“Ever?”
Jonas couldn’t figure out why that question should slam into his gut like a powerful fist, but it did. His bear bellowed and slapped the ground with massive forepaws, expressing its displeasure with its human side. It left Jonas feeling ganged up on—his beast, his conscience, and Annie Cryer had banded together to make him feel like an asshole. Perfect.
“Not that I’ve ever heard of.”
Silence stretched between them again.
“That’s just . . . messed up.”
Jonas scowled. Wait a second, who was she to make that kind of judgment about his kind? Just because the bears did things differently from the wolves didn’t mean they were wrong and the dogs had it right. That would be as bad as him saying the wolves were morons for tying themselves to complete strangers just because meeting one could make them itch.
“Look,” he growled, shoving his hands in his pockets and backing toward the door. “I’m just telling you like it is. Trying to explain myself. There’s no need to get pissy about it.”
Shit. He heard the words come out of his mouth, but it was too late to take them back. He could only plow ahead.
“I only meant that there’s no reason to assume some kind of relationship just because we’re attracted to each other. I’m sure you’ve been attracted to other men, just like I’ve been attracted to other women. It doesn’t mean there’s any kind of cosmic pairing going on. It was just a kiss.”
Annie glared at him. “Just a kiss? Wow. I’d like to know what you consider to be a little groping session if that’s your yardstick.”
Oh, shit, shit. Sarcasm. That did not bode well.
“I didn’t mean it that way. You know that. Don’t be ridiculous—”
Goddamn it. She was a doctor, right? Could he get her to suture his damned lips closed before he choked on his frickin’ kneecap?
“Oh, so now I’m not just crazy, I’m also ridiculous.”
The shy, wary, downright nervous female who had eased into Jaeger’s office with one eye scanning for escape routes had completely disappeared. In her place stood a fierce, furious she-wolf who looked more than ready to rip his throat out and snack on his spleen. And he had only his own big mouth to blame for the transformation.
“If I’m so mentally unstable and prone to flights of fancy, Mr. Browning, maybe I’m not the researcher you want working on your clan’s little problem. You’d probably prefer a more logical and less desperate scientist. Maybe a man. That way there wouldn’t be any chance of anyone trying to trap you into a fictional relationship based on an illogical emotional response to a surge of random hormones. Because that’s what you’re afraid of, right?”
“No. Don’t put words in my mouth, Dr. Cryer. Aren’t you the one who broke off the kiss anyway? The one who said it was inappropriate and unprofessional? Why are you so pissed off at the fact that we’re essentially on the same page?”
Annie snarled, the sound startling in its ferocity. Jonas thought he actually caught a glimpse of fang under her curled lip.
“You know what? That’s a darned good question.” She stalked to the desk, snatched up her backpack, and headed for the door. “For the sake of maintaining our professional non-relationship, I think it’s best if we maintain a certain distance. I’m going to go find a place to stay. You can get a standard HIPAA release form from the clinic. Fill one out for everyone in your clan, have them sign, and get me copies of their medical records. As soon as I have them, I’ll get to work. If you need to ask me a question or give me some information, send me an e-mail.”
She stalked out the door, moving with the lazy, confident grace of a predator and looking entirely different from the uneasy woman he’d met a couple of hours ago.
Jonas noticed she also looked pretty different from the woman he’d kissed just a few minutes ago. If anything, the surge in power made her even sexier.
Fuck off, bear.
Nope. The bear was a hell of a lot more interested in fucking her. Their fierce, feminine she-wolf with the sweet scent, the honey-colored eyes, and the soft, round ass.
Their mate.
The m word again. Jonas froze.
Aw, fuck.
Chapter Six
Furious, embarrassed, and thoroughly confused, Annie stormed out of the Alpha Medical Center and did something she had never done before in her life. She went looking for a bar.
She didn’t have to go far. The Twisted Shifter sat less than three blocks from the clinic, a short stroll off of Main Street, and even better, they had just flipped their sign to OPEN.
Annie veered off to claim the tiny booth directly opposite the end of the bar. She dumped her backpack on the seat beside her, then looked up to find him standing next to her.
He had tousled blond hair, scruffy cheeks, and a friendly smirk. “Rough morning?”
She snorted. “You could say that.”
“Hey, at least it’s over. It’s officially afternoon now. Plus one minute. You want lunch, or just a painkiller?”
Annie blinked. She hadn’t thought that far. “You serve food?”
“I’ll get you a menu.”
The bartender strolled away, loose limbed and graceful. Another cat. Cougar, she thought after a belated sniff. The town seemed to be crawling with feline shifters. Three out of the four residents she’d met so far. Still, anything was better than bear.
Her lip curled at the thought. Bear was her new worst-case scenario. For everything.
The cat reappeared and handed her a printed sheet of paper. He set a shot glass down in front of her and winked. “This looked like a job for vodka. I make a mean lemon drop. I also recommend the burger. And the red ale, if you decide against self-destruction.”
“Thanks.”
“My name is Zach, by the way. Just shout when you need something.”
He tossed her an easy grin and drifted away again, heading back behind the bar. Which was just what she needed—a friendly face, unobtrusive service, and no bears.
And vodka. Definitely the vodka.
Annie knocked back the shot, lips puckering at the sourness of the lemon juice cut by the glass’s sugared rim. The liquid burned down to her belly and gave her the boost she needed to do the second thing she’d never done before in her life. She disobeyed an official alpha decree and broke the terms of her banishment.
Digging out her cell phone, she punched in a number from memory before she had time to chicken out. Before the influence of the vodka could wear off.
“Hello?” A familiar voice answered.
“Sam.”
No response.
“Sam, it’s me. Annie.”
“Yeah, I know. You took me by surprise.”
Annie’s oldest friend paused as if searching for what to say next. Since it had been almost three years since they had spoken, and at that time Annie had almost caused Sam’s death, Annie couldn’t blame her for the awkward hesitation. So many things had changed.
“Are you okay?”
Except that. Sam had always been the one most concerned with Annie’s health and safety. The one who dragged her from the lab when her research made her forget to eat or sleep or get fresh air and sunshine.
“Yeah, Sam. I’m fine. Thanks.” She cleared her throat. “How are you?”
“Good. Well, tired, really.”
Annie felt a surge of concern. Sam was never tired. She had the energy of a terrier in a wolf’s body. “Why? What’s wrong? Have you been sick?”
“No, just pregnant. I had a baby a couple of months ago. Noah and I did. Had a baby. A little girl.”
Now Annie paused. If paused was the right word. She had to swallow hard against a sudden lump in her throat. Her eyes stung with tears. A baby. Her best friend in the world had just had a baby, and Annie hadn’t even known Sam was pregnant. She had missed so much.
It took several more seconds for her to regain control. “That’s awesome, Sam. I’m so happy for you. For you both. What’s her name?”
; “Trista. But her daddy’s already calling her Trixie. He says he can tell she’s going to keep him on his toes.”
“With you as her mother and an ex-military explosives expert for a father? No, I can’t imagine it,” Annie teased.
“Yeah.” The line went quiet again. Finally, Sam asked, “Why’d you call, An? I haven’t heard from you in a long time.”
Annie’s mouth tightened. “I haven’t heard from you, either. In fact, I haven’t heard from anyone. Not my mom, not you, not Tess. No one.”
“You were banished.”
“Yeah, I know.”
But for the first time since the nightmare had started, Annie didn’t feel the sharp flash of pain that usually accompanied any reference to her expulsion from the pack of her birth. It didn’t hit her like a knife to the heart. In fact, it didn’t hit her at all.
She felt a mild twinge of nostalgia, and she definitely missed Sam. The two of them had grown up together, practically at each other’s houses, and had been best friends since the age of four. Aside from her mother, Sam had been the one packmate she had missed the most throughout her exile.
That hadn’t changed, but to her shock and confusion, Annie no longer missed the Silverback Clan. Not the way she had for the past few years. It no longer felt like one of her own limbs had gone missing. It no longer felt like something empty lurked inside her.
She felt . . . full.
Annie gritted her teeth and dung her nails into the tabletop, unaware of the way they had instantly grown longer and thicker, more like claws than human fingernails. Oh, no. She was not going to allow an ignorant, arrogant, piss-mannered bear to fill any of her holes.
She blushed at her own double entendre, then forged ahead. No, not even the obvious ones.
“Annie, why did you call?”
“What? Are you afraid someone will find out and get you in trouble?” she snapped.
“What? No. Fuck that.” Sam sounded irritated, and Annie could almost picture the familiar scowl on her pretty face. “I don’t care about that. Graham’s not going to get bent out of shape over a phone call, and if he does, he can shove it. I’m just surprised. You haven’t even tried to reach out to me in three years. I figured you must not want any kind of connection to the pack anymore. Not even me.”
“That’s not it, Sam. That’s not even close. I was told not to contact anyone. Banished means banished. That’s why I made the comment about getting in trouble.”
“What? Graham said you couldn’t even talk to any of us? Why, that fur-faced son of a bitch! I’m gonna kick his sorry ass. Just wait til I get my hands on—”
“Sam, no. Calm down.” Annie couldn’t suppress her grin. She didn’t even want to. “It’s not worth it. Besides, it might not matter all that much longer.”
“What? Why?”
Annie considered the unexpected phone call from Graham, the bargain he had offered her. The end of her banishment. Then she thought about what had really changed things. Changed them forever.
“I think I met my mate.”
Sam squealed.
No other word could describe the high-pitched sound that echoed over the cellular network and forced Annie to pull the phone away from her ear in order to save her auditory function. Even Zach, stocking glasses behind the bar, winced at the noise.
“Tell me everything.”
“He’s a jerk.”
“Um, excuse me?”
Annie grimaced and pushed aside her menu so she could brace her elbows on the table. “Sam, we just met and it was a disaster. That’s why I called. I needed to talk to someone mated, especially someone mated to a non-wolf, so I could figure out how big a disaster this really is. Although I already have a pretty good idea.”
“Wait, he’s not a wolf?”
“If he was, I wouldn’t be in this situation. I know how mating works for us.”
“Is he human?”
“I wish.” She sighed. “He’s a bear.”
Sam inhaled quickly. “Oh, wow. Well, I don’t know much about bears. Most of them avoid cities as big as New York. But I think there’s a clan living near the White Paws in Connecticut. I could call Honor and—”
“Won’t help. He’s not a black bear.”
“Not a—” Sam broke off and squealed again. Well, it was more like a squeak this time, and a lot quieter. “You mean you’re mated to a grizzly?”
“Brown bear,” Annie corrected her automatically, then grumbled at herself. “And I never said we’re mated. I said he’s my mate. And he’s a jerk.”
“Okay, you’re lucky I just put Trixie down for a nap. I want to hear everything, minute by minute. Exactly what is going on?”
Relieved to have someone to listen, Annie related the entire history of her morning’s interactions with Jonas Browning. She left nothing out, beginning with her first sight of his silhouette in the mayor’s office, and ending with her storming out of the clinic and leaving him behind.
When she finished, Sam blew out a long breath. “He’s not a jerk.”
Annie snarled. “What?”
“He’s not a jerk, Annie. He’s a flaming asshole! How dare he treat you like that? You want me to come out there? Noah can stay with Trix, and I’ll hop on a plane and be there in a couple of hours.” She paused, then hummed. “Or so. Where are you, anyway? You never mentioned.”
“Alpha, Washington.”
Sam snorted. “You, in Alphaville? Oh my God, Annie, how did you end up there?”
“That’s another long story. And right now, I’m a little preoccupied with the fact that I may have just discovered my mate and he’s a complete jerk.”
“Flaming asshole,” Sam corrected absently. “Do you think any of what he said is true, though? Do bears not have real mates?”
“How should I know? I’ve met fewer bears than you have.”
“I’ve never met a grizzly.”
“Brown bear. And neither had I. Not before today.” Annie frowned. “I don’t get it, though. I don’t see how it can be possible for one half of a pair to have the mating instinct and the other half not to. Can that even happen with mates?”
“Well, humans don’t have the same mating instinct as wolves. When I met Noah, I knew he was interested in me. He made that pretty clear. But I had no way of knowing how serious it was for him until he told me. But you know, Annie, mating doesn’t work the same for everyone. Not even for all wolves.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean that we don’t all get struck with a bolt of lightning and instantly know who our mate is the second we meet. Graham says he knew almost instantly with Missy, but I didn’t with Noah. I thought it was just chemistry. Just sex.”
Annie scoffed. “You were in denial about Noah. Plus, you had abandonment and trust issues.”
“Still. Maybe bears don’t know right away, though. That’s all I’m saying.”
“I’m not talking about right away. He said they don’t mate at all. That they don’t even form those bonds, and if they get married it’s just a human thing with licenses and certificates and that’s it.”
“Hm, well, in that case, I call bullshit.”
“So you agree with me.”
Annie let herself savor a moment of triumph. Before Sam stepped all over it.
“I agree in that I don’t think it’s possible for bears to never feel a bond with another being. Even if they were operating like humans, they’d still fall in love sometimes, right? And some of them would fall all the way in love, the kind that keeps two people together for a lifetime. Even human do that sometimes.”
“But that’s not a mate bond.”
“Isn’t it?” Sam asked. “Listen, we can’t ever really know exactly what someone else is feeling. We can’t experience their lives the way they do. But if two people—human or shifter—feel drawn to each other, want each other, need to spend time together, and are happiest when they’re with each other, and if that feeling lasts a lifetime, how is that different from what we Lup
ines call a matebond?”
Annie made a face. “Maybe it’s not.”
“What I’m saying. And anyone who says that no member of their species ever feels those feelings is either lying or an idiot. So which is your bear?”
“Can’t he be both?”
“Entirely possible.”
Annie laughed. “Thanks. That makes me feel better. Even though I’m not sure you actually helped me resolve anything.”
“Resolution costs extra.”
A faint noise sounded in the background and Sam swore, but the lack of heat told Annie she didn’t really mean it.
“Is that the baby?”
“Yeah. Sounds like she woke up hungry.”
“Then go feed her. I’ve got plenty to do to keep me busy while I think all this over. I still have to find a place to stay around here. And you shouldn’t be talking to me anyway.”
“Screw that. I don’t care what Graham thinks. You can’t banish friendship.” Sam sighed. “I’m glad you called, An. I just wish you’d done it sooner.”
“So do I.”
The baby’s cries become louder.
“Go take care of the screamer,” Annie said, straightening her shoulders. “I’ll let you know when I figure out if the bear was lying or stupid. And what I plan to do about it.”
“You do that.”
Annie had lowered the phone and was reaching for the disconnect button when she heard Sam speak again. She lifted the device to her ear.
“By the way,” her friend said. “I should have told you. Trixie’s name. It’s officially Trista Annie Baker. I really am glad you called.”
“I love you, Sam,” she managed, though her throat felt swollen and tight.
“Ditto.”
This time, Annie lowered the phone and hit the button, smiling down at the blank screen for a minute. That had felt good. She’d missed her friend, and she was glad Sam and Noah were happy together. Glad they had a baby girl to keep them on their toes.
A softly cleared throat made her look up just as a white plate loaded with a burger and fries appeared on the table in front of her. Zach followed it up with a pint glass full of clear, dark amber liquid and a bottle of ketchup.
“Got to keep up your strength,” he said, giving her another wink. “Sounds like you’ve got a few things to do coming up.”
Something to Howl About Page 4