by Drew Sera
When I hung up, my first thought was Sydney. Next Tuesday was Sydney’s appointment with Chris and I wouldn’t be here for that. I had told Cheng’s second in command guy that my team and I needed to be back in the U.S. Wednesday. Thanksgiving was next week and it was important for my employees to be with their families. I was promised that it wasn’t going to be a problem.
Normally, I would have taken Anthony as part of my team, but I needed him here with Sydney especially with Tuesday coming up. I got up and headed to Anthony’s office to talk with him. He was on the phone and leaning back in his seat when I arrived.
I sat across from his desk and looked around aimlessly while he finished on the phone until my eyes found a familiar black glossy card. I picked it up and read it. It was the card Sydney wrote for Anthony when she gave him the cologne. I smiled and set it back down and looked up at him. He was looking at me and flipped me off, causing me to laugh out loud. He looked run down already and it wasn’t even noon. His tie was loose, top buttons undone and sleeves were rolled up. Once he got off the phone I told him about Cheng.
“Seriously? Fuck, Col. That’s awesome.”
We talked about the team of people I’d take. He knew he was staying put and I also needed Mitch to stay put. With Sydney’s appointment Tuesday, I knew Anthony wouldn’t be in the office Tuesday and possibly Wednesday.
“Are you sure you’re okay with taking Sydney on Tuesday?”
“Positive. It’ll be fine. I’ll go with her and will take care of her and fill you in.”
“I know you will, Anth. I never worry about her when I know she’s with you.”
Anthony and I went to lunch and left the office at 2:00 for our Friday golf game. Matt pushed Anthony some but not too much.
“I’m assuming you guys are going to watch Evan and Sydney scene,” Matt said while Anthony teed off.
“Get down you fucking ball!” Anthony called after the ball he just beat the life out of.
Matt looked over at me. Anthony was hitting the ball as hard as he ever has. I knew he was distracted about tonight and I think this might have been his way of attempting to deal with it.
“Is he going to make it through the night?” Matt asked me in a low tone. We changed subjects and talked about the trip to Macau.
“You’ll be back in time for Thanksgiving, right?” Matt asked.
Ever since Anthony became friends with Matt and I, we’ve always gone to the Las Vegas Strip for Thanksgiving. But once Matt and Gina got together, they have it at their place and his family comes out from California. From age nine, I’ve known his family as mine. I was excited to see them and I was more excited for Sydney to be in a welcoming atmosphere for Thanksgiving.
“I’ll be back Wednesday night and am looking forward to it.” I teed off a pretty good shot and went back to Matt. “About Sydney…”
Matt held his hands up. “Don’t worry. I’ll talk to my folks and fill them in a little bit so that way none of them accidentally stick their foot in their mouth.”
During dinner, Sydney was chatty with Gina. It was good to see both girls get along so well. Anthony kept his hand on the back of Sydney’s chair while we waited for our food. He was going to be stubborn about this. His face showed signs of stress and I could tell this evening was going to be rough on both of us. I was really starting to worry about him though. He kept rubbing on his chest and looked ill. Matt and I are used to seeing Anthony calm and collected.
We got to Irons around 8:30 p.m. and headed over to our usual spot to start our evening. I stopped and talked with Blake as the four of them went over to the sitting area.
“How is our newest sub doing, Colin? Ready for tonight?”
“Yes, I think so. I hope it goes well and is a good experience for her.”
“How’s Anthony?” Blake asked in a quiet, gentle voice.
“Kind of a mess, to be honest.”
Blake and I watched the four of them talking. Sydney’s knee started to bounce and even though Anthony wasn’t looking at her, he still was aware. He reached over and put his hand on her knee and it calmed her. I wished he’d say something.
“His parents messed him up in that unconditional love department. He knows if he’s not involved, he won’t get hurt. I agree with you and Matt. I see their connection and worry Anthony’s going to let something slip by him.”
Evan walked over and greeted us.
“How’s she doing?” Evan asked me.
“Fine. Little anxious and nervous, but she wants this. In the other club she previously played in, she never got to experience any of the good stuff.” I paused while I was watching Anthony laughing along with Sydney. I drug my attention back to Evan and Blake. “Evan, she’s never had aftercare in a club after a scene. The asshole she played with, never did that for her.” Evan knew what I was saying, without saying it.
“Don’t worry, Colin. I will take good care of her. Afterwards I’ll take her towards the side so you and Anthony can be close in case she needs you guys. This sort of play in this environment will be new to her from what it sounds like.”
I nodded and was thankful that he was at least thinking clearly and of her. The three of us were watching Anthony and Sydney together. Blake joked and asked if Anthony was going to be able to let go of Sydney. I had a strong feeling that tonight was going to be rough on Anthony. And me.
Evan said he’d be over in a bit and headed towards a sitting area where Will was getting blown by an unattached submissive. I sat down by Sydney and joined the golf conversation that was going on. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Paul looking over at Sydney. I swear, he better not fuck this night up. Paul continued to watch and the next thing I knew, Evan came over. He made polite conversation with everyone for a few minutes and then faced Sydney.
“Evening, little sub. I’m going to be over there by that set of black leather chairs. Whenever you’re ready, I’ll meet you there.”
With that, Evan headed over to the location where their scene was about to occur. Her eyes showed a mixture of nervousness and excitement while Anthony looked like a baseball bat had struck him. I focused on Sydney now.
“Baby, are you ready?” She looked over to where Evan was seated and then she looked up at Anthony. She opened her mouth to say something but then closed it and turned to face me.
“Yes, Sir.”
Gina gave her a quick hug and told her to have fun. I took her hand and she and I walked over towards Evan. Goddamn Anthony.
“Are you sure? Remember, he won’t do anything that you guys haven’t negotiated. Okay? I will be near.”
“Yes, Sir.”
I looked back at Anthony and he looked pale, distant and like he was holding his breath.
“Sir, did you read my journal?”
Why was she bringing this up now? I had read her assignment book just this morning. I had asked her the prior morning to write about one of her recent nightmares. I thought back to it though trying to think if there was something she was trying to tell me.
“I read your response to my assignment. Was there something else?”
“No, Sir.” I thought I detected some disappointment in her voice. But maybe it was nerves.
“Remember baby, ‘yellow’ and ‘red’ will work with Evan. Don’t be afraid to use them.” We stopped by a deep purple sofa and I leaned on the back of it facing the area where Evan was. This is as far as I was going and I’d keep watch from here. I kissed her cheek and told her I’d be right here. “Have a good time, Sydney. Relax and enjoy it, baby.”
With that, she turned and walked towards Evan. I turned to look over my shoulder at Anthony and saw he was making his way over. If he weren’t attached to her, he’d already have been here and would have walked Sydney over with me. I knew this was causing him heartache.
Matt and Gina were headed towards another sitting section close by so they could watch and Paul came over and leaned on the back of the couch before Anthony got over here.
“Where’s t
he sign up sheet, Everett?”
“There isn’t one, Paul. Now, if you’ll excuse me.”
I turned my attention back towards Sydney and Paul huffed away when he realized I had no intention of our conversation continuing. He went off towards the side where Matt was. Fucking great. I knew he was going to watch. He was going to watch her every move and it made me uncomfortable. I didn’t want Paul seeing any part of Sydney’s body.
Anthony came over and sat on the back of the couch that I was leaning on. When Evan stood to meet Sydney I began holding my breath.
Chapter 3
Friday, November 22nd
Sydney
My feet took me closer to Evan. I couldn’t believe this was actually happening. A club like Irons with good experienced Doms. Evan seemed nice and even though I wished it were Anthony or Colin, I knew I had no room to be picky.
It’s been so much fun playing with Colin and Anthony, but I knew that was short term. Colin trains subs or couples and Anthony told me himself he didn’t have time for one. So I need to stop thinking I had a chance with either of them.
I had been disappointed that Colin and Anthony hadn’t noticed my notebook over the past few days. I had been strategically leaving it around the house in hopes one of them would get curious and read what I had written. I couldn’t be angry with them though. It was my personal journal and not the assignment one Colin gave me writing assignments in. They both stayed away from my personal journal and promised me they’d never read it but said they felt it was important for me to have an outlet. They said I could write anything I felt in there and they’d respect my privacy. I guess I was surprised that they meant it. I thought maybe one of them would see it and pick it up to read, but neither had. They respected that. I was just too scared to tell them that I wanted my scene to be with them in Irons. I wrote it in my journal and really was angry with myself for not being able to be brave enough to voice it. Each time I tried, I’d choked on the words.
I couldn’t dwell on that now because I was standing in front of Evan. Evan looked very serious and his appearance backed that up. He had on a black tee shirt, dark jeans and he looked lethal. He reached out and took my hand to pull me over to the chair he was sitting on. I felt like I was floating and like this wasn’t real. Only it was. He stood and took his shirt off forcing me to come face to face with two pierced nipples and a tanned, muscular chest with dark chest hair. From what I remember, Evan was older than Anthony but younger than Colin and he looked perfectly fine and was magazine quality handsome, but he wasn’t Anthony or Colin. The two of them cause my heart to race.
Anthony.
Anthony was a different kind of handsome to me. Evan could have been a model and even Colin. Colin was very good looking. But Anthony was a little different. Anthony was about as tall as Evan was. He didn’t have the washboard abs like Evan but he had big muscular arms and a broad chest. His stomach was flat but he was also soft and very easy to snuggle up to. I loved being in Anthony’s arms especially at night. He knew how to hold me tight, without making me feel trapped. There were so many things about Anthony that I was attracted to. I was in love with the way he made me feel and the way he looked out for me. I love how he winks at me and makes me laugh. I wanted him to be interested in me. But I wasn’t in his league.
I wasn’t in Evan’s league either.
Or Colin’s.
Evan was seated now and gripped my hands in his. He had a wicked gleam in eyes and I felt inadequate all of a sudden. I couldn’t screw this up. This was my only chance to prove that I’m capable of being good, and that Colin’s and Anthony’s work wasn’t wasted. If I mess this up, it’ll be all over Irons before I even leave tonight. No Dom would want to come near me. The worst part would be that I would have disappointed Anthony and Colin.
Evan stood and came closer to me and stared at me. I felt awkward and like a joke. I didn’t belong here.
“What’s your safe word, little sub?”
Focus Sydney! I screamed at myself.
“Um, red, Sir.”
“Use it if you’re uncomfortable.”
He put his hands on my shoulders and it startled me. I was okay. His hands didn’t feel gentle or like they could protect me like Anthony’s. Or Colin’s. Evan’s hands were really firm and strong. He bent and whispered something that I didn’t quite understand at the time.
“If you don’t say your safe word when you need it, Graves will beat the shit out of me. Don’t be afraid, little sub. Remember, our safe word is ‘red.’ You’re in good hands. Graves wouldn’t let me near you if he thought otherwise.”
Graves? My mind was moving in slow motion and I just stared at him. I tried focusing on what he had said. Graves. Graves. A light bulb went on. Anthony. Evan calls Anthony by his last name most of the time. My thoughts drifted off to Anthony again. I wonder what Anthony’s middle name was. I wonder if he came from a big family.
Evan sat down while my mind raced and he continued to stare at me. I stood awkwardly waiting for directions or for something to happen. My mind wasn’t working. I looked down at Evan and he was just staring at me. I should be doing something but didn’t know what. Evan’s stare was hard and like stone. I looked down and then over to Colin and saw that Anthony was there.
Anthony was there too! I was okay. Anthony and Colin were there.
Ahhh! I was playing with my hands.
Evan said something and I caught the tail end of it.
“Undress, little sub,” he repeated for me.
Undress? Yes, I think I knew what that meant. Everything was moving in slow motion for me. Undress. He was going to think I wasn’t very bright. I began unbuttoning my top. Why the hell did I pick a button tank top instead of just a pullover tank top? This could be the death of me. I felt warm and embarrassed. I was messing up and my fingers were shaking. I looked around the club and everything seemed fuzzy to me. I felt like everyone was staring at me. I know they probably weren’t, but that’s what I felt like. I saw Colin and Anthony again and felt safer. They were close.
Anthony was close.
“Quickly, little sub.”
Yes, I definitely was messing up. That was a second request. Or was it the third? He had to tell me more than once! Telling me more than once was telling me that I was too slow. I wasn’t good enough. All the work Colin did with me and all the time he spent didn’t matter. I was bad and not trainable. Everything was getting blurry again and I realized my eyes were filling up with tears. I’m pathetic and don’t belong here.
Evan stood up quickly and out of instinct I backed away. He was going to punish me. As I was back peddling, I tripped over the end of a rug and fell. I was hopeless. This is it. I messed up!
Sydney you’re so stupid! I screamed at myself. This is why I deserve someone like Howard. My eyes were watery and I was trying to keep the tears at bay. I was so angry and disappointed. It was so stupid of me to think that I’d ever deserve anyone better than Howard. I’m sure Colin and Anthony were disgusted in me.
Evan was coming near me more quickly now and I turned my head and held my hand out so he wouldn’t hit my head. Anything but the head and my ears. Howard liked to hit my ears while he called me names.
“Please, not my head, Sir. I’m sorry.”
“Little sub, don’t be afraid.” Evan was crouching on the floor in front of me. He was so close that I could feel the heat of his presence.
He wasn’t hitting me.
Why wasn’t he hitting me? I was bad and slow. I didn’t understand what was happening or why he wasn’t hitting me.
“Little sub, I think you need your Dom.”
What? My Dom? He must have me confused with someone else. Someone good enough to have a Dom. I kept waiting to hear a belt being undone so he could lay the law down and punish me, so I kept my eyes closed. All that was running through my head was how disappointed and embarrassed Colin must be with me. I was bracing myself. I was ready for the belt. I deserved it.
Suddenly I s
melled Anthony’s cologne right before I felt the most wonderful hands wrap around my arms.
Chapter 4
Friday, November 22nd
Anthony
I feel like I might be coming down with the flu or something. I was feverish and ached all over. I felt like I had horrible heartburn and looked up from where I was sitting just in time to see my sunshine walk towards Evan. I had to get over there and support her and push my feelings aside.
I sat on the back of the couch next to Colin and kept my mouth tightly shut. I held my breath while Evan put his hands on her arms as he leaned closer to tell her something I couldn’t hear. I wanted to yell at him to get the fuck away from her ears. Those were mine. I suck on those. Mine.
I thought of that deep dark bruise she has on her upper arm where Evan was touching. He didn’t know her body like Colin and I did. My stomach hurt when he took her hand and led her to the chair. My hand.
Soon he’d have her head buried in his lap and I don’t know if I could stand watching that. He told her to undress and she began fumbling. This was stupid for us to have allowed this on the main floor. We should have insisted a private room where she couldn’t be distracted or potentially triggered by sounds of other scenes. This was too much.
Nerves were getting the best of my sunshine and she tripped and fell. I jumped off the back of the couch and met Evan’s eyes. Why the fuck was he looking at me and not her? She should be his focus, not me! She held her hand outward as if she was anticipating him to hit her.
“Anth, you have to help Evan,” Colin said quietly to me.
Seeing Sydney preparing herself to be hit by Evan broke my heart. She was sheltering her head and had her eyes closed facing the other way. I kept my head about me and approached the scene respectfully and slowly. Evan was crouched by Sydney but wasn’t touching her. I stopped at a respectable distance. Evan looked up and motioned me over.