by Devon Monk
The dragon pig growled again, but it was all vibration. No sound.
“That’s good,” I said. “You’re good.”
Ryder muscled Spud down the hall toward the spare room.
Vivian straightened. “What are you—can I hold it?” If she suspected the pig was anything other than a pig, she didn’t show it.
“You don’t want to hold it.”
“But I do. I really do. Look at the sweet little piggy-poo face.”
I felt the dragon pig tense in my arms, and I knew if I handed it over to that woman she would be burned to a crispy snack.
“It pees.”
The dragon pig huffed a weird little oink that sounded like outrage.
“Oh, I’m sure it’s fine.”
“No, no,” I pulled the pig back, tucking it into my side in a football hold. “Anyone who picks it up gets wet. Dripping.”
“It’s not peeing on you.”
“That’s because…” Warm liquid trickled down my shirt and pants.
Ew. I didn’t even know the dragon knew how to pee. It had never peed in all the time it had been with us. Which might be why it just kept on peeing. And peeing.
Gross.
“Oh, that’s hilarious!” She clapped. “Where is my camera? I need a picture of this.”
“Gotta clean it up!” I shouted.
I jogged down the hall to the bathroom, passing Ryder who was talking Spud into staying in the small spare room we used as an office. There was a bed in there for him and the dragon pig, several of their favorite toys, and a water dish.
“Stay here, boy. I’ll get you dinner in a minute,” Ryder said.
I pushed into the bathroom and plopped the pig down in the sink.
“Oh my gods. That was disgusting!”
The dragon pig growled and stomped its little piggy feet pacing a circle in the sink.
“You didn’t have to pee on me,” I hissed.
It stopped pacing and planted two front feet on the edge of the sink. Smoke curled up from its nostrils and it rumbled at me.
“Don’t give me that look.” I shucked off my shirt and got a washcloth wet from the tub spigot. “It was the first thing I could think of.”
It snarled.
“No,” I said. “Because you were already growling at her and pigs don’t growl.”
It grumped while I finished washing away dragon pee, which was colorless and smelled like burnt marshmallow.
Knuckles softly rapped on the door. “Got you a new shirt.” Ryder opened the door and stood there, grinning.
I grabbed his wrist and pulled him into the bathroom. “Not that I’d ever say no to a quicky,” he said, crowding all up in my space, “but we have company.” He pressed the bright orange Henley into my hands, and stepped back.
“Hey, buddy,” he said to dragon pig. “Nice work out there.”
Its little curly tail wagged.
I shrugged into the shirt and rucked the sleeves up to my elbows. “She needs to get out of here,” I whispered.
“Motel for the night. Sand Garden?”
“Yes. She wants to do a ride along.”
“I can handle that.”
“She is not riding along with you to spy on this town.”
“You want her spying on the town on her own? Because that’s what she’ll do. She’ll poke around until she finds something we can’t explain. And then the entire DoPP will be down our throats.”
I ran through options, trying to come up with other ways to deal with her. But his idea of basically letting her think she was seeing all of our town while actually being babysat by someone who could steer her away from the worst of it was the best chance we had of convincing her we were just a normal, boring, ordinary beach town.
“Fuck,” I whispered.
“It will be okay.”
“How long?”
“With her? Week, tops.”
“Fuck.”
“But hey, at least I won’t be focusing on the wedding so much.”
“Not funny.”
He shrugged and from the purse of his lips and the twinkle in his eyes, I knew he thought he was hilarious.
“A little funny,” he said.
“Are we sharing secrets?” Vivian called out. “I love secrets. Did Ryder tell you about that night we both flew into New Orleans and there weren’t any rooms left? About how we ended up sleeping on the couch in suite of a very nice older couple who liked to swing?”
I raised an eyebrow. Ryder’s face slashed red at the cheeks.
“It was a weird weekend,” he muttered.
“You’ll have to tell me sometime.”
I turned to the dragon pig. “No more peeing to the rescue, got it?”
It squeaked.
I picked it up and put it on the floor, then opened the bathroom door. “Off to bed,” I told it. I moved to follow, bur Ryder caught my hand, and pulled gently.
“Nothing happened between us. She not my type. I’ve never trusted her. She has too many secrets and hidden agendas.”
“I know,” I said. “We got this.” I squeezed his hand, he squeezed back. Then I walked over to the spare room to make sure dragon pig was settled.
Dragon pig was in the middle of its little bed, kicking toys across the room. Spud picked up the stuffed octopus and carried it over, wagging his tail.
The pig grumbled, but accepted the toy, then dropped down on the bed like an angry little pink rock. Spud curled up around it.
I shut the door.
“Are we doing something naughty?” Vivian strolled into the hallway, all loose and cat-like, her gaze sharp.
She was looking for something. She was looking to make trouble between Ryder and me, sure, though I didn’t know what her angle was there. We were in love. We were living together. We were going to get married.
She was out of luck if she thought she could drive a wedge between us.
But it was clear she was still a hunter looking for living breathing beings who were not supposed to exist.
Hell, maybe she thought I was something supernatural. Being the Bridge for the god powers to be set down and stored was a power no other human had.
A chill washed down my spine as it suddenly occurred to me that I could be the something she wanted to tag and bag and throw into a governmental test lab.
Yeah, that wasn’t going to happen.
“We were just talking over the motel options,” I said. “Sand Garden is the best.”
Ryder stepped out of the bathroom. “It will have a room open for sure. Need directions?”
She bit her bottom lip, then smiled. “In a town this small? I don’t think I’ll have any trouble finding it. But,” she looked up through her eyelashes at him, “I still haven’t had dinner. I wouldn’t want Delaney to get jealous, me keeping you all to myself, but maybe you and I could get a bite to eat and catch up?”
Someone else might not have seen it, the slight tightening of Ryder’s stance, the way he hitched one shoulder down just that smallest amount. But I’d been staring at Ryder for years.
When he was a boy, and the way he threw a rock in the water made me wonder how he could be so strong and amazing.
When he was a gangly teen, and his voice wobbled and his laugh deepened.
When he’d broadened, put on muscles and height and fallen into the easy manner that drew people to him like bees to nectar.
He didn’t like this woman, and just like he’d told me, he didn’t trust her.
“Or,” I said, “you two could catch up tomorrow. You must be tired from your long drive.”
She raised her eyebrows and gave me a look of mock-shock. “How do you know I had a long drive?”
“Your car has California plates.”
“Maybe I’ve been in Oregon for a while.”
“Have you?”
She laughed, and it sounded forced. “No, not really. I drove straight through, and I am awfully hungry. Are there any cute little diners you can take me to, RyRy? Please
feed the little birdy?”
She reached over and held on to his forearm. Laying a claim on him. Exerting her control.
Ryder was a lot less subtle than I’d been. He picked up her perfectly manicured hand and dropped it off his arm.
“Delaney and I had plans,” he said.
“No, that’s okay,” I interrupted, because Ryder was right. She should not be left to wander around Ordinary alone. Not until I got the word out that there was a hunter in our midst. Ryder taking her to dinner was the best move. He’d keep an eye on her, and I could get the info spreading through town.
“I’m probably going to turn in early after I do a little paperwork anyway.” I put my palm on the small of Ryder’s back and gave him a little push toward her so he’d know I was on for his plan.
“You want me to bring you back something to eat?” he asked.
“Naw. I’ll just make a sandwich.”
“Or that pie,” Vivian said. “Although how sad is it, you sitting here all alone eating an entire pie while I’m out on the town with your handsome boyfriend?”
“Fiancé,” I corrected. “You two have fun.” I gave her a big ol’ smile which made her frown, so I kept smiling. “Don’t eat anything I wouldn’t eat.”
Ryder tossed a bemused look my way, but got moving.
“Let’s take two cars,” he was saying as he ushered her out the door. “That way you can head straight to your motel after.”
“Boo. What if little birdy wants a night cap?”
“Or worms for breakfast?” I muttered. Apparently, a little too loudly.
They both turned to me.
Vivian burst out laughing. “You want a little sleep over, RyRy?” she asked. “You could give me a nice juicy worm for breakfast.”
Oh, for the love of gods. This woman.
Ryder did a top-notch job of not rolling his eyes.
“Or,” Ryder said, “we could meet you for breakfast.”
“Forget the worm comment,” I mumbled.
“Of course,” she said, her hand landing on Ryder’s forearm again. “She is just adorably awkward, isn’t she? I didn’t know you had a thing for small town girls.”
“Just the one,” he said, his voice growly enough to make my stomach flip. “You better leave me some of that pie,” he said to me.
“You mean the key lime I picked up from Hogan’s? Your favorite pie? That pie?”
He groaned a little. “Yes. That pie.”
“I’ll do what I can, but I’m awfully hungry. I missed my chance at kebobs.”
He stepped up to me and kissed me hard, then growled over my mouth. “You’ll pay for this.”
Then he was gone, shoulders square, easy-likeable-guy smile on his face, following Vivian out the door.
I stood there for a moment, my fingers pressed to my lips, savoring the heat of that kiss.
Chapter Fifteen
I opened the door for Spud and the dragon pig. “You can come on out. She’s gone.”
My phone buzzed and I was not surprised to see Myra’s number.
“Hey,” I said.
“So what’s going on?” she asked distractedly. I heard a low voice in the background, and then something that sounded an awful lot like a kiss. At least my sister got to spend her evening with the man of her dreams.
“There’s a monster hunter in town.”
“What?” A shuffle of sounds came through the phone, then a soft whump of a pillow, and a deep chuckle. “Okay, you have my attention. Where are you? Are you okay?”
“I’m at home. I’m fine. Ryder’s taking her out to dinner, then getting her settled in the Sand Garden for the night.”
“Her? So our monster hunter is a woman? Is she a paranormal investigator? Ghost hunter?”
“She works for DoPP.”
“Well, shit.”
“Yeah.”
“Why is she here now?”
“She used to work with Ryder. I came home, and she was out on the deck giggling and flirting with him.”
“That bitch.”
Gotta love sister loyalty.
“She’s a piece of work. I wouldn’t trust her near my silver.”
“What does Ryder think is going on?”
“We didn’t have much time to talk and didn’t want to let her out in the town on her own. Since she,” I pitched my voice into babytalk, “just wants to catch up with my RyRy.”
“Gag.”
“He took her to have dinner. I’m guessing the Blue Owl, but he didn’t say.”
“Okay, so which part of town do you want me to cover?”
“I’ll call Bertie, and that should take care of half the town right there. But we’ll need to make sure the gods, and all the anti-socials know to keep a low profile.”
“I’ll take south, put Jean on door-to-door east. Where do you want Hatter and Shoe?”
“Give them north. Kelby can door-to-door west. And I’ll talk to Than. See if he wants to pitch in or lay low.”
“Want my vote?” she asked.
“Lay low?”
“Subterranean.”
“I’ll see if I can convince him.”
“Good. Okay, call if you need anything.”
“Will do.”
I needed to call Bertie and have her tap into her massive list of the supernaturals in town who she conscripted for community events. She kept email lists, social media profiles, and good old-fashioned phone trees memorized. Telling Bertie to find people was like asking a fish if it would enjoy a dip in the water.
So I cut a hunk of pie, then dialed our local Valkyrie.
Bertie got the word out so fast, I wasn’t sure any of the rest of us needed to go door-to-door. But the safety of the people in my town wasn’t something I took lightly, so I was out doing my part of the knocking.
I drove up to Old Rossi’s first, knowing he could spread the word to his clan of vampires faster than I’d be able to do it by checking in on each vampire one-at-a-time. I knocked on his door, and was surprised when Rossi himself opened it.
“Delaney. You’re working late.”
Rossi was rangy as a runner or yoga instructor. His dark hair had a streak of silver spreading back from his temple, which was new since he’d been almost killed by Lavius, an ancient evil who had been more-or-less his brother.
He wore a patch made of very soft, probably expensive, material over his left eye which he’d lost in that battle. His right eye was filled with a deep light that brightened the ice-blue of it. With the soft gray pants and loose, cream-colored tunic with embroidery on the cuffs, he looked like a rich retired hippie.
“Your voice sounds better,” I noted.
He leaned his shoulder against the door jam, his glittering eye taking on the growing shadows behind me.
“Thank you. Is this a social visit? At this time of night? What would your fiancé say?”
“He’d say I work too many hours, but he knows this time it isn’t my fault.”
“Is it ever?” he asked, holding back a smile.
“Sometimes,” I said, with a shrug. “But not tonight.”
“Come on in.”
He moved so I could step in, and shut the door behind me.
The living room was scattered with comfortable couches and chairs, rich patterned rugs, and art on the walls that didn’t look fussy, but probably cost a couple arms and legs. Three of the Rossi clan were gathered on the couch and a chair, a table with a complicated looking board game set up between them.
Senta, who worked on our emergency response team, and Keenan who often pulled night shifts at the lumber yard, came into the room carrying sodas and bags of chips tucked under their arms.
The Rossis usually got their sustenance from the blood drive bags, but even vampires got the munchies.
“Chief.” Senta tipped her chin at me, her silver-white hair swinging with the movement. Leon lifted a couple fingers and the others in the living room raised a hand my way without looking.
I waved back to
the crew.
It was great to see his family here, relaxing and hanging out. It was even better to see that not one of them were hovering near him, snarling at anything that approached.
They’d nearly lost him. We’d all nearly lost him. But he’d finally turned the healing corner. He looked much more solid. Strong. The relief from every vampire in the room was palpable.
“Did you hear we have a monster hunter in town?” I asked.
“Yes.”
“Bertie, right? She is fast.”
“It’s a requirement in her line of work.”
I didn’t know if he meant dragging dead heroes off the battleground or dragging volunteers into community events. Both worked.
“Vivian Dunn,” he said. “Is she government?”
“That’s her last name?”
“Bertie,” he said.
“Okay, so that’s her last name. Yeah, Vivian will tell you she handled interior design for that company Ryder worked for in Chicago, but now she’s found journalism and wants to write about all the quirky little backwater towns she travels through. To make people happy.”
“Which is utter yak shit. Do you know if she’s looking for something in particular?”
“I don’t know if she was tipped off, or if she just decided to roll through Ordinary because Ryder was here. She might have been sent to find out why he quit the DoPP. But why now? At the worst damn time, too.”
“Well, not the worst,” he said. “Unless Bertie’s throwing a three-ring circus again?”
The vampires snorted.
“Oh, gods, no. Can you imagine?”
“I don’t have to. I was there for the last one. Roselord the Ravishing.” He made a loopy hand wave from forehead to waist amid several gagging sounds from the peanut gallery.
“Dare I guess what your act was?”
“Oh, I hope you dare.”
“Striptease.”
That got one bark of a laugh out of Senta. She gave me a thumbs-up while crunching through a chip.
“It could have been,” he said, pitching his voice to the others in the room. “But no. I was a hypnotist.”
“Holy crap, I bet you blew them away.”
“I would have. If your grandmother hadn’t stepped in. She drew the line at my suggestions that each person drop off a few bucks every month to the Rossi Family Farm.”