Balk

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Balk Page 14

by Joy Eileen


  “Wait until you see the room.” Trip grabbed my arm and pulled me through one of the doors.

  The room was impressive. The large bed took up a huge portion of the area. The covers were already pulled down as if Trip had been in bed. I shook my head, banishing that thought.

  “Go ahead,” Trip said, still holding on to my hand.

  “Go ahead what?” A bloom of a blush heated my cheeks.

  “McKenna, don’t act like I don’t know you. Get it over with so we can listen to our book.”

  I didn’t have to be told three times. Taking a running leap, I jumped on the bed and bounced up and down, giggling like an ass. Motioning with my hand to Trip, I wanted him to join me as I acted like a fool. He shook his head, his arms crossed over his chest, a smile playing on his mouth.

  “Come on, Alfred, have a little fun.” I wiggled my finger.

  He finally took the bait and I squealed in delight when he launched on the mattress next to me.

  We jumped until we were both breathless. Collapsing in a heap of limbs, we sucked in air, still laughing.

  “I need water,” I cried out still out of breath.

  “I’ll get the water. You get the bed together and get the book ready.”

  I nodded and Trip moved out of the room. Scanning the still rumpled bed, I shrugged my shoulders when Trip came back. I guzzled the water in one drink. Trip’s large calloused finger swiped a drop that had escaped in my hurry to hydrate. My heart rocketed to my throat and I stared at his T-shirt covered pec, not wanting to see what face he wore. When his finger moved away I sucked in a deep breath.

  Trip pulled on my hand and we climbed under the covers. With shaking limbs, I offered Trip an ear bud, still refusing to look at him.

  “Does your shoulder hurt?” Trip asked, bringing me back to reality.

  “What?” I asked, pausing the story.

  “Your shoulder, you keep moving it around and rubbing it.”

  I looked at my hand, and sure enough, I’d been rubbing it without realizing I was doing it.

  “It does hurt a little,” I admitted.

  “Well, I would think so being that you pitched a badass game today. Lie down and I’ll rub it.”

  I swallowed hard as I turned on my stomach and lay flat on the bed. Flutters erupted everywhere, as I held my breath, listening to Trip move around the room. Before I could figure out what he was doing the story poured out of a magical set of speakers.

  My teeth sank into my lip, wondering why we hadn’t thought to do that before. Instead of being tethered to each other with shared ear buds, we could have just connected it to speakers and listened comfortably. Sadness crept through me knowing I would never have to sit leaning toward Trip as our book unfolded.

  Trip’s hands kneaded my stiff shoulder through my hoodie. My eyes drifted shut as his strong hands worked deep into the muscles. After yanking down the material of my hoodie again, he let out an annoyed breath.

  “Take off your sweater, Raine. I can’t get to your knots through it.”

  Trip moved away and I sat up in a daze. It was an innocent request but there was nothing innocent about the heat surfacing from his words.

  “I think there’s some lotion in the bathroom. I’ll go get it.” He took two steps before saying, “Sports bra off too.”

  I was momentarily frozen as I watched his sweatpants covered ass move away. When he disappeared into the bathroom I quickly shed my sweater and bra and pressed my front into the bed. In my head I began reciting all of the muscles in the body, trying not to think about what was happening.

  Trip sucked in a breath when he made it to the bed. The skin on my back tingled and I couldn’t help thinking it was from his eyes roaming over it. I rolled my eyes behind my closed lids at the preposterous thought.

  For a long time, Trip just sat at the side of the bed while the skin bared to him and some that wasn’t sizzled with energy. My lungs were having a hard time pulling in oxygen at a steady pace. The urge to turn around and bring him down on me was simmering through every nerve ending.

  After what seemed like eternity there was a booming click of the lotion bottle being opened. Trip’s hands landed on my back, and I thought I felt them shaking.

  His large hands almost spanned my whole back as they made their way up my spine. He must have had X-ray vision, because he was able to locate every knot he passed. When his fingers closed over my shoulder and pushed, I hissed out a breath. The searing pain his fingers brought pulled me out of my momentary loss of sanity.

  “Payback, Raine.” Trip’s voice was low and husky.

  The pain was burning away my ability to think straight, and I didn’t know if I was imagining what sounded like desire lacing his voice.

  “Breathe,” Trip commanded.

  The breath whooshed out of me as he continued working my shoulder.

  Trip continued to knead the knotted mess that was my back. Each time he hit a sore spot he instructed me to breathe, and I soon found myself in a trance.

  At some point he turned off the book, knowing I wasn’t paying attention as his hands brought me sweet agony. It was amazing how much pain his hands were inflicting, and yet it felt good at the same time.

  The sexual haze when he first laid his hands on my back melted away as he worked out a huge knot in between my shoulder blades. My mind drifted off, trying to escape the pain.

  I vaguely heard myself begin to snore and jerked awake.

  “Shhh, McKenna, it’s okay. Sleep for a while. I’ll wake you up before the bar closes so you don’t get caught out of your room.”

  “Cheeks said she was going to crash in the room with the other girls.” My voice sounded far away as Trip continued working on my back.

  A loud snore startled me awake. I blinked quickly, trying to figure out where I was. Slowly, the night came back and my blood grew hot thinking of Trip’s hands caressing me. Well, in my mind I was going to remember it as caressing and not digging into knots that took me years to build up.

  Trip’s arms were wrapped tight around my waist, bringing my back flush to his front. One of his hands was precariously close to my breast. At some point one of us must have covered me with my hoodie. I spotted my sports bra still on the nightstand where I put it.

  Trip hugged me tighter when I tried to wiggle out of his grasp. My bladder was bursting from the bottle of water I guzzled, and if he squeezed me tighter I was going to pee all over him. I tried again to get out of his grasp, but his arms were like bands of steel.

  “Trip, I’m going to pee on you if you don’t let me go,” I confessed as I tapped on his arm to get free.

  “Raine, I didn’t know you were into golden showers. Kinky.”

  Trip’s voice ghosted over the shell of my ear, and when he chuckled goosebumps burst over my skin. His arms slowly released me and I sprinted out of bed, barely making it to the bathroom.

  “What time is it?” I asked as I washed my hands and splashed water on my face.

  “It’s three in the morning.” Trip yawned widely when I came back out of the bathroom.

  He looked adorable. His hair was mussed from jumping on the bed and sleeping. The blue of his eyes was blurry, half hidden by his hooded eyelids. My heart raced at the sight.

  “Good, I can get back before anyone notices I’m missing.”

  Trip’s face hardened and he looked over my shoulder instead of meeting my eyes.

  “Yep, your bladder saved the day.”

  What the hell was that about?

  “Are you okay?” I asked, moving to put my shoes on.

  Trip climbed out of bed and pulled me in a hug.

  “I’m fine. I’m not a morning person. Do you want me to walk you back to your room?

  “No. It would be better if I walked back alone. That way it’s less likely we’ll get caught.”

  I lost myself in Trip’s hug, holding on tight. When he released me I let my eyes wander over his bare chest, tracing his defined abs, trying to memorize them.r />
  “Raine.” Trip’s voice pulled me away from his abs and I had to stop myself from frowning at him for distracting my studying.

  He cleared his throat and grabbed my hand, leading me out of the bedroom. “You trust me, right?”

  I nodded, confused at his mood change.

  “I’m trying to be a good friend.”

  “Trip, you are the best friend.”

  He frowned again and ran his fingers through his hair. His eyes scanned my face before he let go of my hand, still not saying anything.

  “I’m sorry I let you fall asleep. You pitched so hard today I knew you must have been exhausted. It was stupid of me to invite you up here. You could still get caught and it would all be turned around on you and you’d be the bad guy.”

  I caught myself from reaching up and running my hands over his stubbled chin. “Trip, it’s fine. I’m not going to get caught and what’s the worst they could say about me?” I gave him a smile, but it didn’t change the hardness on his face.

  “You don’t know how brutal things can get, and if I have any say you’ll never have to. I’m sorry I invited you up. It was a bad friend move.”

  My heart plummeted down to my toes. I smiled even wider, not wanting him to know how devastating his words were to me.

  “It’s fine.” My voice had a high pitch sound to it and I cleared my throat.

  “No, it’s not. I’ll be better at being your friend. Please forgive me for being stupid.”

  I nodded as Trip quickly opened the door and looked both ways before giving me a thumbs-up.

  “Text me when you get to your room.”

  I smiled again, still not trusting my voice, and made my way toward the stairs. When I got to my room, I texted him that I made it safely and climbed into my bed.

  Sleep wouldn’t come. It was obvious the heat I was feeling, the connection I couldn’t ignore was a one-sided affair. Trip truly wanted to only be my friend. He had said it a hundred times, yet my stupid brain refused to accept it. Unable to fall asleep, I climbed out of bed and took a shower before packing and waiting for the sun to come up. All I wanted to do was get on the plane and go home to wallow in my own bed.

  Chapter Thirteen

  “All right, girls, listen up. As you know, Coach Butler was only on loan to us while he healed. The Pappies are foaming at the mouth to get him back on their roster. And I don’t know about you, but I’m ready for my Pappies to start winning again.”

  Coach Mae clapped Trip on the back as he smiled widely at the team, making sure to keep his eyes off me. Even though the girls hadn’t said anything more since Trip started dating Robin, we still kept our friendship under wraps. We were careful not to pay any more attention to each other than necessary.

  Not that we were doing anything wrong. We were friends. Friends, the dumbest word in the dictionary.

  The girls clapped and cheered at Coach Mae’s announcement. My hands felt numb as I clapped along. The smile on my face was as fake as Claire’s nose.

  Coach Mae waited for the applause to die down to continue. “I’m happy to let you know I’ve found a replacement for Coach Butler. And we’re fortunate enough to have him start right away so Coach Butler can help the new coach get acclimated.”

  The team glanced around the locker room, most likely looking for the newest coach. When we didn’t see anyone lurking around our attention went back to the coaches who were present.

  “Coach Butler, do you have anything you want to say before I introduce your replacement?”

  Trip put his arm around Coach Mae and squeezed before letting go to address us.

  “I would like to start off by thanking Coach Mae for letting me join the team. As you probably know before I joined the coaching staff I‘d gotten into a little bit of trouble.”

  The team glanced around, excitement rushing through the huddle at his confession. Trip had never confirmed why he decided to help coach us, and his PR team did a magnificent job burying the car accident story. Trip touching on the subject was like getting a glimpse of a unicorn.

  Trip cleared his throat and the team settled down. I held my breath, my eyes glued to him. He wouldn’t acknowledge me, but like everyone else, I was hanging on to his words.

  “I was at a bad point in my life, and I didn’t know it at the time but having Coach Mae offer me this position in lieu of community service was the best move I could’ve made. You guys have helped me realize who I’d like to be, and I’ll continue to strive every day to be a better person.

  “I would also like to challenge you to look at yourselves and decide if who you are is who you want to be. I know you’re young, but if you can be someone you’re proud of, why not do it now? Don’t wait until you’re thirty like me. I appreciate you letting me into your team. And even though I’m only with you for a little bit longer, I promise to follow you throughout your season. And I fully expect Ws in your future.”

  Trip smiled as the girls once again erupted in cheers. He scanned the team and when he landed on me, he nodded slightly before continuing to survey the team. It would have been imperceptible if I hadn’t been looking for it.

  His words hit a cord deep inside my skull. Was I proud of the person I was becoming? I always thought by following the rules I was doing the right thing. But was I playing it too safe? Was I going to look back and be disappointed I didn’t take enough risks? Or was I just trying to convince myself to talk Trip out of this stupid friend agreement and take it somewhere further?

  Like naked further.

  My thoughts were cut short when Coach Mae introduced our newest pitching coach.

  “Raine, keeping this secret from you was the hardest part. I wanted to surprise you.”

  Coach Mae’s words made my stomach flip. The probability of Coach Mae introducing who she was hinting at was astronomical. I rationalized my wayward thoughts with the excuse of me being tired and upset about my current predicament. That had to be the explanation for jumping directly to the impossible.

  “Girls, I would like to introduce Coach Rutching. Raine’s old high school pitching coach. And we know Raine can bring Ws, so I don’t think we’ll have any trouble keeping them rolling in.”

  The girls clapped as Coach Rutching glided into the room like a vampire. Or at least that was how I saw it. All sound funneled through my ears as if I were sitting in the bottom of a fishbowl. Blackness edged my vision as Coach Rutching locked on me and smiled.

  He looked the same, except more gray peppered his hair, making him look sophisticated instead of like the fucker he was. It felt like a firecracker of unfairness exploded in my chest. For some reason, I pictured him aging rapidly, the guilt and shame of what he’d done to a naïve high school girl slowly killing him. Even if we never confirmed it was his and he wanted to believe the rumors he still cheated on his wife with Renee. He had to feel something. Didn’t he?

  Seeing him look exactly the same made me want to scream to the universe at the wrongness of it all.

  Coach Rutching spoke to the team, but I couldn’t hear a word he said. My head was light and I was struggling to breathe, a weight of knowledge pushing down heavily.

  Trip’s face entered my line of vision, concern written all over it. His lips were moving, but I couldn’t for the life of me comprehend.

  All of a sudden I was being lifted up and floating away from the team and Coach Rutching. A bag of ice hit the back of my neck, causing me to inhale sharply. The iciness helped things start to come into focus. I saw Coach Mae and Trip standing in front of me.

  “Are you all right?” Coach Mae asked.

  “I’m fine.” My voice was weak as I reached back and took the ice bag from Trip’s hands and kept it pressed against my neck.

  His warm fingers grazed over mine as he continued to hold on, but then let it go when he noticed I wasn’t moving it away.

  “What happened? You look terrible.” Trip kneeled so we were face to face.

  “Sorry, I didn’t eat breakfast,” I mumbled. />
  Both Trip and Coach Mae gave each other skeptical looks at my weak excuse.

  “Are you sick?” Trip asked, his hand coming to my forehead to check the temp.

  I shook his hand off, unable to look either of them in the eye. It was stupid, but I felt betrayed. Even though neither of them knew the role Coach Rutching played in my life they could have at least given me a heads-up. Seeing Coach Rutching walk into the locker room was one of the biggest shocks I’d ever experienced, and the two people in front of me were responsible for it.

  “Are you pregnant?” Coach Mae asked, snapping her mouth shut when I glanced at Trip.

  Trip’s eyes narrowed and his gaze dropped down my body. I used my other arm to cover my stomach and finally made eye contact with Coach Mae.

  “No, I’m not pregnant. Maybe I’m getting sick. I didn’t feel like eating breakfast today.”

  Coach Mae nodded, accepting my excuse. “Skip practice today, Raine. You deserve it with the shutout you pitched last week. Get some rest and we’ll see you tomorrow.”

  “Get your stuff and I’ll walk you to your car,” Trip added.

  “I’m fine, Coach Butler.”

  “Raine, you looked like you were about to pass out. You’re my starting pitcher, and I’m still your coach. Get your stuff. I’m walking you out.”

  I nodded and moved to the locker room with my head floating above me. Some of the girls asked if I was okay and I stuck with my not feeling well excuse. As the team went toward the field, I went out of the locker room, happy I wouldn’t have to see Coach Rutching again.

  Trip leaned against the wall outside of the locker room with his arms crossed and a frown. His frown deepened as he took my bag from me and led me out toward the parking lot.

  “Are you okay, McKenna?” Trip asked when Dora moved in sight.

  “I’m fine, Trip. I just want to go home and rest.”

  “You work too hard. The team, work, school, and studying for your PT exam. I worry about you.”

 

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