by Joy Eileen
When Trip suggested Claire and I go out and throw a couple of buckets I wanted to bludgeon him with a bat.
I reached into the bucket and realized I only had two more balls left.
You can do this, Kenna.
I threw both balls and gave a weary smile at the satisfying smack each of them made, verifying I hit my target.
“Good job, both of you. Let’s call it for today.”
“I can throw a couple more buckets if you want, Coach,” Claire added, her voice high-pitched as she tossed her hair over her shoulder.
I narrowed my eyes at her blatant attempt at flirting.
“That’s a good idea, Hoffer. Grab a couple more buckets.”
My eyes widened and I hated the jealousy I felt swimming through me.
Claire smiled and gave me a bitchy look as she headed to collect the balls. I turned away and tried not to stomp to the locker room.
“Raine,” Trip called out and I wanted to ignore him.
I stopped, but I didn’t turn.
“Hey, don’t be mad at me,” he said when he caught up to me. “You’re the one who doesn’t want to be my starting pitcher even though you’re better than Hoffer by a long shot.”
I bit the inside of my cheek to keep myself from smiling.
Don’t fall for his southern charm.
“I’m not mad,” I said, finally turning around.
“Are you jealous?” he asked, the side of his mouth pulling up.
Yes.
“No, you’re my coach on the field and friend off. There’s nothing to be jealous of.”
“You’re right.”
Trip stared intently in my eyes as if he was trying to say something else. Before I could figure out if I was hallucinating he turned around and jogged back to Hoffer, leaving me staring at his sculpted ass.
Chapter Eight
“Are you ready for this?” Coach Butler pushed his hat further down on his head.
The day was hot and muggy, speaking volumes for what was in store when the regular season started.
It was the fourth tournament game and surprise I once again found myself back on the pitching mound. I was counting the days until tournament season ended. Two games a month for three months was enough to make my shoulder weep. The fact that Trip had played me more than half the games, and there were still two left, didn’t bode well for my muscles.
I refused to think about the regular season and the possibility Trip was thinking about utilizing me for them as well.
Stupid Coach Butler.
I adored friend Trip. Friend Trip came over and had dinner with me, Renee, Brian, Norah, and my parents twice a week. Friend Trip would stay up with me until all hours of the night listening to audio books about the amazing boy wizard.
Hell, I’d even take patient Trip. Patient Trip was considerate. He listened to my orders. Well, for the most part, and did his PT exercises when he wasn’t in the office. Or at least he did them when he came over to my apartment.
But Coach Butler was a pain in my ass. He pushed me harder than any coach I’d ever had. Even Doc, the pitching coach I had from junior high all the way through high school, wasn’t as much of a tyrant as Coach Butler.
“Raine? I asked if you were ready.”
I ground my cleat into the pitching mound. We were ahead by one and it looked like we were going home with a W. Stupid me thought I was going to get out of pitching. Sure Claire wasn’t on her A game, but she definitely wasn’t pitching her worst. When my last name was shouted across his gorgeous plump lips I had the urge to throw a ball at them to make them even plumper.
“Yes, Coach Butler. I’m ready.”
His head cocked and I could see his eyes squint as he studied my face. “You don’t sound so sure.”
“I’m ready, Coach. I just want to get this done so I can go home and not have to see your face for the rest of the night.”
He ducked his head and I was sure he was hiding a smile. I knew I shouldn’t have talked to him that way, but there were times I’d accidentally see my Trip in Coach Butler.
“Whatever you need to think to convince yourself to get this ball game summed up. Now, hurry up and pitch this game into a win.” He adjusted his hat and pivoted away.
I waited. I knew he wasn’t done yet. Coach Butler had a way of pissing me off just enough so I threw strikes for the rest of the game. There was no way he was getting off the diamond without a last remark.
“Oh and, Raine. I’m glad you don’t want to see me after the game. I couldn’t suffer another childish movie about a wannabe wizard.”
“It’s not childish,” I hissed at his muscular back, assuming he was too far to hear me.
“You were a beast out there, Raine. I didn’t think you had any more games in you the way you talked to me at the beginning of the season. I was worried I was making a mistake not getting another relief pitcher.”
Coach Mae put her arm around my shoulders as we walked to the bus. She moved slower so the rest of the team climbed in, while we were just making it across the parking lot.
“It wouldn’t be a bad thing to get another girl on the team for pitching relief. I didn’t think I had another game in me either, and I don’t know how many more I have. I stayed on the team because you asked me to, but I don’t want to disappoint anyone.”
“I think you underestimate yourself, McKenna. I’m glad Coach Butler’s making you come out swinging for your last season. He has a way of lighting a fire under you and getting the best out of you.”
“Well, he knows how to push my buttons,” I gritted out, already planning on refusing to let him take my ear bud to listen to the rest of the audio book we’d been listening to.
The book I only listened to when he was attached to me with wires. For some stupid reason my finger wasn’t able to press play until he was near. I didn’t want him to miss out if he was into the story, and really how could you not get into it. When he wasn’t around I’d listen to other books, but today I was thinking I needed to stop catering to him.
“Trip isn’t as bad as most people think. I knew him before he got big, and I know for a fact a lot of his reputation is being blown out of proportion. He needs a friend and I think you’d be good for him.”
My head snapped to Coach Mae, searching her face to see if she was implying what I thought she was.
“I know he goes to your house and has dinner with you, and his best friend is sweet on your best friend.”
“How?” I asked, afraid I’d slipped and said something when I was around one of the girls on the team and they told on us.
I didn’t want to get Trip in trouble. He only came to my house when Brian was there with Renee. We made sure we were never alone in the house. After falling asleep with just the two of us, Trip realized how much trouble we would have gotten in if we were caught. Trip wasn’t taking any chances. He was serious about changing into a better person.
“Trip told me. He was worried Brian and Renee’s relationship was going to become more public and didn’t want me to get the wrong impression. He needs good friends. He was and still is surrounded by people who just want to leech off him and have no regard for his wellbeing.”
“I thought coaches and players weren’t supposed to fraternize at all.”
Shut up, McKenna.
Why was I arguing with Coach Mae when she was practically giving me her blessing to continue my friendship with Trip?
“Well, this is a special situation. Trip won’t be your coach for the whole season. And he explained you two are friends. You’re a good girl, Raine. I know you wouldn’t do anything that would get you in trouble.
“You’ll be good for him, and I don’t see a problem with you two being friends. I already noticed he isn’t in the tabloids like he was. I’m not sure if that’s your doing or his PR Company, but I like what’s happening with him. Just be careful and smart like I know you are. If the team found out it wouldn’t play out good at all. ”
“I’ll do my b
est to be his friend and keep it away from the team. You know how much I love the Pappies. If I can keep their star pitcher from missing another season by being his friend and stopping him from doing something stupid, then just call me super friend.”
The word friend stuck in my throat like a spoonful of peanut butter as Coach Mae laughed at my weird rambling answer.
“You’re a good person, McKenna. You’re going to go far in life. I’m proud of you. Most girls wouldn’t be able to be his friend.” She stopped and looked me dead in the eye.
“What do you mean?”
“I know you’ve seen him. Hell, I remember you having a huge crush on him when you first started with the team. Trip has assured me you really are just his friend, and you treat him like you would any friend. That’s what he needs.”
“You can count on me, Coach.”
“I’m holding you to that.”
Coach Mae squeezed my shoulders before climbing on the bus, a smile stretched across her face. As she happily boarded, I forced my feet to make it up the three steps and shuffle down the aisle.
Her words rang loud and clear. Coach never did anything without thinking it through and having the next four moves already planned out. To anyone who overheard, Coach Mae’s words were just what they were.
But I watched her and listened to her for years and I just received a warning. I needed to make sure I stayed friends with Trip and only friends. She was letting me know she was aware Trip and I had a bond and she was going to be keeping a close eye on it.
When I collapsed on the seat in the back of the bus I closed my eyes. Hitting the recline button, I pressed my fingers into my frontal sinuses, hoping to relieve the pressure.
An ice pack landed on my shoulder. My nose burned as tears raced up the back of my throat. I swallowed hard, not really sure what my emotional upswing was about.
A frustrated breath pushed out of me. I hated being this girl. My whole life I was facts. Things that were continuous and could be counted on no matter how crazy life decided to get.
Like Coach Mae reminded me, I always did the right thing. The only time I allowed drama to enter my life was when there was an injustice. Even then I knew the right path to take.
My friendship with Trip was unsteady. There wasn’t any right or wrong, black and white. Well, there was a wrong, at least in the eyes of the school and the team. Trip was my coach and should only be seen as such. Being his friend wasn’t wrong, but it wasn’t exactly right either.
The maddening thing was I wasn’t able to research what I should do. I couldn’t even collect data to make an educated guess on if I was doing the right thing. This was uncharted territory and now there was a watchdog making sure I stayed on a course that I couldn’t even see.
I refused to acknowledge the pain I felt when Coach Mae explained Trip was the one who told her about us. He planted the friendship banner deep in the ground, cementing me in the friend zone and locking me in with no way out.
Disgust at my spoiled and hurt thoughts colored my internal dialogue. Trip said from the beginning he wanted to be friends and only friends. In the time we’d spent together at no point had he been anything but friendly. Maybe he flirted, but that was just Trip’s personality. He probably didn’t even realize when he looked at me with smoldering eyes.
It was the pathetic teenage girl with a monster size crush on him who was hurt. Trip ensured we’d never be anything else when he told Coach Mae about our friendship, and I wondered if it was his roundabout way of making sure I didn’t fall in love with him.
I had two choices, and I needed to decide now. Stop being friends with Trip and finish the rest of the season, the smart thing to do. The McKenna thing to do. I would graduate, take my NPTE, and start the takeover of Dr. Bert’s office. The plan I’d been executing since high school.
Or continue to be Trip’s friend. Walk the line between right and wrong. Stand directly in the gray area. Continue to convince myself I wasn’t starting to have deep feelings for a man who only saw me as a friend, a compadre, an amigo.
A man who really needed a friend. A friend like me who wouldn’t fall for his charm or his shit. One that would give him the truthful answer even if he didn’t want to hear it.
My choice was made before I analyzed them. I gave Trip my word. My word was something I refused to go back on. Even when it meant riding the unknown and quite possibly messing everything up.
“You’re going to grind your teeth down if you keep clenching your jaw like that.” Trip’s hushed voice brought me back to the present.
I turned so my head rested on the window, making it less obvious I was talking to him. It was a wasted effort since the team was at the front of the bus loudly celebrating their win.
“Are we not listening to the book?” Trip asked, his finger poking in my ear and finding it ear bud free.
“I didn’t think you’d want to listen to it. Since it’s childish and all.” I cringed at how juvenile I sounded even to my own ears.
Trip chuckled and it boggled my mind how even his chuckle had a southern accent.
“I said that about the movies. I was very specific to mention the movies not the book.”
I turned so my right eye was able to see him. He leaned forward the only thing between us was the back of my seat.
“Does that means you don’t want to watch the movies with me?” I countered.
“I wouldn’t go that far. I know you enjoy them, so I won’t deprive you of them.”
“Such a noble gesture.”
Trip smirked and I huffed a little as I pulled out my ear buds and passed him one. He stuck it in his ear and winked again, relaxing against the window.
“I know. You’re lucky to have such a self-sacrificing friend, Raine.”
I rolled my eyes, refusing to allow his charm to wash over me. I needed to build a wall, and soon if I was going to survive this friendship with my heart intact.
“Aunt Kenna, can I have more bread?” Norah asked, batting her way too long eyelashes.
“Didn’t your mommy say you had to eat another piece of chicken?” I asked, already getting her one.
She batted her eyelashes for heaven’s sake, like I was going to say no to her.
“Give that baby some bread,” my mom stated, putting a piece on Norah’s plate and kissing the top of her head.
“Mom,” Renee hissed, trying to act like she wasn’t about to give into her daughter’s whims.
I mean, the kid had super ridiculously long lashes and she was freaking adorable.
“I told her she had to eat her chicken.” Renee glanced at me and almost smiled.
It was the first time I’d seen her in somewhat good spirits this week. The Pappies had two away games. After tonight Brian would be gone for two weeks. Renee was trying to act like she didn’t care, but her lack of smile was a telling sign.
“So, Brian, what time are you leaving tomorrow?” my dad asked, shooting Renee an apologetic look.
Brian’s eyes also wandered to Renee. His forehead creased and my heart went out to him. Just watching his body language it was glaringly obvious he was head over baseball cleats in love with her.
Brian and my dad talked while Norah happily munched away on her bread. My mom and Renee talked about some material she thought would work for her newest line of leggings.
“So are you still mad at me?” Trip leaned his shoulder into mine.
I fought my smile with a valiant attempt at keeping it at bay. It was a hard battle, but Trip’s southern drawl was the kicker in getting it to shine.
“Yes.”
“What if I give you a piece of bread?”
A laugh burst from me and I turned to see Trip batting his own baby blues at me.
“I forgive you for making me pitch last week, but I don’t forgive you for saying a certain wizarding movie is childish.”
Trip’s smile deepened as he put his hand over his heart. “Now I was thinking about that.”
I turned a little, w
anting to see how he was going to get out of the predicament he put himself in.
“And?” I pushed my lips to the side.
“I may have spoken too hastily. I’m thinking I’m going to need to watch the next movie to make sure I didn’t judge it too harshly.”
“No.”
“What do you mean no? Come on, Raine.”
“What are you two talking about?” my mom interrupted.
“What did you do to piss her off, Trip?” My dad smiled and winked at me, letting me know he was on my side.
“He told me that my Harry was childish.”
The gasp around the table and the offended looks thrown at Trip made it almost worth it.
“Why would you say something like that?” Renee asked, her hand now over her heart.
Trip’s eyes narrowed at me before he turned to address the table. “Now before you get out your wands to vanquish me, I said it when we had one more inning left and we were only ahead by one. If y’all remember, Raine pulled through and pitched one hell of a last inning, bringing us to victory.”
“That’s what you’re doing when you go and talk to her on the pitching mound?” My dad let out a belly laugh causing the whole table to snicker with him.
“We were wondering,” my mom added, wiping the tears from her eyes.
“I always wanted to ask what you were saying to her to make her eyes squint at your back as you walked away,” my dad added when he got his laughter under control.
“You give me a dirty look when I’m walking away?” Trip looked at me with feigned shock.
“Yes, and I don’t take any of them back. You say mean things to me when you’re walking away and it’s the only way I can fight back.”
“But it gets you to pitch one hell of a game,” my dad said.
“Because I picture Trip’s head where the catcher’s mitt is.” I smiled my most innocent smile at him.
“Aunt Kenna, that’s not nice,” Norah admonished.
“Hush, squish, or you get no more bread forever.”
Norah’s eyes went wide and she clutched her remaining bite. Trip laughed and launched a piece on Norah’s plate.