Like her life, her passion, was a trivial thing that could be altered on a whim. “Jewelry or something?”
He gave her a small smile. “Whatever you want.”
She threw back the blankets and climbed out of bed. Geez. She was starving. She braced a hand on the nightstand when her head swam. Landon reached for her and she stayed him with an outstretched palm. “I’m fine.”
He probably wanted to fix her. He liked to fix things. Clearly. Since he’d tried to fix her entire life around his.
“I can’t believe you did all this without talking to me,” she said, lowering her arm.
“I didn’t do anything.” His tone ratcheted up to peeved.
“You did plenty.” She slipped her dress over her head, a simple sheath that coasted down to her toes, and shuffled into her sandals. “This is my life. My call.” She unplugged her cell phone from the charger and shoved it into her purse.
“That may be true, but the life you have growing inside of you,” he said, “is ours.”
Indignant, she spun on him. Had their child become a bargaining chip already? “You did not just say that.”
Rather than answer… or apologize… he pushed out of bed and stalked naked to the bathroom. “I’m going to get a shower.” He shut the door behind him.
Well. She could walk out, too. Leave. For good, she told herself.
Or until Landon quit acting like a horse’s ass.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Landon drummed his fingers against a yellow pad on his desk as he stared down his office phone. Kimber had vanished by the time he’d climbed out of the shower. But he’d purposely stayed in the bathroom long enough to give her the opportunity to leave.
What he didn’t get was why his suggestions had upset her so much. What expecting woman wouldn’t want the father of her child thinking of her well-being first and foremost? What woman didn’t want to be taken care of?
She had a monkey on her back, two if he counted Mick, he thought with a juvenile curl of his lip. Landon’s offer to move her and her business to a nicer part of town, buy out her moronic ex, and further financially support her would reduce her worries by half. Probably more. Couldn’t she see that?
Frustrated, he had the irrational desire to talk to someone.
Not about Kimber and the stupid fight they’d had. Arguments happened. He understood that. He planned on tracking her down after work. After she calmed down… after he calmed down. But he wanted to talk to someone about the whole situation first. Just to run it by another set of ears and make sure he wasn’t overlooking some major component.
Outside his office windows, his employees gathered in front of the boardroom across the hall. He wasn’t close with anyone at work, but if he was, he couldn’t imagine pulling someone into his office and spilling his guts. Keeping them at arm’s length had been a strategy when he started his business. In case he had to let someone go, demote or choose someone for a promotion. He couldn’t afford to play favorites. It benefited his business to remain impartial. The unfortunate side effect of that rationale was that he’d created an island and marooned himself on it.
Steepling his hands, he debated calling Evan. But Landon wasn’t sure if Kimber had told Gloria about the pregnancy yet. If he told his brother and Evan told Gloria… well, Landon didn’t need another reason for Kimber to be pissed at him. Breaking the news to her best friend would do just that. There was always his sister, Angel, but again, her connection with Kimber was reason enough not to call her. His cousin Shane was an automatic out. August sucked at this relationship stuff—or used to, anyway, before he’d gotten married. And there was the probability August would want to talk business and Landon didn’t want to get sidetracked.
That left Aiden.
Landon’s blissfully happy, walking-on-sunshine, recently married younger brother picked up on the third ring. “Yeah.”
“It’s Landon.”
“I know.”
“You have a minute?”
“I have many minutes. Sadie’s shoe shopping and I’m holding up a pillar in the center of Osborn Mall.”
“You’re not at work?”
“You do know it’s rounding eight o’clock, right?”
Was it? No wonder his stomach was rumbling. “Forgot.”
“You are a machine.”
The Tin Man, to be precise, he thought wryly.
“Evan said you hit it off with Angel’s friend, Kimber,” Aiden said. “That you guys were dating or something.”
Or something. “Did he?” Landon said flatly. So much for being incognito.
“Yes,” Aiden said, dragging the word out and sounding bemused. “Is that why you called me?”
“What are you talking about?”
“To get relationship advice. Not like you can call Evan or Angel since they’re only one degree removed from your new girlfriend. And Shane isn’t much of a talker when it comes to feelings.”
Mind reader. “She’s not my girlfriend.”
“Now we’re getting somewhere.” Landon could hear the smile in Aiden’s voice. “What is she?”
Just tell him. “She’s… going to be. It’s probably too soon to make plans but, ah… Kimber is…”
“Is…?” Aiden prompted. “Come on, man. What is she?”
“She’s pregnant.” He blew the words out on a dizzying breath. “And I am not sure what to do next,” he admitted with a wince.
A string of swear words floated through the phone… followed by a predictable whoop of laughter. “Congratulations, man! That’s… that’s effing awesome is what it is! I get another niece or nephew? Sweet! Man, I hate that you beat Sadie and me out of the gate, but I am so happy for you guys!”
Landon found himself smiling at his keyboard, trying on Aiden’s reaction for size. It was pretty exciting. He had a lot of reasons to be happy when he thought about it. A baby was something to celebrate. A baby with a woman he liked a whole heck of a lot. A woman his family knew and approved of.
“Thanks, man,” Landon said, adding, “We’re really excited.”
He didn’t know if “excited” was the right word to describe Kimber, but they’d both been in a state of shock since they found out. They’d still been trying to figure out how to deal with the whole thing this morning. How to deal with one another.
It took him a moment to digest that last thought. He and Kimber were in a relationship. A real one. One where they wouldn’t see eye to eye on everything. A period of adjustment and some arguing could be expected. What they had was disturbingly… normal.
After fervently avoiding this kind of connection with another person for over a decade and a half, Landon had stumbled into a girlfriend… a family… by mistake.
“So, what do you need to know?” Aiden asked. “If we’ll babysit? Because we totally will. I don’t know how the commute will work, but if you two ever need a weekend alone, we’re all over the kid. Man! A baby! Do you want a daughter or a son?”
Landon nearly blacked out at the question, then realized it was because he hadn’t taken a breath in several long seconds. “Either,” he managed, his throat tight, tears barely barricaded behind his eyelids. He’d underestimated how much the news of a child would mean to his family. He thought of the stroller, all the bags of baby things. To Kimber’s mother. To everyone. This wasn’t a project he could craft a to-do list around; this was a baby, a life that would make his father a grandfather for the second time, would make his brothers uncles again, and his sister Angel… God. Angel. What would he tell her? After her issues with fertility, how could he call and tell her he and Kimber had made an Oops Baby?
“Sadie’s waving at me. Holy crap, how many pairs did she buy?” Aiden muttered.
“Listen, I’m not sure how to tell everyone yet, so keep this to yourself, okay, Aid?”
“Yeah. I mean, I’ll tell Sadie, but she’s Fort Knox.”
“What am I Fort Knox about?” he heard Sadie ask.
“I’ll let you go. Thanks,�
�� Landon said in a hurry. He hung up the phone, more confused than he was before. He’d called Aiden because he’d needed someone to talk to, and instead had reached a conclusion he hadn’t expected.
This whole thing with Kimber wasn’t nearly as casual and easy to organize as he’d thought. He was navigating through relationship territory and that was dicey. He had no idea what he was doing.
He swept his eyes down the legal pad under his hand. Everything a baby needed in a tidy, neat list. Crib, blankets, onesies, pacifier, diapers, rocking chair, and about a hundred other things he’d found online. He’d checked off each item after he purchased it. The page was full of checkmarks from top to bottom and would have run his American Express card up to the limit if it had one.
He’d gone on an Internet shopping spree in a blaze of jealousy over Mick and Kimber’s mother… and to prove to Kimber that she needed him. Because, quite frankly, he was afraid that she didn’t.
In his hustling to make himself look important, he’d neglected to consider what Kimber needed. What their child might really need. He’d handled this situation the way he handled everything else. Going through the motions. Arranging. Because that’s what he did.
No wonder she’s pissed.
What he should’ve done was let her know how he felt. All he had to do was figure out what he was thinking first.
No, you don’t.
No. He didn’t. He knew. He may not have relationship experience, but he’d had enough non-relationship experience to recognize what he and Kimber had was different from anything in his past. He hadn’t had this with anyone—not even Rachel, and that had been the deepest relationship he’d had.
Until Kimber. She’d raised the bar so high, it was in orbit.
He chucked the list into the trash. He’d tell her tonight. Make her understand how he felt… how much she meant to him. How much he…
A lump formed in his throat.
How much I love her.
* * *
“Well?” Gloria asked when Kimber exited the doctor’s office.
Kimber looped her arm in her friend’s as they walked to the door. “It’s official. I’m pregnant.” As if there’d been any doubt. Her rogue craving for olives and bone-draining fatigue was proof enough. She cast a glance around the waiting room. Several women eyed them with interest. “And I’m pretty sure everyone here thinks we’re a couple,” she mumbled to Glo.
They left the doctor’s office and headed to the mall to eat junk food and buy things they didn’t need. She filled Glo in on her mother’s concerns, on Mick and Landon’s pissing contest, on Landon’s corporate takeover of her life.
Glo handed over one of two Häagan-Dazs bars she’d just purchased at a stall in the food court and directed her to a small table with two chairs.
“Mmm. Nothing could be better than this,” Kimber said, chocolate melting on her tongue. Sun streamed in through the glass ceiling overhead, and water splashed onto tall, tropical plants arranged around the decorative fountain next to them.
“Want to know what I think?”
She wasn’t sure she did want to know what Glo thought. Actually, she was pretty sure she already knew what Glo thought. “About the ice cream?” she hedged.
Gloria slow-blinked.
“I’m kidding. Of course I want to know what you think.”
“I love you. I just want you to know the truth. The way I see it, anyway. You are capable of making decisions without my jaded input, you know.”
Kimber smiled wholeheartedly. “I respect your opinion, Glo. No need to warn me. Come on, I count on you for zero sugar coating.” Especially now when she didn’t want to hear the one thing she needed to hear most.
Glo lowered her ice cream bar and met Kimber’s eyes. “You and Landon are going to have a hard enough time raising a child together.”
Kimber quirked her lips. Tell her something she didn’t know.
“You’re from two different worlds,” Glo continued. “He can’t expect you to live in his worry-free world any more than you can expect him to be happy amongst boxes of frayed clothing and retro furniture.”
Hmm. Her rust-colored couch would look odd in his elegant space. And what about her clutter of papers and bills for Hobo Chic? His office was pristine, everything in neat stacks and labeled… or at least it had been until he’d cleared the desk and threw her on top of it, she thought with a satisfied smirk. A smirk she wiped off her face before Glo caught her daydreaming about amazing sex with the father of her unborn baby.
“Could you imagine sharing a closet with him?” Glo said, taking another bite of her ice cream.
Kimber pictured her beat-up wardrobe next to Landon’s multi-thousand-dollar suits and shoes so shiny they could signal a plane. It was kind of ridiculous. Kind of like them.
He was a streamlined, sleek, suave businessman with a million-dollar company and a zillion employees. She was lucky to hold on to the three co-workers she had and tallied her inventory on a thirty-five-dollar program she’d downloaded off the Internet. She was scrappy. He was refined. She was mac-and-cheese-from-a-box. He was Tuna Tartare.
Glo cleaned the remainder of her ice cream from the stick. “What if he wants to send junior to a private or charter school and you want public or home school? What if he doesn’t share your views on religion? Vaccinations? Politics?”
Kimber’s ice cream dripped on the napkin she’d spread on the table in front of her. She hadn’t considered any of those things. Shouldn’t she at least know his political affiliation or if he believed in God before they raised a child together?
“The best thing for both of you”—Glo pointed at her with the bare popsicle stick—“is to talk through the major issues now. Before the baby is born and your judgment is completely clouded.”
Well. That sounded reasonable.
“Work it out ahead of time.” Kimber nodded, seeing the first glimmer of hope since Glo had turned into Debbie Downer. Landon was in his element in planning mode. If they sat down to have a conversation outlining the basics of bringing up their child, he’d handle it perfectly. She stared into the splashing water of the fountain next to her table, her worries beginning to dissipate. He was pragmatic, organized, and thorough. Everything she wasn’t.
“Honey.” Glo reached across the table to grasp her hand. “There’s only one way you’ll be able to make unbiased decisions with this man.”
She pegged Glo with a look that asked And that is?
“Break it off,” Glo answered firmly.
She felt the side-to-side motion of her head shaking.
“I mean it, Kimber,” her best friend insisted, concern coloring her blue eyes. “As long as you keep having sex with him, you’ll let him talk you into anything.”
“Ha!” She pointed her melting ice cream bar at Glo before making a face and dropping the mess onto her napkin. “That’s not true,” she said, cleaning off her fingers. “He didn’t talk me into anything this morning.”
“You didn’t have sex with him last night.”
Damn. She was right. Was the sex clouding her judgment? It is and you know it.
“No más,” Glo said with a wag of her finger. “It’s the only way.”
The terrifying part was that she suspected Glo was right.
* * *
At dark, Kimber parked her clanking car in the alleyway behind Hobo Chic and took the back stairs up to her apartment. As she slid the key in the lock, a scuffling sound came from the bottom of the steps. The safety light behind the man at ground level cast his face in shadow, but she easily made out his long, lean build and spiked, stylish hair.
“Landon.” Saying his name hurt, especially considering what she had to do.
“One and only.” He climbed the long flight, and she waited, pushing the door open and gesturing for him to go in ahead of her. He swept his arms around her, she assumed to pull her close for a long, wet kiss. Since that had been recently determined as ill-advised, she palmed his chest and pushed, just a g
entle shove.
He blew out a sigh of frustration, and she walked into her apartment, rested her shopping bag on the kitchen counter, and tossed her keys beside it.
“I didn’t think that would work,” he said as he shut the door.
“What?”
He came to her. “Kissing you so you’d forget you’re mad at me.”
Wow. Gloria was a genius. Because right about now she thought a kiss could make her forget anything. Her own name, even.
“I’m not mad at you,” she said. He leaned against the counter over her, and her eyes traced the shape of his biceps beneath his sleeves, the strong line of his confident posture. She blinked and forced herself to stay on task. “I think we need to sort out where we are in this… whatever this is we have. We haven’t been very responsible about stating our positions.”
He nodded, barely. A sign for her to speak.
She didn’t know where to start… “We’re going to have a baby.” There. Start with the basics. “I’m not interested in moving in with you. Or taking your money to buy Hobo Chic from Mick,” she added. “That’s something I’m saving for on my own. Something I will do on my own.” His eyebrows pinched but he remained silent, so she said the next thing on her mind. “We can share custody. We can share parenting. And I think we should make as many major decisions as we can before we have a slobbery, pink, adorable baby distracting our focus.” Bringing up their baby tightened her chest, but she swallowed down her feelings. This was for the best.
Meanwhile, his face had fallen during her mini monologue. She didn’t know if his reaction was due to her saying she wasn’t moving in with him, or more because she’d taken control of the conversation. She liked that control. Liked creating her future instead of him creating it for her. Glo was right. This was easier without lust sullying her brain.
“As far as us…” This was the hardest part. Suggesting the one thing she didn’t want to suggest. But she had to. For their child’s sake. They couldn’t raise a kid together who didn’t know where his or her parents stood. They couldn’t just keep doing what felt good and lay waste to anyone in the path between. “We can be partners in raising our child. But as far as us…” She shook her head, the words refusing to come. “We can’t…” She closed her eyes. Say it. But she didn’t have to. Landon said it for her.
The Millionaire Affair (Love in the Balance) Page 21