by K. S. Adkins
From that day on, he did bust his ass thereby earning his grade but he never did ask my name.
Crawling back into his lap I could hardly believe I was responsible for his erratic breathing. Whatever he had done and whoever he had done it with meant nothing right now. I’m the one, me, that made him scream as he came.
I wanted him inside of me. I feel like I’ve waited for him forever. The way he looks at me, watches me, touches me is too much. If Rome could come undone from a blow job I couldn’t wait to see what he did when I rode him.
“It’s better if I show you,” I whisper moving his hands away to use my own.
Watching me with hawk-like eyes I squeeze him to let him know that I’m in charge. He wants the inside track with me and I was more than happy to show him. “Those hands,” he moans grabbing my wrists.
“They’re just hands,” I tell him pushing his away. “I’m just good with them is all.”
“Those hands save lives,” he moans. “Now they’re on my cock saving me, love those fucking hands.”
Trailing my index finger over the large vein that runs across the top, under the tip and off to the left side I was hit with an idea. “This big vein,” I show him tracing it. “Is called the dorsal artery. Think of it like a large tree branch that extends to the deep dorsal vein that runs here,” I show him by trailing my finger over it.
“Kandace, I can’t hold out---“
“Here you have the superficial dorsal vein,” I continue ignoring his discomfort. “These veins send blood to the glans and arteries through the shaft to the root of the penis. Do you know why, Rome?”
“I swear to God I’m trying to follow you but---“
“Because when I do this,” I say moving to a squatting position and lining myself up with him. “The external urethral meatus swells up telling the arteries they’re about to get fucked.”
Sliding down on him, I use all my weight to bury him inside of me sealing us together. Coming up to a sitting position he tackles me to the floor and my anatomy lesson ended but the ride of my life began.
Pumping into me he grips my hips to hold me still. Digging my fingers into his ass to keep him moving his eyes never leave mine. The look is savage, desperate and sexy as hell.
“Wanted to fuck you forever,” he grunts.
“I promise I’m worth the wait,” I offer before flipping him onto his back.
Planting my feet on either side I start a slow ride. He wants to speed it up, tries to take over but I won’t let him. Securing his hands above his head I bounce softly letting him know he’s on my time. Lowering my tits into his face I watch as he sucks and bites, pulls and licks which has me wanting to come from this alone. “We fit,” I tell him quietly.
“Damn right, we do,” he grunts. “When this is over, you going to pretend it never happened?”
“No,” I tell him sitting up fully. “Not unless you want me too.”
“You’re not a notch. I told you that. I meant that.”
“Okay then. I’m not a notch,” I agree. “I need to come, Rome, use your thumb on my clit.”
Without hesitation he does so with focus and determination and it felt really fucking good. “You coming yet?” he asks creasing his brow.
“Not that quickly,” I tell him cupping my tits. “Rub it hard while I ride you, I’ll come soon, I promise.”
“I hit your g spot?” he asks thrusting upward.
“Uh no,” I say slowly. “It’s not that easy. Don’t worry about that right now, I’m close, so less talking---“
“More fucking,” he growls flipping me over onto my stomach. Pulling me up by the hips he slides back in and with a few more thrusts he’s coming again. “Kandace!” he grunts loud. “Fuck!”
For several long minutes he was silent while we both recovered then while running his hands all over me and kissing me deeply he whispers, “You didn’t get off.”
“It wasn’t about that,” I whisper. “It was about this,” I say lacing my fingers with his and reaching them up over our heads. Content to kiss him I wasn’t going to bitch about not getting my orgasm. Rome being inside of me was everything I had thought it would be and more.
“You’re mine now,” he says looking me dead in the eyes. “I protect what’s mine.”
Not knowing what to say, I was content to lay there saying nothing. Somehow we bypassed friendship and went right into something I couldn’t name.
I was afraid to.
“Your boyfriend doesn’t mind you being alone with me?” I ask nudging her elbow.
“Any fictional boyfriend I may or may not have wouldn’t dictate who I was alone with.” She says looking at me like I was the biggest prick on earth. If she were my girlfriend she wouldn’t be alone with a mother fucker like me, ever.
“You aren’t worried I’ll make a play for you?”
“No,” she says looking over her notes. “That’s the last thing I’m worried about. What I am worried about is you making a play for that book, the one that holds your key to passing this class.”
Just like that she put me in my place. A guy like me never stood a chance with a girl like her so I picked up that book and started to read it.
Having her beside me letting out tiny moans while I learned her body, put me in another place. It wasn’t just because I hadn’t had pussy in years it was because it was her pussy. She was so fucking soft and perfect it was easy to forget that, for the most part, we were strangers. There wasn’t much to know about me. My life to date was a series of tremendous highs and catastrophic lows. Hers though, fuck… she was so God damn sweet, tough and smart I felt like I’d finally earned my freedom. Looking over my shoulder to check the time, I was pissed to see it was five o’clock already.
“Kandace,” I whisper into her ear.
“Hmm?” she asks pulling my arm over her stomach to hold my hand. Not wanting to go I mumble, “I have to go to work.”
Letting out a grunt of disapproval she rolls over to face me then kisses the hell out of me. “Okay,” she says sitting up. “Can I ask you something?”
“You know you can,” I tell her pulling her on top of me.
“If I’m wrong, it’s okay to tell me, but…” she says biting her lip. “Did you like fucking all those girls? Because I got the impression that sometimes you didn’t.”
Closing my eyes in utter shame when I open them it’s to Kandace looking down on me in worry. “You aren’t wrong,” I tell her. “I didn’t like it, I just didn’t know how to stop doing it either.”
“Thanks for being honest with me,” she says leaning in for a hug. Not wanting to bail but having no choice, I kiss her again before getting dressed. Looking at her naked on the floor had me wondering if I could spare ten more minutes but I knew with her it wouldn’t be long enough. Her hair was spilled all around her, her eyes were sleepy but content, her body limber. A punch of guilt hit me in the stomach when I took in the room. Pillows were thrown, her clothes ripped off of her and tossed. I could have taken her on the couch, upstairs in her bed or even the countertop but I fucked her like a notch on the floor.
Instantly I shut down and had to get the fuck out of there. For the life of me I couldn’t figure out why she wanted me. A woman deserves romance and care, I knew jack shit about either. Knowing it was a dick thing to do, I grab my shoes not bothering to put them on and on my way to the door leave her with nothing but, “Later,” as I slam it behind me. I didn’t even care my car was at the dojo, instead, I jog the distance back needing to clear my head.
Clocking in a half hour late, I take my place by the door when Bishop rolls up next to me. This guy was equal parts bad ass and hilarious. He’s one of Jules’ boys and you don’t fuck with her boys. He was also the closest thing I had to a friend.
“Finally,” he says looking me over.
“What?”
“That look is off your face.”
“What are you going on about now?”
“Bro, since you got hired on, you lo
oked like you’d kill a mother fucker if you didn’t get laid soon.”
“Whatever.”
“It’s her right?” he asks smirking. “The hot doc? You finally tap that?”
Not bothering with a response he keeps harping on me for hours hoping I’ll cave. Ten years ago I’d have bragged about it, gave details and then offered her number up so he could get some too. But like all things Kandace, I didn’t want anybody knowing shit. What happened between us was private, a secret.
“It’s the doc, isn’t it? You’ve been bleeding for her for weeks now, details, man.”
“I thought you liked cock?”
“Truth, but I can appreciate a hot mouth. Especially if it belongs to the doc because, dayum.”
Before I can tell him to fuck himself, like a movie in slow motion, Kandace walks in. Smiling at me she wanted to come over but couldn’t because the girls had her surrounded. Venessa hauled her up on to the stage, announced she was back and in a flash she had a crowd. She looked at home up there, gorgeous and right then I knew I was right, always had been right. She was it for me, she belonged to me. Game over.
“Mystery solved,” says Bishop pushing me hard. “You lucky fuck.”
After the crowd calms down Kandace taps the mic and says, “Thanks, guys. My name is Kandace. I came in to sing a song tonight and I hope he likes it.”
He was me, lucky fuck is right.
“Would you get off my ass?” he says pushing the book away. “Not everyone gets it the first time!”
“Okay,” I say scooting closer.
“Let’s try again…”
“I don’t want to fucking try again!”
“Then what do you suggest we do to fill the hour?” I counter wishing he would kiss me.
“You do what you do and I’ll do what I do.” He says tossing the pen.
“So I’ll study and you’ll go fuck a cheerleader? Hey it’s worked for us so far right?”
Rome storming out wasn’t aimed at me. When he was inside of me I could see his emotions playing out; but then like a switch, he shut it down. I wasn’t sure what caused it but he had an internal battle going on. The man took off out of here like he was on fire, and on foot no less. It wasn’t me, I knew it wasn’t but a man running away after sex was a first for me. I had to trust if he didn’t want this he’d tell me. He’d have to, because dammit, I wanted it too.
Giving him a few hours to settle into work, I waited until ten o’clock before coming in to sing. Taking the time to do my hair and some makeup, I lace up my boots and was back at Lush wanting to see him. Walking in Venessa spotted me before I could speak to him and then I was on stage with a crowd below me. Pretty sure I’ll never get used to seeing that. When she hands me the mic I introduce myself and finally spot him by the door. He was standing next to Bishop talking but his eyes were on me.
Perfect.
Although it’s karaoke I never use the music, just the mic. I put my own spin on the track and sing a Capella. Closing my eyes I count beats in my head and when I open my mouth, my eyes follow and find their home in his, always his.
Each word came out strong as I kept the track ultra-slow. Wanting him to understand that I had his back, I hit the chorus with all the feeling I had inside of me. Rome needed to know that no matter what happened today or another ten years from today, I would be there. The plain truth was, even if I wasn’t it for him (and I really hoped that I was) and as much as it would hurt, I would settle for friendship. Wrapping up, I let the words exit my mouth and travel the space of the floor to his heart.
Freestyling to add that I’d claw her eyes out and pull her hair would ruin the point so when I skipped to the chorus again I was floored when the audience joined in. Finishing on, just call my name, I'll be there
I was caught off-guard when the place went nuts. Looking around for Venessa to pass the mic over, I was about to set it down when a man walked on stage, whispered in my ear and walked back off.
“This song is from Jason to Melanie,” I explain sitting down on the vacant stool. For them I sang, Just the way you are by Bruno Mars and watched as they danced like they were the only two people in the bar. When I wasn’t watching them, I watched Rome watch me. Before I could leave the stage people were handing me slips of paper and walking away. Looking over at Venessa, she nods with pleading eyes that I continue. Quite frankly, if I didn’t the crowd might riot.
Shit.
Opening another slip I read the dedication and started to sing. An hour passed then two. Venessa brought me a bottle of water and each song that was requested I sang only for Rome. Rome that was currently front row with his arms over his chest looking unhappy. Opening what I decided would be the last slip I let out a giggle. “Okay guys I don’t know how I’ll swing this one but, I’ll try.” Clearing my throat I draw the lyrics out to keep it slow and under control.
When the cheers startled me I decided fuck it, I was going to have some fun. I wanted to show him I could move, a promise of what was waiting for him later. Standing up I worked the small stage and my body to the best of my ability hoping he liked it. He looked less than pleased at my performance so I slowed it back down and when a guy next to him started screaming for me to shake my fat ass, without hesitation he knocked him out and time stopped.
Tossing the mic, Bishop catches me when I drop from the stage and run over to Rome. Standing directly in front of him to get his attention I could see he wanted to continue beating on the guy but stopped because I put myself in the way. The crowd parted quickly for the scuffle and then Jules was there. She and Bishop took care of crowd control while instructing me to take Rome to the locker room to cool off.
Once inside he punches the locker and then falls to the bench. Coming over to stand in front of him, I rest my hands on his shoulders and he wraps his arms around my middle resting his head on my belly.
“Rome, what just happened?”
“Why’d you do it?” he asks clutching me.
“Why did I do what?”
Looking up at me, he has the meanest look on his face, like I betrayed him in the worst way. “Stop singing for me and start shaking your ass for them. You like the attention, Doc?”
Rome called me Doc when he was desperate or when he was pissy. This was the latter and I didn’t appreciate it. “Any shaking of my ass was for you. It’s a shame you didn’t pick up on that.”
“Fuck that,” he growls pushing me away then turning to point at me. “You are my God damn secret!”
Backing away further because that fucking stung, I wrap my arms around myself in defense of his words. “I shouldn’t be a secret at all,” I whisper.
“You don’t fucking get it,” he says punching another locker.
“Go home, Kandy Kane,” says Jules entering with Bishop. “Rome, get in my office.”
“We got shit to talk about, Boss,” he says glaring at me.
“Correction, we as in you and me have shit to talk about.”
“I’ll be by after work,” he says staring me down. As for me, I was hoping he would show so we could clear the air.
He didn’t.
I was losing her. Not that I ever really had her, but the news of my latest stunt reached her and she shut down on me. We’ve been hanging out regularly until this bullshit and now she wants no part of me. She was the first person, the only person I wanted to explain myself to. I needed her to understand that some shit was out of my control and that I couldn’t stop it.
On Friday, a video of a three-way I participated in went fucking live on the internet. The school’s student forum to be exact. If I could take it back, I would. I don’t know why I did it. Boredom, expectation, notoriety? Maybe all of the above, but the only thing I felt right now was shame. The thought of her seeing it made me sick. Doesn’t matter that I didn’t actually fuck anyone, that I just went through the motions. She would think I did and that’s what was killing me.
When she didn’t show for our session, I went to her complex and was lucky
when a student let me in. Knocking on the door I could hear her moving around but she refused to answer.
“Let me explain!” I screamed at the door. Utter silence was my answer and I slid down landing on my ass. When she opened her door, looked down at me with pity and disappointment, I lost the ability to bullshit her which was my plan.
“You don’t owe me an explanation,” she says bluntly. “Really Roman, when did you ever owe me anything?”
“I owe you the truth.”
“Were you drugged?”
“What?”
“Forced?”
“No.”
“Then it was a choice.”
Then she slammed that fucking door in my face. Banging my head against it I heard it when she said, “I’d give anything to see you make the right one.”
Being schooled by your boss is humiliating.
Getting lessons on being a grown ass man by a grown ass man is even worse. After Jules explained she’d handle it, she left me with a Bishop and a warning that my job was gone if I kept this up. Taking a seat next to me, he rests his elbows on his knees to get on my level. I didn’t want to be on the guy’s level, I wanted to see Kandace.
“What’s going on up there?” he asks looking at my head.
“Nothing good,” I tell him leaning back.
“Can’t imagine prison was easy, but that aggression you got has no place in this club,” he says in an even voice. “It really has no place on Kandace’s shoulders either. What made you snap?”
“Everyone looking at her,” I confess. “The guy talking shit, checking her out. Didn’t like it, never have liked it.”
“She’s a beautiful woman, Rome. People are going to notice her. Women notice you all the time, you think it’s cool if the doc goes around knocking people out for looking?”
“You didn’t hear what he fucking said,” he wouldn’t understand so I didn’t bother explaining.
“Don’t matter what he fucking said,” he laughs. “Kandace was up there putting a show for you, my man. No one else, just you. Remember that, should there be a next time.”