My behavior continued to be highly irrational. I was the level-headed leader of the most powerful 1% club around. Though I was fair, I was decisive and ruthless when need be. I was not one to get tied up over a chick damn near half my age. Yet, everything about this situation was making me act like a dick. I knew it, but I couldn’t help it—I was tired, had a long drive ahead of me, and no time for dramatics.
“Fine. You know what? I’m out,” I muttered and walked out of the bathroom and toward the front door.
I didn’t need this shit in my life.
“What?” I heard her say in an astonished tone from the bedroom. At the sound of her following me, I shook my head and held up a hand to stop her.
“We agreed on one fucking night. This is exactly why I don’t need a woman. You’re all the same. Drama and trouble,” I growled under my breath as I grabbed the doorknob to leave.
“Well, like it or not, you’re stuck with me.”
“Like hell,” I said as I opened the door and the snow blew in around me. “I’ll ask Snow to send over one of the boys to stay with you.”
She sucked the wind from my sails with her next words.
“I’m pregnant.”
“What You Need”—Bring Me The Horizon
I was handling this all wrong, but my brain was scrambled after what had happened. Not only from getting my bell rung. It was everything.
The emotions, the pregnancy, the sexy, overwhelming, stubborn alpha in my house at the moment. It was too much. I stood up and scrambled after him. My normally bold self had been flagging, and I realized it as he walked away.
Which was why I had so eloquently blurted out “I’m pregnant” and then froze in my tracks and squeezed my eyes closed as I winced. Both hands covered my face as I chastised myself for coming across like an idiot.
There was silence, and I thought maybe he’d left. Cautiously, I peeked between my fingers.
“Decker?”
“What exactly are you saying, Loralei?” His tone was deceptively calm and quiet.
Jesus, did the guy need me to spell it out? I thought I was pretty straightforward when I blurted out that I was pregnant. Slowly, I lowered my hands. To humor him, I repeated myself. “I’m pregnant, and you’re the father.”
His eyes narrowed, and anger rolled off him in waves. “That’s not funny,” he ground out.
“I wasn’t joking,” I whispered, suddenly losing my nerve again.
“I need a minute,” he said and stepped outside. Afraid he was actually hauling ass, I ran after him. Before I could open the door, I saw him out the window. He was sitting on the back steps, elbows to his knees, holding his head.
At least he hadn’t left.
Biting my lip, I watched him struggle to come to terms with the shock I’d tossed at him. I got it, though. Sure, we’d had fantastic sex, and there was definitely a strong attraction, but we really didn’t know each other. Yet, we were having a kid together.
Unless he wanted me to terminate the pregnancy. The thought didn’t sit well with me. Anger bubbled up at the possibility, though he hadn’t said a word about it. I whipped the door open, and he looked over his shoulder at me.
“I’m not getting rid of it. Maybe I wasn’t very clear before,” I said, steeling my nerves. “I’m not asking you to marry me; I don’t even need you to be a part of this kid’s life, but it’s mine and I’m keeping it. If you don’t like that, you can go. Don’t look back, and don’t let the door hit you on the ass.”
He gave an incredulous huff as he looked at me like I was nuts. “You think I’d tell you to get rid of it?”
“Truthfully? I have no idea. You came out here, and I thought you might be leaving. You think I wouldn’t have loved to run away and hide when I found out? I’m terrified—but I’m gonna figure out how to make this work with or without you.”
Abruptly, he stood, his movements so forceful, I took a step back. Snowflakes poured down, landing on his head, sticking to his lashes, and on the shoulders of his black thermal shirt. Chest heaving, he stared at me. Then he moved toward me, and I stepped back as he continued forward.
Quietly, he closed the door.
“What the hell kind of man do you think I am?” Again, his voice was deceptively calm, while his eyes belied that untruth. They flashed blue-gray fire.
“To be quite honest, other than a fantastic lay, I have no idea what kind of man you are.” Spoken in a tone as dry as the Sahara, it was the absolute truth.
My snarky words seemed to snap him out of the internal rage I could see building. The smallest quirk at the corner of his pierced lips was the only telltale sign that his mood had eased. At least a little.
“Well, let me tell you that I’d never leave you with the sole responsibility of taking care of my child. Nor would I expect you to have an abortion or give it away. So how about if we start over. Tell me how this happened.” He crossed his arms, waiting for me to speak.
I raised a brow at his request, wondering if he really needed a lesson on how babies were made. He rolled his eyes.
“You said you had an IUD. I thought those were pretty reliable?” he asked, looking suspicious.
“Ordinarily they are extremely effective. Of course, nothing is one-hundred percent effective except for abstinence. The problem is, I lost it.”
“You lost it? How the hell do you lose it?”
It was my turn to roll my eyes heavenward, because I wished I had an answer for that. “Isn’t that the question of the day,” I muttered.
“Have you seen a doctor?”
“Today.”
“And? What did they say?”
“That I’m pregnant?” I wrinkled my nose, then palmed my aching forehead.
“Like A Nightmare”—Deadset Society
The wince that pinched her face preceded her wavering unsteadily and I realized I was being a dick again. She’d had her face bashed into the concrete, and there I was grilling her like the Spanish Inquisition.
“Sit down,” I instructed her before she fell and hurt herself worse.
Relief softened her expression, and she dropped to one of the kitchen chairs.
Unsure of what to do next, I got her a glass of water.
“Thanks,” she murmured.
“No problem. So had you been feeling ill?” I asked, trying again to wrap my head around the fact that I was likely going to be a father and trying to figure out a non-dickish way to ask if she was sure it was mine.
Her chest rose in a deep breath before she deflated and her head bowed. “No, I was feeling fine. I’d gone in for a routine appointment to get my IUD replaced. Only it wasn’t there, and evidently a baby is. I swear to you, I had no idea there was an issue. It escaped my mind to check because I hadn’t been sexually active.” Her face flushed beet red at that admission.
“I’m not trying to be an asshole here, but are you sure it’s mine?”
“Yes. Considering you’re the first person I’ve had sex with in… um, a long time.”
“Why didn’t you call my grandmother instead of reaching out to Snow?” I asked her out of curiosity.
“I didn’t want to call Ms. Margaret to ask for you because I didn’t think you’d mentioned that night to her. She might wonder why I was asking for you, and I wasn’t sure how to answer that. So I figured Mr. Snow must be your friend if you had him fix my light and try to fix my car. I didn’t know what else to do. I don’t think I can do this by myself,” she said as she took a shuddering breath.
Letting it all sink in, I absently muttered, “His name is just Snow. Not Mr. Snow.”
“Huh?” She cocked her head with a confused frown.
“Snow is his road name for his club.”
“Club?”
“Motorcycle club,” I explained.
“Like on that TV show?” she asked with a residual sniffle. Her hair was a mess, scrapes adorned her face, her eye was black, and her nose was red, yet she was still insanely beautiful.
I chuckle
d despite everything that had happened. “A little like that,” I said. “Look, you seem exhausted. How about if you try to get some rest?”
“I don’t know if I can sleep,” she admitted, and in that moment, she looked incredibly young. Too fucking young.
“How old are you?” I had to ask.
“Twenty-six,” she replied, and I swallowed hard. Christ. Twenty-fucking-six.
Closing my eyes, I laid my head back on the wall. Better than twenty, but fucking hell. I was rationalizing that she was older than I’d thought. Then I had to tell myself to stop. It didn’t matter.
“You’re what, forty?” she asked, and my eyes popped open as I shot her an incredulous look.
“Hey. I’m only thirty-eight.”
“That’s only two years off. And you have a lot of gray in your beard,” she said as she dipped her head to hide the lift of her lips.
With a warning growl, I told her, “Yeah, well I’m not too old to have super sperm. Now get your ass in there and get some pajamas on.”
Though she laughed a little at that, she stood and winced a little.
“Are you okay?” I asked, worried that she might have injuries that weren’t apparent.
“Just stiff,” she admitted. She shuffled into her bedroom, and I followed to make sure she was okay.
She paused after pulling some clothes out of her drawer and cast a nervous glance over her shoulder.
“I’ve seen it all before, you know,” I told her with a slight smirk that she returned with one of her own.
“I’m not shy, if that’s what you’re thinking. I usually sleep nude,” she tossed back at me with a suppressed grin.
“Well, you aren’t sleeping butt-ass-fucking naked with Blue coming by to make rounds.” My eyes narrowed, and she shook her head. Slowly, she stripped out of her clothes. She gave me a slight smirk as the last item dropped to the floor.
The bruise forming on her arm set my rage to burning again.
It was dueling with my desire as I shamelessly stared at her naked body while she dressed in the fuzzy pants and T-shirt she’d pulled out.
“Like something you see?” she teased as she turned back the covers. Her snarkiness set fire to my veins, and I couldn’t help but reach for her.
The last thing I needed or wanted was a woman. Or a kid. I wasn’t that guy. She looked over her shoulder at me, and I clutched her hair as I turned her and rested my forehead to hers.
“I’m not what you think,” I said with a handful of her hair tangled around my fingers.
“Then show me who you really are,” she whispered against my lips.
“I’m all your nightmares in one” was my reply. Steeling my resolve, I set her away from me. “Get in bed.”
She narrowed her eyes at me and pursed her lips. For a moment, I thought she was going to argue with me. I couldn’t say it made me angry.
After the way she was damn near cowering when I arrived, I was happy to see some of her spunk had returned. She finally climbed into the bed and settled into her pillow, one hand tucked under her head.
“I’ll be out in the living room if you need me,” I said as I turned off her light.
Before I could make it out of the room, she called out to me.
“Decker?”
“Yeah?”
“Would it be too much to ask for you to stay here with me?” Her previously snarky tone had faded and was now uncertain. The light shining in the hallway reflected in her eyes, and the nervousness I saw there pissed me off. Someone had done that to her, and it made me want to track them down and choke the shit out of them.
Inwardly, I groaned. Being in a bed with her would be all kinds of wrong and way too much temptation.
“Please?”
Caving to her pleading tone, I sighed, pulled out my phone, and shot off a text to Snow and Raptor, letting them know I’d be staying for at least the night. Once I was done, I shoved my phone in my back pocket.
“Let me go check the doors.” I made the rounds through the small house and returned to the bedroom. Then I dropped my jeans to the floor.
When I pulled my thermal shirt over my head, I heard her sharp inhale.
“Turn over,” I told her, trying my damnedest to ignore the way my cock thought he was joining the party. There was no way I was touching her like that after she’d been attacked in her own driveway. She made a sound of protest but did as I said and rolled over.
Leaving my underwear on, I climbed in bed behind her and wrapped my arm around her middle. As she snuggled into me, it really hit me that she was pregnant. Cautiously, I slipped my hand under the edge of her sleeping pants, found her still flat belly, and splayed it protectively over her soft skin.
She placed her hand over mine, but neither of us said a word. Surprisingly, we both fell asleep quickly.
“Sergeant Pruitt! Oh God, help me. Please.” Specialist Conway was crying out, but I couldn’t get to him. Every time I tried to make a break from my covered position, I was forced back by the incoming rounds.
The stench of the battlefield was so embedded in my nostrils, I doubted it would ever go away. Trucks were turned over and burning, my squad was scattered, and I had no idea who was alive and who wasn’t. It was a smoky, chaotic hell.
I started to cough, choking on the thick smoke. The more I coughed, the further away my soldiers’ screams traveled. “Hold on!” I screamed.
Eyes flying open, I frantically searched for my weapon. My hands came up empty, and I began to panic. For a moment I was stuck in the nightmare of burning flesh and the screams of my brothers.
The smoke in the air sent another wave of coughing through me. It was enough to make me realize I wasn’t in Iraq anymore. I was lying in bed with Loralei, and the house was on fire. Smoke was rolling in from the open bedroom door.
“Motherfucker,” I said and started coughing again. I scrambled out of bed and closed the door.
“Loralei! Wake up!” In a mad rush, I ran to the bathroom, jerked the towels from the bar, soaked them, and brought them back.
I pulled my clothes on and shoved my boots on without socks. She mumbled in her sleep but didn’t move. She’d been facing the door, while I had been somewhat sheltered in the curtain of her hair. I prayed she hadn’t breathed too much of the acrid smoke.
“Babe, wake up!” I shook her, then rummaged through her dresser to find a hoodie. Dressing her while she was half conscious wasn’t ideal, but it was fucking cold outside. The thick fuzzy socks I shoved on her feet would have to do, because I didn’t have time to find shoes. The flames were glowing under the door. I threw one of the wet towels down to seal the bottom somewhat.
“Loralei!” I screamed as I tried to open the bedroom window.
She lifted her head and coughed violently as she braced her hands on the bed and pushed up.
“Here.” I gave her the other wet towel to hold over her mouth and continued fighting with the ancient window. When I was about to break the damn thing, it finally busted free, and blessed fresh, but cold, air blew in. Unfortunately, the fresh oxygen must’ve seeped through the cracks of the door, feeding the greedy flames.
They started to lick up the inside of the door, and I knew we were out of time. Not waiting for her to get up, I scooped her into my arms and darted for the window. I raised my foot and kicked out the screen.
Unceremoniously, I dumped her out into the snowbank under her window. She clambered out of the way, and I jumped and rolled. I’d barely gotten to my knees when a brief zipping sound registered right as a chip of the siding hit me.
“Someone’s fucking shooting at us,” I gasped out as I grabbed her and ran for my truck. We took cover on the driver’s side as I jerked on the door handle, praying my keys were still in my pocket. When the locks sounded, I sent up a prayer of thanks.
“Stay down and get over!” I told her as I shoved her in the cab. She slid over to the other side like a wet eel right as the window above her head shattered.
She scream
ed, and I swore. I used my hand to shove the brake down and the other to push the start button. Once the truck was running, I scrambled up and slammed it in drive. Tires spinning, the truck fishtailed before the wheels caught and we shot forward.
We drifted around the corner, and I prayed again that we didn’t roll over.
“What the hell is going on?” she shrieked in a hoarse voice before she started coughing.
“Don’t quote me, but I think someone set your house on fire!” I roared, followed by my own bout of coughing as I checked the rearview and realized a vehicle was following us. As fast as they were going, I didn’t think it was someone out enjoying a fun drive in the blizzard.
When I glanced to my screen, I realized my phone was connected and reached back to feel it still in the back pocket of my jeans.
“Thank fuck,” I croaked. It took two tries for my scratchy voice to register with my truck to call Snow.
“Jesus, do you ever sleep?” he said in a tone gruff from being awoken in the middle of the night.
“Open the fucking gates! We’re coming in hot!” I hoarsely yelled.
“What?” he asked, suddenly sounding wide awake. I repeated myself, and I could hear him running and yelling out orders, but then I quit listening as I tried to stay on the damn road.
Though I hated to admit it, I was terrified—and I didn’t get scared. Besides the multiple combat situations I’d survived, almost dying from a snake bite in Afghanistan taught me that being scared didn’t accomplish a motherfucking thing. Yet the thought of something happening to Loralei because I couldn’t keep her safe scared the hell out of me.
The vehicle behind us was gaining on us as we raced down the back road leading out of town. Every so often, the tires would break loose and I’d think we were heading for the ditch.
Loralei would scream in a scratchy panicked voice, then start coughing. The busted-out window had her hair blowing wildly around her as she braced her hands on the dash.
A Very Venom Christmas: RBMC: Ankeny IA Page 7