by Nana Malone
“I’ll bet you did.” Jaya giggle. “Did you tell him that?”
“You mean the man with his wife, or whoever the fuck that was, standing in his kitchen? No. I was a little preoccupied, and I can’t tell him that.”
Jaya frowned. “Why not?”
Because he’ll break my heart. “‘Cause it’ll complicate things. And you know how I feel about complications.”
“Right. Well, all I’m saying is I know you’re a smart woman. I know you wouldn’t deliberately run away from love. It’s so fleeting, and even if it’s scary to fall like that and completely trust someone else, I know you understand how rare that is, and you wouldn’t voluntarily run from it. Not my best friend. You’re way too bright to do that.”
Micha clamped her mouth shut. Across the way, they watched Caleb’s rangy frame head to the door. When he yanked it open, the diminutive tornado that was a pissed off Ricca shoved hard at his chest. She didn’t get very far, so she shoved again. When that didn’t work, she took off her heels and started beating him with them. All the while screaming at him.
Micha chuckled as she imagined what her friend was saying. Likely her full Trini accent would be in force. And likely she was threatening him with ancient African religions and Voodoo and what they could do to his balls and genitals. Then she scowled at him and tried to beat him again. But this time, he enveloped Ricca in a hug to restrain her arms.
“Oh, that can’t be good,” Jaya said.
“No,” Micha agreed. “I’ve been telling her for months she should come with me to Krav Maga.”
Jaya giggled. “Can you really see tiny Ricca and her huge boobs fighting off assailants?”
“I have boobs. You simply strap them down and get to work.” She cast a worried glance at Jaya. “You think we should go over there?”
Jaya shook her head, her eyes dancing. “Nope. He won’t hurt her. He’s already setting her down. Oh damn, he’s taken her shoes.”
Ricca made a valiant snatch for them, but he held them out of reach. Glancing at Jaya and Micha, Ricca shrugged. Caleb looked over as well, and Micha held her ground. Across the courtyard she could feel his fevered gaze on her. She kept replaying the scene in her head over and over and over again. I’m in love with you, and you love me too. I’m in love with you. I’m in love with you. God, why did he have to do that to her? Why did he have to make her feel like this?
Ricca stormed out of Caleb’s and was back at Micha’s in two minutes. Her hair was disheveled and her eyes were bright. “That oaf took my Jimmy Choos!”
“The nerve of him,” Micha mumbled.
Jaya giggled. “To be fair, you were using them as weapons against him. He didn’t really have much of a choice.”
Micha indicated her bedroom. “I have the same pair. You can grab mine.”
Ricca headed for the bedroom adjusting her askew clothing.
Micha stopped her. “Did he say anything?”
Ricca rolled her eyes. “Only that he meant what he said, and that he loved you, and that the woman was not his wife, but a case he was working.” She shrugged. “I’m inclined to believe him. The skank wasn’t there when I barged in.”
Skank. Wow, Ricca must have really been pissed. Skank wasn’t part of her repertoire. She watched her friend stalk toward her bedroom and called out once more. “Oh, hey, Ree?”
Ricca whirled around, her thick hair billowing in a cloud around her. “Yeah?”
“Thank you.”
“It’s nothing you wouldn’t have done for me,” Ricca said.
Jaya took Micha’s hand. “She’s right, you know. We have your back. If Caleb has a secret family, then I’m next in line to deliver him an ass whooping. But maybe, he’s telling the truth.”
Micha scowled, and Jaya held up her hands. “I’m just saying. Maybe this one time he deserves the benefit of the doubt.”
But it wasn’t just about giving him the benefit of the doubt. Last night he’d gone on and on about how she should trust him and open up to him. She’d told him about the lowest in her life and he never once mentioned his past. Wife or not. She was the one vulnerable and exposed and he’d kept himself closed off. That’s what stung the most.
Chapter 20
“I thought we established that Caleb Atkins was to be your protection.”
Micha looked up from her computer to glare at Adele Westhorpe. “And I thought we established that while you might run my professional life for the time being, you weren’t my parent.”
Adele smoothed her bob and sat across from Micha. “You’re being childish.”
“By all means, have seat.” Leaning forward in her chair, her hands clasped, she pinned Adele with a glare. “You said I need a babysitter. And I have one. Several actually, if the small troop that followed me from the hotel this morning is to be believed. So what’s your problem? I’m following your arrangement to the letter.”
“Don’t be obtuse. Our deal was you were to follow the directives of Caleb. From what I understand, you left your home to go and stay at the hotel.”
This was exhausting. Micha hadn’t slept properly in two days. She also hadn’t seen Caleb, but she knew he was kept apprised of everything where she was concerned. And she had a hell of a few days coming her way. She had to prep for her Simon interview, and seeing him again was not going to be good for her. How the hell had her life spun so out of her control?
“When this whole mess started, The Westhorpe was one of my options. I simply availed myself of it a couple of nights ago. You should be happy. I’m listening to reason. I haven’t given my detail the slip, and I let them act like I’m a foreign diplomat or some shit. I’m following the rules.”
“Where is Caleb?”
“Lady, I’m not his keeper.” Then realizing how harsh that sounded, she added, “I appreciate the concern. But honestly it’s unfounded. I’m fine. Caleb’s men are all over me like a pleather suit. I’m perfectly safe. You need to back off.”
“I’m protecting my investment.”
Micha studied the older woman. The deepened lines around her mouth, the lines in her forehead. Her usual sleek bob was windblown and a little disheveled. She was dressed impeccably in a vintage Chanel suit, but the accessories were all wrong. Adele looked a little out of sorts herself. Had she been worried about her? That was impossible. The old woman didn’t really know her. No one did.
“Look. I’m fine. I’m perfectly safe. I appreciate the detail, but you and I both know it can’t last forever, and frankly I don’t think this calls for this level of security. It feels like overkill.”
“It’s my prerogative to worry about employees.”
“Uh huh.” For the first time in a long time, Micha felt like she had a mother again. A hard as nails, meddling, pain in the ass mother. But who could really choose their parents? And since Adele was in such a concerned mood, it didn’t hurt to try a new tactic. “But since you are so concerned about me, I’m thinking we might want to change out the security company we use to maybe a larger outfit. Caleb and his team are doing a good job, but maybe it’s time for them to—”
Adele pursed her lips and narrowed her eyes. “I’m not an idiot, Miss Bennett. Mr. Atkins stays. You’ll have to work out the lovers’ spat you’re having and deal with him.”
Micha’s jaw went slack as the older woman stalked out her door.
***
Micha sat in the passenger seat of Caleb’s BMW, mutinously silent. Still smarting from her conversation with Adele, she tried every relaxation technique she could think of. But every time she closed her eyes, all she could see was Adele telling her to do as she was told. Alec really had to do something about his step-mother.
Like it or not, Micha was stuck with Caleb. In the car for another hour and a half. And that’s if they were lucky and didn’t hit any traffic. She would not break down and cry—or throw things. She kept repeating the mantra over and over again to herself.
“You’re really not going to say a word to me the whole way
up?” Caleb’s gravelly voice reverberated in the near silence. They’d tried music, but neither of them could agree on anything, so instead, they’d turned it off and put on NPR in the background.
Micha turned to him and muttered, “Word.” Then she turned back around to stare out the window. Fine, so that was childish, but she didn’t give a flying fuck. Emotional remnants of the other night still sliced deep. Caleb forcing her to look into his eyes as he slid against her G-spot. Never allowing her to look away or hide from him. Then finding that woman in his kitchen.
“Oh, real mature, Micha.”
“I’m not having this conversation with you, Caleb.”
He exhaled. “Well the good news is that you and I are stuck in the car together, so you can’t run away like you always do.”
Run away? He was the asshole who would be running away once she got done with him.
“I’ve already said everything I have to say on the matter.” She kept her voice cool and professional. Detached. If she could only stay detached, she could get through this drive. She’d need a whole other coping mechanism to get into the interview with Simon, but she’d worry about that later. Like when she actually saw him later. As plans went, she could have used Jaya’s help on this one.
“Fine. I didn’t exhaust everything I have to say.”
Perfect, she’d be forced to listen to him for the next ninety minutes. As torture devices went, this was a doozy.
“You’ve been running away since I met you.”
She ignored him. But his voice melted over her like warm chocolate. She loved the sound of it and it eased the tension out of her shoulders.
“You remember that first night? Alec and Jaya had disappeared, and then Ricca had given us some space on the dance floor. I thought I’d hit some kind of jackpot. You were so fucking sexy. When you pulled on my hand and whispered that we should get out of there, do you have any idea how hard it was to not take you up on that offer?”
She didn’t speak, but she shifted in her seat, thinking about how he felt inside of her.
“Fine. I’ll tell you. It was blue-balls hard. You’d been grinding on me for over an hour, and all I wanted to do was sink into you so quick and so fast that neither one of us would have moved for a week. Problem was, I’d seen you smile at something Jaya said earlier. It was such a sweet smile. A genuine one. No pretext, no edge, just a smile for a friend. I wanted to know how to make you smile like that again. I knew that as soon as I slept with you I’d lose my chance to do that. So I asked you out instead.”
He would not get to her with some sappy story. Even if it was sweet. She shook her head. She didn’t need to think about him wanting to make her smile. Her brain played the reel of that woman asking if Caleb still did that thing with his tongue over and over again. She ground her teeth, bracing against the pain. “Sorry to disappoint you.”
“Ahh, she speaks. Well, anyway, clearly you turned me down that night. But I figured all I had to do was keep asking, and eventually you’d say yes.”
“You underestimate me,” she muttered.
“Yeah, I should have known better. I eventually saw the writing on the wall once Alec and Jaya hooked up. I knew I had to get to you before Beckett and Ricca figured their shit out because there was no way you’d even sleep with me if they were together. And I was right.”
“It doesn’t matter, Caleb.”
He ignored her. “So I’ve been trying to be your friend. But I can’t help but want you. I figure, I might have had a shot once if I didn’t care about what made you smile.”
“Caleb, stop, this won’t get you what you want.”
He shrugged. “You learn to be patient when you’re in a ditch somewhere, waiting days to get a kill order.”
Micha whipped her head around to stare at him. He never talked about himself. She didn’t think anyone besides Alec knew about his past in Afghanistan.
“Anyway, so I figured I’d lost my chance. Then Adele paired us together for the dance. I thought if I could make you smile, you’d actually see me. You know. I’m not a bad looking guy.”
“Modest too.” Micha rolled her eyes.
He grinned. “More like honest. And you clearly find me attractive.”
“Again with the modesty.”
“Again with the truth. So I figured you’d come around. Then all you did was fight me. At the rehearsal dinner, I only wanted to make you feel better. Next thing I know, I’m living every dream I’ve had for the past two years. But again, you’re weren’t all over me, because you wanted me. You were on me, because something scared you. And as much as I wanted you, I wasn’t going to take advantage like that.”
“Because, what? You love me?”
His cheeks flushed, and he exhaled a long sigh. “Actually, yes.”
“Bullshit.” He didn’t love her. She knew better than to believe that lie. No one loved her once they knew her well enough.
Caleb shrugged again. “Then that night in your apartment. I was sure I was dreaming, but there you were in my arms. Once you climbed on top of me, you should have known that I wasn’t going to run anywhere. I’m not letting you go without a fight, Micha. I’ve been in love with you since that smile, and you’re not running me off with your doubt and your fear. When you come around, I’ll be here.”
Micha covered her face with her hands and let out an exasperated laugh. Why was he so fucking stubborn? “You say you love me?”
His grip tightened on the steering wheel. “It’s the truth, Micha. I don’t need to tell you I love you so you’ll sleep with me. It’s the only truth I have for you.”
“Fine, then how come you never shared anything about your past with me? The stuff that matters.”
He was quiet for a moment, the quietly said, “I’m an open book. What do you want to know?”
Now was her chance. If he would even tell her the truth. “How did you end up here? Doing security?”
“I was a Marine. Did two tours in Afghanistan. I eventually opted out of sitting in dark desert holes or lonely towers waiting to kill people. After my second tour, I transferred to State Department, escorting diplomats and Americans to scary places.”
Micha hung onto every word. She wanted to know more. Was dying to hear more. “How did you meet the brunette with the rack?”
Caleb shook his head. “I was sent with this oil tycoon and his family to protect them while they brokered a deal for bio fuel in Colombia. Sabine and I had covers that allowed us constant access to the family. We didn’t want the Colombian government knowing that there were US ties to the deal. I acted as James Sanderson’s advisor. Sabine was placed there as my wife. It gave her access to the family and to their daughter. We were on strict protection duty. Nothing was supposed to go wrong.”
Caleb went silent for a minute, and Micha slid a glance over to him. His eyes were anguished. And his jaw was set firm.
“At any rate, we were escorting the family to a birthday party, and we were ambushed on the road. We lost everyone. I still don’t know how it happened or who gave up our coordinates or if it was dumb luck. We were taking such heavy fire we couldn’t even get the bodies out. It was Sabine’s job to keep the kid in the car. The vehicle could withstand pretty much anything except a rocket launcher. Instead, she ran out to try to cover one of our men. They bombed the car.” He was silent for a moment. When he continued, his voice was grave. “It’s haunted me for years. That little girl. She had been so excited for that party. When we returned home, we were the only survivors, and Sabine said it was lack of operational direction. She threw me under the bus to save her own hide.”
He went silent again. And doubt niggled at Micha’s brain. He was right. She wasn’t upset about Sabine. She was upset about the surprise of Sabine and the fact that he’d never shared anything with her but still expected her to completely open up to him. You never asked.
“Were you hurt?”
Caleb shrugged it off. “Mostly shrapnel. In my back. I think the being stabbed in t
he back thing is a great metaphor.”
Micha cleared her throat because she was curious and wanted to hear the answer, and at the same time, she didn’t want to know. “Have you seen Sabine since that day?”
“She called me a week ago with information about who took out the Sanderson family. She said she had an informant she needed me to hide for a few days. Then she’d give me the information I wanted.”
“Who was the informant?”
“Young girl. Early teens. That kid was smart though. It appears she doesn’t trust Sabine any more than I do. First chance she had, she bolted.”
Micha frowned. “Oh, God. If you say she’s only a kid, how the hell is she surviving on her own?” Although she’d managed to do it.
“I have one of my guys watching her. She needs to feel like she’s in control before she’ll talk. I don’t know what Sabine wants with her, but it can’t be good.”
“You don’t think Sabine has her best interest at heart?”
“Yeah, that’s a negative. Sabine has always been selfish and wanted all kinds of things she couldn’t have.”
“You?”
He shook his head. “Usually money. I made the mistake of thinking she was a wounded little bird before, but now I know she can’t be trusted. She came to my place looking for the girl. Threatened you if I didn’t bring the kid to her.”
A chill settled into Micha’s bones. “Is she responsible for the stalking?”
“No. The stalker is personal to you. And Sabine isn’t related to Simon Jax in any way, But Micha, there is one thing.”
Her stomach rolled when she noted the grim set of his lips. “What?”
“She is responsible for the video. She wanted me to come to heel.”
Micha crossed her arms. “What the hell is wrong with that woman?”
“You don’t even want to know.”
“You really think she’s capable of hurting that kid?”
Caleb merged out of the fast lane. “I don’t know. There are a lot of things about Sabine that I never suspected. If my hunch is correct, the kid is the key to finally finding out what happened that day.”