I dove onto the tank with Elaine, some of my strength returning to me. I had just a bit of borrowed magic left but nowhere near my normal levels. She exchanged a hesitant nod with me, and I winced at the fear in her eyes. It wasn't fear of the enemy, or for her own life, it was a fear of me.
Then she started hacking at the door with her blade that seemed as unbreakable as Anadele. We braced ourselves as the tank started backing up rapidly as the gun swung toward our allies. The beast belching giant plumes of blueish black smoke that was cloying and acrid as we backed through it.
I looked down at the long band of metal plates on each side of the conveyance rolled past, that was its form of locomotion. I looked at my friends battling valiantly then the metal plates. I counted as I measured the timing then powered my blade and thrust forward between two plates. I could feel the links connecting the plates sever, and then we were almost violently turning as the wheels under the plates spun freely, and the other set of plates dug in deep.
I repeated the action there. Good Bowyn and Verna were safe now. Then my heart fell when the gun started pivoting. They would be able to fire upon them anyway. I looked at the firing tube, then my hands and Anadele. I screamed out a raspy challenge, thrust forward with all my might and Anadele sank through the tempered steel, blocking the opening at the end.
I dove at Elaine and tackled her off the vehicle and pulled her to the back of it as they fired. The tank went up on one set of wheels as it was almost tipped over by the force of the blast as the metal tube split and bulged and splintered its entire length. Smoke billowed from inside the tank, and it was silent.
Elaineia looked at the tank, then at me, her eyes wide. A part of me mourned as I looked at the smoking wreckage. I knew this was my time, but it saddened me that Anadele had to pay the price as well. Maybe it was better this way.
I panted for a moment, then steeled myself, and took a deep breath as I stood and drew Hera. Verna and Bowyn were still engaged, and this was no time to feel sorry for myself. I rasped out a challenge then charged, my bare feet getting cut on the debris of the tanks as I ran.
I pushed myself ahead in time, and I could see the shaky ghostly apparition run ahead. Twice I died after a tank blast when I saw Bowyn in danger. A woman standing up from hiding with a long gun pointed his way. I staggered in front of her and died as she fired no matter how I tried to change my decisions.
I lurched to the side at the pain I was accumulating form each foray a few seconds into the future. But I ran out of time as fire, fury, and a wave of pain struck me as the fourth tank targeted me. As I tumbled through the air, my ears ringing again, and so much pain that I had shut it off, I whispered to the universe, “I love you, Celeste. I love you Misty. I'm sorry.”
Then I was hitting the ground in a tumbling roll. I held onto Hera desperately. I would die with a blade in my hands! I staggered to my feet as my vision cleared. It was as if the entire world had slowed down around me. As my focus returned, I saw the Avalon woman raising her weapon as I staggered in front of her. A detached portion of my mind saw the Condor hanging in the sky over her shoulder, still so very far away.
No choices I could have made would change this final moment if I wanted to protect the Cristea, protect my friends. I did good in this life, hadn't I? But did the good outweigh this heavy chain of sin I wore? I hoped so. I started to close my eyes as she started to pull the lever with her finger that would send the lead to take me from this world. I was still too stunned from the tank blast to try to catch it.
That is when the cold reality of just how unjust life was, reared its ugly head. Maybe no choice I could make could change the outcome, but the choices of others could. Just as I saw the flash of flame growing in the gun, a body struck my side, sending me tumbling to the ground as the sharp crack of the gun sounded.
I tumbled to my feet, the scream of denial stuck in my throat as Sir Bowyn, Knight of Wexbury, fell to the ground. I stared as blood gushed from his breastplate and screamed the scream that wouldn't come. And I did the one thing I swore to myself and to all others that I would never do again. With all the last of the borrowed magik, reached out and in an instant tore all the iron from the blood of the woman as I shrieked at her.
As the red mist dissipated while she fell to the ground gasping for air that her blood could no longer use, I ran and slid beside Bowyn. Pulling his head into my lap, stroking his hair desperately as he looked at me, trying to focus as I kept repeating, “You're going to be ok, you're going to be ok.”
He asked in a confused voice, “Laney?”
I nodded, my tears dripping down on his face. “Yes... I'm here Bowyn.”
One of his hands drifted to his wound, blood pumping out with each beat of his heart. “I think I done fucked myself up.” He tried to smile but started coughing blood instead, the copper scent of it lingering in the air, mixed with the smoke and sulfur of the field of battle.
I pulled him tighter to me babbling in my desperation, “You're going to be ok? You hear me?”
He shook his head then his face took on the look of a terrified child as he asked, “Was I a good man?”
I kept nodding as I tried to focus through the tears. It was supposed to be me. It was supposed to be me! If there was a god, I hated him because it was supposed to be me, not Bowyn! I nodded again and rasped out, my voice hoarser than normal, “Yes, yes you were. And you are loved. You will be remembered.”
He smiled wistfully at that as he stared off into space, his last words were barely a whisper, “Tell Rain, I'm sorry.”
Then my friend was still as I screamed my own denial. I was only peripherally aware of Verna sliding in beside me, her voice sounded like it was echoing at the end of a long corridor as she was shouting, “Bowyn?”
I moved his head to her lap as I grasped Hera and stood. I started walking toward the last tank. That oddly detached portion part of me had me absently reaching my blade out to impale the Avalon woman gasping for air on the ground, ending her misery as I passed. Why did she deserve mercy?
I pulled power from somewhere so deep inside it scared me. It tasted of a hate and a rage I had never known myself capable of. And I deflected an incoming round with this dark power that tasted of acid and ash as I started to quicken my pace, my feet pounding the ground in time with my thudding heart. Avalon was going to pay, each and every one of them, I was going to...
A great shadow swept over me, swallowing the sun, and I looked up to see the Outrider streaking down toward us at her top speed. Bex was sliding down a rope behind her and being dragged along the ground, he tumbled then came up running toward us, drawing his blade. The fire of Wexbury burned in his eyes.
I was barely able to turn my head back toward the tank in time to see the Outrider, Bex's ultimate accomplishment in life, plowing into the ground and the remaining tank. The dirigible's massive airframe pummeling the conveyance, and in a great explosion of flame an fury that sent us flying to the ground from the ensuing shockwave, both it and the tank were gone, to be replaced by a raging inferno.
We had taken the field... but at what cost?
Looking back, I think I remember Bex calling out my name. Verna telling him to stay back as I stood there alone while I watched the flames which had engulfed the last of our enemy, taking the only ones I could expend this new fury which was consuming my soul on. And I hated that they had turned me into something I am not. I just held Hera, feeling helpless, and I roared my pain.
In the end victorious she,
one Great Mother in a blood-red sea.
Chapter 21 – Goodbyes
I don't know how long I stood there, watching the flames die down, until the love I didn't deserve was beside me, lending her strength. Allowing me to find the lost pieces of myself and pull them back to me.
“Laney...”
I burrowed my head into her shoulder and let the wracking sobs finally take me. I was so numb.
It wasn't until she found me some boots and we had started the
long walk back to Aratreya that the biggest part of this tragedy hit me. Rain was going to be devastated. She had finally unchained her heart and let someone in, and the one who held it for her had died in my stead.
I looked up at Celeste finally seeking her forgiveness as I said in a whispering voice, “I'm sorry. It was supposed to be me.”
She shook her head and said lovingly, “No. Don't take this from him.” He had been her partner and friend ever since she had become a knight, the only soul closer to my Lady was Verna. And our muscular friend carried Bowyn's body back to Aratreya with us on foot, the entire distance.
His voice would now join the others in the Whispering Walls range. I wanted to believe that, since I didn't believe in any of the gods. Maybe I was more Gypsy than I knew now.
I was in shock, and Celeste sat with me for hours in a back room in Journey's End as the Falcon was recalled after securing the enemy base, capturing the two men left to guard it. The people of Aratreya celebrated even as the dead were brought in from the field of battle.
The two airships were tasked with returning the Cristea from the north caves back to Aratreya.
It was Misty who finally broke through my sorrow. Between the Condor and Falcon, they were able to ferry all the children and our healer from the caves in one trip before going back for the others.
As Sylvia went to work on Verna and the other injured, Misty and Ingr came running into the room and threw themselves on me. “Mom! You're hurt.”
As she hugged me tightly, I pulled her to me, not wanting to ever let go. And then I felt sheets of calm warmth drape over me. They weren't as heavy and well layered as Sylvia's, as the magic was half-formed... but Ingr was healing my injuries. I didn't even feel them because I was still so numb to the world.
But like some sort of light in the darkness as I contemplated what my thoughts had been just before Bex took my revenge from me, stopping me from going... from going rogue... Misty was there. She reminded me that I was not defined by a moment of weakness and rage, I was defined by those who chose to love me and those who I chose to love.
I came back to myself and beamed at my girl, I had to be strong for her. “Did you keep the children in line while you were gone?”
She took a step away from me and stood straight and saluted. Bitsy poked her head out from Misty's collar by her left ear and scurried up her arm. “The Cristea Junior Regiment performed admirably, my Sora. Keeping the elderly calm and helping to keep them comfortable.”
I smiled despite myself and asked, “Mischief?”
She nodded and shot me a toothy grin.
With an exasperated sigh and a resigned tone which sounded so much like her mother's, Ingr said, “Oh, there was mischief... lots of mischief. Sometimes I think that girl has no sense in her head.”
I snorted and covered my mouth in embarrassment over the outburst. Ingr had just appropriated one of her mother's favorite lines when it came to the girls – and she did it well.
Misty stuck her tongue out at the gypsy girl, and they shared a smile.
I furrowed my brow when I saw the strain on Ingr's face, and I placed a hand on hers. “Thank you Ingr, I feel much better now. You should save yourself for someone in worse shape. You did good.” I worked my jaw as she nodded and beamed at the praise, the constant buzzing and ringing in my ears was gone. The girl truly was a wonder.
Misty furrowed her brow and asked, “Where is the Outrider? I didn't see her in the field.”
I shook my head in sad reflection and said simply in explanation, “Your uncle Bex is a Knight of Wexbury.”
Her eyes fell, and I could see the sadness of her understanding as she just nodded.
I looked at the girls, then swept them into another hug, giving each one their very own kiss on the top of the head. “Love you two bunches, now shoo, make sure the other kids stay out of trouble and...” I swallowed. “Away from the fallen.”
They were off like a shot, Misty stuffing Bitsy into her tunic pocket before grabbing Ingr's hand. I smiled fondly as I watched them go, grateful that they had pulled me out of the dark spiral I had been in.
Then my Lady Knight was accusing in a flat tone, “You saw your death in the visions,” it wan't a question.
I wouldn't meet her eyes. I could feel the cocktail of emotions swirling around inside her like a tangible specter hanging in the air. I had no answer for her because I could hear her own truth in her words, she had already known. But she respected me enough to not say anything. She had thought she was preventing my vision by leaving me behind in Aratreya. We had both withheld from each other... for love.
So I ignored it, looking toward where the girls had run off to and then blurted, “I wish to foster another child.”
She was silent a moment at the segue until I met her eyes, mine searching and hopeful. Then her worried and pensive face bloomed into a sardonic smile. “Oh you do, do you.” She bit the tip of her tongue almost playfully, looking relieved we weren't going to tackle the hard topics yet. “And I suppose you have someone in mind?”
I gushed, “If her parents are willing for us to foster, then yes. I met this adorable girl from Hell's Gate the other day...”
The look she gave me warmed me inside, even knowing what I had done on the field of battle, she could still look at me that way. I reached a hand out, and she took it, I smiled sadly. “I'm so sorry about Bowyn.” Then I saw the rare tears filling the eyes of the strongest woman I knew, and I loved her for that, that she felt safe with me enough to show them.
We embraced and just shared our closeness, each letting the other know that they were not alone as she shed tears for the passing of one of her oldest friends. After a few seconds, I could feel her gaining her control back as she straightened slightly then wiped her cheeks as she released me.
She assured me, “For those of us who chose this life, he died doing what was in his heart. Protecting those in need. And he knew, Laney, he knew you had not chosen this life and did what he was born to do. He loved you and died the hero he has always been.”
I shrugged as I nodded, refusing to cry yet again. “It still doesn't make it hurt any less.”
She shook her head slowly, eyes haunted as she opened a hand at her side, fingers splayed. “No. No, it doesn't.”
I took her hand, and she held on almost desperately as we headed through the winding passageways back to the heart of Journey's End to debrief with the others and plan. This was not the end. Far from it, it was but a lone spark in the darkness which would fuel a raging fire. Avalon would return, and it was up to us to decide just how to handle that.
It was odd, though everyone staunchly went about their business, it felt as if their full attention was upon Celeste and me. This proved out when we joined Corrine, and a healed Verna and Elaineia at the great table, and the hall went silent.
Celeste filled the rest of us in on the battle of Domed Mountain. As Bex had shared, when they arrived on the field, they were alone. An hour after the appointed time, Commander Stein arrived with only a small detachment of six men and how many ever there are in a tank. They feared an ambush at Aratreya so sent Bex to scout.
They had but the one tank and a scout transport, and all their knights were heavily armed with large guns on tripods and two of those dragon's breath weapons. When peace overtures to Avalon were refused, and Celeste's repeat of her challenge of single armed combat refused again.
Celeste returned to our people, and the battle began, the hovering Condor was hit by the first volley from the Tank. Luckily it was a glancing blow which tore off a section of armor plating, or she would have gone down right then.
Captain Thomas swung the airship down into a ravine as the tank tracked it. The second volley missed as the knights charged in staggered spacing as they would while under archer attack, spreading out the targets as the guns opened fire.
In the first seconds of the battle, twelve knights fell. But then Celeste reached the guns. She heard the tank taking another shot at the Co
ndor and called out to the rest. “Forty second reload!” She had counted between each shot to determine the window of attack.
Captain Thomas said from the other side of the table, “I've heard the stories, but I believed them exaggerated. But I doubt them no more as I saw the Harbinger of Wexbury descend upon the gunners like some sort of wraith from the windows of the Condor. She did something with her magic I've never seen done.”
He motioned with his hand in an arc following the memory with his eyes. “She somehow threw herself into a leap which spanned thirty yards.”
I nodded as people gasped, she had done that before, at the unveiling of the Outrider, when fouled anchor lines threatened tragedy, she had focussed her energy in a burst at the ground that sent her into the air from the counterforce.
He said in a growl of anticipated battle, “She landed rolling past the enemy who were firing madly at her as she sailed through the air, then she was sweeping her blade, and it cut through all those ungodly gun weapons.”
He shook his head. “While Celeste battled four alone, the men with the dragon magic started spewing flames at our other knights, keeping them at bay.” He chuckled. “It isn't wise to create large amounts of flame with a fire techno-knight in our midst. Lady Anne gathered the flames and exhausted herself in one great effort as she sent the flames back upon the Avalonians.”
He sighed. “I felt the explosion on the Condor when whatever magic they were using lost containment when the men burned.”
He chuckled, watching his memory play out in front of his eyes. “I lost track of what happened after that as I was busy flying a buffalo through a mouse house in the ravine, as we took more fire from the tank. By the time I emerged from it to try to get over the tank so it could not target us, it was over.”
He pointed at Celeste. “As we burst up from the ravine, I saw Lady Celeste, standing on the tank, her blade through its thick armor and through the chest of its driver.”
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