by Ryan Rimmel
The unit contained mostly spearmen, armed with short spears that were maybe six feet in length. They were using their weapons to poke at the villagers on the walls, while other soldiers tried to use debris to climb over.
With my Mana pool mostly depleted, all we could do was a Stamina based attack. I kicked my heels into Badgelor’s sides.
“Try that again, and yer pulling back stumps,” stated the badger.
“Well, how am I supposed to signal you to go forward?” I grumbled.
“We can speak telepathically, you dolt,” replied Badgelor.
“Charge?” I asked.
By the time we charged, the spearmen had figured out what we planned to do. They barely had enough time to form ranks, laying out a line of spears before us. If a horse had seen such a formation, they would have balked, refusing to charge into such a mess. Badgelor looked at them like they were insignificant pests.
Interestingly, only about twenty troopers had formed up, as we charged in. The remaining thirty soldiers were still trying to break into the village. They seemed content to ignore us. Badgelor slammed into the spears with little regard to them. The short spears were not large enough for their wielders to properly brace, nor were they long enough to pierce through Badgelor’s fur.
“Pincushion Defense,” yelled someone. Instead of Badgelor smashing through the thin ranks of spears, they somehow stopped him. That wasn’t to say they did Damage or that several soldiers didn’t get knocked senseless by his claws. However, Badgelor didn’t instantly smash through them.
“Are you sure we need these soldiers?” asked Badgelor. He did another clawed swipe at the enemy, knocking two more troops aside.
I grinned, launching myself from his oversized head. I was aiming for where the lieutenant was standing, since I couldn’t attack him with a ranged attack. Fortunately, nothing was stopping me from getting up close and personal with him. I held up my blade and prepared a Falling Star Strike, descending like a comet straight into another wall of spears.
They had formed ranks unnaturally fast. Instead of landing in a disorganized mass of soldiers, I landed, point-first, into six different spears. They aimed their pincushioning effect right at my gut, which both countered my attack and drove my full weight into their sharp, metal tips.
● You have suffered 48 points of Damage.
By dumping a horrific amount of Stamina into Mitigate, I was able to mostly resist the Damage. A conventional spear strike normally wouldn’t have bothered me much. However, getting my maximum vertical height before landing on six of them was a bit much, even for me.
The lieutenant, who I determined was an asshole, smirked.
I executed Cleave, breaking through enough spears that I was able to slip free from the shafts. I landed on my feet right next to the aforementioned asshole. His smirk faded, as I executed Hack and Slash. Several of his soldiers closed in on us. Shit. Hack and Slash required me to spread out my attacks over multiple targets, if more than one was available.
I was going to have to switch tactics. Most sensible people disliked being on the receiving end of a Powerful Blow. I didn’t try to kill anyone, but anyone I hit was out of the fight. Unfortunately, they were not under any such tactical constraints. They had decided my body was an excellent place to put their spears' tips.
Suddenly, I was surrounded. While I’d been in combat with a variety of melee weapons before, I was going to put spears down as my least favorite. Fantasy weapons were overrated. A long stick with a point on it was hard to get around, especially in numbers.
With most of my Duelist attacks on cooldown, I had to get creative. One of the spearmen struck at me, so I executed my Riposte talent. It yanked me to the left and allowed me to land a Powerful Blow against my would-be attacker. Again, it wasn’t enough to kill him, but, unsurprisingly, most normal people stopped fighting after suffering a ghastly head wound.
That put me at the edge of the formation. I was able to use Quick Strikes, combined with Powerful Blows, to smash into the formation several times. I usually attacked with my Duelist talents, so it was unusual that I used my Sword skill this extensively. Unfortunately, some skills were less useful in mass combat than in regular battles. Against opponents of these soldiers’ levels, one of my Powerful Blows should have sent them flying. Instead, it just jolted them within their formation.
Fortunately, now that I wasn’t getting attacked on every side, I was able to use my Fancy Footwork to avoid most of their strikes. However, I was going to have to wait until my cooldowns expired to press the attack again. Unfortunately, the lieutenant seemed to realize that. The troops were working to press me up against the wall.
It wouldn’t work. I could jump the wall, but that would be more Stamina from an increasingly shrinking pool. I also couldn’t be certain of a warm reception from the villagers.
Then, the lieutenant vanished. Badgelor had broken through the spear line and grabbed him with one massive paw. The previously reliable spearmen suddenly wavered. My cooldowns expired, and everything proceeded as expected. Unlike a formation led by multiple sergeants, the whole unit collapsed when the lieutenant dropped.
I activated Lunge, impaling the closest spearman in the shoulder. I followed that attack up with a Cleave, which opened up space in their formation. Within seconds, I had struck fifteen of them with my blade, each strike opening up massive, bleeding wounds. A few tried to move in to counterattack, but they came in without command. I sliced into them.
Suddenly, it was over. The entire formation dissolved, as the remaining troopers routed away from us. Badgelor tossed the lieutenant’s limp body against the wall and looked down at me.
“Don’t try anything from the air against spears, Dum Dum,” he said flatly.
I heard Shart laughing hysterically in my head. “No shit,” I hissed. “No one would be that stupid twice.” I cast a quick Heal Damage on the lieutenant and another nearby soldier, before hopping onto Badgelor’s back. The lieutenant was much more durable than a sergeant would have been. His wounds quickly began to knit with my Healing magic. Next, I cast Regeneration on myself. I would have healed Badgelor, as well, but the arse hadn’t taken any significant Damage.
We were moving at a good clip toward the next unit of soldiers. I glanced over at the commander. She was trying to reform what remained of the company of spearmen we had just defeated. We hadn’t killed any of them outright, though I doubted they would thank me for that. I’d injured more than half of them. The guy who I’d impaled was going to be downright cross with me.
“Breath it in, Jim,” stated Badgelor, as we got closer.
I sniffed slightly. The smell was unpleasant, full of burning buildings and death. “What exactly am I doing?”
“Use Scent and focus on the soldiers. What can you tell me?” asked Badgelor. He sounded like a patient elementary school teacher.
I tried to concentrate on my sniffing. It seemed crazy, but I did have the Scent skill. Additionally, all my Explorer talents focused on my nose. As I breathed in, I noticed something strange. There was a faint, intoxicating aroma that grew stronger the closer we got to the troops.
“Fear,” grinned Badgelor. “It’s the smell of fear. Use your fancy acrobatics here.”
The troopers formed up into ranks again. This time, they were shaped like a bowl. Badgelor happily charged them. The front line had shields at the ready, like that was going to stop the badger. He smashed straight into them, leaving most struggling to stay on their feet. The remainder went for Badgelor’s backside. Their strategy wasn’t great, considering five of Badgelor’s six ends were pointy. Badgelor was just as inclined to use a rear leg to send a soldier flying as he was to bite someone with enough force to mold their helmet over their eyes.
I, meanwhile, was on my second attempt at a Falling Star Strike. I was hoping dearly I would have more luck facing the swords than I had with the spears. As I flew, I realized what the problem had been with my previous attempt. The spearmen had, more or less,
just jammed the butts of their weapons into the ground and ducked. I had done most of the work, impaling myself, like the true dumbass Shart was convinced I was. The swordsmen, however, had formed into a tortoiseshell formation with swords and shields. My Powerful Falling Star Strike recognized their pattern as stable enough ground to activate.
The shield underneath me exploded into flinders. The trooper’s arm holding it was also obliterated, as the pressure wave of my impact blew out in all directions. It was arguable that the midair detonation was worse, as it left more energy to blast into them.
Powerful Blow may not have had enough umph on its own to send soldiers flying, but it absolutely did when used with my Falling Star Strike. The troops adjacent to me went flying backward, many of them slamming into other nearby troopers. Their formation was abruptly destroyed.
This unit’s lieutenant had made a mistake. She was a higher level and could stand firm, even as I blasted the troopers around her away. That left her nice and exposed. I executed a Hack and Slash against her as a single target. Using the flat of my blade, I hit her five times in rapid succession. With the final ringing hit to her helmet, the woman fell to her knees. Then, she flopped to the ground, unconscious.
For one glorious instant, I was a total badass, as the remaining soldiers dropped their weapons and ran. Then, I noticed their commander, an adventurer, charging toward me, her lance aimed squarely at my chin. As I adjusted my position to receive the charge, I noticed the other commander, also an adventurer, racing toward me, as well. His mace was drawn, and he did not look pleased.
“Well, that sucks,” stated Shart.
“No, it's going to be hilarious,” I replied. Using my trick normally reserved for catching arrows, I caught the lance's tip and drove it into the ground.
She pole vaulted off her horse, flipped once in mid-air, and landed in a roll. That forced the other adventurer to divert his attack. She came to her feet with an expression of pure murder on her face.
“What the hell do you think you are doing?” she screamed. “You are ruining a magnificent battle!”
“We don’t need any pissant Grebthar wannabe butting his way into this,” exclaimed the other adventurer.
“You two are raiding a village. People are dying,” I growled.
“They are commoners. Who cares?” stated Shelly, as I finally bothered to read their name tags.
“Laying it on a bit thick, old man,” grumbled Jerry. He adjusted his movements to get around my flank.
“Weren’t you two fighting just a second ago?” I growled, watching both of them.
“We were fighting a recognized battle in the civil war! This is the Battle for Aetna,” stated Shelly.
“Roll credits,” yelled Shart, I groaned.
“That’s nice,” grinned Jerry, continuing to move into my flank. I was compensating for that, making sure he didn’t have a good line on me. A more experienced fighter would have realized that and kept stationary, waiting for an opening. Instead, he was blatantly telegraphing his intentions, which let me plan a defense.
“Explain, or I’ll cut you in half,” I said calmly.
“Explain what?” growled Shelly. Before I could answer, she executed a Thrust. I parried it quickly, even as Jerry came in from the side. I used Fancy Footwork to position Shelly into the path of his attack. He pulled his strike. He had to; his only other option was to hit her squarely in the face with his mace. Probably not his best bet.
“Why are you fighting?” I clarified, moving away. They both started advancing toward me again.
“Because it's this season of the Civil War of Falcon. Are you daft?” asked Jerry.
“Wait, you are just fighting because there’s a civil war? Don’t you care who wins?” I questioned.
“Of course not,” replied Shelly. “My family supports the duke. Jerry is with the duchess. Eventually, one of them will become the next ruler. This happens every decade or so. There is no sense getting killed over a simple dynastic struggle. You aren’t even wearing heraldry. Who are you fighting for?”
“I’m fighting for justice,” I said. Both guffawed.
“A modern-day Grebthar!” exclaimed Shelly, rolling her eyes. “Let me tell you something, Curious Puppy. I don’t care how tough you are or how big your badger is. We don’t take shit from the likes of you.”
“He has a War Badger, though. I’ve never even seen one up close,” stated Jerry, turning around. He quickly discovered that, while we were talking, Badgelor had walked right up behind them. The badger’s snout was inches away from Jerry’s face. His next quick discovery was that Badgelor had a whole bunch of really sharp teeth.
Jerry jerked, which caused Shelly to turn in his direction. With her attention divided, it was child’s play to strike her wrist. I used enough force to knock her weapon free. As Jerry recognized me as an actual threat, it was nothing for Badgelor to step on him. Jerry was driven face-first into the dirt. Badgelor stepped on Shelly’s weapon for good measure, leaving her more permanently disarmed than I had. My sword was also at her neck.
“This is stupid. You two children need to go home,” I growled.
“Like hell! Who do you think you are to order us about, the king?” growled Shelly, standing with her spine erect. Jerry said something, too, but he was face down in the mud. He could have been pleading for help or making death threats; it all would have sounded the same.
I reached forward and grabbed her by the armor, then lifted. Lifting heavy objects was a combination of your Strength stat and your Stamina pool. I had a massive pool of Stamina that had regenerated, and I was well and truly done with this. “No, I am Jim, the Curious Puppy. You need to learn to mind your manners.”
● Intimidation check: critically successful, Rank Up! New rank: Advanced!
“Sorry, Daddy, I’ve been naughty,” she hissed out with wild eyes. That was the actual reply used in the stupid Curious Puppy books, when Jim taught someone a lesson they should already know. I dropped her, and she staggered backward. She fell to the ground and scampered away.
“You will swear to leave this village alone, or, so help me, I’ll make you regret it,” I growled.
Shelly nodded and swore an oath before dashing away to her horse. Badgelor removed his foot, and Jerry quickly rose to look around. The adventurer stood still for a moment before glaring at me. “And if I refuse, just what are you going to do about it?”
Chapter 42 – A greater army
“How many different kinds of knots do you know?” muttered Jerry, as we continued walking down the path. The villagers at Aetna had kindly pointed it out to me. At least, it was the direction they thought the ruined temple was in. My Sense Motive skill informed me it was a guess, at best.
Jerry was the first part of my small army plan. After casting Regeneration on the soldier whose arm I had removed, I’d gathered up Jerry’s soldiers. We were now marching toward the possible direction of the ruined temple.
“Enough,” I said and stopped. The unit cried out “Halt,” and all the soldiers halted in good order. Jerry, who was now in his underwear, looked back at them. Then, he returned his gaze to me.
“You have the War Leader talent,” he said, looking uncomfortable. “I don’t even have any ranks in that skill.”
I looked down on him from Badgelor, trying to keep up the impression of majesty without rolling my eyes. It was a challenge. War Leader was the talent you used to command troops. I was actually up to rank 5 in War Leader, after my last set of bouts with the trolls in Windfall. They were worth a lot of experience.
However, the only way to earn War Leader experience was to fight. The steeper the odds, the better your gains. Jerry had been fighting what amounted to scripted wars. If you had no real chance of dying, there was only a minimal experience gain.
Turning back to face the road, I noticed the slight glare on Jerry’s face. Following his gaze, I saw he was staring at my wrists. I’d kept his bracers, because I liked bracers. His were far better than my
old ones. Jerry looked positively miserable. Stealing adventurer’s gear just wasn’t done. Of course, I’d only done it to get a rise out of him. That, and I really liked bracers.
“I’m bored with this. Do you have any useful information in that thick skull of yours? If not, I may feed you to my badger.”
Badgelor rolled his eyes. He wouldn’t eat something as scrawny as Jerry, but I didn’t need to tell Jerry that. The adventurer paled. Badgelor yawned in his direction, showing off row after row of sharp badger fangs.
“You asked about the temple. I know something about that,” replied Jerry quickly.
“Which is?” I asked.
“Well, my commanding officer probably knows right where it is,” stated Jerry.
“The duchess?” I questioned. When you hear of heads of state fighting a war, you just don’t think of them doing it right outside your borders. Of course, Windfall was a week or so away, and I was fighting in battles. Then, there was the war between TimSimons and HarCharles. I needed to deal with that on my other border.
“No, Commander Lorraine Channing Wells,” stated Jerry confidently. “We are standing in her fief. If anyone knows of an ancient temple around here, it would be her,” Jerry said.
I pinged Shart. “Have you found the stupid temple yet?”
“I told you I couldn’t locate it very well. I’m closer than when I started, but the search area is still several leagues across,” stated Shart. “The burning villages up north are helping me lock it down, though.”
“Fine,” I said, looking down at Jerry. My towering perch on Badgelor really did make me feel majestic. “Where is she?”