Chapter Thirteen
Outside, it felt cold as the scented autumn winds whistled past the two of us. We walked slowly in silence. I had insisted on using my cane so that I wouldn’t have to lean on his arm. Four years had flown past since that night when I jumped through the window to meet him in secret. I had been madly in love with him since then, but now I was older, wiser, and guarded. The one thing that kept haunting me as we strode along was Fantasia. He hadn’t mentioned anything about her yet, or was it that he suspected I had eloped with one of our kinsfolk. I was certain he still didn’t know she was his child.
‘How is your father?’ He asked abruptly.
‘He is sad. I don’t know what else to say. He is very remorseful Adam. I still can’t believe he could have done something as awful as that. He swears he didn’t mean to kill your father and that he only meant to scare him away but, they both fought over the gun and it went off.’
‘I know.’ He answered in reply.
‘What do you mean you know?' I asked angrily, 'My father ruined my life, our lives. The one thing he managed to succeed at, was keeping us apart. Only today, mother was telling me he asks for my pardon but I think it’s rather too late now.’
‘Leila, what I meant when I said I know was, now I understand why those two acted the way they did. Before I joined the army, I never possibly could imagine what war does to a man. War can drive you insane in more ways than one. When you kill a man the first time, that image is engraved in your memory for the rest of your life. It haunts you and torments you constantly.'
I still did understand how these two incidents were related but I remained silent so he may speak.
'I happened to dig up mine and your father’s military records,' he said, 'and I found out both men had served in the same platoon in world war two in Naples, Italy. On returning home, my father brought with him a young Italian girl who he later married, she was my mother. Details thereafter are scanty but apparently, my father shot and killed my mother when he found out she was having a liaison with your father which explains the deep hatred the two had for each other. Leila, having learnt the bitter truth about my parents, I do not blame your father for what happened. Two wrongs don’t make a right but my father was no angel either and I have learned to live with that. So must you.’
‘I’m so sorry Adam.’
‘I understand Leila. What matters to me more than anything is that I should not in any way live in the shadow of my father or act the way he did for my sake and yours.’
I stopped and faced him.
‘What do you mean for my sake and yours?’
‘I love you Leila, if it means I must suffer for the rest of my life to win your heart I will.’ He said. He had stopped too, but I started walking again. My mind wanted to explode. I was being accosted by all kinds of emotions. I tried to remain calm. ‘Breathe,’ I told myself, ‘breathe.’
‘I know you blame me for leaving you to join the army but it was the only choice I had at the time.’
He stopped again.
‘Adam, I know it was thoughtless of me to condemn you when you left me, but why must you suffer because of me?’
‘Precisely’ He replied
He remained stagnate.
‘Do you even feel anything for me? I asked I too had stopped now. It was the pounding of my heart that had stopped me this time.
‘Leila I intend to marry you, my life is yours I am in paradise with you and I wish for nothing to come between us. Say something Leila darling, please say something to me.’
‘But,’ I began, my heart beating even harder now. ‘Adam, I must go.’
'Why?'
‘I don’t know.’
What do you mean you don’t know?’ he asked, his voice was trembling and stuttering.
‘I said, I don’t know.’
‘Okay, at least you could have said no. Rejection in any form hurts, but at least a flat rejection will bring me closure. Why do you make it so hard for me to love you, why Leila?
‘I must go.’ I said, not sure what to say or do. My emotions were revolting against me.
‘I truly love you wholly Leila. With all my heart and my feeble soul, I love you. You are my life, without you, I’m nothing and my life is incomplete. The first time I saw your beautiful face, from that moment on, you took my breath away.Let our love be an unending journey.I stayed alive in the war because I had to see your smile once more. I don’t recall a day or a time that I haven’t thought of you, because every single day that went by, you never left my mind.’ His words tore through my heart like a burning flame. All strength within me was dissipated that very instant and tears came flooding down my cheeks.
‘Why then did you hurt me in a way I never hurt you?' I shouted, ‘You knew I couldn’t live without you. Didn’t you? Answer me? I found myself pushing against his chest. 'I loved you so much Adam but had to keep it a secret. It is a secret I have been hiding for so long. When you left me, I told myself I wouldn’t miss you, but I remembered what it felt like to be beside you. The greatest pain was when I had to smile just to keep the tears from falling. The emptiness inside me kept growing each passing day that I thought I could die. And Fantasia, she alone has kept me alive, she alone gave me hope. But what if you had died Adam, perished in that war of yours, what was I going to tell her? Answer me, what would I have told her?’
‘I don’t understand what you saying?’
‘She is your daughter Adam! Remember that night at Ann Arbor? She is that night.’
‘I….I have a child? I’m a father!’ He sounded confused, ‘Why didn’t you tell me Leila, I wouldn’t have gone to war? I never should have gone.’ that last statement it seemed he was muttering to himself.
‘I tried Adam, at the funeral remember, I tried to speak to you.’
‘How old is she?’ He asked.
‘She will be making four this winter.’
‘Did she ever ask about me?’
‘Not until today. Some kid at her school said she had no father, so she asked me what a father is.’
I felt his warm thick hands wipe tears from my cheeks.
‘I am truly sorry Leila, please forgive me.’
Was he crying? I could smell his skin close to my nostrils.
‘Yet you still remained here waiting for me.’ He said, his voice had broken,
‘Adam, yes I did wait for you, with all the little strength I had left inside of me, I waited for you and you came back. Once I fell in love with you, love made it hard for me to leave you.’ I said.
Give your hand,’ he said.
Reader, I obliged.
‘Falling in love with you Leila,' He said, 'was beyond my control. I made a promise to my heart that I’ll only seek your love and even if time were to cease to exist, and love ran away from me, there would still be no reason not to love you. My name will be your name, and I want you to know this, that I've loved no other with all my heart and my soul as I have loved you Leila.’
Then he kissed me, I cried. And when he said ‘please marry me’, I cried again because my heart couldn’t bear being apart from him any longer.
‘You deserve the whole of me Leila. You deserve far much more than me.’
‘But I cannot love you any better Adam, I can’t be like other women who can see, am unable to cook your dinner or iron your clothes.’
‘You don’t need to, just love me the best you can.’
Epilogue
Adam and I were married in the summer and what a beautiful day it was for us all, but most of all for little Fantasia who was my flower girl, my sisters Abby and Amy, my bride’s maids. Adam brought along his best friend and wingman stick to act as his best man. Miss Rivers brought almost the entire school to my wedding. Papa had given us his blessing when Adam, Fantasia and I paid him a visit three weeks before our wedding day.
Reverend Smith indulged us in one of his special quotes from the Song of Solomon inside the rose and lily scented church.
As an apple
tree among the trees of the forest,
So is my beloved among the young men.
With great delight I sat in his shadow,
And his fruit was sweet to my taste.
He brought me to the banqueting house and his banner over me was love.
Sustain me with raisins; refresh me with apples, for I am sick with love.
We rode to our new home in filer creek on Adam’s loud Harley- Davidson amidst shouts and cheers from all gathered to witness my dramatic change of fortune.
My husband went on to complete his law degree and bar exams. He opened up the Adam and Clive Law advocates at the Kalkaska county Headquarters a few miles from home. His first case was to appeal papa’s conviction and managed to convince the Judge to reduce papa’s sentence to manslaughter. Papa will be out in a year’s time.
We have been married seven years now and have welcomed three additions to our fledging family. Daisy, Grace, and last but not least, Adam William Holloway the Fourth.
My family is forever indebted to Adam and I am blessed to love and be loved not by just any man dearest friend, but by Adam. Dearest reader friend, in the arms of Adam William Holloway the third, I have found true happiness. He is everything and a little more.
On my part, I have very simple plans. All I wish for, is to grow old and die by his side knowing very well that Adam has given me a simple gift, one far better than sight, a gift of true love.
#
I wish to take this opportunity to thank you once again for reading my book. If you enjoyed it, kindly leave me a review. Don’t ignore and move on and do encourage your family and friends to read it too.
I thank you in advance
Very warm and Kind regards,
Walibba .J. Philip
About me:
I love to read and write about many things. It's my passion. I love to paint too, abstract art, it’s my other love. I love to listen, to what others have to say. It puts life into perspective. I love life; it's the greatest gift of all. What about you, what do you say about yourself? Do let me know.
Other published Titles:
Recluse: The Induction
Boundless
Recluse: The Ramona Question
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