“Hey, what’s up with you?” he inquired.
“Nothing! Nothing at all. Let’s go, shall we?” She clambered rather unsteadily to her feet, and Bob was obliged to support her with his free hand.
“Here, you are drunk!”
“I’m nothing of the kind,” she informed him, with mock indignation. “I’m just very slightly tipsy, that’s all.”
He laughed.
“Well whatever, you’d better take it easy. We don’t want to spoil the rest of the evening, do we?” He gazed at her meaningfully and she laughed again.
“Why, Mr. Beresford,” she murmured. “I haven’t the slightest idea what you’re talking about. Come on, let’s make a move! This place is the pits!”
The pair of them made a noisy and rather undignified exit but there was nobody to witness it, only the silent and melancholic Trimani, who was glumly polishing the already sparkling bar-top with a spotless white duster.
“Cheer up, Trim!” chuckled Bob, as he moved past. “It might never happen.”
Trimani forced an unconvincing smile.
“It already has,” he replied tonelessly. “Good night, Tuan. Good night, Missy.”
“Poor Trimani,” observed Melissa as she weaved out onto the steps. “For him, it’s nearly over.…”
“Come on, I’ll race you to the car!” interrupted Bob, and he loped down the steps. Melissa was about to follow, but something distracted her, a dark fluttering shape that came whirling down from the bright lamp above the door of the Mess. The thing flopped onto the white marble steps, and Melissa stooped to examine it. It was a large brown moth that had inadvertently blundered against the hot glass of the powerful lamp-casing. One of its brilliantly jewelled wings was now nothing more than a scorched black obscenity. The other wing drummed in a desperate blur in an attempt to rediscover the flight it had so abruptly lost, but it could do no more than drive the soft fat body around in a crazy circle on the floor.
“Yes, that’s the idea,” thought Melissa. “Fly too close to the flame and you get burned; but sometimes the burning itself is the pleasure. And tonight I’m going to fly.…” She stood upright and in a quick decisive motion, she brought her heel down on the luckless moth, crushing it to a shapeless crimson smear on the cool virginal whiteness of the step.” Tonight I’m going to fly!” she shouted. And turning, she raced down the steps to where Bob was waiting by the Land Rover. He turned to face her as she approached and then his arms were tight around her, his mouth was on hers, and they were kissing with a fierce, eager desperation, in the half light of the car park.
It was Melissa who broke away first.
“Not here, Bob, somebody might see us…” Her voice was husky with suppressed passion. “Later … by the beach…” He reached for her again, but she nimbly evaded his grasp and clambered up into the passenger seat. “Bob, behave yourself!” she told him firmly. “Otherwise you can just take me right home, this minute.”
“Alright, alright, take it easy. Let’s go.” He climbed up beside her. “I know a quiet little cove where nobody will disturb us.” He gunned the engine and accelerated abruptly forward, throwing out one arm to support Melissa as she swayed backwards. They roared out of the car park. Glancing back at the lonely white building, Melissa thought that she had never seen it so forlorn. The Land Rover swung out onto the coast road and Bob pushed the accelerator pedal down to the floorboards. A great rush of fragrant humid air blasted into Melissa’s face, blowing her hair back behind her in a tangled flurry. She rummaged around on the floor for a moment, found the cans of beer, and opened two of them, sending twin plumes of chilled froth spattering out in their wake. She passed a drink to Bob and took a long swallow herself.
“Where are we going exactly?” she yelled, for the wind was snatching her breath away.
“Wait and see,” he retorted, with a mischievous grin. He leaned the Land Rover into a tight bend and powered into the straight, the engine protesting every inch of the way. Melissa winced, but kept a brave face for Bob’s benefit. “Not going too fast, am I?” he yelled.
Melissa shook her head.
“I like going fast,” she replied, and instantly regretted it as he took this for an excuse to drive even more recklessly. Up ahead, the road took an abrupt rise, where it crossed a paddy field. The Land Rover zoomed upwards into the air, seemingly leaving Melissa’s stomach somewhere back along the road. Then it came crashing down with a force that shook every bone in her body. She took another pull at her beer and clung grimly on, hoping desperately that Bob would tire of the game before very much longer.
Happily, the journey was not a long one. A few miles further along the road, Bob turned off along a deserted track and took the vehicle bumping and lurching along for some distance, through ranks of scrub jungle. Unexpectedly, the ground dropped away to a long silvery stretch of beach and an endless vista of dark blue ocean lapping tirelessly in to meet the shore. The sea air smelled fresh and cool after the humid dankness of the drive.
“This is beautiful,” sighed Melissa. “How come I’ve never found this beach?”
“It’s not that well-known,” murmured Bob. “Apparently, the leathery turtles come to lay their eggs here, at a certain time of the year. The locals know about it and those are the only times you’re liable to see people on this beach.”
“With our luck, it’ll be tonight,” giggled Melissa. She turned to gaze at him enquiringly. “Who told you about this place, Bob? Who brought you here first? Was it your amah, perhaps?”
“My…” He glanced at her in surprise, then looked away again, reddening slightly beneath his tan. “What makes you say that?”
“Oh … it’s just that I heard you had … a thing for your little Chinese maid, that’s all. It’s nothing to be ashamed about, you know. Lots of men…”
“The only girl I’ve got a thing about is you,” he told her. “You don’t want to believe everything you hear, my girl.” He edged closer to her, slipped an arm across her shoulder. “You start spreading gossip like that,” he whispered, “and I’m going to have to be very … strict … with you.”
She laughed.
“Strict in what way?” she demanded.
“Well, now, I just might have to—” But she leaped from the vehicle and fled giggling along the beach, galvanized by the touch of his hand on the soft flesh of her thigh. “Goddammit, come back here,” he shouted impatiently.
“No!” she shrieked defiantly. “You’ll have to catch me first! I’m the tiger and you, you’re the great white hunter. When you catch me … I’m all yours!”
Bob swore colourfully. His frustration was rapidly getting the better of him, but he clambered out of the Land Rover and went racing after her, his long legs rapidly eating up the distance between them. They sped along the beach in silence for a moment, both of them sweating profusely in the heat of the night. Sensing that she was losing the race, Melissa veered right towards the surf but Bob hardly faltered for a moment. Then they were crashing through the shallows, their feet exploding the restless surface of the water into shattered mirrors of flying foam. Steadying himself, Bob lunged forward in a well-timed flying tackle and the two of them went down into the shallows a bundle of flailing arms and legs. He grasped Melissa around the waist and dragged her out of the water, onto the damp, firm sand higher up. She was laughing uncontrollably and Bob could see the firm outline of her young body beneath the flimsy wet dress. He pulled her roughly against him and gazed at her face for a moment. In the moonlight, it looked oddly white, almost dolllike. The salt water had dissolved her mascara, and it was running in two trails from her eyes. Her mouth was open, he could see her firm white teeth and her moving red tongue beyond. Desire shivered through him.
“I’ve caught you now,” he said hoarsely. “You’re mine. I can do anything I want with you.”
Melissa stopped laughing. She returned his gaze and then she relaxed in his arms, became passive. She did not resist as Bob’s mouth closed on hers like a vice
or as his fumbling hands began to pluck at the buttons on the front of her dress. She was both fearful and exhilarated now that the moment she had worked so hard for was at hand. She lay gazing up at the deep vastness of the night sky, only dimly aware of Bob’s impatient hands as he fumbled with her clothing. She could scarcely control her own breathing. After what seemed an eternity of waiting, his handsome tanned face moved into the range of her vision. She was momentarily perturbed by a strange expression in his eyes, a cold ruthless aggression that she had never seen before … but she dismissed the idea. Nothing would spoil the perfection of this moment. Nothing.
She held her breath, savouring the moment: the warm perfumed air, the restless pounding of surf on sand a few yards behind her. In the darkness, she could see the glint of moonlight on the bullet-shaped pendant that hung around his tanned neck. She reached up a hand to finger it inquisitively. Afterwards, perhaps she would ask him for it. It would be a keepsake, a love token.…
And then suddenly, inexplicably, pain tore through her, making her gasp, such was its intensity. A sharp, wrenching pain deep inside her, it felt like she was being violated with a knife.
“Bob!” she cried. “Oh Bob, no, stop, stop! It hurts!”
“Don’t be bloody silly! Just relax, it’ll pass in a moment.”
But it did not pass. It simply got worse by the second. Melissa began to struggle. Inadvertently, without her even knowing it, her hand clenched tightly around the silver neck chain and snapped it, pulling it free.
“Bob, oh God, please, no!” The horror of the situation overcame her now, driving away the last numbing traces of the alcohol in her system. All she could see was his face above her. The expression on it was that of a wild beast: feral, leering, gazing fixedly ahead, it seemed to possess not one iota of humanity. It occurred to Melissa in one horrible flash of conviction, that the man who was supposed to be making love to her was barely even aware of her presence, of her participation in the act. He was making love to himself; and she … she could only lie there in miserable, helpless subjugation, praying for it to be finished.
* * *
THE SOUND of the waves crashing onto the beach intruded into Melissa’s confusion as the last of her tears subsided. She was dimly aware of Bob, sitting on the beach some distance away from her. His back was turned to her as if in disgust.
“What was all that fuss about?” he asked at last.
She sat up, glared at him and with a great deal of effort, she managed to calm herself enough to spit out a reply.
“You beast!” she sobbed. “You filthy … horrible—” Words failed her. She was not schooled enough in the language of curses to articulate her real feelings.
“Hey, hey, steady on! What’s the matter?”
“Don’t you know? You were hurting me. I asked you to stop.… I begged you to, but you just carried on with it. Why?”
“It always hurts the first time,” he replied noncommitally.
“Oh I see. Something of an expert on the subject are we?”
“There’s no need to be sarcastic,” he retorted. Seeming to dismiss the subject, he reached down and carefully removed something limp and glistening from his body, tossing it carelessly aside. Melissa felt abruptly nauseous.
“I want to go home,” she announced flatly. She stood up, collected her panties from the sand where they had fallen, and began to walk away from Bob, back towards the waiting Land Rover. She felt soiled, cheapened by the sordid abruptness of the encounter. What had happened to the romance, for God’s sake? It had been nothing more than a squalid fumbling rut on the beach. She thought how Bob would boast of the exploit to his drinking friends and the shame of it brought fresh tears to her eyes. She lifted a hand to wipe them away and for the first time, she became aware that she was holding something in her clenched fist. She opened her hand and gazed at the object blankly for a moment. It was the bullet-shaped pendant.
“Look, what’s the hurry?” demanded Bob. He stumbled after her, pulling his trousers back up around his skinny legs. “It’s early yet. Let’s have a few drinks. I tell you, it won’t hurt half as much the next time.…”
Melissa’s eyes narrowed and she closed her fist back around the pendant. She whirled back to face him.
“What makes you think there’ll be a next time?” she cried bitterly. “You arrogant swine, you’re disgusting.”
He could not have looked more shocked if she had struck him full in the face.
“Well … that’s charming, isn’t it?” he complained. The two of them were nearing the Land Rover now and he hurried forward, as if to bar her path. “I take you out, give you a good time.…”
“Give yourself a good time, more like!” She shook her head. The wooziness that a few moments earlier had seemed so enjoyable, had given way to a harsher, more disagreeable shifting sensation in the pit of her stomach. She took a deep breath and tried to push unsteadily past Bob, but he grabbed her shoulder and pushed her back again. “Look,” she told him firmly. “I want to go home.”
“All in good time, my girl,” he told her, as he fumbled for his cigarettes. “Don’t you think you’re laying it on a bit strong, Melissa? After all, you’re not the only reluctant virgin in the world, let’s face it!”
“I’m not even that now,” she observed.
He lit his cigarette, blew a thick cloud of smoke into her face.
“The way I see it, you should be grateful to me,” he announced airily. “After all, I’ve saved you a lot of trouble for your wedding night. It means you’ll be able to enjoy sex from the word go. No husband wants the bother of having to break his missus in, believe me. It’s better when they come along already saddle-trained.”
Melissa gazed at him in silence for a moment. She wondered vaguely how she could have been so blind to his failings. It was as though she was seeing him for the first time and it was not a particularly agreeable sight.
“My God,” she murmured. “I knew you were arrogant, but I just didn’t realize how deep it went. You really are a nasty piece of work, aren’t you?”
“Oh, I see … well, that’s typical isn’t it. Absolutely bloody typical! A girl gives you the old come-on … and let’s get it straight, darlin’, it was you that was asking for the business all the way along … then, once you’ve had a little bit, you find you don’t like it so much and you start acting all high and mighty. Well, it won’t wash, Melissa because I know just what sort of girl you are. Believe me, in a week or so, you’ll be sniffing around again, offering it to me on a plate and by then, I won’t even be bothered to reach out and grab some.”
Melissa nodded sadly.
“You’re right about one thing, Bob. It was me that wanted … the business, as you so delicately describe it … and I certainly got what I was asking for, didn’t I? Believe me, I won’t make the same mistake in a hurry. Because I’ll tell you the sort of girl I am, Mr. Lady-Killer Beresford. I’m the sort of girl who learns by her mistakes … so the next time I bump into a stupid insufferable pig disguised as a human being, I’ll know better than to even give him the time of day.…” She reeled aside and stumbled over to the Land Rover, rested her weight against it. The turbulence in her stomach was rapidly worsening and she realized with a sensation of abject resignation, that she was going to be sick. It seemed a fitting end for the events of the evening. “Please take me home,” she wailed miserably.
“I’ll take you when I’m good and ready,” he retorted tonelessly. He stood there, his hands jammed into his pockets and the cigarette trailing from his lips, while he stared thoughtfully out to sea. There was a long uncomfortable silence, during which the pounding of waves in the middle distance seemed to rise to a crashing crescendo.
When Bob spoke again, his voice was quieter, more considerate.
“Look, alright … maybe I was a bit hard on you. I suppose it must be difficult the first time. But it’s crazy to fight like this, isn’t it? The two of us, we’ve only got a week or so left. Surely we can work it o
ut. If we could just…”
The rest of his words seemed to fade into distance as a terrible queasiness filled Melissa’s stomach. She gasped for air a couple of times and then she began to heave violently. She dropped to her knees beside the Land Rover and craned forward, her eyes blurring with tears. And the sickness came streaming up from her belly and out of her mouth and nostrils, spattering onto the sand in thick fragrant spurts. It was as though she was ridding herself of the poison she had accumulated over the evening, not just the drink, but the disappointment and shame instilled by her brief and pathetic union with Bob Beresford. She was dimly aware of his voice talking soothingly somewhere behind her, and there was the brief touch of his hand on her shoulder, but she felt quite indifferent to his presence now.
“Leave me alone,” she groaned at one point, and the hand and the voice were gone. She went on, grimly ridding herself of the last vestiges of the sickness that had so abruptly taken her; meanwhile, she had the presence of mind to keep her hand grasped tightly around the bullet-shaped pendant, telling herself that it was better to come through the ordeal with something to show for it than nothing at all.
Finished at last, she slumped down beside the Land Rover, taking long deep breaths of the cool sea air down into her scoured lungs. After a little while, Bob came back from wherever it was he had wandered. Without exchanging a word, the two of them clambered into the Land Rover and drove homewards in silence.
CHAPTER 29
MELISSA MOVED slowly along the street. Behind the twin screens of the sunglasses she wore, her eyes flitted restlessly left and right, as though afraid that somebody might be observing her; worse still, that somebody might know the dark secret of the silver pendant that she carried in the pocket of her shorts. She felt sure that Bob must have missed it by now and she had spent a sleepless night, anticipating a knock at the door of her parents’ house and Bob’s angry voice demanding the return of his good luck charm. But happily, the event had not occurred. Now it was early morning, the sun had already driven the populace from the streets and Melissa was heading for a long-arranged assignation, followed only by the thin black wraith that was her shadow.
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