Hocus Pocus Baby
by Scarlett Cantrell
HOCUS POCUS BABY
Copyright © 2013 Scarlett Cantrell
Published by JAF Publications
The moral right of Scarlett Cantrell to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act, 1988.
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanic, including photocopy, recording, or any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher.
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, organizations, places and events are either the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or locales is entirely coincidental.
TABLE OF CONTENTS
Title Page
Rights and Permissions
Not Quite the Second Coming
Bad Habits
Just a Spoonful of Something
The Magic Baby
It's Your Fault!
Panthera Tigris
The Unwelcome Guest
A Step in the Wrong Direction
Repercussions
A Day of Firsts
A Note From the Author
House of Magic Blurb
Other Titles
Not Quite the Second Coming
A certain amount of respect and deference was shown to Magic Babies; it had been this way since time immemorial.
In the first three months of Megan's life people came from far and wide to see the Magic Baby. They came bearing gifts, praise and good will. And when they arrived they were subsequently turned away from the door by an angry Melissa, who had no desire to see her daughter made a spectacle of. People compared Megan's birth to the birth of Christ, but Melissa contemptuously reminded them that she didn't live in a stable!
For the first three months of the baby's life she never left the grounds of the Rowe estate. The only time she ever saw “strangers” was when Melissa allowed Janice and Keith to visit. Leanne grew weary of this type of behavior, and demanded that Melissa let her take their daughter out into the world.
'I'm putting my foot down!' Leanne said, crossing her arms defiantly and... putting her foot down. 'And I mean it this time.' She meant it every time, but that never stopped Melissa snorting and waving a dismissive hand her way.
'Absolutely not. I don't trust you to take out the trash let alone my daughter.' That was the truth. Whenever Leanne offered to take out the rubbish – to do her bit around the house – Melissa would snatch it from her, saying that she didn't want Leanne rummaging through her garbage!
'For God's sake, Melissa, it's just for half an hour. She needs to be around other people.'
She lowered her voice as she watched over the baby, who was fast asleep in her crib. Leanne's anger dissipated whenever she looked at Megan, still so small, her head full of wild, dark brown hair. She was beautiful – no denying it – but it was like staring at a tiny, peaceful version of Melissa. A reminder of that stupid night. A beautiful one, but a reminder nonetheless.
On this bright Saturday afternoon – which was perfect for a stroll – Melissa was putting away Megan's clothes.
'No, she doesn't,' Melissa said levelly, as she folded a babygro and tucked it into the drawer.
'I don't need your permission to take my own daughter out. When she wakes up, we're going.'
There were times, like these, that Leanne thought putting her foot down was a dangerous thing to do, because sometimes it garnered not a dismissive wave from Melissa, but silence. Leanne knew that the silence was deadly, and it would be only a matter of time before her dark-haired co-parent let rip.
She watched Melissa vigilantly through the corner of her eye, ready to run if the volatile woman came after her. And because she wasn't in the running away mood, she added, in an act of appeasement, 'You're welcome to join us.'
Melissa spun round with a look of pure contempt. She was about to tell Leanne just how deep her hate for her ran, when a gurgling, whimpering sound stopped her. Just in time. It was the same gurgling and whimpering that usually deterred their arguing.
Leanne reached into the crib and picked up the baby. She kissed her several times in the way of an apology, for yet again interrupting her sleep with their bickering. Megan began to cry.
Melissa tutted. 'She doesn't like you smothering her.'
'Unlike you, she isn't afraid of human contact!' Leanne interjected, but then made a face. She held the baby out to Melissa. 'That's not why she's crying. I think someone's left a lovely present for Mommy.'
Melissa put her hands on her hips, shaking her head with a smirk. 'You're so eager to take responsibility, so you can change her.'
And so ended Leanne's flawless record of never changing a diaper. She thought she'd make it to at least six months, what with Melissa refusing to let her do anything.
Fully aware that Melissa was watching with a satisfied grin, she attempted to do everything alone; she struggled to prepare the changing station and fetch the diaper and baby wipes, all with the baby in her arms. Uncomfortable and flustered, she gave herself a silent pep talk, telling herself that she could do this. Anyone would have thought she'd been tasked with building the pyramid of Giza the way she wiped sweat from her brow. Megan's screaming wasn't helping, either. Leanne usually found the baby's crying adorable, but not this time.
'What the hell have you been feeding her?' she exclaimed, upon opening the diaper and seeing the mess that their daughter had left. For someone who only drank milk she sure had a lot to show for it.
It was a tricky business, and Leanne actually managed to clean everything up without getting any on her hands. But the trickiest part came when she tried to put on the clean diaper.
Melissa looked at her watch. 'Fifteen minutes it's taken you, and you still haven't put on the new one.'
The soiled diaper sat on the side of the changing station; Leanne had to employ every ounce of her will to refrain from picking it up and throwing it at Melissa. She groaned instead, trying but failing to fix the clean diaper to the weeping baby.
Melissa let out a wicked laugh then shoved Leanne aside, taking over. 'She's useless, isn't she?' she said to the baby. Melissa never put on a baby voice when she spoke to her daughter – she deemed that sort of thing inappropriate. 'Can't change one diaper and she expects me to allow her to take you out.'
That was when Leanne vowed that she'd become an expert diaper-changer, just so she could rub it in Melissa's face!
Bad Habits
Some time into the fourth month of living in the Rowe Mansion, Leanne concluded that the concept of knocking before entering was lost on Melissa. Every day, without fail, she'd burst in making demands, asking questions she already knew the answers to, or sometimes she came in just to make a mean comment. But most of the time it was to hand over their daughter while she showered, cooked, or did a million other things around the house. She always managed to barge in at inopportune times, when Leanne was in a state of undress; Leanne was certain she did that on purpose, though she couldn't prove it.
Surprisingly, that wasn't the worst part of the invasion of her privacy. What worried Leanne was knowing that Melissa could walk in at any time and catch her getting up to no good. Like, for example, Leanne's new smoking habit, which she'd thus far managed to keep secret from Melissa. The same smoking habit that she'd picked up a month after moving in with her...
One morning, following a long night at the station, she lit up a cigarette the minute she rolled out of bed. It was the first thing she did every morning before getting dressed for work. She opened the
window wide and leaned outside, savoring every delectable drag, wishing it would never end.
'No you may not “sleep in” today. You're going to school and I won't hear another word on the subject.'
'Crap!' Leanne mumbled under her breath, when she heard the voice in the hallway. She flicked what was left of the cigarette into the garden, and frantically fanned the smoke out of the window. She didn't have enough time to spray air freshener in the room before Melissa walked in.
'Your son just asked if he could sleep in today. I wonder where he picked that up?' Melissa said, at the door. She was still in her nightgown, and in her arms she held their five month old daughter, who was sporting a baby mohawk. Melissa didn't bat an eyelid when she saw that Leanne had on only a tank top and underwear. She'd seen her blonde co-parent this way more times than she could count.
Leanne tried her best not to look guilty. 'I notice that he's “my son” whenever he's misbehaving.' She took the baby from Melissa.
'You're a bad influence on him. Do you know what he said to me yesterday at dinner?'
Leanne never got to hear what Dillon had said, because Melissa stopped talking and sniffed the air. Her black eyes fell on Leanne.
'Have you been smoking?'
Leanne felt like a teenager again, back in school, caught with a cigarette in her hand behind the bike shed. The tone Melissa used was akin to the ones the teachers had used, but the glare she gave her was like nothing she'd ever seen before.
'N–no, I haven't...'
'Yes, you have!' Melissa growled, pointing an accusatory finger at her. 'I can smell it on you.' She reached to take Megan back, but Leanne pulled away.
'I did it through the window, all right?' was her only defense.
'I don't care where you were doing it! You're not doing it ever again.'
'You can't tell me what I can and cannot do. You're not my mother, though you're old enough to be my great, great, great grandmother!'
She knew she shouldn't have said it, but her anger had gotten the better of her. Plus she'd been unable to finish her cigarette, so that made her more irritable than usual. She also knew that, out of all the insults she had for Melissa, this stung the most – it was a little too effective. She'd only ever said it once, back when she'd brought up the subject of moving in. She'd come to realize then that the subject of Melissa's age was a delicate one; ever since turning 200 she'd become very sensitive about it.
Melissa did the one thing she always did when she was too furious to argue back: she glared then left the room, certain that there would come a time when she'd repay Leanne for all her wrongdoings...
***
As it turned out, the best payback Melissa could give to someone who lived under her roof, saw her every day, relied on her to do all the housework and the cooking, and provided the only adult conversation in the house, was to give them the silent treatment.
It worked perfectly.
The first three days were peaceful; no fighting, no disagreements, no snide remarks. There was also no breakfast waiting on the table for Leanne when she came downstairs, and no dinner waiting for her when she got home. But she had peace, which was the most important thing. Anything pressing that Melissa had to say to her she said through Dillon. And apart from Leanne finding nicotine gum everywhere she turned – on her nightstand, in her car, on her desk at work, in her pockets – Melissa never brought up the subject of smoking again.
The fourth day was... manageable. Leanne wanted to tell Melissa about the day she'd had at work, and wanted to hear what Melissa had to say about it. But when she shared the story she was met with silence. She'd eaten take out that night and it had given her a stomach ache.
On the fifth day, she cracked. After stepping out of the shower to get ready for work, she threw open her wardrobe only to find that she had no clean clothes. Melissa took care of the laundry, and she hadn't taken care of Leanne's. That was the last straw.
'This has gone on long enough!' she said, as she stormed into Melissa's room in nothing but her towel, dripping water all over the floor. 'I have nothing to wear.'
Melissa was feeding the baby. She looked up at Leanne and grinned malevolently.
'Are you going to quit smoking?'
It was the first thing Melissa had said to her in five days.
'No, I'm not! You can't do this.'
'Suit yourself.'
'I'm borrowing something from you today.' It wasn't the first time she'd done it, and it probably wouldn't be the last. She didn't mind wearing Melissa's clothes, because everything she owned was expensive and well-made, so the fabric always felt good against her skin. Melissa, naturally, wanted nothing more to do with those items of clothing that had touched Leanne's body. She never asked for them to be returned.
'I can see what you're doing, Melissa. Putting those stupid nicotine things everywhere so you can tempt me to quit. Well it's not gonna work.'
Melissa frowned. She wanted to say that she had no idea what Leanne was talking about, but then she remembered that she wasn't speaking to her...
***
That day after work Leanne charged into the mansion, pulled out her half empty packet of cigarettes and her lighter, and slammed them on the kitchen counter in front of Melissa, where she was preparing dinner. Then she unwrapped a piece of nicotine gum and stuffed it into her mouth as the brunette watched.
'There, happy now?' she asked, chewing disdainfully.
'You've finally come to your senses, I see.' The smugness in her voice was all-encompassing.
'I haven't eaten a proper meal in five days, and I want to wear my own clothes again...' She also missed their discussions, though she'd never admit that to Melissa. It didn't even occur to her that, since living with Melissa, she'd grown dependent on the woman to the point that she couldn't function longer than a week without her.
'When will you learn that I always get what I want?'
'I don't understand you sometimes. What the hell do you care if I live or die? You never let me do anything around here anyway.'
Melissa stopped chopping the cucumber and shot Leanne a grave look. 'I'm not going to raise two children alone. You're a terrible human being, but you're better than nothing, I suppose–'
Leanne found Melissa's uncharacteristically poignant disclosure touching, despite it being wrapped in an insult. She didn't know what to say, but she knew that she'd never pick up another cigarette again.
'–so if you think you're getting out of this you're sorely mistaken,' Melissa continued. She was about the only person Leanne knew who could make child-rearing sound like a business contract!
Leanne shook her head with a chuckle. 'I'm not going anywhere. I'd never leave my family.' She meant every word of it. 'By the way, this gum is disgusting! That's probably why you bought it for me, right?'
'I didn't buy you any gum.'
'If it wasn't you then who left all those pieces everywhere?'
Just then Dillon walked in carrying his baby sister, and announced to his moms – in a disgruntled fashion – that he couldn't get to watch his favorite show because the TV kept switching to the baby channel. He told them that he thought Megan had something to do with it, but naturally they told him he was being silly.
Just a Spoonful of Something
It was in Megan's sixth month that Melissa officially ended her maternity leave. Prior to that she'd been working from home the whole time, getting her work done while her daughter slept. She'd been looking forward to returning to work, but at the same time the thought filled her with dread. Full-time work meant that she would be forced to leave her daughter in the care of a stranger. Nanny shopping was the worst part of being a parent. Nanny shopping with Leanne made a difficult task unbearable.
'Can't we just use the same nanny you used for Dill?' Leanne asked, slumping onto the sofa beside Melissa, already bored, and the first applicant hadn't even arrived.
'She's been dead for five years, so no!'
On Melissa's lap sat Megan, bu
sy gnawing on her brunette mother's fingers – a favorite pastime of hers. She happily drooled all over Melissa's hand. Although Leanne was somewhat thankful for it, she'd come to realize that the baby never did that to her fingers. She'd tried them once and decided they weren't for her.
'You didn't have anything to do with that, did you?' said a suspicious Leanne. It was a valid question, given Melissa's history.
Melissa threw her a look that said, “you're lucky I'm holding this baby, because if I weren't I'd make you pay for that insinuation.”
'All right, what are we looking for?' Leanne continued, once she'd been sufficiently glared at.
'Someone perfect,' Melissa answered simply.
'Well, good luck with that. Doubt you'll find someone perfect for twenty bucks an hour!'
***
They saw six nannies that day and Melissa hated all of them, with the exception of the final one (the only applicant Leanne didn't like). She was an intimidating looking, no-nonsense woman with a thick Jamaican accent, and she went straight into the Yes pile, because Melissa suspected she would be strict. Melissa liked strict.
'She's scary!' Leanne said, once the woman had left. 'I felt like I was in trouble when she spoke to me.'
'I think she has most of the qualities I'm looking for in a nanny...'
'Like what? Being able to scare the crap out of our daughter? Megan cried when she started singing to her!'
That was true, but it had also been the case for all of the other applicants, minus the well spoken English woman with the really spacious bag. Whenever the others spoke to Megan she'd cry, and whenever they stopped speaking to her she'd cease straight away.
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