When he was gone, I turned to look at my mother. She was still weeping quietly, but she wasn't hysterical about it anymore. Yet again, I was amazed how David had so deftly handled an emotionally charged situation. It made me long to see him at work. I imagined he would be amazing to watch as he worked with his patients.
"Mom?" I whispered as I scooted closer to her. "I'm sorry." I felt my emotions welling up inside me again, and I had to rein it in. I didn't want to set Mom off again.
She finally met my eyes with a sad expression. "So am I, baby." She reached over and took my hand. Her touch was warm and comforting. "I know I'm overprotective and too emotionally involved with my children. I know it stresses both of you out, but...but I can't seem to help it. I love you both so much. I want nothing but the best for both of you." She let out soft sob. "I'm afraid that someday, I'll push both of you away forever, just like your father." More tears sheeted down her face.
"Mom," I said sympathetically and pulled her into a hug.
"That's why I try to hold on to you so tight." She sobbed out. "I don't want to lose my babies like I lost everything else." She buried her face into my neck, her sobs becoming harder as she shuddered and shook in my arms.
That was when I realized with a sudden twist of pain in my heart, that she was still in love with Dad, even after all these years. She had never really dated anyone since, and I thought it was because she was jaded with relationships in general. Now I knew better, and it broke my heart. Not only had she lost her parents at a young age, but she had lost Dad, the man she had kept loving all this time, yet couldn't have. No wonder she couldn't handle it when he brought his girlfriends around. My poor Mom. Suddenly, her clingy and emotional reacts over the years made perfect sense to me.
"I forgive you, Mom," I sobbed out. "It's okay. I love you, and nothing you do or say will ever chase me away. I promise. And Ford feels the same way. You're our mother. We wouldn't be the people we are today, if wasn't for you."
"I forgive you too, baby," she leaned back to meet my eyes again. She cradled my face gently in her hands. "I know what's like to be pregnant for the first time and to be terrified of all of it. If you ever want to talk about it, all you have to do is ask. I'll help you any way that I can. You know that."
"I'm so scared, Mom," I whispered as I started trembling. "What if I can't be a good mother? What if I let David and our baby down?"
"Baby," she murmured reassuringly. "That man adores you. I don't think you could do anything to let him down. As for your baby, you are a strong independent woman. You can handle anything life throws at you. That's why I'm so proud of you. You'll be a great mother. I just know it."
"Really?"
"Really," she said, her voice warm and comforting. I managed to smile through my tears, her words and unwavering belief in me exactly what I needed right now. I started sobbing again, but this time with cathartic relief.
"I love you, Mom," I snuffled out.
"I love you too, baby." She pulled me into her arms, resting my head on her shoulder.
For the first time in weeks, I started to feel more like myself. My mother's and David's belief in me finally started to sink in. Even though I knew I would still continue to struggle with this, I wasn't alone. I had my family, which included David now, to help me keep my head above water when I felt overwhelmed. I felt some of the fear begin to slip away, and hope and anticipation for this baby, and my future with David, filled up my heart and took its place.
Chapter Ten
David
My phone started ringing just as I finished stretching after my run on the treadmill Sunday morning. I saw my mother's name on the screen and answered it absently as I wiped the sweat off my forehead with a towel.
"Hi, Mom," I said, still breathing a little heavy from my workout.
"Hi, sweetheart," she said warmly. "I hope I didn't interrupt your run."
"No," I reassured her. "I just finished. What's up?"
"I was wondering if you could pick up a few things on your way here today. I spaced it at the store yesterday and don't really feel like going back this morning."
Shit. I had been going through so much personal crap this last week that I forgot about lunch at Mom's today. So much for avoiding Diana. I hadn't really planned on seeing my sister yet. I was still too confused and hurt about the whole Dad situation. A small part of me was thinking that talking to the guy might be a good idea, but the rest of me just wanted to wash my hands of the whole thing. As for my sister, I was really worried about the future of our relationship, and it made me sad. I wondered how Mom would respond when she found out what Diana had done. I wondered how she would feel about it. I didn't bring it up though. I didn't want to drop a bomb like this on her over the phone.
"Just text me what you need, Mom. Natalie and I will take care of it."
"Oh good," she said, and I could hear the smile in her voice. "I was hoping that you would bring her."
"We're kind of a package deal now, Mom," I said with a wide smile of my own.
"So things are pretty serious with her then?" Mom asked in a leading way, obviously eager for some details. For once, I was more than willing to give them to her.
"Yeah, it is. She's the love of my life."
"I'm so happy to hear that," she said sincerely. "You've been alone and unhappy for a long time. You deserve someone special like Natalie. She adores you. I can see it every time she looks at you."
"I'm a very lucky man." I was even more lucky than Mom knew, and I wondered how she would take the news about the baby today. I was actually looking forward to telling everyone. Especially now that Natalie and I were okay again. "What time are we eating?" I asked before I blurted out that Natalie was pregnant over the phone in my excitement.
"Probably around one," she said. "But your sister is planning on being here at noon. So anytime after that is fine." Mention of my sister instantly dampened my excitement. It was going to be a long afternoon.
"We'll be there. I love you."
"I love you too, sweetheart. Bye."
"Bye, Mom."
I headed down the hall to my room, smiling at Natalie's sleeping form in my bed, despite my worry over how today would go. I undressed and went into the bathroom. I got in the shower and spent the whole time wondering how I was going to handle seeing my sister today. The only solution that seemed viable was pretending that nothing had happened between us. I really didn't want to get into it with her at Mom's house or worry Mom about it. Whether Diana would cooperate with my plan remained to be seen. I wasn't holding out much hope for that though. When I came out of the bathroom, Natalie was sitting up in bed and taking the nausea medication I sat out for her on the nightstand when I got up this morning.
"Good morning, my love," she said with a wan smile. I could tell from the set of her eyes that she wasn't feeling well again. Worry for her roiled through me. I'd be so relieved when the morning sickness finally went away. Her fall the other day scared the shit out of me, and to be honest with myself; I was probably going to be a worried mess until the baby was born.
"Good morning, sweetheart," I murmured softly as I went to her and leaned down to kiss her temple. "Feeling sick again this morning?"
"Yeah," she grumbled. "But it's better than yesterday."
"Good." I went to my dresser to grab some underwear. I didn't miss the heated way Natalie's eyes traveled up and down my body. "Mom called a bit ago. I forgot that she's having the family over for lunch today. I hope you don't mind."
"I'd love to do that," she said with a smile. "I love your family."
"I thought we could tell them about the baby today. Is that okay?"
Her smile turned wry as she nodded. "Baba already knows, though."
"What?" I asked incredulously. "When did you tell her?"
"I didn't. She took one look at me and figured it out for herself on Thanksgiving."
I snorted out a laugh. "That woman astounds me. It's like she reads minds or something."
&
nbsp; "Right?" Natalie laughed as she climbed off the bed. "She promised not to tell anyone else until we were ready." She walked up to me, and my eyes slid down to her gorgeous bare breasts. She pressed her naked body against mine and put her arms around my neck. She sighed softly and buried her face into the left side of my neck, nuzzling her nose against me. "I'm looking forward to telling everyone that I'm carrying your baby, David," she whispered into my skin.
I shivered from her words just as much as her lips touching me. I dropped my clean boxer briefs on the floor with a groan and scooped her up into my arms.
"What are you doing?" she said with a smile.
"I think I need another shower."
Her throaty answering laughter turned me on even more as I carried her into the bathroom. We didn't come out again for quite a long time.
Several hours later, we had just left the grocery store and were on our way to my mother's house. I looked over to see Natalie fidgeting nervously in the passenger seat of my Audi. I guess her excitement was quickly being replaced by anxiety. I reached over and grabbed her hand.
"It's going to be fine, Natalie." I kept my voice calm and reassuring. "My family loves you. They'll be thrilled to get two new family members."
"Two?" she asked with a perplexed expression.
"You know, you and the baby." I squeezed her fingers reassuringly. That managed to coax a smile out of her that faded quickly.
"I am nervous about telling them that I'm pregnant, but I'm also worried about you."
"Me?" I glanced over in confusion.
"You haven't talked to Diana in almost a week," she said with concern. "What are you going to say to her today?"
"As little as possible," I grumbled out, not really wanting to talk about this subject. I hadn't figured out how to handle it yet, but I wanted to share with Natalie. We'd spent far too much time not communicating lately, and I wasn't going to risk our relationship by keeping things to myself again.
"David." She placed her other hand on top of our clasped ones. "What are you going to do? Avoid your sister for the rest of your life?"
I let out a deep sigh. "No, of course not. I just don't know what to do about this situation. I'm still hurt and angry with my sister. I don't know how I feel about my dad. Do I meet the guy? Do I just let it go? Will I end up regretting it either way?" My hand tightened on Natalie's as sorrow fell over me. "What if my relationship with Diana is never the same after this?" Family was everything to me, it always had been. My sister and I had always been tight, and we had been there for each other our whole lives. I couldn't fathom not having that anymore.
"I can't imagine Diana or you letting that happen."
I didn't respond because I wasn't so sure about that. Fortunately, Natalie didn't push me to continue talking about it, which I was grateful for. We drove in comfortable silence for a few minutes before she spoke again.
"Do you want a boy or a girl?" Her question threw me completely off guard.
I snorted out a laugh. "I haven't even thought about that yet. I guess I'm still wrapping my head around you just being pregnant." I thought about it for a moment before answering her. "I just want a healthy baby, but I guess if I had to choose, I'd want a boy. I spent my whole childhood surrounded by girls. It would be nice not to be the only male in the house for once in my life."
"I think I want a boy too," she said softly. I glanced over to see a warm smile flow across her perfect lips. "I like the idea of another little you wandering around in the world. Although, I'd be perfectly fine with a girl too. Like you said, I just want a healthy baby."
"Do we want to find out the gender before the baby is born?"
"Hell yeah," she blurted out then glared at me. "And don't you dare try to pull any of your delayed gratification shit on me about this."
"Don't worry, sweetheart," I smiled widely at her. "This is one instance where I have no desire for any of that."
"Thank God," she sighed out and visibly relaxed. "Waiting for that would have sent me off the deep end."
Since we were talking about the baby, I decided it was time to start feeling her out about moving in with me.
"I guess we'll be redecorating my guest bedroom soon, huh?" I asked. "That should be fun. I figure that's the best room for the baby since it's across the hall from ours." I watched her out of the corner of my eye as she pursed her lips. Tension tightened the skin around her eyes.
"Natalie?" I laced my fingers in hers. "I know that you're scared, but I would really like you to move in with me before the baby is born. I...I want to take care of you and be there for you. I want to hold you and rest my hand on your belly every night."
She looked at me as her face softened. "I'd like that too, but I just need more time. Okay?"
"Okay, sweetheart. Take all the time you need." I lifted her hand and brought it to my lips, kissing the back of it softly.
I was happy that it wasn't an outright no, and even though I wanted her living with me as soon as possible, I didn't want to push too hard and freak her out. I could be patient, even if the delayed gratification wasn't my idea for once. I would bide my time, give her the space to adjust to the idea, while deftly arguing my case whenever the situation presented itself. Wisely, I didn't mention any of that to her. I hoped that she would come around sooner than later, because my home wasn't home without her in it anymore.
***********
"We're here!" I called out as I led Natalie by the hand into the living room of Joe and Mom's house. We were immediately greeted by the sound of screaming as T.J. and Michael, my nephews, launched themselves at us at a run.
"Uncle David!" T. J., the five-year-old, cried out as he slammed into my legs. I picked him up with a grin.
"Nat-lee!" Three-year-old Michael yelled as he stopped in front of Natalie. He reached up to her as he jumped up and down excitedly.
A bemused smile spread across Natalie beautiful face as she scooped him up and balanced him on her hip. Michael grabbed some of Natalie's hair in his hands with a wide smile. One of Natalie's brows arched meaningfully.
"Don't you dare pull on my hair, young man," she said sternly as she eyed him pointedly. Michael immediately let go of her hair and smiled at her. I stared at her in awe. I'd never been able to get Michael to listen like that.
"Nat-lee, you hafta be old to have a fuzzy face like Unca David," he said as he patted her cheeks gently.
"Oh yeah?" she asked in amusement as she looked over at me with a wicked smile.
Michael nodded and continued insulting me. "Unca David is old."
"Yeah, really old," T.J. chimed in as he looked at Natalie and his brother with a wide smile. "Grandpa Joe doesn't even have a beard."
"Hey," I grumbled as I frowned at T.J., who looked entirely too amused with himself while the three of them laughed at me.
"Alright," Tony said wryly as he approached us. "I think you boys have picked on Uncle David enough."
"I don't know, Tony," Natalie said with a huge grin. "I think the boys are hilarious."
"True," Tony said as he nodded at Natalie. "But David is very sensitive and blubbering isn't very manly." He looked at me and winked as he took Michael from Natalie. "Even if he is old."
"And here I thought they got it from their mother." I shook my head in mock disgust as I set T.J. back on the floor. "It was you all along."
"I think your sister just rubbed off on me," he said with a shrug.
A sudden feeling of sadness came over me at the mention of my sister. That was when I noticed Diana come in from the kitchen holding Maria in her arms. She stopped when I met her eyes, and the pain and anger spiked inside me. It must have shown on my face because her eyes widened in discomfort. She turned around and disappeared back into the kitchen.
I let out a harsh sigh, then noticed Tony giving me a sympathetic expression. I shrugged at him, not knowing what to say. I wasn't surprised that he knew what was going on between his wife and me. Fortunately, Tony had always stayed out of any disagreemen
t Diana and I had. Of course, nothing quite like this had ever happened before. I was at a loss as to what to do about it. Tony nodded at me with a wan smile as he grabbed T.J.'s hand then led the boys out of the room.
Just then, Baba walked in from the kitchen and spied Natalie across the room. Her eyes widened and lit up with happiness.
"Natalie, kokhana," she called out as she crossed the room. When had she started calling Natalie sweetheart in Ukrainian? I noticed Baba's eyes flash down to Natalie's belly for a second before giving her a warm embrace. Natalie grinned widely at me over Baba's shoulder as she hugged my grandmother tightly.
"I missed you, Baba," Natalie murmured softly.
Baba took a step back and took Natalie's hands. "I missed you too, kokhana. It's good to see you again." She eyed Natalie's tall frame with concern. "Have you lost weight, kokhana?"
"A little, but I'm okay, Baba," Natalie said just loud enough for the three of us to hear. "I've been nauseous a lot, but it's better now that I have medication for it."
"Good," she glanced at me and released one of Natalie's hands to take one of mine. "I'm so happy for both of you," she whispered to us, her eyes glittering with emotion.
"Thanks, Baba," I told her with a warm smile as I squeezed her hand. "We're telling everyone today."
"Your mother will be so happy," Baba said with a pleased expression. "I can't wait to see her face when you tell her."
"Well, there's no time like the present," I glanced at Natalie. "Want to do it right now, sweetheart?"
"Yeah," she said. "I'm nervous and I want to get it out of the way."
"No need to be nervous, kokhana." Baba said reassuringly. "We're all family here." She patted Natalie's cheek comfortingly. "Everyone is in the family room, but Aleta. We can grab her on the way through the kitchen." Baba led Natalie by the hand, and I followed them into the kitchen with a smile as Baba fussed over her. I paused as they went ahead into the family room.
Mom was standing by the stove working on whatever we were having for lunch. It smelled wonderful.
You Are My Life: Breathless Book 3 Page 19