A Reason to Leave

by Melissa Ellen

  I bit my lip in anticipation as he slowly crawled over me. My eager hands slid up his body, locking around his neck as his face hovered above me. He was naked. And he was pressed against me. And for some insane reason, I wasn’t naked. Before I could right the situation, he kissed me, causing my eyes to flutter shut and my mind to slip off into the abyss.

  He licked, kissed and nipped his way down my body, releasing my breasts from my bra before continuing his course to where I was already hot and aching for him. His lips danced around my navel as he unbuttoned and unzipped my jeans, pulling them from my body along with my lace panties.

  His warm breath hit where I wanted him most, sending my hips up to him with a whimper. He kissed the side of my hip, pinning them back to the bed, before moving his assault to my apex. Licking. Sucking. Bringing my body to the brink. It felt entirely too good, but I still wanted more. I wanted him inside me, but he was hell bent on making me beg. And I wasn’t too proud to do just that. I was desperate for him.

  “Please,” I let out my breathy plea, fisting the sheets at my side.

  “I’m going to take my time with you, princess, so don’t bother begging… We’re doing this my way.”

  “You’re way is going to kill me.”

  I felt his mouth grin against my skin as he kissed his way back north before landing on my boobs. He groped and teased them with his tongue. Every move he made was deliberate, firm, yet gentle, despite his earlier warnings that he wouldn’t be. He was savoring my body, overwhelming it with desire and desperation. Obviously, his new favorite pastime.

  I felt him press against my core, as his face appeared over mine, holding himself at my entrance. I wanted to push my hips up to relieve the aching inside, but tampered the need when he spoke.

  “Tell me you’re on birth control,” he pleaded huskily, brushing my hair to the side of my face as his other hand laid splayed on my hip, pinning it in place.

  I nodded, biting my bottom lip, “But that doesn’t protect me from other things.”

  “I’m clean. I’ve been tested and I’ve always used a condom. And I will if you want me to. But I want to feel you, Valerie. All of you.”

  I wanted him to feel me. And I wanted to feel him too, without anything between us. I had always used a condom in the past and despite my better judgement, I suddenly didn’t want to ever use one with him. The thought scared me and made me feel safe at the same time.

  I brushed the back of my fingers along the scruff that covered his jaw, studying him. He was giving me something he had never given anyone before me. I wasn’t naive enough to think he hadn’t been with numerous women. But they had never had this Liam. This Liam was mine. This Liam was gentle, caring and raw.

  “Okay,” I agreed.

  He hastily pressed his lips against mine as his hips thrusted forward inside of me, sending a wake or ecstasy through my body. I dug my fingers into his broad shoulders as my body formed to his, adapting to the pleasure that overtook it.

  We moved in tandem, our bodies synchronizing. I wrapped my arms and legs around him, pushing my body upward to get closer. He moved to one forearm, wrapping the other around my waist, rolling us, keeping us connected.

  I pressed my hands to his firm chest, sitting up as I straddled him, circling my hips, feeling empowered by him. “Fuck, princess,” he let out a guttural growl, sitting up to take my breast into his mouth. I clung to him as we both found the release he had been depriving us from for days. Days that felt like years. I panted his name as my body quaked, and he growled his own release.

  I went limp in his arms as he held me, rolling me back to the bed. He laid over me like a security blanket. His head lifted from the crook of my neck, where he had it tucked while we came down from our high.

  He had a shit-eating grin plastered on his face, revealing that cute dimple that had me instantly ready for round two. I grinned back. He kissed the tip of my nose, before peeling his body from mine, lying onto his back. I frowned at the loss of his weight.

  “I should go.”

  Wait. What? I didn’t respond. I wasn’t even sure I heard him right. If he was saying what I thought, then his need for a brisk departure burned. He rolled to his side, looking down at me. His smile dropped when he saw the look on my face.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Why are you trying to leave?”

  “I don’t do overnights.”

  Right. The hard, distant Liam was resurfacing.

  “Wow,” I said, shaking my head with incredulity. “So, now what? I’m just like all the slutty groupies you sleep with?”

  His jaw ticked and his eyes darkened, “No.”

  “What’s next? If I’m lucky, you’ll screw me in the storage closet after the next concert.” My voice raised an octave. I was seething.

  “Stop,” he warned me. I could tell he was struggling to keep his guard up, so I pushed him more, forcing him to lower it.

  “Then don’t compare me to the other women you have been with.”

  “I wasn’t.”

  “You were,” I looked at him pointedly. “The moment you decided you were leaving. If you leave, you’re cheapening everything that just happened between us. And I won’t be able to forgive you for that.”

  He closed his eyes and let out a heavy sigh before reopening them. “You want me to stay.”

  I nodded, even though it wasn’t a question.

  “Then I’ll stay,” he said, caressing my face.

  He leaned in and kissed me gently. A kiss that was laced with an apology. I pulled him closer, deepening the kiss. He rolled to his back, pulling me with him. I rested my head on his chest and threw my leg over his as he held me close. We relaxed into the silence, letting the earlier anger dissipate. Then my brain decided to return.

  “Liam?” I asked barely above a whisper.

  “Yes, princess?” he asked as his fingers trailed lightly up and down my back.

  “The day I met you on the highway…did you already know who I was?” I had hesitated bringing this up. But curiosity had me wondering if he knew me from the tabloids.

  “Yes.”

  “How?”

  “The day you dropped your car off at the shop was the first time I saw you. You were the most gorgeous woman I had ever seen. I had to know your name. I looked at the paperwork after you left.”

  I looked up at him, surprised by his admission. He was staring at the ceiling, but his eyes turned to me with my movement.

  “Why were you so cold towards me?”

  “Pillow talk wasn’t part of the deal,” he said attempting to shut my line of questioning down.

  “It is now.”

  “Go to sleep, princess. Unless you prefer me to leave.”

  The humor in his voice told me his threat wasn’t real, but I knew I had pushed him enough for one day. I would let it go. For now.

  The thought that he might have an issue with my upbringing and judged me for it was simmering in the back of my mind. My heart was already falling, but my brain was warning me to be cautious. That deep seeded mistrust was pushing to the forefront. It had me feeling unsettled.

  I rolled away from him to my side, suddenly feeling I needed to distance myself. His hulky arms wrapped around me, pulling my backside into his front.

  “Where do you think you’re going?”

  “I didn’t think cuddling was part of the deal either,” I snapped at him.

  He chuckled, finding my sudden bad mood amusing, “It is now, princess.” He kissed the crown of my head, instantly relaxing my body and mind.

  I closed my eyes, forcing myself to get out of my head. I breathed in his scent and let his steady breathing lull me to sleep.

  CHAPTER 8

  I hummed my happiness in my sleepy state as dreams of Liam’s hard, naked body and grinning face sizzled in my brain. I reached my hand blindly across the bed feeling for that particular body. My eyes shot open.

  I turned my head to the empty side of the bed where Liam should have st
ill been lying. Gone. I looked at the night stand for his things. Gone. He had left me. Alone. No good-bye. No sweet kiss. No “I’ll call you later.” Just gone. Like it never happened.

  “That mother…that son of a…ugh,” I growled, slamming my arms against the mattress. “Jerk!”

  “Everything okay, princess?” Liam’s voice interrupted my angry rant and thoughts of plotting his murder.

  I shot up ramrod straight into a sitting position - the bed sheet dropping around my waist. He was leaning his perfect, half-cladded body against the open door frame, holding a coffee mug in his hand, a smile on his face and an amused gleam in his eyes.

  “You’re still here?” I asked more as a rhetorical question, unable to believe he was standing there, looking content and gorgeous in only his jeans.

  “I am.”

  “You’re shirtless.”

  His eyes ignited as they focused on my chest. “So are you, princess,” he said hungrily, pulling his bottom lip between his teeth, releasing it slowly.

  I looked down, realizing I was still naked and my perky boobs were on display for his viewing pleasure. “Oh,” I blushed, grabbing the sheet, tucking it under my armpits to conceal myself.

  “Nuh, uh,” he shook his head. “Don’t cover those beauties up.” His voice came out husky as he stalked towards me. He set his coffee down on the table before crawling over me, forcing my back onto the mattress as he positioned himself between my legs.

  “I thought you left.” I looked up into his captivating greys as he drifted above me, holding himself on his forearms.

  After seeing his personal items and jeans gone, I didn’t think to look for his shirt or shoes. Both of which were still laying on the floor, just out of my view.

  “No. But I need to go soon. I’ve got to get to the shop.”

  “I don’t want you to go, yet.” I traced my finger along the black lines of the tattoo that stretched across his bicep. I wondered the story behind it.

  “I don’t want to either,” he said, giving me a swift, soft kiss.

  “When can I see you again?”

  “I’m not sure,” he frowned. “We leave tomorrow morning for a show out of town.”

  I turned away from him, discontented with his answer. If I hadn’t memorized his event schedule for the next week…okay two weeks, I would have thought he was brushing me off.

  “What about tonight?” I asked hopefully, looking back at him.

  “I have practice with the guys after work.”

  “Okay.” My delivery of the one word was short and tight. I was trying not to let his busy schedule hurt my confidence, but that was easier said than done. I didn’t want to be that girl. Needy after one night of mind-blowing sex. I wasn’t even sure what this was.

  “Come watch us.”

  “I don’t want to distract you,” I lied.

  “I want you there.”

  “Since when?” I gave him a half-hearted smile, thinking about how he had always seemed so bothered by my presence in the past.

  “Since, now,” he said, pulling the sheet away from my naked body as he brought his mouth to my collar bone. He kissed his way across my clavicle from right to left, melting all my fears away. I weaved my fingers into his hair, closing my eyes. If he kept doing this, there was no way I was letting him leave for work.

  “Don’t start something you can’t finish,” I warned him.

  “Trust me, princess….I can finish,” he growled playfully.

  I laughed. As he moved down my body, my laughter was replaced with heavy breathing. My thoughts were replaced with dreams. My body was revived with a new appreciation for the mechanics of his tongue.

  He finished. I finished. We both definitely finished. A few times.

  “Been doing some horseback riding?” Lexie goaded as I slowly and uncomfortably walked into the kitchen sated and sore after Liam’s departure for work, “or should I say bareback riding?”

  I had definitely done some riding, and Liam was definitely hung like a horse, but I didn’t comment on that. Instead, I just gave her my eat shit and die look. She snickered behind her coffee mug.

  “From the heavy panting and moaning I heard over the last twelve hours, and the fact I saw Liam’s backside disappearing out the front door this morning…. I’m going to take a wild guess that things went as planned last night.”

  “You’re a real Sherlock Holmes, Lex. If this coffee gig doesn’t work out for you, you have options,” I gave her a sarcastic smirk.

  “Ouch.” She feigned hurt as she grabbed at her heart. “I would’ve expected you to be in a better mood this morning.”

  “I am. I just need coffee. And food. And something for the pain between my legs.” I grabbed a coffee mug and granola bar before gently taking a seat next to her at the bar.

  “What’s your plans today?”

  “Probably start the search for a new agent. What about you?”

  “I have the day off and so does Jake. We’re going to hang at his place.”

  “I guess things are going better for the two of you?”

  A sheepish smile crept on her face as she shrugged. “He is definitely trying harder.”

  “Good. I just hope it isn’t short lived.”

  She rolled her eyes, letting out an exasperated sigh. “Don’t worry about me, Val. I can take care of myself.”

  “Doesn’t mean you should have to. And you’re my friend. It’s my duty to worry about you. The same way you do about me.” I gave her a no-arguments-allowed look.

  “Thanks. But I really think this time is different.”

  “I’m going to take your word for it. But if you need me to kick his butt, just let me know…. And by kick his butt, I mean have my brother’s henchmen take care of him,” I grinned slyly.

  She snort laughed. Both of us knew I was only half-way joking. Jake could be a committed and doting boyfriend when he wanted to be, but it was always a phase. A phase that ended with Lexie secretively crying herself to sleep after he decided she was too much of an inconvenience for him.

  “Do you want to hang out tonight?” She changed the subject from her and Jake.

  “Actually….Liam asked me to come watch them practice,” I tried for nonchalance, not looking at her eyes that I knew would be probing.

  “Interesting….”

  “What?” I looked over at her.

  “Nothing.” She shook her head, staring down at her food.

  “No, not nothing. You can’t just say that and not tell me what’s so interesting.”

  “I’m just a little surprised. I didn’t expect you two to be seeing each other again, so soon. That’s all.”

  “Why is that?” I asked defensively.

  “Oh come on, Val. We both know he is the quintessential hit it and quit it guy.” I looked down at my granola bar and coffee, suddenly not feeling so hungry. “I’m sorry. This is all coming out completely wrong… I’m saying it’s interesting, because he’s obviously into you. It’s a good thing.” She gave me a wry smile as she nudged my shoulder.

  “Well, I wouldn’t be so sure about that. I basically had to guilt him into staying overnight and inviting me to come watch him practice.”

  “Give yourself and him some credit, Val. He doesn’t come across as the type of guy that can easily be guilted into anything if there weren’t some feelings there. Besides, I doubt it was guilt making him want to spend more time with you. You’re a total package.”

  “I am, aren’t I,” I agreed, grinning and winking at her.

  “I need to remind myself not to stroke your ego too much. It’s really starting to go to your head,” she laughed.

  The rest of the day I focused on finding a new agent. It became an increasingly challenging task as the day slowly dragged on. Thoughts of my night with Liam kept possessing my mind, making me anxious for the hours to pass, so I could see him again. And a small inkling of what Lexie had said about Liam was floating around too, only adding to my anxiousness.

  I
hadn’t heard from him since he left that morning. I knew he was working and likely busy, but I was driving myself mad waiting for some sort of communication from him. He had promised to send me the address to his uncle’s place - apparently, that was where they had always practiced since becoming a band - but as the hours passed with no word from him, I started to wonder if maybe I had unexpectedly become one of his one night stands.

  I glanced at my phone for the umpteenth time to make sure it was still on and fully charged. I doubled and then tripled checked I didn’t have it on silent, turned it to the highest volume - just in case - and then set it back down on my desk. I strummed my fingers on the desk as I tried to refocus my attention on finding an agent. I submitted my headshots and material to a few more potential agents before giving up for the day.

  It was barely after two in the afternoon. I crawled into my bed and picked up a book I had been reading, hoping it could distract me from my thoughts. My eyes felt heavy as I began to read. I fought the urge to sleep but lost the battle.

  My phone chimed loudly, startling me awake. I hastily twisted at my waist, reaching my arm behind me to hunt out my phone. I lost my balance, rolling straight off the edge of the bed and landing on the floor with a thump. I groaned, crawling to my knees to get up off the floor while removing the sheets that were twisted around my legs.

  I picked up my phone off my desk just as it dinged a second time. Both texts were from Liam. The first was simply an address, but the second had me grinning from ear to ear.

  L: Two cold showers and I still can’t get you out of my mind.

  V: Work going well, then? ;)

  L: Work sucks. All I can think about is tasting you again…and again…

  I blushed as the heat rose throughout my body. A simple text from Liam had me ready for him.

  V: I’m glad your day has been as productive as mine.

  L: You dreaming about me, princess?