I knew being with Alex was going to change my life now, but I was no longer scared. The risk of feeling this strongly for another person was worth it all. I hadn’t realized it before, but I realized it now.
I’d never be the same again.
“Mac…Mac…” he growled in pleasurable agony, thrusting deeply once more before releasing inside me. I screamed and moaned with him, my body tightening as we came together.
He rolled me over and towered over me, cupping my face in his hands and staring down at me. His eyes expressed a mixture of satisfaction and fear…I knew, because I was feeling the same way. He brushed his lips against mine, slow and soft, finalizing what we both knew—this was it. No more fighting, denying what we have, no more secrets, no more pretending we didn’t happen.
Facing William would be hard, but it was the right thing to do. Telling him the truth, everything—that’d be the most painful. But I knew my life with William was over.
Chapter Twenty-One
I woke up in a mess of sheets and tangled limbs. Alex was breathing quietly next to me, my body curled up against him. After spending all morning naked and in bed, we ended up passing out before lunch. I had managed to text Chelsea in between to tell her I was taking a personal day. My first personal day in two years. I just hoped she didn’t come searching for me.
“Mmm…” Alex rolled toward me and moaned in my ear. “This bed is so much more comfortable when you’re in it.”
“That’s because the mattress isn’t used to being worked out that much,” I teased, wrapping a leg over his hip.
“Well, let’s just hope we don’t break it.” He smirked and kissed the tip of my nose. “We could try to break our previous record and see?” I felt his lips curl up against me at the memory of doing it three times that first night.
“I’m going to start thinking sex is all you want from me…” I taunted, raising my eyebrows up at him.
“That’s the farthest thing from the truth, Mac.” I smiled up at him, relieved to hear him say those words.
“So…what do you do all day when I’m at work?” I often wondered but never brought it up.
“Sleep, play video games, order in food.” I scowled at him, earning a deep, throaty laugh in response. “I’m kidding.”
I sighed. “I hope so. Although that sounds just about right for a spoiled, rich kid,” I mocked, crying out in shock as he lowered his body over mine and began tickling me under the arms and down to my hips. “Oh my god…stop it!” I laughed harder, trying to push him away. His hands went down my legs, tickling my thighs and knees. It was a shock of pleasure torture, my legs kicking him away until he stopped. “That was just cruel.”
“That’d be a lot more convincing if you weren’t smiling.” He crawled back over me, placing a gentle kiss on my mouth.
“Well, the least you could do is feed me now. I mean, I’m practically malnourished.” He laughed and shook his head at me, kissing me once more before sliding out of bed.
I watched as he threw a pair of shorts on and asked over his shoulder, “The works?” He grinned, remembering all the food we ate at the hotel that morning.
“Of course.” I smiled back, admiring his backside as he walked out.
I lay in his bed a moment, breathing in and out slowly as I came to terms with everything. I felt like I was a forty-something-year-old experiencing a mid-life crisis, except I was a twenty-five-year-old woman about to change everything I thought I knew—everything I thought I wanted.
But Alex changed that. He showed me perhaps I wasn’t as happy and content with my life as I thought I was. William was great, and he’s a wonderful man, but settling for the wrong someone wasn’t something I was willing to do anymore. As much as it hurt to say, it was the truth all along.
I quickly hopped in the shower, rinsed off, and pulled on one of his oversized t-shirts. By the time I was done, I could smell the bacon sizzling and the maple syrup heating up.
It smelled perfect.
I walked into the kitchen to a shirtless Alex cooking at the stove—my new favorite sight ever. He was humming along to some tune in his head as he flipped pancakes on the griddle.
“You know…a woman could just get used to this.” I stood by the breakfast bar and watched him.
He looked at me over his shoulder and grinned. “I don’t know…perhaps you should wait until after you’ve tried it.”
“That’s true.” I sighed dramatically. “Maybe I should help.” I walked up behind him, his arm coming around my shoulders, molding my body to his.
He leaned down and pressed his face into my hair. “Christ, you smell delicious.”
“Wild strawberry,” I stated and smiled. He kissed the top of my head, flipping pancakes and humming.
I walked over to the coffee maker and poured a cup. He had one sitting out already, so I refilled it for him. He handed me the creamer and I poured us both a generous amount. I reached over and set his cup down next to him, grabbing the loaf of bread in the process. I popped four slices into the toaster and took out two plates from the cupboard in front of me. He opened the fridge door, grabbed the butter, and handed it to me before I could ask. We worked in smooth synchrony until we had a counter filled with food. It was nearly perfect.
“Not bad, Chef Alex. I think with some more training, you could just be a keeper in the kitchen,” I teased. We sat at the table across from each other, our knees bumping together as we devoured everything.
“Actually, I had thought about being a chef when I was younger. But once college started, I didn’t have as much time to perfect my skills,” he said genuinely.
“Really? What happened?”
He shrugged, looking down at his plate. “Not really an ‘acceptable’ career for the Lancaster blood.”
I narrowed my brows, feeling sad for him. “That’s dumb,” I spat. “Being a chef is a great position. Think of all the chefs in Manhattan who work in prestigious restaurants with booming careers. Plus, you do look pretty hot in the kitchen…just imagining you wearing a chef’s hat and apron has me dripping wet right now.” I sucked in my lower lip, playfully messing with him.
“I’d be careful what you wish for, sweetheart…I’ve been pretty nice so far.” He winked, sending a shiver down my spine at the threat of his promise.
“Are you saying I couldn’t handle it?”
“I’m saying that was just a warm-up.” He locked eyes with mine, the truth of his words evident in his face.
“It’s a good thing you fed me then…” I licked my lips, anticipating his next move. He grinned and pushed his chair back as he stood up and walked over to me.
He grabbed my chair and shifted it in front of him so our bodies were facing each other. His eyes remained locked on mine as his lips curled into a devilish grin. He knelt down and spread my legs open, positioning himself right in between. I sat and watched with excitement as his hands roamed up my thighs and stopped at the crease of my thigh. His eyes followed his hands and then he quickly looked up at me with a smirk I knew meant he was up to no good.
“Put your hands behind your back.”
“What?” I gasped as he looped a finger in my panties and began circling my clit.
“Behind your back…” he growled, looking up at me with hooded eyes. I complied and locked them behind me. “Good girl.”
My body shivered as he touched me again and wrapped a finger in my panties, sliding them down my legs. I watched as he threw them behind him and licked his lips. He gripped my thigh, squeezing with just enough force to make me twitch in anticipation. He leaned down and kissed the soft spot on the inside of my thigh and continued moving up and to my other thigh.
I kept waiting, expecting his mouth on me at any moment, but he continued his delicious torture of touching me everywhere except where I needed him the most.
“Alex…” I pleaded, squirming in the chair. He continued moving my shirt up and over my hips, exposing my pussy right in front of him. He dipped his head, kissing
down my stomach and around my belly button. I could feel my body heating up, begging for it—for him to relieve the ache—but his tongue continued its slow agony as he avoided my clit. “Alex…” I said again, warning him. I needed his mouth on me.
“You need it, don’t you?”
“Yes…” I panted, arching my hips out to him.
“I can smell you, Mac. Your scent…so fucking incredible.” He traced his tongue alongside my pussy, just out of reach of where I needed him. “I can see how wet you are…” He placed a small kiss just above my clit, sending a rush of shivers down to my core. I felt my body tighten, my hips jerking in response as I craved his tongue inside me.
My hands began to unravel behind me, unable to take it anymore. He caught them just before I brought them around me, securing them back behind me. “I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” he warned. It was the second time he told me that and a part of me wanted to test him…just to see what he’d do. But the intense look in his eyes captivated me and before I could rebel, he was back in between my legs and captured my pussy with his mouth, finally, making me gasp in response to his sudden intrusion.
“God…yes…” I moaned, pushing my hips out to him. He licked up and down my slit, sucked on my clit, and pushed his tongue inside me. Whimpered cries of pleasure escaped my throat as he pushed two fingers inside, curling them deep and hard. I could barely hold on, but his hands held me down. I wanted to rake my hands through his hair, squeeze and pull him closer, but I wasn’t about to test him now. I knew if I did, he’d stop, and that was the last thing I wanted him to do right now.
I screamed and panted until my body broke down and shook relentlessly. His moans muffled in my pussy set me off, my walls tightening around his fingers as he quickened the pace. “Oh my god…Alex…” I barely had the chance to recover before he grabbed my arms and lifted me up with him. His lips covered my mouth, his taste mixed with my arousal.
He walked us around the table and then spun me around, facing the wall. My palms hit the wall like bricks on pavement as his hands slowly, roughly caressed down my back and hips. “One taste of you would never be enough, baby. Never.” He knelt down, gripping my hips and kissing down my spine. I felt his tongue at the base of my ass, moving his body in between my legs.
He turned and faced me, his back to the wall as he knelt in front of me. I stood with my arms and legs spread as he stayed low, wrapping each hand around my thighs. He drew my hips toward him as his mouth found my clit again, his tongue circling around the bud and pulling it in between his teeth. I moaned at the sensation, the pressure, and intensity building up inside me. I was still extremely sensitive, my body barely recovered from his mouth’s assault just moments ago.
Panting, I arched my hips forward as his mouth greedily sucked and licked. My body on fire as I shook in relief, certain I couldn’t take anymore.
He released his grip as he sat on the floor with his legs bent. His eyes met mine as I watched him remove his bottoms, his arousal hard and evident. “Sit,” he ordered, but I shook my head no. My body was buzzing, and I was quite sure I’d pull a muscle if I moved again. His hands wrapped around my calves and squeezed. “I don’t think I can…” I groaned.
He looked up at me and grinned. “Sweetheart, we’re not done until you come on my cock.” His words were electrifying, unable to resist the pull they had on me. I straddled him and let him guide me onto him. “Keep your hands on the wall, baby.” He was painfully hard, filling me as deep as he could go.
I threw my head back as his mouth and hands explored my body. One hand squeezed my breast with just enough force that it nearly made me cry out in pleasure and his lips on my other breast, pulling the nipple into his mouth.
He kept up the pace, thrusting into me as his mouth and hands touched, grabbed, and sucked. It was more intense this time, but I didn’t want it to stop.
“I wanna hear you while I suck on your tits, Mac,” I heard him growl out his demand just before scraping his teeth against my nipple as he pulled it back in his mouth. I gasped, surprised by just how much I enjoyed it. “That’s it, baby girl.”
His tongue had licked up between my breasts before his lips found my mouth again, our bodies moving in rhythm as a ripple of pleasure overpowered me, setting us both over the edge.
I was spent. I didn’t care if he came at me with a cock made of gold—I needed some recovery time.
He brushed his hands through my hair, bringing my face down to him. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he kissed me, slowly and passionately. “I can’t get enough, Mac. It’s never going to be enough with you.” I kissed him in response, enjoying this softer side of him. He was a little bit of everything, but the way he adored me, needed me, cherished me—that was the side I loved the most. I never had that before, and since he had shown me what it felt like, I never wanted to let go.
Chapter Twenty-Two
We ended up back in his bed—to rest this time. He curled his body around mine, his chest pressed against my back. We had stayed silent like that for a while before he spoke up. “I’m crazy about you, Mac. I hope you know that.”
I smiled to myself. “I know.” And I did. He’d made that perfectly clear since day one. But hearing him say it now, somehow felt different.
“I don’t know what it was about you, but when I first saw you that night—I just knew I needed to know you. Something drew me to you.”
I turned and faced him, throwing a leg over his, and intertwining our bodies together. “Would that something be alcohol and poor judgment?”
“Do you always have to be a smart ass?”
“No, not always.” I smiled as he leaned in and kissed me. “So…” I inquired. “Do you think you’d be a chef if the circumstances were different?”
He narrowed his brows at me, obviously thrown off by my misplaced question. “I like to think I would’ve pursued it had the option been available.”
“And why wasn’t it?” I asked, not understanding why it was labeled negatively. “You love to cook. At one point, you considered it. What happened?”
He swallowed, his face tightening. “Do we really have to talk about this? It’s in the past. It was something I wanted years ago. There’s nothing I can do about it now.”
I drew my brows at him, curling my lip up on one side. “You’re the same age as I am…it’s not like you can’t change careers. I mean, if that was something you really wanted.”
He shook his head. “It doesn’t matter. It’d never be allowed.” I knew he was talking about William and that he’d never allow it, but it didn’t make sense to me. If being a chef was frowned upon, no wonder he’d been urging me to quit my job. Being in fashion was a joke to him.
“That’s bullshit, Alex.”
“Well, when your life is pre-planned out and all financial stability is controlled for you, it leaves limited options. You do what you have to do to keep little control that’s left. So in order to keep up the Lancaster name, I studied politics and business. At least that way, I can initially choose which position I want to get into.”
“Are you looking for jobs now?” I asked, curious as to what his future plans were.
“Yes, I’ve networked with peers and have interviews lined up through the month, starting next week. Being a ‘Lancaster legacy’ at least gives me opportunities most people my age wouldn’t even be able to touch. So, it comes with benefits, I suppose.”
“Boring benefits,” I added, smirking just enough so he knew I was messing with him.
“I know. But either way, at least I’ll have a job and can move out. Because, I’m pretty sure I’m going to need my own place pretty soon.” He looked down at me, neither of us wanting to talk about how this will change everything. We both knew it; we just weren’t sure what actions needed to take place. At least, I didn’t. There was no way I could sleep in the same bed with William and not tell him. There wouldn’t be enough time to find a place of my own, but I knew Staci would let me crash with her until I figur
ed it out.
“I’m telling William when he gets home,” I began. “I’m just not sure how.” I shrugged. It stung a little saying it aloud, but I knew we needed some kind of plan. We’d both be kicked out and with the media ready to run any story that revolved around William, we’d need to be as quiet about it as possible.
He cupped my jaw and brushed his lips against mine. He told me a thousand things in just that one kiss. Hope. Faith. Strength.
“Will you tell me about your mom?” I asked nervously, sucking in my lower lip. “William would never tell me much.” I felt him inhale a deep breath against me, his eyes peering up at the ceiling. I could tell I hit a nerve, so I wasn’t going to force him to talk about it. “It’s all right. We don’t have to talk about her,” I said softly.
“No, it’s not that. I love talking about her. I just…there’s a lot people don’t know. I’ve had to keep it all a secret and…it’s the reason my dad and I don’t get along very well.”
I sat up and leaned against the bed frame. His face was so tense and his eyes stayed low. I could tell this wasn’t easy for him, but I was glad he was willing to talk about it.
“What is it?” I prompted.
He met my gaze and I could see the pain in his eyes. There was an underlining reason behind him and William’s relationship—I always knew there was—but William would never tell me anything. That man was apparently full of secrets.
“She didn’t have cancer…it’s what he told the media, but it was a lie.”
“What?” I gasped. “Did her family know?”
“He paid them all off.” He scowled. “He pays everyone off to keep up his reputation.”
What?
It took me a minute to absorb his words, to come to terms with the fact that the man I had planned to marry was not the man I thought he was. “Why hadn’t you ever told me before? Surely, that would’ve grabbed my attention much earlier.”
“You wouldn’t have believed me then. I knew if I told you before, you would’ve thought I was lying, just to say it so you’d leave him for me.” I didn’t argue with that, it was true. I probably would’ve accused him of making it up just to get me in bed with him.
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