Harbour of Refuge

by Aliyah Burke

  “Sure.” She backed up and they entered. She noticed his hand on the child’s shoulder. Maybe he’d made some progress last night after all.

  Enzo paused beside her and brushed a kiss over her lips. “Can we talk?”

  “Yes, let me just go change. I was in the middle of cleaning.”

  “Oh, sorry. Should we go? Maybe we could do dinner instead?”

  “No, now is fine, I just need to get out of these sweaty clothes. Back in a few.”

  She walked away, giving Liev a smile as she passed him. She took a quick shower and dressed in a pair of grey workout pants and a Van Halen T-shirt. Padding barefoot back out to where the men were, she paused in the living room as she watched them by her patio door.

  Enzo was talking to him but Liev barely acknowledged a word he said. Turning, Enzo appraised her with his gaze and she wondered how bad it would be to put the kid outside for five minutes.

  “The television is in that stand there, maybe he’d like to watch something.”

  While Enzo got his son settled, she went to the kitchen and got some drinks and a tray of fruit. After carrying everything back to the coffee table, she placed it by Liev.

  “Help yourself, sweetie.”

  Once he had, she and Enzo went to sit on the stools lining her counter bar. They could see Liev and still talk without him overhearing.

  “What did you need to talk to me about?” she asked, drinking some of her blueberry and pomegranate-flavoured water. “I see you had a good time last night.”

  “Don’t start on that, Halyn. I told you I had to go.”

  She nodded. “Right. Looks like it was such a strain for you.”

  He glowered and shook his head. “I didn’t come here to fight with you on this. I went, did my obligatory rounds and returned to my son and slept in his room, so if he woke he’d see me there and hopefully not be scared.”

  Okay, perhaps she deserved the reprimand in his tone. She had been under the impression he’d just dumped the child and went out to party.

  “Sorry.”

  “Look, I know this is kind of a game-changer here, for us. Me having Liev thrust into my life. I am trying to figure some things out.”

  She took another drink. He was still talking in the form of us right now. Were she alone, talking to him on the phone, she’d be dancing in a circle. But since she wasn’t and he sat right beside her, she opted to play it cool. Like she had the sense God gave a mule.

  “I thought you were supposed to leave today.”

  “They went on ahead. I have to make some arrangements first.”

  A warning prickle skated up her spine. Don’t jump to conclusions, she told herself.

  “I see. What kind of arrangements?” She managed to keep her tone even and gentle.

  “For Liev. I want to ask you something.”

  Here it comes. She blinked at him, waiting for him to continue.

  He took a deep breath, a drink, then took one of her hands in his. “Would you consider keeping an eye on him while I finish this season of racing?”

  She shook her head. “No.”

  “Wait, what?”

  She removed her hand from his. “I’m sorry, Enzo. I’m not a babysitter nor am I his parent. He needs to be with his father.”

  “I’m in the middle of a season!”

  “I don’t care. Children should be raised with their parents. Not someone paid to take care of them. If you’re so confident you’re doing the right thing, why don’t you leave him with your mother? You said she loved children.”

  “You work at a toy store.”

  “Yes, I do. But I don’t run a day care. Raising a child is hard work and you shouldn’t be foisting the responsibility off on someone else.”

  “Racing season—”

  “—is a year-round thing, depending on where in the world you are. That’s just an excuse. He’s a smart child.”

  He shoved a hand through his hair. “You think so?”

  “I do. I know you were hoping I would say yes, but I’m sorry, Enzo.”

  “What if we got married.”

  Her eyes nearly bugged out of her head. “I’m sorry, did you just mention marriage to have someone to watch over your son?”

  “I’m asking would your answer be different if we were married?”

  She took a deep breath, just not quite getting it. From what he’d told her, his family was close-knit. Why would he be so anxious to get rid of his own flesh and blood?

  “I don’t think it would be.”

  He frowned. “So you wouldn’t support my racing?”

  “I didn’t say that, Enzo. But if you suddenly had a child dropped off on the doorstep, regardless of if we were married or not, I would still feel like you should be around and get to know your son.”

  His gaze drifted back to Liev before resettling upon her. “It means that much to you?”

  “The question should be, Enzo, why doesn’t it mean that much to you?” Halyn slipped off the stool and made her way to where Liev sat on her sofa. She joined him and gave him a smile when he looked away from the television to focus on her.

  He had been watching shows about science and nature. She held his gaze and grabbed some fruit when he refocused on the flat screen. Her heart ached for him—she couldn’t begin to fathom what something like he’d gone through had done to his psyche.

  With a plate of fruit in hand, she went back to the counter and reclaimed her seat. Munching on a pineapple cube, she observed Enzo. Indecision warred in his eyes and she sighed.

  “I’m sorry. I was out of line with my earlier comment. It’s not my business how you handle Liev being in your life.”

  “No. You’re right. I need to change. I just…racing was my life.” He shrugged. “Now, I’m not sure.”

  “Who says you can’t do both. I’m sure some of the men who do this are married and have children.” She nudged the plate in his direction. “Surely you can find a happy medium.”

  “Didn’t you say—?”

  “Look. I have my opinion but that’s based on me. Not you. If you want to continue racing then do. But you can’t ignore the fact you have a son. How would you feel if your father acted as if he didn’t want you either? Right after your mother abandoned you.”

  Damn it all, she didn’t want to feel sorry for him. This wasn’t her business and she wasn’t taking Liev for him to continue racing. Stick to that, good. Not taking him.

  “Can you keep an eye on him for a few? I need to make a call.”

  “Sure.” She watched him head through the living room and step out onto the patio. Then she went and joined Liev.

  “Do you like this show?” she asked as the coyote failed yet again in his attempt to capture the roadrunner.

  “Yes.”

  He’d spoken. She’d not been expecting a verbal answer and had to fight to hide her shocked expression. That one word was definitely accented.

  “How old are you, Liev?”

  “Almost nine.” He never took his gaze from the show, yet she wondered if he even truly saw it.

  “When is your birthday?”

  “September twenty-first.”

  A few months away. She watched him. “Besides bears, what is it you like? Well, besides bears and stars?”

  “Books.”

  She liked him more and more. A kid who liked books seemed rare in this day and age—they all preferred technology.

  “I see. What kind?”

  “Puzzle.”

  When Enzo opened the sliding door, Halyn was already mentally shopping for Liev’s birthday present.

  Chapter Nine

  Enzo blew out a breath as he watched Halyn talk to his son. More than that, he watched as Liev talked to her. The child still hadn’t said boo to him. Okay, so Liev wasn’t chatting her head off, but he at least he answered her. A yearning to be there on the couch filled him. He wanted to know what they were talking about. He wanted to be part of the conversation.

  He’d just stepped
in when his phone rang again. Checking the caller ID, he blew out another breath and backed back out onto the patio. “Ciao, Mama.”

  “How could you not tell me you had a son!” She was livid, her tone conveyed that beautifully.

  “I knew only yesterday, Mama.”

  “Bring him here, we need to meet him. Or I’m coming to you.”

  Not an idle threat coming from the woman who had carried him for nine months. “I’m leaving to race down in California, Mama. No need for…” He paused. “I would love to see you there.”

  “What’s his name?”

  “His name?”

  “Yes, I need to know my grandson’s name.”

  “Liev.”

  “I’ll be there tomorrow.” She hung up. He didn’t need to tell her where to go, she knew all the places they stayed when racing. This way, at least his son would be well cared for while he raced. Then he could find a more permanent situation.

  When Halyn had said no, he’d been mad. He’d wanted her to say ‘of course’ and take in his child with open arms so he could go. Now that he had given it more thought, he realised he’d been foolish to think that would have worked.

  She was a woman with her own career and he’d just begun dating her. It had to be all wrong in her mind for him to try such a thing. He rested his hand on the siding near the door and watched them interact.

  Placing another call, he waited for it to pick up.

  “Don’t yell at me,” Gio said by way of greeting. “It wasn’t intentional.”

  “Really?” He shook his head. “Are you sure? Not like some perverse payback for showing up at Jaydee’s while you were gone?”

  “Man, I’ve got triplets. Do you really think I have time to plan a payback like that? I’m up to my elbows in diapers.”

  “You could have asked that wife of yours. I’ve no doubt she could have planned it.”

  “Well, that’s true.” Smugness rang in his tone. “She’s fuckin’ brilliant. But no. It was my fault and I’m sorry. I was on the phone with her when Jaydee asked me about something you left. I told her it was Liev’s and Mama asked. I just answered.”

  “It’s okay. I told her to come out. She can get to know him while I finish the California race, then I’m taking a bit of a break for a while to get to know my son.”

  “Proud of you, bro.”

  “I want more.”

  “I know the feeling. You know we’re here if you need us.”

  “Actually, I do need something.”

  “What?”

  Enzo filled his brother in and ended the call, heading back inside. Halyn and Liev sat side by side on the sofa, eyes on the television. Well, upon closer inspection it was just Halyn who watched. Liev had fallen asleep.

  When she looked at Enzo, she got to her feet, laid Liev down and walked towards him. “Get it all figured out?”

  Tugging her by the hand, Enzo brought her into her bedroom, backed her against the wall and kissed her until she squirmed against him. He stared into her eyes and couldn’t resist another kiss.

  “Stop, Enzo.”

  “He’s sleeping.”

  “He may wake up.”

  “I’m taking him with me to California, Halyn. We’re leaving this afternoon. Are we still okay?”

  She smiled up at him. “I’m so glad you’re taking him. We were always okay, Enzo.”

  “So my having a son doesn’t make you not want to be my girlfriend?”

  She looped her arms around him. “Not in the slightest. Can I make a suggestion, however?”

  He nibbled on her ear. “What’s that?”

  “Take him shopping for clothing. Get him a bag for his things so he doesn’t think he’s not worthy of having them. If he’s going with you, he needs more stuff. He’s in the clothes he wore yesterday.”

  Shame filled him. He’d not even thought about that. “Want to come shopping with us?”

  “I don’t think so. You can’t always have a buffer between you two. You’re going to have to talk to him eventually.”

  “I do talk to him. He just stares at, or through, me.”

  “Go on, take him shopping. I’m not sure what time you’re leaving but I’ll be home all day. I have to finish cleaning and get some other things done, so stop by if you want.”

  He stared into her brown eyes. They were amazing and inviting, he would willingly drown in them. Brushing his knuckles along her cheekbone, he kissed her lightly. “I wish we could, but we’ll have to get going.”

  “I understand.”

  Holding her tight to him, he whispered, “Not how I expected to spend the past day with you, sweetheart. I had many plans for the two of us and none of them included clothing.”

  “I was kind of looking forward to that as well. Go on then, and good luck in California.”

  They returned to the living room where Liev still slept. He still mustn’t be used to the time zone. Crouching beside him, Enzo lightly shook his son.

  “Liev. Come on, wake up.”

  Eyes identical to his own stared back at him before the child sat up. His gaze darted around the room before settling once again on him.

  “We’re leaving. Going to take you shopping, grab some lunch and get on a plane to California.”

  No change in expression as Liev got off the couch and headed for the door. The boy didn’t look left or right, just went to it as if expecting something horrible to happen. Distraught, Enzo glanced to Halyn, who gave him an encouraging smile and jerked her head towards his son. Pushing to his feet, he blew her a kiss and opened the door for them to depart.

  * * * *

  Five hours later, he walked through the hotel lobby, a bag over his shoulder, two in his hands and his son pacing him, carrying his own backpack. He peered down at the boy and grinned. He’d changed into shorts and a T-shirt and a racing cap sat on his head.

  They made it to the elevator and stepped inside. The music was soft and had him trying to stay awake. Who knew shopping could be so tiring.

  “Are you excited?” he asked Liev. “To be here in California and race?”

  Nothing. In fact, the child had yet to speak to him. Instead he communicated with head shakes or nods.

  “Have you ever been to a boat race?”

  Shake.

  “We’ll go see the boat after we put things in our room. Then tonight for dinner, you’ll get to meet your grandmother. I know she’s going to love you.”

  He used the key card to the room and nodded in approval. Normally he got rooms with a single king but this time he’d got one with two queens.

  “Pick whichever bed you want. I’ll take the other one.”

  He expected Liev to take the one more in direct line with the television, but he didn’t. The child took the one closer to the window. All in all, it worked better that way for him, he’d prefer to be nearer to the door.

  They put their things down and he held out his hand. “Ready?”

  There was nothing like a small hand slipping into his. He smiled at the silent child beside him and they headed back down. They spent some time on the boat and Liev met his crew before they returned to the hotel.

  “Enzo!”

  He paused at the call. His mother was on her way towards them. Lowering his head, he squeezed Liev’s hand. “This is your grandmother.”

  “Oh, is this him?” She kissed him briefly before focusing on Liev. “He’s the spitting image of you.”

  His mother was a force to be reckoned with, so he just let her get it all out, well aware he would be answering questions later on. She knelt in front of her grandson and held out her hand.

  “I’m your grandma. You can call me Nonna.”

  Liev didn’t speak. Nor did he shake her hand.

  His mother wasn’t fazed in the least. She leaned in and kissed the child on the cheek then stood back up. “Let’s go get some supper.” She took Liev’s other hand. “We need to get some meat on your bones.”

  They all climbed in a taxi and went to
a beachside Italian restaurant. As Liev glanced over his menu, Enzo’s mother looked at him.

  “Does he speak English?” she asked in Italian.

  “So they tell me.” He, too, spoke his native language. “He doesn’t talk to me.”

  “Who’s his mother?” She moved his glass back from the edge without pause.

  “Ekaterina.”

  “Russian. You don’t speak Russian.”

  Nope, he didn’t. “Jaydee does.”

  “How old is he?”

  “Almost nine.”

  The waiter arrived and she switched to English before they ordered. Through the meal, his mother continually spoke to Liev as if he talked back to her. The child really didn’t talk much. And he’d thought Jaydee was quiet.

  After Liev was down for the night, he looked over the race course for the following day. He’d meet with Luke come morning and they’d go over it one more time. Then the race, and Liev would stay with his grandmother on the sidelines.

  * * * *

  The next morning, he walked down with Liev between him and his mother. The closer they got, the more into his racing mindset he fell, focusing on what was coming. So much so that when a reporter stuck a microphone in his face, he barely acknowledged him. Near the powerboat, he knelt down and stared his son in the face.

  “You stay close to Nonna. I’ll be back.”

  Nothing in response, but he pushed it to the side and got to his feet. Brushing a kiss along his mother’s cheek, he tucked his helmet under one arm and strode off to get in his seat. Buckled in, he glanced at the man beside him. They fist-bumped and nodded. Each ready to do what they were paid to do.

  * * * *

  “What are you smiling about, trouble?”

  Halyn glanced up to see Mila standing there. “Am I? I didn’t even notice. What are you doing here?”

  “You invited me to dinner.” She frowned. “Did you forget?”

  She blew a puff of air, lifting her hair from where it hung over one eye for a brief second. “I did.” She grinned sheepishly. “I’m sorry, I got lost in my gardening.”

  Instead of being upset, Mila merely snorted and rolled her eyes before plunking down beside her. “What can I do? We can go out later.”