by Olivia Kerr
“I’ve seen the ruins of castles from ages ago,” he said. “And I’ve seen landscapes that I thought only existed in storybooks. I’ve seen great lakes, and trees that must be older than the gods themselves. It’s been a journey.”
She picked up on a note in his voice.
“But do you want to see them anymore?” she asked him, cautiously.
“I have not been at war so long that I feel I have the right to complain,” he replied. “Our ancestors have fought battles for years and have never so much as winced. War is the state of life.”
“Yes, but times of peace do come,” she said. “And we would not feel guilty for them.”
“I suppose,” he said, and she watched him with a smile.
“I assume there is no family that you have back home, waiting for you?” she asked.
His head turned towards her
“Why assume that?” he asked, with a smile. “Do you think no one is capable of loving me?”
“Well, it would take a great deal of effort,” she teased him, “but that is not what I meant. It is clear from your focus and attention to detail that you do not often have your mind drift elsewhere.”
“I try not to,” he replied. “Sometimes there is nothing I can do. I think great thoughts that have no place in war, or I picture what my life might be if I make it back home.”
“If?” she asked, and he shrugged.
“It is always an if when you are at war,” he replied. “In any case, to answer your question: no, there is no one waiting back home. There was a woman but…”
“Oh, I see,” Isla said. “Was it because of the war?”
“No,” he said. “It was before any of this started. She was perfect, but her heart belonged elsewhere. I think she was having trouble making a choice, if I am honest, between myself and the man she chose. She chose him, in the end, after letting me think she might choose me for weeks.”
“I am sorry,” Isla said. “Did you love her?”
“I did. And I do not think I will love anyone else again. So, I am content just to live with her memory.”
“That is no life,” she replied.
“What about you?” he asked. “You’re well past the age where you should be married with children.”
“As if David would allow that,” she said. “There is no man who would want me, knowing what is true about me.”
“I don’t think that is true,” Lewis said. “How is it that you can see everyone else’s future except your own?”
“I have seen my own future many times,” Isla said. “And it is never favorable.”
“You talk as if you have lost all hope.”
“When even my childhood friend looks at me in fear, there is not much I can do,” she said.
He looked apologetic. “Isla, I’m sorry,” he said. “I was startled, that’s all.”
“No, it’s alright,” she said. “I am fairly used to it, at this point in time.”
He looked down at the fire. “What a wonderfully built fire, though.”
“If David ever comes back to enjoy it,” she answered, with a smile. “What about...the others in your camp?”
“The others?” he asked, in confusion. “Do you mean do they have families?”
“Yes,” she said. “I assume that most of them do.”
“Some of them, yes,” he said. “Some of them have even seen battle before. For them, this is a way of life. They married in war, their wives bore children in war, and their children grew without their fathers. Some of them hope to find love in the places we find...or even just a wife, if not love.”
“What about Cameron?” she asked.
Lewis cocked an eyebrow. “He’s a bit different,” Lewis replied.
Isla smiled. “I noticed. But there is nobody for him?”
“Has he not already told you?” Lewis asked, and Isla shook her head. “I do not believe that he will ever marry.”
“Why not?” Isla replied.
“Because of his beliefs,” Lewis replied. “He may have told you some of this already, but Cameron did not think he would marry, even before the war. He fell in love with his religion, and he wished to serve his god and his god only. When the war came, he told his father he believed that the Scottish heir should sit on the throne, by divine right. However, when this is over, I am sure he intends to take orders.”
“Take orders?” she said, in surprise. “He wants to live in a monastery?”
“That was his plan half a year ago when he started,” Lewis replied. “Whether that has changed, I know not. However, his devotion to finding a cathedral and going to Mass every day is astounding, so I expect his mind hasn’t diverged from its original path.”
“I see,” she said. “But there was never anyone for him?”
“Not that he told me,” Lewis answered. “Has he told you differently?”
“No, I was just curious,” she replied. “I am surprised that a man such as himself would want to take orders.”
“Why?” Lewis asked.
“My experience with those who live in the monastery is that they do it when they do not have many other options.”
“I do not think that is always the case. After all, you’ve devoted yourself to the pagan gods. You had other options.”
“I did not,” she said. “Not really. There was no one who was willing to take me on as an apprentice. There was no one who was willing to observe my skills or listen to my questions. And there was no one who was willing to marry me in town, with my birth surrounded by so many rumors.”
Lewis sighed at that, and Isla knew he was aware that it was true.
“Well,” he said, “you have said many times that nothing is certain.”
“That is true,” she said. “But I owe my life to David. He has made sure I survived, despite everything.”
“So you are content?” he asked her, and her eyes widened.
“I…” she said and looked away. “I owe my life to him.”
“I understand,” Lewis replied. “But it is not quite the same thing, is it?”
Isla took a deep breath and then looked down at the fire.
“I should start our evening meal,” she said. “If he gets back and it is not cooked, he gets very angry.”
“I’ll take my leave from you then,” he said, and started walking away.
“Lewis,” she called after him, and he turned back to her. “Thank you for speaking with me. It seems that only you and Cameron do so.”
“It’s no trouble,” he said. “After all, we were friends, were we not, Isla?”
“We were friends,” she said, softly. “Once upon a time, when we were both different.”
Lewis held her gaze for a moment and then walked away. Isla settled back down on her haunches and let out a long sigh. She almost wished he wasn’t here, because then she would not be painfully reminded of a time when her life was peaceful.
She saw David coming in the distance and she scrambled to get the food ready. She should not have spoken to Lewis for so long and she should not have spoken about such intimate things. David had warned her to avoid all such interactions, and although she did not truly understand why, she knew better than to question him. She knew better than to do a lot of things, she realized, but she often did them anyway.
“Hello,” she said timidly to him when he finally got there. “Almost ready.”
“Who were you talking to?” he asked and her eyes widened. She did not think that he had seen it, but now that she knew he had, she could not lie.
“Just Lewis,” she said, quietly. “He asked about the plans for battle, to make sure nothing has changed.”
“What did you tell him?” David’s eyes bore holes into her very soul.
“That nothing has changed.”
“Good,” he replied. “Now, let’s eat.”
Isla breathed a sigh of relief and looked out onto the battlefield that they would march on the next day. She wished that dawn would never come.
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sp; 7
Cameron always disliked putting on his armor. It wasn’t because of the weight, or the level of the discomfort, so much as the fact that it represented the almost certain fact that he would take lives on that day.
He believed that the Scots heir had the right to sit on the Scots throne. He believed that rulers were chosen by divine right. None of those things bothered him. But he did resent the fact that his own hand would cause someone great grief today, whether it was a parent, a wife, or a child. There was someone who would shed tears today because of his choices and actions.
“Good morning to you,” said a voice and he spun around.
Isla was standing there, looking much different than she normally did. Her hair, which typically hung loose, had braids and adornments in it, and her eyes were dark and lined with what looked like soot. She had heaps of jewels on her neck and her fingers, and her silver dress sparkled in the dawn light. He actually had to blink several times in order to see her clearly.
“Hello,” he said. He told himself that he wasn’t going to say anything about her appearance because it wasn’t respectful. However, his mouth hung open and he couldn’t help but make a small noise of surprise as she moved and her dress glimmered.
“You think I look different, don’t you?” she asked.
“I’m not sure it’s a matter of simple thought,” he said. “I almost didn't recognize you.”
“Ah well...the gods smile down on those who honor them,” she replied. He looked her up and down.
“And this is how to honor the gods?” he asked.
“Does your god not ask for the adornment of crosses and gifts?” she asked him.
“Yes,” he said. “But that is our duty, to support those who are doing God’s work.”
“It is only a little bit different, for me.”
“You seem focused on telling me there are only a few differences between my beliefs and yours,” he said, and she smiled.
“Perhaps. Or perhaps I just notice more similarities as we go along.”
He chuckled and shook his head. “Tell me,” he said, “will God smile favorably on the Christian beside you?”
She met his eyes. “I want you to promise me,” she said, with weight in her words, “that you will not make any reckless moves.”
“I cannot promise that,” he said. “I will fight as well as I can, but if I need to be reckless for the safety of my men, then that is what I will do.”
“I understand that you feel it may be necessary,” she said, “but you will be no use to your men if you are dead on the battlefield and they survive.”
“It is generally considered bad form to kill the commanders,” he said. “At least, by all the rules of war that I was taught.”
“That does not mean the Britons will play by such rules,” she said to him. “Please do not assume they will.”
“Aye,” he said, when he saw the look in her eyes. “I will do my best to stay safe, but only because I desire to see the end of this war. I desire to see a Scottish king on the throne more than anything.”
“You will win today,” she reminded him. “There is no need for fear.”
“We shall see,” he said, as he lifted his helmet. When he pulled the visor up after it was firmly on his head, she was gone. He wondered if she had moved quickly, or whether she had planned for a moment when his vision would be blocked. Either way, she had disappeared. He was certain that some would say it was because it was magic, and others would say it was because of her own tricks. He did not see her again until he mounted his great warhorse.
He and Lewis had warhorses adorned with armor, while the cavalry section behind him had less of an elaborate dress. He thought that to keep Isla safe, David would put her on the mare she had ridden in on. He was not prepared for the sight of her on the greatest stallion he had ever seen—as silver as her hair, with eyes that seemed red in the sunlight. The horse was positively frightening, and Isla looked even more slight on top of it.
The men parted ways as she rode slowly through the crowd, and a hush went over the army as she took her place between Lewis and Cameron.
“Where is David?” Cameron asked. He had expected the older man to be with her, seeing as he seemed to control her.
“He is watching,” Isla said, indicating to the hilltop she had been sitting on the other day. Cameron looked up and saw David standing on top of the hill, with his dreadlocks blowing in the wind and his staff in front of him. He does look terrifying, Cameron thought. At least, he looked terrifying if one did not know him. Up close, Cameron thought that David was just an old man who was starting to lose his mind. He tended to rant and rave and he did not say things that always made sense. Isla always seemed to understand, and Lewis sometimes listened to him for hours. Cameron wasn’t sure whether he was just being patient or whether Lewis actually saw depth in David’s words. Either way, Cameron turned away from him. If David simply wanted to watch and pray while they rode into battle, rather than risk his life, then that was his choice. His father’s letter had not specified exactly what they were to do, but Cameron had a feeling they had been paid a large sum of money, regardless of if they sat out or not.
He had struggled with trying to understand his father’s logic on this decision. He wondered if his father was losing as much hope as the rest of the men, or whether his father was starting to reach that age where he was also losing his mind.
Either way, he did not agree with the choice. Now, however, was not really the time to think about such a thing.
He gave the signal and then began to advance down to the battlefield. The Britons had camped just out of sight, and although they had sent a few scouts, they had not seen the full force of the army until now.
For a moment, Cameron thought they had made a mistake and that they were outnumbered. They were spread out in a line longer than the Scottish army, and he feared that their line would break his own.
It was only after a few moments that he realized they were in a line of three and the Britons were in a line of two. Cameron was about to give a signal to pick up the pace when Isla suddenly let out a terrifying scream. She spurred her horse forward; her horse bared his teeth, and Cameron actually saw a few of the British soldiers pull their horses back.
Isla had not discussed this part of the plan with him, and so he was surprised by it. He also knew that she was unprotected, out in no-man’s-land, and so he had to make a choice, and quickly.
“Charge!” he cried, and then the rush of the battle began.
Cameron did not remember much of the battle, except in flashes. He remembered hearing the clank of swords and shields, and he remembered hearing screaming. He saw horses all around him, and he saw Lewis stab one of the sergeants. His next thought was where Isla was, and whether she was safe.
She had made her way to the side of the battlefield, and to his surprise, no one went to her. The Britons seemed to be giving her a wide berth. Her expression was serene, and he wondered if she was scared underneath.
He saw one of the British soldiers charge on his left side, and he pulled out his sword. He knew the British armor was weak under the arms, and he aimed for that. His aim was not always good, but this time, he hit his mark without hesitation. The British soldier fell, and Cameron noticed that there were many British bodies around him. There were a few Scottish soldiers as well on the ground, but they were far outnumbered by the British soldiers.
“Retreat!” he heard the British commander yell, and he knew they had won. Cameron relaxed his shoulders and turned around to take stock of the troops. Most of them were still standing. Lewis had taken his helmet off, and he had blood on his face, but he was still riding on his horse, and he smiled broadly at Cameron across the field.
“Victory!” he cried, and Cameron raised his sword in agreement. The British troops were almost gone from the battlefield, and the Scottish troops were cheering. He turned to Isla, who only gave him a curt nod. She was watching the British soldiers leave, and she looked
up at David, who was still on the hill. He raised his staff and then plunged it into the ground, and she nodded. Cameron didn’t know what that meant, but Isla seemed to.
Cameron took that moment to ride over to her. She nodded to him and shifted her horse so he could stand beside her.
“We won,” he said to her.
Isla smiled, slightly. “Yes,” she said. “Yes, we did.”
“Why do you think that is?” he asked. He knew that he shouldn’t be egging her on, but he couldn’t resist asking.
“Your tactics were good,” she said.
“But you do not think that is the only reason, do you?”
She shrugged. “I do not think that is the only reason,” she replied, as she noticed Lewis ride over. “Congratulations.”
“Thank you,” Lewis said and turned to Cameron. “Are you well?”
“Yes,” Cameron said. “You are bleeding.”
Lewis wiped the blood from his face.
“It is not my blood,” he said. “I am well. Isla?”
“Yes, no one touched me,” she said. “And it is dark now, so you should not stay down here for long. The darkness gives them an advantage.”
“Do you think they will try again?” Lewis asked. Cameron was about to answer when Isla spoke up.
“They may,” she said. “No future is certain, but you should return to your own camp.”
“I think that’s a good idea,” Lewis said. “Cameron? Are you content with that?”
“Yes,” Cameron said. “The men will be celebrating into the morning, no doubt.”
“Exactly as I predicted,” Isla reminded him, and Cameron didn’t say anything. Tonight was not the night for an argument. Tonight, they could celebrate. In the morning, they could debate why exactly they won and what they should do next.
“Come,” Cameron said, calmly. “Let’s go back to camp. Tonight, we have a reason to thank God.”
“Gods,” Isla said, and he kept quiet. No matter what he said, she always had a reason to argue, and he was tired. However, he couldn’t deny the fact that she looked beautiful as she rode ahead of them, with her head held high and her spine straight and strong. She had helped them win the battle; whether that was because of magic or because of their tactics did not matter tonight. They had a right to celebrate, and celebrate they would.