Hold On

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Hold On Page 29

by Kristen Ashley


  With that, he punched a button and tossed the phone to the couch.

  He looked back to me. “Okay. Done. Now we got, like, no time to eat pizza. We’ll have to snarf it down before I gotta meet Teddy at the game, which sucks, and I’m blamin’ that on Peggy too.” He looked to Merry. “I gotta get my bag, then we can go.”

  On that, he tramped from the room, Merry and me turning to watch him go.

  “Just to say,” Merry started softly, and my thoughts on my kid, worried, my eyes drifted up to him, “not sure how much better I gotta get to know your boy.”

  I felt my lips part, but he wasn’t done.

  He looked down at me. “Think I just fell in love, brown eyes.”

  I couldn’t stop it, no way.

  I swayed toward him.

  He caught me in both arms.

  And he still wasn’t done.

  “He’s a good man, takin’ care of his mom.”

  “Yeah,” I whispered.

  Merry smiled at me, soft and sweet.

  Ethan stormed into the room, looked at us, and stopped.

  “Okay, maybe I was wrong about the gooey, ’cause…gross,” he declared.

  Merry didn’t let me go.

  Ethan threw out an annoyed hand. “We gonna get pizza or what?”

  “We’re gonna get pizza, bud,” Merry said, dropping one arm but keeping his other around me to guide me Ethan’s way.

  “You okay?” I asked him as we moved.

  “Uh…no,” Ethan answered. “Peggy’s totally crazy and Dad just stood there and let her mouth off at you. All he cared about was that Merry’s a cop. What’s that all about?”

  “Well…” I let that trail off, not sure I felt like sharing Trent’s rap sheet and drug history and thus his natural aversion to law enforcement with Ethan at this juncture.

  “It doesn’t matter.” Ethan lifted his chin again, eyes on me. “He’s weak. I’m not weak. I’m like you. I can take care of myself. I can take care of you. And I’m like Merry, who’s all, get in your vehicle and go, real angry-like but still patient when you just gotta take one look at him and see he so totally wanted to whale on Dad.” Ethan looked to Merry. “I kinda wish you did, though Mom says hitting people is wrong. Dad needs some sense knocked into him.”

  Merry let out a sharp, startled bark of laughter.

  I swallowed mine back and, once I managed this, said, “Ethan, honey, you need to calm down.” He looked to me. “You need a shot of tequila?” I offered.

  “Yes,” he answered instantly.

  “Well, you’re gonna have to make do with the buzz of a two-liter glass of Coke at Reggie’s,” I returned.

  He stared at me and suddenly the emotion that was controlling him shifted and I saw his jaw set, but he couldn’t fight it.

  His chin wobbled.

  My heart skipped and the pain of it nearly took me to my knees.

  “They’re not gonna get me, are they, Mom?”

  “No, baby,” I answered quickly, firmly, but softly, holding back, wanting to rush to him and put my arms around him, but not wanting to mother him when he was going through a lot, holding it together, and doing it in front of Merry.

  He looked into my eyes, nodded, and said, “Sorry, Mom, but he knows.” He looked up to Merry. “You’re police. You know the law. Are they gonna take me away from my mom?”

  “Absolutely not, Ethan,” Merry stated quickly, firmly, and not softly.

  Ethan swallowed.

  Then he nodded at Merry.

  “Maybe we should cancel things with Teddy,” I suggested, and Ethan’s attention came back to me. “After pizza, we can all hang for a while.”

  “Only if Merry stays for waffles in the morning,” Ethan decreed.

  I tensed.

  Merry didn’t.

  He said, “If it’s cool with your mom, I’m here.”

  I drew in a deep breath and nodded.

  Merry slid his arm around my shoulders again and stated, “Your mom and me’ll go to the game with you and you can hang with your bud. Then we’ll bring you home and we can all hang here.”

  The worry slipped away as Ethan’s face lit when he realized he had me, Merry, pizza, the game, time with his friend, and together time at home. “Awesome! I hate to miss the ’dogs when they’re playing at home.”

  “Then we got plans,” Merry muttered.

  “I’ll take my bag back and call Teddy,” Ethan announced, grabbed his bag and took off.

  I turned to Merry.

  “So, we fucked around for a week and a half getting to the zone where we’d start, then I catapulted you straight to hyperdrive with my kid, my life, and my problems. Does your hair feel like it’s on fire?”

  Merry smiled at me. “Nope.”

  “Well, that’s good,” I mumbled, looking at his shirt.

  “Cher.”

  I lifted my eyes to his.

  “That thinkin’ I did was not about knowin’ I wanted back in your pants,” he stated. “I already knew that. It was about me knowin’ I wanted to be a part of your life. I wanted this to happen, honey. It happens now, two days from now, two weeks from now, I wanted it. I got it early. I’m down with that. So stop worrying.”

  I glared at him. “You can stop being perfect. I’m getting a complex.”

  He again smiled at me. “You look good. There’s no better ass in a pair of jeans in the entire county and it’s mine to tap. You’re a great mom. You put together a great pad, though I’m worried the ghost of Jimi Hendrix is gonna glide through at any second. You raised a great kid. And I get to make you both waffles in the morning. I’m thinkin’ I didn’t do too bad either.”

  God!

  Merry.

  “Ethan caps my gooey, I’m capping yours,” I decreed.

  He dipped his head to me, curling me closer, his tone telling me his thoughts on what gooey was were vastly different than mine. “How much I get?”

  I opened my mouth to speak as I mentally told my spasming vagina to behave, but Ethan raced into the room and shouted, “Guys! Seriously!” so I didn’t get to say anything.

  I watched Merry smile again.

  I liked it.

  Then I watched him move away, and after that, I participated fully as I went out with both my guys and had pizza.

  * * * * *

  “She does this sometimes, passes out in front of the TV.”

  I heard that coming in a whisper from Ethan.

  “I bet.”

  That I heard as a low rumble up close, coming from Merry.

  “I usually shake her real gentle until she wakes up. Then I help her make sure the house is locked up, the lights are out, and we go to bed.”

  Again from Ethan.

  “How ’bout you make sure the door’s locked? I’ll get the lights and get your mom to bed.”

  That was Merry.

  Me?

  I was realizing I was curled up on the couch, my head cushioned by something warm and awesome, but it was not exactly soft because it was Merry’s thigh.

  Shit.

  I opened my eyes on a blink and saw Merry’s stocking feet on my coffee table. I slowly shoved a hand in the couch and pushed up.

  “I’m awake,” I lied, poorly, seeing as the words were slurred.

  “Right,” Merry muttered.

  I tipped my head back to turn sleepy eyes to him.

  The grin he aimed at me was soft and sweet.

  Shit.

  Total junkie for that look, that grin.

  Hell, I was just plain addicted to Merry.

  “I’ll do the door and the lights,” Ethan said quickly. “’Night, Mom.”

  I turned my head, lifting a hand to shove my hair out of my face and seeing my son on the go. “’Night, baby.”

  He also aimed a grin at me as he switched out the light by the couch.

  I felt Merry shift and looked his way to see him taking his feet right before he bent deep and took hold of me. He lifted me up into his arms in a bride and groom ho
ld right in front of my kid.

  I woke up a little bit more.

  “Merry.”

  “I’ll get her to her room and help you, bud,” he said to Ethan as he negotiated the space between coffee table and couch.

  “’Kay,” Ethan replied.

  Merry kept walking.

  I put my hands to his chest. “I can make it to my bedroom.”

  “I’m sure you can,” Merry said but didn’t put me on my feet.

  I rolled my eyes, which was about all I had time for before we were in my room (my house was tiny).

  He put me to my feet by the bed.

  “Get ready,” he ordered when I tilted my head back to look at him. “I’m gonna help Ethan close the house down for the night.”

  “Whatever,” I muttered.

  He grinned at me.

  I stumbled slightly and annoyingly as I headed to my dresser.

  Merry chuckled.

  I rolled my eyes again.

  I felt his presence leave and the truth of it was, it was late, I was tired (I didn’t get a lot of sleep on any kind of normal basis), life had been a roller coaster lately but we’d had a good night, the three of us, and right then, I was out of it.

  So out of it, I didn’t have it in me to dig through my drawers and accomplish the colossal feat of finding sleepwear sexy enough for the first time I wore it around Merry (both our times sleeping together, we’d done it naked) at the same time being appropriate for me to sleep in with Merry and with my kid in the house.

  Since I likely didn’t even own such a miraculous piece of clothing, I dragged out some drawstring pajama shorts, a tank, tugged off my clothes, and yanked them on.

  I struggled out to the bathroom as Ethan was hitting his room.

  “’Night again, Mom,” he bid me.

  “Sleep good, kid,” I returned.

  “You too,” he said then, “’Night, Merry. Can’t wait for waffles.”

  “Me either, bud. Sleep tight.”

  I glanced at Merry briefly, went into the bathroom, turned on the light, and shut the door.

  I listed around doing my business, put zero effort in brushing my teeth (but I still managed to drag the toothbrush around), rinsed, spit, decided my makeup could stay on, and left the bathroom.

  I hit my bedroom to see Merry getting up from the bed, shirt off, socks off, belt undone, and this made me partially rally.

  The problem with that was he just grinned at me and walked out of the room, so his chest and the hair on his stomach with the arrow pointing to good things walked out of the room with him.

  So I lurched to the bed, threw back my Janis Joplin covers, and did a face-plant in it.

  I was snoozing when I felt the bed move, the dim of the lights on my eyelids disappearing completely because Merry turned out the light. Then he fitted the line of his lean, warm, hard body into mine, spooning me.

  “Thanks for pizza,” I muttered sleepily into the dark.

  He hauled me close with his arm around my belly.

  “Shut up, brown eyes, and stop thankin’ me for everything.”

  I ignored him.

  “Thanks for gettin’ in Trent’s face and bein’ all cool even though you wanted to whale on him.”

  His body started shaking.

  I kept mumbling.

  “Thanks for bein’ nice to my kid.”

  “He’s easy to be nice to.”

  I knew that, so I ignored that too.

  “Thanks for givin’ up an awesome blowjob à la me to watch Fast & Furious 6 with my boy.”

  “Just sayin’, that’s a debt you hold, baby, and I’ll be findin’ a time to collect.”

  I looked forward to that.

  It seemed I had enough strength in me to use my mouth to speak. But not to suck him off, no way, especially with my kid in the house, which was a shame (the not-being-able-to-suck-Merry-off part; my kid being in the house was never a shame).

  “Thanks for waiting for me to get my head outta my ass so I could take a shot on this, because so far, it’s workin’ great.”

  His arm at my belly got tighter and I felt his breath stir my hair when he tipped his head to me, but he said nothing.

  “Merry?” I called.

  “Right here, Cherie,” he said softly.

  “Thanks,” I whispered.

  He kissed the top of my hair and whispered back, “Go to sleep, sweetheart.”

  “Okay,” I muttered.

  “Just sayin’,” he continued quietly. “You get it. You live with Ethan. You got that in your life. You get that goodness. You don’t get it about you, but I’ll get you there. But at least with half of it you know, the pleasure is all mine.”

  God.

  Merry.

  I snuggled back into him, closing my eyes tight.

  He shoved his other arm under me and wrapped it around my upper chest.

  “’Night, brown eyes,” he murmured.

  “’Night, baby,” I murmured back.

  Merry held me close, his body spooning mine.

  And I fell fast asleep.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Never Dared to Dream

  Cher

  My eyes opened and I saw my bed stretching out in front of me, the pillows next to mine dented with sleep.

  They’d been dented by Merry.

  That made me realize I felt warm and it wasn’t the bedclothes that was doing it.

  I listened but heard nothing. I lifted up and saw my clock said it was nearly nine thirty.

  Merry, I was discovering, woke early, even without an alarm clock.

  Ethan, on a weekend, slept as long as he could.

  Curious as to what Merry might be doing in my house with no one awake, I pushed the covers back, threw my legs over the side of the bed, got up, and headed straight out of the room.

  In the hallway, I saw Ethan’s door was open.

  Interesting.

  Walking down the hall, I heard it. Voices murmuring. Being quiet.

  They didn’t want to wake me.

  My two guys in the kitchen, my son up early because Merry was there, being quiet in order not to wake me.

  I’d never admit it to anybody, but that made me feel warm too…and squishy.

  My feet silent on the carpeting, I headed to the living room through it, the murmurs becoming more distinct, but I couldn’t hear much of anything.

  Until I hit the doorway of the kitchen. I heard them. I saw them.

  And my knees went weak.

  Ethan was in his jammies at the table, hair a mess, shoveling waffles in his mouth.

  Merry was at the counter, jeans on, shirt on but untucked, feet bare, standing next to the waffle iron but taking a sip off coffee, his mouth curled up, his eyes on my boy.

  Oh yeah. Shit.

  Warm and squishy.

  “So I was all, ‘kiss my butt,’ and they were all, ‘whatever,’” Ethan was saying.

  I had no idea what he was talking about, but whatever it was, Merry found it amusing.

  I liked this. I liked Merry making my kid waffles. I liked the fact he could do that at all, considering I’d paid three bucks for that waffle iron and it’d only worked once, so I was glad he’d fixed it. And I liked my kid having a guy in the house to babble guy shit to, getting up early to do it on a Saturday morning.

  I leaned against the jamb and instantly got two pairs of eyes, my brown ones in my son’s face and Merry’s blue ones in his beautiful face.

  “Mom! Cool! You’re up!” Ethan cried. “Waffle time!”

  “Seems you started without me,” I noted.

  Ethan smiled. “I was hungry.”

  I looked to Merry. “How many has he had so far?”

  Merry was still grinning but now doing it at me. “Three.”

  “I’m a growin’ boy,” Ethan decreed.

  “You’re definitely that considering I’m soon going to have to sell my plasma in order to keep you in Oreos,” I returned.

  “I’ll sell mine too so we c
an double up on America’s finest cookie,” Ethan offered.

  I shook my head, doing it smiling, and moved into the kitchen. I went straight to my son and didn’t push my luck with gooey. I just reached out and shoved his head to the side, but I did it tousling his hair just a little bit, hoping he wouldn’t notice.

  He noticed and I knew this when he muttered, “You’re a goof, Mom.”

  “Whatever,” I muttered back and moved to Merry.

  He watched me and I watched him, thinking he looked right at home in Janis Joplin’s kitchen.

  I got close, put a hand to his abs, and lifted up to kiss his jaw.

  “Mornin’, baby,” he said quietly.

  I pulled back my head but stayed close, looking him in the eye, trying to decide if him making my son waffles in my kitchen was a better “mornin’” than the one he’d given me the day before.

  It was an impossible decision. I was just going to have to equally enjoy all the boons he was giving me.

  I didn’t suspect this would be hard.

  “Mornin’,” I replied.

  “Want waffles?” he asked.

  “Want coffee,” I answered, shifting away. “After teeth brushing,” I went on. “Then waffles after coffee,” I finished, wandering out of the room.

  “I’ll get on that, princess,” Merry said.

  I gave him a look as I hit the doorway.

  “Mom!” Ethan cried again like I wasn’t five feet away from him.

  I turned in the door and lifted my brows.

  “Teddy still wants to go to that movie we were gonna see today. If I call him and his mom’s still up for takin’ us, can I go?” he asked.

  Could my son go to a movie, taking him out of the house for a few hours on a day that Merry had off and I might be able to spend that time with him?

  “Sure,” I answered.

  “Awesome!” he near-on shouted. “I’ll call Teddy after I finish eating. If his mom needs it, can you drop me at their place?”

 

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