But did he have any to give? She might not believe him, anyway.
“There is no truth to her statements. I’m not a monster.”
I’m scared. That’s all I am right now.
What was the point in admitting that? What man ever wanted to admit that at the root of his very soul, he was afraid of something? His career and reputation were in the balance, along with any chance he had to make a lasting connection with the amazing woman in his arms. He barely had a chance with her now. Admitting his weakness wasn’t going to help.
“Kiss me.” She cupped his face with her hands, reaching up on tiptoe. He ground his jaw before seeking her lips. Her minty taste flooded his senses. She kissed him sweetly, the soft press of her lips and gentle sweep of her tongue against his tasting like goodbye.
Her fingers curled into his shoulders, her breasts pushing against his chest. The warmth of her body drove sparked an insistent and demanding ache through him. God, he wanted her. Wanted her in bed with him tonight, her head on his chest with his arms around her as they slept.
Her hips pressed against him. Noah groaned as she rubbed up against his erection. What was this game they were playing? One minute, they were arguing about the future and the next, she was purring against him.
Noah turned his lips to her neck, cruising the soft curve there.
“I can’t give you what you want, Afton.”
She smoothed a hand slowly down his abdomen. He clenched his eyes, drawing a tight breath as she cupped his dick over his sweatpants. Sensation ricocheted inside him at the gentle kneading of her hand over him.
“You can give me this. I didn’t come over here with these intentions, but fuck. I can’t help it.”
Christ, either could he. Noah picked her up, her legs wrapping around his middle as he walked her back to the couch and set her down. In three swift moves, he had her jeans unbuttoned and pulled off, revealing her supple, tanned flesh. Her smooth, freshly shaved pussy peeked out from the triangle of her thighs.
With a groan, Noah roughly parted her legs.
Afton squirmed and shifted herself lower, pressing herself toward him. Wanting, seeking, with a small, impatient whimper that suggested she’d been wanting this a long time. Long enough that her desire stewed and percolated until it grew demanding enough that she find relief in his body.
Sex wouldn’t fix the chasm between them. But he’d never deny her when she wanted, needed, this badly. Noah traced her outer lips with a finger, finding her wet and hot. His ego swelled at her sharp intake of breath. As luscious as this was, he had to know.
“Is this all you want from me tonight?”
He slipped two fingers inside her, teasingly by increments as she bore down upon him, trying to hurry his entry, trying to impale herself with the force of her need.
“It’s all I can get, right? Even if I wanted more... oh, God. This is all I can get?”
He bent low and gave a hard, sharp lick over her clit. She nearly came off the couch.
“Yes, this is all I can promise you.”
His heart sank as he said it. Fuck his fucked-up life! He parted her, licking in slow circles and long strokes that filled his mouth with her taste. Her clit swelled almost immediately, her pussy flooding with the force of her need. It wouldn’t take much to make her come, but he’d do this all night. And then again, and again, imprinting her on his flesh and soul to ensure he’d never, ever forget.
Afton arched her back and moved against him. Her hands flew to her hair, taking huge handfuls as he worked her body until a thin sheen of sweat coated her perfect skin.
Curving his fingers upward, he found the rigid little spot just inside her that drove her over the edge. He pressed against it, released, pressed, released as he lavished her clit. She cried out, her thighs clamping around his face as she came. Her body clenched so tight, he could barely move his fingers inside her, teasing out every drop of her orgasm until she collapsed against the couch.
Eyes wide, face flushed, she looked like a goddess with bewilderment and satiation coloring her expression. Chest heaving, she motioned with a finger for him to move up. She scooted into a siting position, her back against the armrest. Crossing her arms over her middle, she pulled her shirt up and off, baring her naked breasts.
“Give it to me.” Her eyes flicked to his, her intent clear as she grabbed his hips and yanked him to her. Noah straddled her chest, wedging his right leg between her and the couch cushions, left foot on the floor.
She yanked the band of his sweats down just enough to free his cock, both shoving him down to her and rising herself up so she could take him in her mouth. In one slick pull of her mouth, he was buried deep in her throat. His head spun, the force of the quick pleasure knocking him completely off center.
“That’s good. Fuck, so good.”
Noah fisted her hair, holding her head in place as his hips began a careful rhythm. Her jaw relaxed, taking him all again and again. The slick warmth of her mouth coated him, the tight compression of her throat hugging his tip with each thrust in. He wanted this. All of it. To fuck her throat. To throw her onto her knees and take her hard from behind. To feel her soft body tremble and flush from the force of his body.
Suddenly, she pulled off with a hard, wet sound and stroked his thick length with her hand. Their eyes connected, and Noah lost his breath. His balls tightened, a familiar, delicious tension starting there and spreading in waves through his entire body. Her lips were swollen from sucking him, her eyes sparkling with a dark, lustful heat.
He wanted to give everything to her. He wanted her to have it all.
“Give me more, baby. Give me this.”
She stroked hard, fast, sending him over edge. Noah stiffened, sighed hard as his release spilled over her breasts.
Boneless, every inch of him drained, Noah slid off her, standing for a moment to regroup his composure. But the sight of her splayed out on the couch, her naked body gleaming with his release, there was no way to bring himself back to earth.
He’d give anything to gather her in his arms and carry her off to bed, to hold her well into the night. Instead, he went into the bathroom and got her a warm, damp towel. She took it with a small smile, cleaned up, and dressed quickly, making it obvious that staying wasn’t on her mind. His pulse had barely stopped tap dancing when she was back in her coat, heading to his front door.
Alarm flashed through him. He should say something, make her stay. But... why? He couldn’t give her the promises she’d come here for.
Afton turned, one hand on the door handle. Her hesitation stretched between them, flashing him back to that night in Cabo when she’d called his name.
And he’d walked out.
“Goodbye, Noah.”
Afton let herself out, the door falling back onto the latch with a resounding click. Noah ran a hand over his hair, forcing back the instant loneliness assaulting him from all sides.
At least she’d acknowledged him before she’d left.
Chapter Thirteen
Maybe Noah had decided to run away.
He’d been MIA for three days, and the staff were going crazy with rumors and speculation. He’d been fired. He’d been arrested. He’d fled to Mexico.
Afton could hardly stand to hear anymore. She’d left her hospital shift today to a new batch of speculation that Noah had left for his trip to Germany a week early, just to get away from the local media who were doing their hardest to get a statement from the elusive Dr. Narcissist. There’d been no more social media posts from Deena G, but the damage had been done. Everyone had guessed. Everyone knew. Since the television crew had shown up a week ago, management had been making appearances more than ever. Keeping an eye on things, probably. Making sure things ran business as usual.
Afton focused on her work, but it felt anything but routine. There was a palpable absence of Noah’s presence. When the babysitter called today, stating that Kylie had a fever again, Afton was glad to be home and away from the department.
>
He’d not texted or called her, nor was management giving any indication as to his absence. She had half a mind to show up at his house again but nixed the idea. He was lying low for a reason, whether by his own choice or required by hospital management. This didn’t involve her anyway, did it? No, they’d had their fun. They’d had it out. She’d gone to him looking for... something.
Reassurance, maybe something that solidified the growing desire in her to be with him. To be a family. For fuck’s sake, she wanted to live out her stupid fantasy of a happy little family! She leaned her forehead into her hand and looked out her kitchen window.
She was a silly girl with ridiculous, impractical ideas. Recreating the family in her dreams, in real life, was pure wishful fantasy. Reality was a father who wouldn’t stop calling her, a mother who had passed too damn early, and a baby daddy embroiled in a nightmare that made him emotionally unavailable. Reality said it was just her and Kylie, like always. And Afton needed to dump the juvenile fairytale fantasy.
Her phone buzzed. Another message from her father. She’d ignored all thirteen of them; had finally stopped checking when she realized Noah wasn’t going to contact her. She was tired of this game with her father. She hadn’t seen him since the day he’d shown up here, accusing Noah. Her heart was in turmoil right now. Worried about Noah. Guilt over how they’d spent their last bit of time together. Wanting more.
Kylie fussed from her crib. Afton went to her, her heart sinking when her hands met her baby’s hot skin. She was burning up! She’d been a little fussy last night, seemed a touch warm, but had been back to normal when she’d left for work this morning. By the time the sitter had called five hours into Afton’s shift, Kylie had a low-grade fever.
Right now, the glassy look in her daughter’s eyes and parched lower lip told her illness was progressing. She sat and lay Kylie across her lap and scanned her forehead with a thermometer. Her middle clenched as it beeped one-hundred and four point five.
She should call Noah.
The thought cemented in her mind, but she uprooted it quickly and tossed it away. What good would that do? He’d made it clear he didn’t have room for his daughter in his life right now. The decisions were still Afton’s to make. So, off to the ER it was.
She dressed in yoga pants and a loose athletic top with a scoop in the back and a high-low cut that covered her curves. She then tossed some extra clothes in the diaper bag for Kylie, buckled her into her car seat and called a cab.
Her phone rang immediately after she hung up. Concerned it was the cab company calling back, she answered without looking.
“Hello?”
“Afton.”
Fuck. Her father.
“I can’t talk right now, dad. Kylie is sick.”
“It will only take a minute.”
His voice sounded different. Flat. Devoid of his normal sarcastic undertone.
“I’m heading to the ER right now. I’ve got to go.”
She was about to hang up when a sound came through the phone. A sound she’d never heard before.
“What’s wrong with Kylie?”
True compassion. Smooth, and clear, and strong in his voice. He wasn’t asking to manipulate her into staying on the line longer. He was really concerned. The unexpectedness of it left her momentarily unsure how to respond.
“Um, high fever, not drinking very well. After her recent illness, I don’t think I should wait to have her evaluated.”
“I’ll meet you at Regions.”
She shook her head as if he could see her. “I’m going to North. I’ll call you later, okay?”
No, she wouldn’t. This daughter-father thing had run its course a long time ago and she was putting it rest for good. For her own mental health. She disconnected without waiting for him to reply. Twenty minutes later, she was walking back into the ER, on the flip side as she registered at the desk and took a seat in the waiting room. A chorus of other babies were crying, prompting Kylie to fuss in her seat and let out a wail or two of her own.
Afton lifted her out and held her tightly. The dry heat of her body permeated through her cotton one-piece. No telling how long the wait would be. Hopefully, Kylie would drift off to sleep, though with all the noise, it might be hard.
Minutes passed with more people spilling into the room, looking for seats. A large woman strolled in, followed by a man with pants so low, the waist was nearly dropped over his buttocks. Afton tried not to stare, but something about them gave her an uneasy feeling. They stopped at registration and banged on the protective plexiglass cage. The registrars inside were clearly helping other patients, but the couple weren’t deterred.
“Yeah, we get some help here, please?” The woman tossed back stringy blonde hair, the sheen on her pale skin taking on a yellowish glow. Maybe she really was sick, liver disease or something, though by the way she’d strode in like she owned the place, it was hard to tell.
Afton turned away from the drama, watched her baby as she lay sleepily in her arms.
It was times like these when she wished she wasn’t doing this alone.
“Afton? Why are you sitting out here?”
A familiar, hushed voice pulled her attention. Maddie smiled big and grabbed the car seat. “You should have just come back. Come on.”
Gratefully, Afton stood and followed her friend. They passed registration, the large woman giving them a sneer as they went.
“Oh, hell no. Where they going already? Hey, I need to go first. You need to see me first. I’m in pain, here.”
The sides of Maddie’s mouth tightened, and Afton couldn’t control the pangs of anxiety at the woman’s outburst.
“The triage nurse will be with you as soon as she can,” Maddie said, not missing a beat as she swiped her badge and opened the waiting room door. Afton breathed a sigh of relief when it closed behind them.
“Girl, why didn’t you just come back here? You know one of the doctors would have seen Kylie right away!”
Maddie pulled open the front curtain to one of the exam rooms. All the curtain partitions were open, creating one big space instead of three separate rooms. Afton sat on the side of the bed with Kylie, feeling a bit exposed.
“I don’t want to be one of those people. I can wait like everyone else.”
Maddie just shook her head and took Kylie’s vital signs. “It’s a benefit of working here, remember? You don’t have to wait like everyone else. Ooof, she’s burning up.”
“I know. I gave her fever reducer, but it’s not seeming to do much.”
Maddie finished up, then stood bent her head low to Afton’s ear. “He’s here.”
“Really?”
“Said he’s been on administrative leave.”
Afton’s body went loose, as if she’d been carrying a ton of tension without realizing it. A pang of hurt sliced through her. Maybe he’d decided to take Rashida up on her offer. Maybe he’d decided to run away, after all.
“Do you want me to quietly tell him you’re here?”
“I... I’m not sure.” She looked at her baby, their baby, sleeping restlessly, her little face red from fever. “No. It’s okay.”
“Okay, if you’re sure. I can be stealthy though. Super sneaky ninja skills and all that.”
Afton huffed a laugh. “Were you a spy in your past life?”
“Nope. A Kindergarten teacher.” She winked and walked out of the room.
Noises from outside the exam room started to blend together. Typical, as the department got busier and people bustled in a hundred directions. Through it all, Afton focused to hear his voice, to pick out the deep tones from the chaotic ramble. But if he were speaking, it was too low for her desperate ears to detect. She couldn’t catch sight of him anywhere. Maybe he’d left.
Five days without a word. Each day had brought another pulse of loneliness and worry. God, she cared more than she’d realized. Even as uncertain as his circumstances were right now, all the small, tender things added up.
Quick fo
otfalls came from the left. A second later, EMS rushed by, pushing a cot. They moved into the room next to her, their voices rushed. “Gave him Narcan already. No response.”
“Get another ready.”
“It’s right here, ready to go.”
She peered to her right, getting a clear view of the next room since the curtain hadn’t yet been closed. It looked like Bruce, their frequent drug overdose patient. The pallor and bloat to his face made it hard to tell though. The EMT’s were unbuckling the cot straps, getting ready to move him onto the bed. They paused, looked at each other, and froze.
“Hey, you can’t go in there!”
A flurry of people ran in front of her door. Slipping off the bed, she moved to the side to have a better look. Noah was by the Core, a gray-haired man in a tailored suit standing beside him. Both were looking toward the waiting room doors with wide eyes. Maddie swiftly opened the Core door with her badge and rushed inside.
The hairs on the back of Afton’s neck stood up. What was happening? The entire department had gone still.
Kylie gave a cry in her sleep. Jerking at the sound, Afton clutched her snuggly to her chest. The sound drew Noah’s attention. His face paled when he spotted her.
Stay back, he mouthed.
“You!” An angry female voiced echoed over the walls. “Yeah, you. We need to talk.”
A woman came into view, the same from the waiting room, pointing at Dr. Charles, who was watching from inside the Core.
Kylie wailed again, her parched lips twisting as if she were in pain. Afton tried to sush her, but the baby stretched and punched her fists in the air. A tantrum was coming. Suddenly, the woman looked her way, catching Afton’s eyes.
She sneered. “Yeah, maybe me and you gonna talk instead.”
The woman’s arm came up, gun pointed at Afton.
# # #
“Everybody stop fucking moving and get ya hands where we can see ‘em.”
Two men rushed in, one brandishing a single gun, the other, a gun in each hand. Noah backed up as one of the men strode by waving his weapon in a dramatic arc. He expected gunfire to let loose in a chaotic blast, but thankfully, the man didn’t pull the trigger.
Baby in His Arms Page 13