“I believe you had a perfect semester” Dad controlling the steering wheel.
“Yeah!..It was great time I had this season”.
“So, what’s your plan for the future”.
“I would look forward for pursuing Master” I said casually, pressing the send button of my mobile phone.
The text was sent to Anannya. I waited, she would reply me back. Gradually we were speeding up through the highway. I was stunned this time with the accurate control of the steering wheel. I knew Dad would surely improve on this part. The last time I had cautioned him to check on his driving ability.
“Dad you did work out on your driving”.
“Yes, Son I did. So, do you like my driving now”.
“Of Course..I do”.
I turned to stare out of the window. Just a glimpse I could catch those outside objects that were passing at high speed. Dad was happy seeing me after months, so was I. I couldn’t wait to meet my Mom.
Dad was driving very smoothly, and I loved the journey. We had to halt at roadside inn for short refreshment. We filled our empty pouch and energized ourselves. Just an half hour we had spent, to get ourselves refreshed and headed to move on. The day had gone down, it’s almost the first shades of darkness that had arrived by now. I had occupied the same front seat next to Dad. As we were heading closer to home, the weather began to change. The touch of intense cold I could feel on my chest. I had covered myself with only a jacket but the cold seemed so strong that it penetrated through my porous skin. We were very silent on the road, I could just hear the noise of car’s engine. While Dad seemed very excellent in his driving. He was quiet comfortable with the chilling weather. He burnt the head light on, and I could see the road flashed out clearly before my eyes. I was missing Anannya. All the way I was thinking about her. I was silent for long moment. Neither my Dad and I were in conversation. Just the Car and we both were the only object through the road. As we approached closer to our state, the road got narrower and thinner. Dad had to take cautious control of his steering.
“What’s wrong. Aren’t you happy” Dad said suddenly.
Momentarily I was shook off. I was laden with thoughts at that moment. Roughly I could hear Dad said something to me.
“Yeah! I’m absolutely happy” I responded.
The darkness began to crawl in. We were in the middle of a silent road. I knew Mom must be eagerly waiting at home. I looked at my wrist watch, it was 7:00pm by now. I was very much like a silent soul, who never had any idea to talk on returning home. So was my Dad’s nature. He had been always very cool and calm person all through his life. I always appreciated my Dad. I always had on my mind, someday I’ll make him proud and he will be my proud Father. We were running through the densely forest area. On both sides of the road there were hills covered with densely populated forest and the single line road on which we were on. Besides the cold weather froze us inside, even though all the car’s window was closed. I could calculate the time on my head, we had to drive for one more hour from now. I roughly could forecast by 8:00pm I would be at home. And the very first thing I would do, was to touch my Mom’s feet. That was one culture which I was taught since I was five years old. It’s a one way to show respect and love to elders, on return we are blessed by them. I was still staring outside the window. I turned to look at my Dad.
“Dad, this winter I want to do something new” I said softly.
Again we initiated to talk.
“Something new like”.
“Something that’s really beneficial”.
“I would suggest you to study first” Dad controlling the steering wheel, giving a fraction of glance at me.
“Off course Dad, I’ll maintain my academic carrier, but other half of my life it needs something new to be done”.
“Well, I only want good of you Son. It’s your life, you frame it”.
I crouched out my body from leaning position and stretched my hand to push the button on the music player. Turned the volume slightly low, as we were in conversation. Dad had a great interest in music, he even recorded his own songs few years back.
“Definitely Dad, I’ll make you proud”.
“Make me proud, Son” he replied.
The music gave a soothing pleasure to sustain the conversation between us. Above all it took away the boredom that was lasting for more than hours.
“Dad, Why don’t you try singing again”. He laughed for seconds.
“Well, that was when I was at your age Son. But, Now I have to manage new era of life” he said looking at me.
“Oh! C’mon Dad. I know you were a good Singer, Singing has always been your passion” my tone urged strongly.
He gave a sharp soft look again.
“Well, you be first something and then I would look after that too” he passed a smiled.
“So, what’s the new thing you wanted to do” he raised his question.
“Oh! I thought of writing a Novel” changing the track of the music system.
“That’s a brilliant Idea”.
“I guess it will work”.
“It will Son”.
We were very close to reach. I wanted to let know Anannya that I have safely reached home. I typed few words on my mobile and send it to her. Finally, Dad blew the horn and we were welcomed back home warmly. The gate was open wide for us to get in. And like every time, I first met my Mom and touched her feet.
Twenty Three
.............................
I closed my dairy for a while to stop writing. I decided to make a call to Isha. Indeed, I was in a state of boredom travelling for hours in a single bus. This time I had taken the morning bus, so it’s obvious I would be reaching Goa by the night time or the next morning. I had no exact idea about that. I dialled her number and gave a call to her. The seat beside was still left empty. But, that was quiet good enough to occupy one complete seat alone. The call gave a ring on her mobile, I could hear it faintly in my ears. I waited for seconds to accept the call.
“Hey” said Isha softly.
The only first thing that I could ask her was about her condition.
“How have you been?”.
“Absolutely fine” she said faintly.
I knew she would be waiting for me. Indeed the only companion she got was me and her.
“You seemed to be strangled with something” I intended to know.
“Yeah! I was quiet busy with my thesis and most of all I had been missing you” her voice shook softly.
“Everything will be fine............” as my tone tried to console her.
“Did you made a contact to your Mom”.
“Yeah!...She said...she’s fine. She’s just waiting for my return”.
“That’s absolutely good”.
“I would come to pick you up at the station” she said.
“Yeah! sure”.
We hanged the phone out with little more conversation. I resumed back the phone to the place where it was. I slid my window wide and peeped outside. The highway ran smooth, and I could only watch the other vehicles being crossed by our bus. I was still having the diary on my lap. It laid closed, neither was I in mood to continue with my story. Inside everything stood silence, some went off to sleep, some still with their eyes open. And I was like what to choose. Neither my eyes would close nor I could see others sleeping. I would say, I was fortunate enough that no one had occupied the seat beside me. I leaned my back at the back support of my seat. And began to chase the narrow view out of the window. I was fiddling my hand with the pen I was holding. Decided to flip a page from the diary and thought of reading a page that I had written earlier. As I went through the first page of my own written words, some nostalgic memories flashed back into my mind. I began to think about Anannya. I had no idea now where she must have been. What would she be doing. Would she even remember me, I knew not about her mind. I couldn’t read more than a page out of my own diary, I instantly closed it and held it on my lap with my left hand on it. I
could only endure the long hours journey until I would reach to Isha. Apparently, I was exhausted by now. I really had very tired some journey for the past few weeks until I met Isha in Mumbai. The Bus was still on its highway running smoothly, and I was completely immersed into silent world. I could only give short glance at my wrist watch waiting for the time to pass as quick as possible. I closed my eyes at last, my back being supported gently at the back support. I realized I should take little rest. I gave one last glimpse at my watch. It showed 3:00pm. With that time on my mind I went on for a nap, resting my head gently.
Life had always been a hard time for me. Everything that I wanted never had an easy access to me. In many cases, I failed while chasing my dreams but I never let myself to give up. Every hope and believe kept me alive with my dreams which I cornered somewhere on my mind to achieve someday. I knew now I had lost someone for the first time in life. A soul whom I would never be able to pay my humble gratitude even though I give my whole life. Someone whom I admired more than I could ever do, I really adore her for what she was. With the passage of time, I’ve finally learnt to stay with the scars. Her image never failed to reflect before my eyes. I treasured her in my heart, in every beat a name I’ll always a remember, Anannya. How love would change my life I never thought it earlier. Even though I lost her, I still feel her closeness around me. Things began to inculcate in different way into my world. I couldn’t respond my heart to any other except for her. I knew I wouldn’t be able to love one more girl, no matter even if she would be much better than her. I always thought of giving meaning to it, which is why I had been penning down in cordial touch of love for her. I knew my diary would be full writing about her, a final touch of my love would stay forever on this mother earth. Would she ever know the thing or would it go waste without letting her know, I had no visualization about that. It’s all I wanted to pay her my most respectful and humble gratitude before her hand. Certain things I began to pertain on my own knowing that my life has become an empty vessel now. I did used to feel the brim of happiness when she used to be mine. But, now I need a long rest of my soul to overcome the grief of such hindrance of my life.
I wasn’t much known to the outside world. I had always stayed away from the limelight, which people of today’s world doesn’t dreams. The glamour and fashion of my life had taken a sudden turn which was no more glamorous. I felt like I had been categorize in old fashion world. But, I never paid attention to that, as I had no one now beside me who would ask me to look good with my face. I was laid closed with my eyes in my seat. Waiting for more than an hour to reach the destination. I could say that moment, I was very keen to see Isha. I wouldn’t wait no more than to land my feet before her. Gradually, the time had gone out. I could somehow take a note of the time. The Sun had sets its bright light, right below the horizon, and the shadow got lengthen. I could watch out the lengthen shadow of our bus casting out on the turf on the highway. It’s the beginning of silent night, taking a glance of my wrist watch again. So, by 6:30pm I was active again, out of that drowsy sleep. I haven’t said Isha yet about the incident I had while returning back. I thought I would make it a fairy tale before I could let her know. I know she wouldn’t believe me that I was kidnapped.
I was so compact with my seat, it made me feel like I couldn’t even share a gentle movement of my body. So, compactly I was tightened into my place, that it began to give me slight hint of pain on my back. I just waited the time to come patiently until I would get down. The last three hours had passed in severe suffocation of my body bearing the whole lot of pain that began to crap in. While somehow I could shift my body and make a gentle movement. I stretched my arm to refresh myself to gain the strength all over again. So, closed to the destination we were heading towards the bus stoppage. Almost into city where I was suppose to land after enduring the long route.
Finally, I was into the capital city of Goa, Panaji. I managed to clip out my baggage from where I had settled it. Stood in queue along with the others until I could slide out my feet to touch the ground. I took my step out of the staircase of the Bus door, and gently could land my first feet touching the ground and the next followed. I walked out from the crowded area and started to look for Isha. I was searching for a slight hint about her presence. After few minutes search I could see her appearance gleaming before my eyes. I really loved the night sky that Day. She was on the other side of the station, but had come to search like the way I had been.
“Hey” she waved her hand as she walked closer towards me.
I passed a smile at the beginning, then waved her back.
“I had been waiting on the other side” she said as her voice seemed quiet exhausted.
As soon as her steps got closer to me, she gave me a warm embrace. I gentle curled one of my hand at her back while the other I had bag gripping on it. She looked at me for seconds and muttered out.
“You must be tired”.
“Yeah! I had a long session of silence” I uttered.
She peeked and smile. We were walking out of the station gate by now. Had to hire one taxi to reach the hotel where Isha had been staying the days. She had managed to booked a single room for me before hand. We caught up a taxi and headed towards the hotel. It’s been just a week I was away from her and now once again I added up into her life. I had no pre thought idea what would I feel when she would be leaving for Houston. Naturally it seemed we began to get closer to each other within no time since we met each other. I was sitting next to her inside. The window on her side was wide open. There came a rush of air which blew her hair abruptly.
I could see say inside me that moment, I really liked the smell of her hair. In course of time interval she did used to turn her face with short glance at me. I could pass only a brief smile to her. We were on the speeding taxi. Within fraction of few minutes we were standing into the porch of the hotel. Walked together to get into the main entrance. She pushed the main door and our steps added together to the reception hall. I was walking alongside her. She was holding my hand. I could feel the warmth of her palm after a week. Finally, we were before the receptionist. He greeted us welcome. Isha opted for her room key. So was I handed with mine. We shuffled towards the elevator.
“So, how far have you reached with your diary” Isha said.
“Well, yet to reach the end”.
“I’m eagerly waiting for the final end of it”.
“Yeah! I would definitely let you know the first”.
“What’s about your thesis” I intended to know.
“It’s going well and it’s wonderful”.
“ You know I’m really lucky I met you” I said.
“I just don’t know how to thank you actually” said Isha, as she pressed the elevator button.
We slid into the elevator and ascended into the upper floors of the hotel building. The elevator halted at the number of our floor. The door opened wide side wards. Took my first step out of the elevator and opened a room for her. She followed out behind me. The time elapsed out. I took a short glance to know, it’s 11:00pm. Before we departed for the night, I just handed her a book. Of course it was Novel. Isha had a great interest in reading Novel. I still do not remember the name of the book. It was wholly wrapped with a beautiful cover page.
“What’s this” she asked.
“Something I thought of giving you” being humble in my tone.
She accepted it from my hand.
“Thanks” she said.
I just nodded my head and marched forward bidding her good night. She gave a sweet gesture and passed a smile. I walked off towards my room. I had no knowledge where my life had been taking me. It’s the few moments that began to create a new thing into my new world. Earlier I felt like I was a loser. When the light of my life began to shone once again, here I was standing in an open door room watching the crescent moon out of my window. On the other half, Anannya still hovered in my mind as a dream of past. A creation of my mind led me to write a book for her. And here on my diary
with thousand words that were untold. I stood in silence beside the window viewing the dark nature. Besides, the gentle breeze came in through the window. I have no idea what Anannya must be doing right now, where she may be. I understand I lost the right to know all these things long ago. But one thing I really knew, she will be remembered forever in my life.
Isha scheduled the next day to visit some places which were indeed unknown to me. I passed that night in slow emotions and feelings. Whether to think from mind or from heart, I stood in state of dilemma. But, somehow the crescent moon helped me to get good tight sleep. That night I avoided to pen down on my diary. I thought about Peter that day. The only good friend I had. He knew everything what I had been going through into my life. Yes, it was a vice versa too. Perhaps a friend of such nature I wouldn’t even get a chance to meet again in my life. A Man of honour and respect is what he belonged of such category. I always had a separate outlook for him. A Man who taught me how to live a life with struggle, knowing the truth that he too had various equations of problems in his life. But, I could surely notice before my eyes, we were the best buddies.
It’s the month of spring, roughly I could remember the date, 10th March 2011. Isha was holding the Novel which I gifted her the night before. According to her scheduled plan we were in a beach. Well, I had never been in a Goa beach before. It’s the first time. Our feet stepped together through the shoreline. The sandy beach had a wonderful view of the deep blue line Arabian ocean. People say it’s one of the most exotic place one can ever feel. We were in Wagah beach. I never knew Isha was a party holistic girl too. As per I knew the beach had an access to all ages of people. In most of all I could see foreign tourist from overseas Nations. We were sliding through the line shore, and our steps added together. So small our steps were, that it made even the distance larger with no end where we were supposed to halt. I was holding bag at my back. I carried nothing more than a diary and pen in it.
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