as possible with Josh in it. This leaving thing was excruciating.
***
The tour went well and time did, indeed, fly. Between press conferences and trying to get adequate rest, then travelling and the shows themselves, there wasn’t much time to think, apart from the flights between cities. Jessie called and texted Josh as much as possible, but she still longed to be home with him, and counted the hours until they could be together again. Her shows were all a resounding success, and both she and Deirdre were thrilled with the donations pouring in to their foundation. Dee was a charismatic, charming envoy for the small troupe, impossible to ignore; she was the kind of gracious lady people easily wanted to please.
One day after an agreeable lingering brunch at their hotel in Chicago, Kayla approached Jessie with glee. She slid into the comfy floral-cushioned high-backed wicker chair just vacated by Dee, and briskly rubbed her palms together in front of her face, as if she was about to disclose the secrets of the universe or, at the very least, some titillating gossip.
Jessie crossed her arms over her chest. With a curious twinkle in her eyes, she took the bait. Kayla was such a happy-go-lucky likeable girl.
“Okay, girlfriend. Spill it.”
Bursting, the dancer erupted. “You and Josh made the cover of People.”
Teeming with pride, Kayla reached behind her and yanked the popular entertainment magazine out of her jeans’ back pocket. One hand on each side, the bubbly dancer held the cover in front of Jessie like a trophy. Initially a butterfly fluttered in Jessie’s heart when she spotted the large image featuring Josh by her side at the Vancouver show, an expression of utter happiness caressing his face as she brushed the lock of hair behind his ear. But then a black door closed over her heart, locking the butterfly carefully away, and Jessie felt her hopes for a peaceful future with her man sink. Inevitable as she knew it would be, this in-your-face cover would be fuel for the fire.
There was no doubt in her mind that Josh would be the victim of much scrutiny and derision. She ached to keep him from the pain the media had the power to cause, as a parent would protect a child from a passel of bullies. The only recourse they had as a couple was to avoid the Internet, the gossip rags and radio and television stations. There had recently been another school shooting in the States. More than twenty-five teens, plus three teachers and a school janitor, were killed suddenly and heartlessly for some unknown reason that spiraled to the bottom of the grave with the shooter. Gun control in the States - homelessness, wars on foreign soil - those were news. The fact that Jessie had fallen in love with a misunderstood man with a troubled past should not factor into people’s minds. Never would Jessie understand the compelling need for others to dive into celebrity gossip, to want to harm her and Josh with barbs and ridicule. To her, it was cut and dry. They were just another couple in love, two people who by God’s grace had found each other in an unsettled world amidst confusion and heartache, and who desired nothing more than the gift of time spent in each other’s arms.
“Kayla,” she said distantly, as her mind shrank against the even deeper menace of Deuce McCall and the ever-present fear of his return, “your brother’s life is about to get really crazy. You know that, right?”
Softening, witness to the alarming cloud that had instantly sunk her boss’ mood, Kayla set the magazine on her lap. “I know, Jessie,” she replied, somewhat chastened. “I guess I’m a little naïve when it comes to all this madness. I mean, I’m getting a taste of it by virtue of dancing in your company, and my dad’s work on TV meant that our lives were never really our own as kids, but somehow our parents managed to shelter us from most of the crap they must have endured. It’s just that - well,” she wriggled in her wicker nest as the excitement was too much to bear alone, “I’m as crazy about you as my big brother is, and I’ve never seen him so happy. I guess I just want to celebrate the two of you.”
Her face fell then, as another train of thought crossed Kayla’s mind. “Unless…well, everything’s okay, isn’t it?”
Forcing herself to smile, Jessie reached out, grabbed Kayla’s wrist and gave it a squeeze. “Of course it is, kiddo,” she said. “It’s just that unfortunately not all of the world is as happy about Josh and me as you are.” She blinked. “Speaking of which, I hope Zach and Hilary are okay with us. I know Hilary’s got her hands full with the kids and now she has to help Dee manage our crazy lives…”
/>
“They’re over the moon, Jess.” Somberly, Kayla added, “We all know what you did for him, Jessie. Just by calling Zach and Hil that night…whatever you said to Josh…and then that card you sent him…”
Raising her eyebrows, Jessie’s cheeks turned faintly pink. As the corners of her lips turned up, just slightly, she looked down at her toes.
“Come on Jess, we all saw the card in his room at rehab. He left it on the windowsill. And being the opinionated people we Sawyers are, well we all had our say in who we thought it came from. And the thing is…well…in those days there wasn’t a soul on the planet who cared a shit about Josh, except for us. Not even our dad. And we had a hard time caring then too, Jessie. I mean - we always cared, but it was like the Josh we knew had died. Substance abuse…it’s just another kind of death, right? The ‘Black Death’, that’s what Josh still calls those days. So the card had to have come from you.”
A nonchalant shrug was Jessie’s response.
“And the song,” Kayla added.
Looking up, Jessie smiled openly at her new good friend. “The song was for everyone who needed a dose of hope in their lives. Not just for Josh. Although I admit he was my inspiration.”
“What was it, Jess? What was it that you saw in him that night? Why did you follow him outside, and what made you believe in him when nobody else did?”
Holding Kayla’s gaze, the singer loved the light she saw there, shining in the deep brown almond shaped eyes that were vaguely similar to those of the endearing man waiting for Jessie back in Vancouver.
“What was it I saw in him that night? Me, I think,” was her simple response. “I saw myself. Lonely. Sad. And maybe there’s something to the universe matching people up with each other, Kayla, because I knew instantly that I loved your brother. Maybe from the second he walked into the club, or maybe from the moment I looked into his eyes, but it was like that old cliché - hit by a lightning bolt - and I know that I will love him forever. I just know.”
“With Paul it was more like a friendship that grew. And it grows stronger every day.”
“I guess there are all kinds of ways to fall in love, kiddo. The hard part is keeping it, with all the crap that we have to deal with in our everyday lives. Therein lies the challenge.”
She seized the magazine from Kayla’s lap and held it up, an Olympic torch for all to see.
“And this kind of stuff - I mean, I know people are curious, but - it doesn’t help. People read this crap and they believe it, and my guess is that it paints Charlie as the one who got hurt. Which on some level I guess is true, but he and I have made our peace with our break-up. Mostly,” she added wryly, knowing that Charlie still wished for a second chance to make things right. But at least they had salvaged some sort of genial friendship out of the dregs of their ill-fated romance.
“I know,” Kayla said. “You’re right.” As she got up to go, she bent down and gave Jessie a gentle embrace. “Jessie, my family will always be indebted to you. Whether or not you and Josh stay together, it doesn’t matter. Although of course I hope you will. You gave him a second chance at life. None of us will ever forget that.”
“Thanks, Kayla,” Jessie whispered, hugging her back. “But I only got him started. The rest of you stood by and helped him through it.”
As Kayla left the dining room, a bounce in her step and a twinkle in her eyes, Jessie felt a wave of ennui wash over her. She wished she were back in Vancouver with Josh, holding him close and teasing him, playing with his hair, keeping him in her sights, as if her presence alone could protect him from all of the negative elements hidden under rugs and buried under lowland swamps. She caught herself wondering what the Sawyer clan would think of her if they knew what happened to Sandy in Charleston, and the fact that Jessie was still very much afraid of the man who had caused the harm.
She shook her head as if to chase the bad thoughts away, and she felt her heart swell with love for Kayla, and for Zach’s little clan as well. Loving somebody like Josh was such a gift - he had brought a whole sweet family into Jessie’s life. Including the little ones, Zach and Hilary’s rambunctious, adorable youngsters.
Placing a linen napkin almost tenderly on her empty plate, Jessie rose from her comfortable wicker sanctuary. Absently, as she moseyed across the navy blue carpet, she couldn’t help but wonder what she had brought into Josh’s life - public assaults, a circus lifestyle, endless late hours and extensive travel? Perhaps even…but no. She refused to entertain any more thoughts of McCall, and wondered why his sadistic presence always seemed to be in her mind of late. Was there such a thing as channeling? Was she on McCall’s mind? She shuddered.
There would be time to worry later. For now, as if she were entertaining visual slides in her head, Jessie slid McCall away and replaced him with Josh. And on that happy thought, she punched in the elevator’s Up button and, while waiting for the upstairs shuttle to arrive on her floor, signed an autograph for a petite Asian lady who didn’t at all seem to mind that Jessie was now with Josh. And then Jessie slipped into the forgiving abyss and let it carry her up, up and away.
She had a show to do.
***
Chapter Five
By the end of the two and a half weeks, Deirdre’s goals had been reached and surpassed. A tired, happy group landed at Vancouver International late one rainy night. They were welcomed with open arms by family and friends. Waiting by the King Ranch pick-up under the moon’s haphazard cloudy glow on a slick glistening tarmac, the fresh scent of new rain tickling his senses, Josh gathered Jessie into a big bear hug, wondering how he’d survived for so many years without her in his life.
“Missed you,” he breathed into the hollow of her neck.
“You better have,” she murmured back.
“Or else what?”
She giggled and buried her nose deeper into his musky Josh smell, squeezing him tightly. “Or else no presents. I’ll keep them to myself.”
He grinned and leaned back so that he could see her face. “I knew there was a reason I should hook up with you. What’d you get me? Chocolate?”
Mischievously, Jessie pressed her forehead against his, and then kissed him softly on the now-familiar lips she’d dreamed about for the past few weeks. Sighed. “Chocolate wouldn’t have survived the airplane trip home. Not in my bag, anyway. No, I got you something much, much better than chocolate.” She peeked up at him playfully. “But you’ll have to wait until we get home.” Winked.
He kissed her back then, and swung her around. One of the male dancers, a chiseled Filipino coffee-skinned twenty-three-year-old, sauntered by and made a face at them. “Jessie, you’re breaking my heart. What’s he got that I haven’t got?”
“Um…heated seats?” She chuckled, as her dancer climbed onto an environmentally friendly electric scooter he pulled out from underneath a low building by the metal security fence. Without taking her eyes off Josh, she asked, “Sure you don’t want a ride, Benjie?”
“With you two? Think you’ll actually make it home? Or will you be taking a room in the Sandman Hotel?” Benjie fastened his duffle on behind the scooter’s cushioned seat and gestured loosely somewhere off beyond the airport.
“A room works for me,” Josh whispered solemnly to Jessie, provoking another giggle.
“Bye, Benjie,” she called. “Drive safe!” Jessie waved to her friend as he puttered away in the light mist on a small, quietly purring engine. Benjie was shaking his head and grinning roguishly, manipulating shallow puddles as he steered towards the gate.
More goodbyes were said and hugs shared, and then home and privacy awaited, where Jessie could give Josh his gifts in peace in the comfort of his media room. Amongst various types of chocolate (she had lied, although she had indeed eaten some during the flight, as evidenced by the missing Y in a giant chocolate NY for New York) was a simple photograph of the now famous Orpheum shot. Mounted in a plain silver frame, it was the best example Jessie had at the time to let Josh know that she had been thinkin
g of him - pretty much always - during the trip. At Jessie’s request, Dee contacted the original photographer and obtained a copy of the photograph image file. So to both Jessie and Josh, it was also Dee’s way of saying she was trying to accept him in Jessie’s life. Trying.
To the photographer, there was no greater accolade than having Jessie covet one of his photographs of her. To Josh it was a Karsh inspired image - the moment before he had lowered Jessie’s hand, embarrassed, was forever theirs to cherish. A simple touch between lovers, a truth, a glimpse into their souls - that’s what it represented. And it held the future, absolute and complete, a pregnant moment filled with a multitude of promises, of many graceful touches to come. Josh treasured it, and planned to carefully place it on his nightstand next to the Drifters photograph from season one.
After the gifts were shared and Josh filled Jessie in on the feature film he was shooting, which was going well - the dynamics on most shows were highly dependent on the director and crew involved, and this was proving to be a smooth, well-run shoot - Josh pulled Jessie upright into a slow dance. He had his iPhone on the shuffle setting, and Adele had just come on. A slow ballad caressed the room and swept into the corners, setting a tender tone. Loving that her man was the snuggling type, Jessie eagerly took him up on the offer to reconnect through music. She wrapped her arms around his neck and, with a contented exhale, let her head fall to rest on his shoulder. His navy blue T-shirt hung appealingly just over the belt buckle on his jeans and, after only a few moments holding him under the enchanting tune, Jessie was completely under his spell.
Promises Page 5