by Edie Claire
“No, no!” she interrupted. “I only want you to promise me one thing, love. I want you to promise me you’ll think about it. About everything I’ve said. And I want you to promise you’ll leave that ring on your finger while you do. I want you to see it there, every time you look at your hand, and think about what a wonderful thing a marriage between a man and a woman can be. Will you promise me, Thane? Please? Will you promise me just this one thing? Out of respect for all the years, for everything we’ve been through together?”
Thane was pretty sure she was asking for at least two things. He was also pretty sure that somewhere inside that inscrutable brain of hers, a screw had finally come loose. But it was true that they’d been through a lot together, ever since they’d been teenagers growing up in the mill town of Port McNeill on the rural north end of Vancouver Island. It was also true that she appeared to be one hundred percent, drop-dead serious about wanting to marry him. No matter how bizarre the circumstances, only a total jerk wouldn’t take that as a compliment. Vanessa was a good-looking woman. She was also reasonably smart, aside from the insanity thing, and it wasn’t as though she were a bad person. Surely he owed it to her to at least let her down gently.
“I’ll think about it,” he heard himself croak. And think he would. It would take every minute of the next forty-eight hours to come up with the appropriate words to turn her down. He sure as hell couldn’t say what he was really thinking. “That’s… all I can promise,” he finished.
“And the ring!” she squeaked, her face lighting up even more. “You’ll keep it on? Oh, please, please, say you will, Thane! It means so much to me!”
He felt his chin nodding in agreement.
The imaginary noose cinched tighter. Involuntarily, he pulled his hands out of hers and fingered his throat.
Vanessa popped up in her seat, leaned forward, and gave him a perfunctory peck on the lips. “Yes!” she declared loudly, all smiles. “I’m so happy! Remember, not a word more about it for the rest of the weekend. We can order our food now. Would you like your usual? The pulled pork?”
Thane found himself nodding again. He hadn’t felt so taken off guard at any previous point in his thirty-four years. He was a capable, independent man, a veteran outdoorsman who could and did handle himself in rugged Canadian outposts in every season of the year. How had he gotten himself into such a ludicrous situation with a woman? There was no excuse.
But he could always go for pulled pork.
The plane touched down on the tarmac and bounced roughly, shaking Thane out of his reverie. He hadn’t told Vanessa he was clearing out for the weekend. He’d merely left a note on his door, having no doubt she’d find it within hours. She lived in the same apartment building and found cause to “drop by” frequently.
The plane slowed to a crawl, then began to taxi, and like most everyone else on board, Thane reflexively pulled out his phone. Then he reconsidered. He’d told Vanessa in the note that he’d be out of cellular range for most of his trip, but she would doubtless have already started blasting him with gushy, emoji-filled texts. He repocketed the device without turning it on. When he got to his final destination, he would email and tell her he’d arrived safely. Then he’d chuck the damn thing in his luggage for the duration.
He relaxed into his seat, looked out the window again, and allowed himself a smile. If he was running away from his problems, he didn’t care. It felt too good to be in Alaska again, and this particular visit was long overdue. He had one and a half precious days to hang out with his favorite mentor, enjoy some of his boyhood haunts, and scope out job possibilities.
He would enjoy himself while he could.
Chapter 3
Mei Lin sat on the deck with one of Elsie’s many reference books spread out in her lap. It was an atlas of the United States, complete with topographic and climate maps. Ready or not, she could put off finding other employment no longer. As tempting as it was to accept Elsie’s offer to stay and enjoy the rest of the short Alaskan summer, Mei Lin had to get back to work. She needed the money.
Elsie had paid a generous wage in addition to room and board, but even that windfall had failed to dig Mei Lin out of the chasm of debt she’d acquired in the Lone Star State. She had trusted the wrong person, and she had gotten burned. Such a mistake could happen to anyone, but for her it was merely number three in a string of four grave misjudgments — all of which had charming smiles and carried Y chromosomes.
Mei Lin didn’t want to think about that. Yes, further analysis of her missteps was needed; but surely that process could wait until she’d found another job? Never mind that she’d taken on this job with Elsie specifically for that purpose. She’d figured that burying herself on the frozen plains of Alaska — preferably with no eligible males around — would offer the perfect opportunity for self-reflection and soul searching. It would certainly make good penance. No other nurse, or even nurse’s aide, had been willing to relocate to a tiny, isolated town in the middle of winter to care for a dying woman alone in her home — particularly not in a climate where gray skies brought almost constant rain or snow and daylight lasted a whopping six hours!
But Gustavus had surprised her. Far from making Mei Lin suffer, the picturesque, friendly little town had lulled her into a fantasy world. Between the towering white peaks above and the icy blue waters below, the savage beauty of Alaska had made her past seem more like a bad dream than reality. Which meant that instead of spending the last seven months working through her issues, she had been shamelessly relaxing into bliss.
“So, where would you like to live next?” she asked herself out loud, interrupting her own guilty thoughts. “The Pacific Northwest, maybe?” Any landscape that reminded her of Alaska appealed. She used to find wet weather dreary, but now she associated cloudy skies and precipitation with friendly people and unlocked doors. Why not Seattle? Or perhaps Portland, Oregon? As much as she had always loved New England, she couldn’t return home now without feeling like a dog with its tail between its legs. And any place hot enough to remind her of Texas was Out with a capital O.
Gravel crunched loudly in the driveway, and Mei Lin’s spirits leapt. She loved having visitors. Elsie had encouraged friends to drop by anytime, particularly after she became bedridden; and since Elsie had a lot of friends, traffic at the house had always been steady. The fact that people kept dropping by even after the funeral moved Mei Lin to tears. She set the book down and walked around to the front balcony.
Carol McRoberts parked her Honda CRV near the guest house and hopped out with a wave. “I lied to you, Mei Lin,” she called out cheerfully. “Got a renter after all! Friend of Dave Markov’s. Shouldn’t give you any trouble.”
“That’s fine,” Mei Lin called back as yet another vehicle started down the drive. She expected to see the aforementioned tourist in one of Ron’s rentals, but when a familiar red pickup passed by the guesthouse and kept coming, she smiled and walked down the outside steps to meet the driver. “Hey, Bill!” she greeted happily.
“Hey, there,” the tall, middle-aged man answered as he stepped out of his truck. Bill Hoskins ran a charter boat business, and Mei Lin knew him well. His wife Jeanie, the head librarian in town, had been another of Elsie’s closest buds. “Looky here what I brought,” he said with a grin, extending a bundle wrapped in brown wax paper.
“Oh, my,” Mei Lin said cheerfully, even as her heart sank. “Is this what I think it is?”
“Fresh sockeye,” he replied, handing it over. “Caught it myself earlier today. Now you can get cooking and have a party.”
“That’s so sweet of you! Thank you.” Mei Lin mentally reviewed her available freezer space. There was none. Half the town had been in the habit of bringing Elsie food, usually way more than both she and Mei Lin could eat, and the deep freeze was now full to the brim with fish and game. Mei Lin had hoped to clear out some of the backlog by feeding people after the funeral, but it was no use; the townsfolk had brought more food to that event than they had
consumed during it, so now even Elsie’s regular freezer was packed with casseroles, soups, and desserts.
“It’s nothing. Enjoy,” Bill said, getting back in his truck.
Mei Lin waved goodbye as he turned the vehicle around and drove away. He had to pull to one side of the drive as the iconic Spider van squeezed by on its approach to the guesthouse. Ron’s Rentals was clearly down to the bottom of the barrel, but that’s what happened when one showed up in Gustavus on a Saturday in July without making reservations.
She took the bundle inside, laid it out on the counter, and unwrapped it just enough to take a peek. Oh, dear. It was a ridiculous amount of fish. Bill had already cut off the head and tail — the weight she felt was all salmon steaks. Plus fins and scales, of course. She had no more idea how to cook such a beast than she did how to field dress a moose. She could cope with small pieces of deboned fish, but whenever Elsie had wanted wild-caught salmon, Carol had taken it home and prepared it for them.
Mei Lin rewrapped the bundle and headed back outside to offer it to Carol for her own dinner, but by the time she reached the driveway, the CRV was already pulling out. The idea of scraping scales off the sides of a recently living fish made Mei Lin queasy, but she couldn’t let the food go to waste. As much as fresh sockeye cost in restaurants, that would be criminal.
She turned towards the guesthouse and started walking. Whoever Carol had just installed there, it was highly unlikely they’d thought to pick up groceries before the GusMart closed. And tourists had to eat something, didn’t they?
She knocked on the green-painted door. The guesthouse had one bedroom, a small living room with a couch, a kitchen, a bathroom, and a screened porch in the back. It was less than elegant, but well kept and weather tight.
The door opened almost immediately. Mei Lin took a half step back as the entry filled with the broad shoulders of a very large man. He was young, early thirties perhaps, with a full head of thick, wavy dark hair and a rugged-looking beard to match. His tree-trunk legs were encased in worn jeans; his muscular torso, in a plaid flannel shirt and battered fleece jacket. If he were carrying a giant ax over one shoulder, he’d make the quintessential picture of a lumberjack. An uncommonly attractive lumberjack.
“Hello,” he said affably.
Mei Lin assessed the stranger. After getting ripped off by Jeremy, not to mention what she’d lost with the other three, she had vowed that forevermore she would ignore her basic instincts about men. Her intuitive judgment could not be trusted; therefore, all future character assessments must be based on cold, hard facts.
She did her best to look at the man objectively. He was a human of imposing size and strength, and if he so chose, he could break her in half like a twig. That alone should make her treat him with caution. Right?
She tried to make herself wary. She imagined the man menacing her, stalking her, even breaking down her door with a bloody hatchet. But those images just seemed silly. He was terribly cute, and he had such an honest smile! His whole countenance was open and guileless, and his eyes practically twinkled with kindness and good nature. How could she help but like him?
Well, help it! she berated herself. Hadn’t she liked Jeremy immediately, too? And Josh? And Travis and Anthony? If she traveled back in time and met Jack the Ripper she’d probably invite him in to tea. And yet…
Her agony of indecision lasted only a second before, mercifully, she remembered Carol’s comment about the renter being a friend of Dave Markov. Huzzah! That fact qualified as objective information, and any friend of Glacier Bay’s chief ranger had to be all right. “Hello,” she replied with a smile. “My name’s Mei Lin. I’m staying up in the main house, and a very nice fisherman just gave me this salmon which I have no idea how to fix and couldn’t eat all of if my life depended on it. I don’t suppose you’d want to take it off my hands, would you?”
The big man looked at her as if she had offered him gold, frankincense, and myrrh. The shock and delight on his face was almost comical. “Seriously?” he replied. “You don’t want it?”
Mei Lin shook her head. He had amazing eyes. Light bluish gray in the center, contrasting with a ring of much darker blue around the edges. Their gaze was piercing, projecting both warmth and charm. “Please, take it. It’s sockeye, fresh caught.” She held out the bundle. “You know how to cook it?” She realized too late how stupid a question that was. The man looked like he could survive in the wilderness by catching rabbits with his bare hands and roasting them over an open flame sparked by rubbing two sticks together.
He laughed out loud. It was a booming, merry laugh that lit up his whole face. He took the bundle from her and weighed it with his hands. “Oh, I think I can figure out something to do with it. If you can round up a couple more people to help me eat it. I’m only staying till tomorrow, and there’s enough here for four people, at least!”
Mei Lin grinned back. So he was gregarious, too. She liked that. “Tell you what,” she offered. “You just met Carol — she lives right around the bend and I’m sure she’d appreciate a meal she didn’t cook herself. If you can fix the salmon, I’ve got a fridge full of side dishes I can reheat. Then I’ll invite her and her husband over and we’ll have a feast on my porch.”
The man smiled broadly. “Sounds awesome! I saw a grill out back here, didn’t I?”
“You did. And you’ll find your kitchen stocked with oil and spices. Carol always makes sure of that.” Mei Lin paused as the nagging voice in her head castigated her again. Was she being too trusting? Would further verification be wise? She’d felt no hesitation when she’d invited him to a neighborly dinner on her porch, but her feelings weren’t supposed to matter. Her feelings couldn’t detect a cannibal on cocaine. “So, Carol says you know the Markovs?”
“I do,” he assured. “When I was a kid I used to spend at least a month every summer in Juneau with my grandparents. Dave worked for Fish and Game, and he had my dream job. I wanted to be him, so I kind of made myself his shadow.” He chuckled at the memory. “Dave took it well, I have to say. He’s been a real inspiration to me. And Mary’s the best, too. I usually stay with them when I visit, but I didn’t realize they’ve got their daughter and grandkids staying there now.”
Mei Lin nodded, feeling gratified. He clearly did know the Markovs. Dave and Mary were unfailingly kind and generous people, as evidenced by the fact that they had invited their twice-divorced daughter and her three children to cram into their relatively small house indefinitely. “Dave is sort of an in-law of mine,” she explained. “He’s my brother-in-law’s uncle.” And she had reason to be glad that he was. If Dave hadn’t mentioned Elsie’s plight at a family gathering in Anchorage, Mei Lin’s sister Ri wouldn’t have heard about the job, and Mei Lin would never have experienced the exquisite taste of a nagoonberry.
“Small world,” the man said pleasantly, not sounding particularly surprised. Then he seemed to remember that he’d never introduced himself. He shifted the bundle under an arm and extended a hand. “I’m Thane, by the way. Thane Buchanan. Very nice to meet you, Mei Lin.”
They shook. His grip was firm and strong, and he had remembered her name correctly for more than three seconds. Her thoughts began to waft in a biological direction, but she quickly reined them in. On that score, if no other, she actually had been accomplishing something. There had been no man in her life for eight months now, and she was proud of that.
Shortly after her breakup with Travis — otherwise known as disaster number four — her mother had sat her down for a “little talk.” An invitation which, coming from Julie Sullivan, licensed psychotherapist, was akin to saying, “My God, you need help!” Theramom had proceeded to ever-so-gently point out that Mei Lin had not been without a boyfriend for more than a few weeks since… wait for it… the spring of ninth grade. What that fun-fact said about her, Mei Lin still wasn’t sure. But her stint in Gustavus had at least broken the pattern. “Nice to meet you, too,” she returned in a neutral tone, stepping back.
“So, what time should I have the main course ready?” Thane asked.
She looked at her watch and came up with a time. Then she bid him farewell and left. After a quick call to Carol to confirm the event, she settled back on the loveseat and reopened the atlas. “A smaller town on the Washington coast, perhaps?” she suggested to herself. Fortunately, a qualified RN could get a job almost anywhere…
Her mind drifted. She had never thought about it before, but all her exes had been short. Downright puny, actually. What was up with that? Did she gravitate toward diminutive men because she herself was petite? Was she graciously leaving the taller men for taller women? Or was she subconsciously afraid of muscles? She frowned. If the last was true, it would make her even more of a coward than she thought. Perhaps she simply didn’t find the hulking, super-masculine type attractive? She mused over the prospect of dating a man who could lift the bumper of a car.
Her thoughts went biological again.
Nope! Absence of attraction was not the reason. So why had she avoided men who were physically strong? She certainly hadn’t managed to avoid the bullies, whom she knew from personal experience came in all shapes and sizes. Could it be that, deep down, she knew she was destined to be manipulated, and that the best defense she had was to stick to men she could arm-wrestle?
Mei Lin returned her attention to the atlas. Concerted self-reflection was all well and good. But some revelations were just too damned depressing.
Chapter 4
Mei Lin leaned back in her chair and enjoyed the expressions of satisfaction on her dinner guests’ faces. Thane had seasoned and grilled the salmon to perfection, and the variety of leftovers she had reheated had been a hit. Carol and John McRoberts, both salt-of-the-earth Alaskans, had taken to Thane immediately, and vice versa. The three of them had had a marvelous time swapping stories about their mutual friend Dave and the Juneau of years gone by, and several hours had passed in a blink. Before Mei Lin knew it the couple was rising to leave, despite her invitation to stay longer. She’d been enjoying the camaraderie immensely, even if she hadn’t added much to the conversation.