by Alexa Davis
“Do you think when we’re married, you’ll stop making me cry?” I asked with my face pressed against his neck.
“Probably not.” He stroked my hair and I kept playing with the ring. “We have to get back to everyone sometime.”
“I’d say no, but you haven’t had all your brothers together for, literally, years. So, I guess I can stop being selfish.” George kissed my temple and chuckled.
“And then, there’s the fact that our entire families got together to celebrate this with us…providing you said yes, of course.” I pulled back to look him in the face.
“Oh. And if I said no?”
“I would’ve taken the ice cream to my bedroom and committed suicide by double chocolate ripple.”
“Not funny, George.”
“I trusted you wanted the same things I do. Neither of us is unsure of how we feel. Just how we were going about it. I realized that I wanted you to know, today and forever, that I am yours.” He stood and held out his hand once more.
“Well then, I guess we better go tell the folks that I finally let you catch me.”
23. George
We were met by somber faces when we returned to the family party. Cal wasn’t showing off her new sparkly, and everyone seemed to be afraid to ask. Mom wouldn’t even meet my gaze and busied herself with dishing out dessert seconds. Cal made them wait a little longer, chatting to Rachel as though nothing had happened, while my sister-in-law gaped at her.
My mother made a small sound of frustration before Cal caved. She ran to her and threw her arms around her neck, signaling the men to start hollering and stomping their feet. Even Daniel, normally so reserved and calm, let out a yodel that Skipper felt the need to reply to. Patty called out for help to clean up as Rachel, Callie, and our mothers took to a corner, presumably to talk weddings. Some of the guys drifted off to their quarters, suddenly remembering an early morning, but a few started picking up the dirty and empty dishes and heading toward the kitchen.
My dad congratulated me, and Tom clapped me on the back. He quietly asked if I’d talked to Cal about my idea to branch out and start my own company yet, and when I shook my head, he nodded and said he’d keep his mouth shut. I reminded him that we both wanted to stick around to help him with his thefts first. He shook my hand and squeezed my shoulder again, then wandered toward Daniel and Tuck and the outdoor beer fridge.
Apart from the rest, I saw Logan, quietly sitting in a corner. He watched the celebration with a look I would have sworn was rage, if I could think of a reason that warranted it. I knew it was the worst idea for me, of all people, to talk to him now, but my feet moved of their own volition and before I had an idea of what to say, I was sitting next to him on the low stone wall that wrapped around the north end of the veranda, watching the others enjoy the evening.
It was more comfortable there, outside of the lantern light, than it was surrounded by people, even the people I loved. I wondered what Logan could have gone through to make him want to be separate, but I didn’t want to ask and ruin the silence. It had been years since we’d spoken and it not be an argument. Even as I sat there, my blood heated. I was getting married. The night was supposed to be for Cal, and me. Of course, Logan would appear and screw it up.
“So, what you been up to, Logan?” I finally asked him. “You probably just had to go through all this, I know.”
“No, it’s okay. Tuck told me what was going down; I just had bad timing.” He clasped his hands in his lap, rubbing the back of one thumb with the other. “I seem to have bad timing a lot.” His voice hitched and I glanced over. He didn’t look angry anymore. He looked like so many friends of mine, after their time in the desert. He looked lost.
“Man, if you want me to leave it alone, I will. But you look like you’ve seen the wrong side of a war zone.”
“Not like you have, but yeah. Yeah, I feel like I’ve been in hell, and I’m not sure I’m out yet.” I sat silently, and waited for him to decide what he wanted to do.
“G-man, I’m not going to shit on your big night. Callie’s really, really happy. I wondered if you’d ever figure it out and put your man-pants on.” I scoffed.
“I’m a little surprised you didn’t bring a lady-friend with you. You never seem to be in short supply.” I felt him stiffen next to me and felt an immediate pang of regret.
“Well, I wanted to bring Melissa. But, she couldn’t make it. You would’ve liked her, George. She always had to step in when she thought something was wrong. Always spoke up.” My gut clenched, listening to Logan speak about her in such an emotionless voice – speaking in past tense.
“Shit man. I’m so sorry. Shutting up.” Xavi started licking my hand and whining at me. I looked him in the eyes and scratched him behind the ears to let him know I was okay. Logan watched us together, his expression unreadable.
“Does he actually help you?”
“I can’t even express how much. We had to learn how to be around each other, but this guy’s a lot smarter than I am and has taught me a lot.” I commanded Xavi to move between us and Logan scratched his head between his floppy ears.
“You’re a good boy, aren’t you?” Xavi responded with a hearty tail thump and a grin, which made Logan smile.
“Xavi is special, but if you watch Slinky and Cal, or Skipper with Rachel, or even Tuck and his little mutt, I’ve come to think everyone should have a four-legged friend. They do make life more bearable.”
Logan didn’t answer. He kept rubbing Xavi down and got his arms licked in response.
“Melissa was an undergrad student at University of California Santa Barbara. I was still at Davis, guest mentoring with their agriculture program, and some buddies and I went down to go surfing.” He fell silent again, and folded his hands in his lap.
“Anyway. Turned out, she had cancer. We didn’t get very long, but what we had was…it was good.” I grabbed his shoulder and squeezed tight. Tears stung my eyes, and I automatically sought out Cal, who was smiling and glowing surrounded by people who loved her.
“Is there anything I can say at this point?”
“No, George. She’s gone, and I’m here. I’m just glad I got to see tonight. I was ready to throw down on you if you hadn’t figured it out. Not gonna lie. I’m just…I’m just really happy that you chose not to throw away the best thing that will ever happen to you.”
“Thanks.” I paused. “You here for a bit?” He nodded, and kept wringing his hands.
“I need to find something to do. I’ve lost my taste for farming. I love the land, but, I can’t stand all the alone time anymore.” I had the inkling of an idea.
“You know, I went back to Drake Construction. I can’t work for my father-in-law.” Logan snorted.
“No, that would almost be as bad as working for Dad.”
“My thought exactly. So, I cashed out my share in the ranch and I’m going it alone.”
“How’d that go over?” I laughed at him.
“Better than I expected, but proposing to Cal helped.” I paused and took a deep breath. “Maybe you should think about coming along for the ride. I mean, a partner would make things a lot easier, and the startup capital and at least a first client is already there, so…anyway. Think about it. The ranch is pretty well handled, and all that studying you did in geology and agriculture could be handy.”
“Yeah, I could see that. I’ll think about it.”
“Good. Now, how about we go get a couple of beers and steer the talk away from weddings for a bit. I have a feeling my life is about to get very expensive.” Logan nudged me with his shoulder.
“Drink beer and forget, for tomorrow you’ll be broke.” I scoffed and nodded.
“And, I’ve never been happier.” Cal looked over at me like she’d heard. I walked towards her and she held out a beer. With a laugh, I joined her on the loveseat and she tucked into my side with her head on my shoulder. Rachel reached into the ice bucket at her elbow and handed Logan a bottle as he sat across from us on a chair.
There was a howl of pain from the garden and Logan and I jumped off our seats, starting toward the sound. Tucker ran up, taking the steps to the deck two at a time and skidding to a stop in front of Mom and Rachel.
“Are you dripping on my veranda?” my mother gasped, feigning shock and dismay, while fighting a grin.
“I’m about to be dripping in your house, if someone doesn’t get me a towel,” Tucker groused. Mom scoffed and left to fetch a towel, while Tucker shivered and shuffled closer to the fire to warm up.
“You do know it’s the middle of summer, right?” I asked. He glared at my arched eyebrows.
“Bucket of fucking ice water. No, I’m sorry, three fucking buckets, of fucking ice water.” He took off his shirt and wrung it out on the veranda, away from the fireplace hearth. “Heathens,” he griped. He glared at the figures approaching us. “You’re heathens.”
Jackson, Pete, and Daniel stood leaning against each other for support while they laughed, Daniel wiping tears from his eyes. Tuck turned his back on them, and the laughter got louder. I glanced over and my eyes met Logan’s. I fought not to smile, but the laughter erupted from us both, until I had to sit back down. I out my arm around my girl, and even Tucker’s shoulders started to shake as he stood with his back to us.
“I hate you. I hope you don’t forget it,” Tucker growled, but his grin belied his words. By the time Mom had brought out towels and a set of Dad’s clothes for Tuck to borrow, we were all fighting off the giggles like we were kids again. No one had stopped long enough to even tell us why they’d done it, so Mom had to ask.
“Mom, it was just…spur of the moment. “We had a bunch of ice, and we’d emptied a couple of the buckets of their beer, so we thought it would be funny to add more water to the ice. Tucker just happened to be the first guy to walk by.”
“Lucky me.”
“Oh, boys. Never a dull moment.” Mom sighed and patted Tucker on the shoulder. “Welcome home, Logan. Your bedroom has fresh sheets and fresh toiletries in the bathroom. Okay, honey?” The look in her eyes said she knew something was wrong, but she wouldn’t push. She’d spent a lot of years as the only or one of the only women on the ranch. One of the many things she understood was how her men ticked.
She told us Dad and Tom had headed off to the office to discuss business, which meant they were probably talking about my choice to subcontract for Tom instead of work for him. Pete said his goodnight and headed back to the cabin he now shared with Verica. She’d taken off earlier to go to bed.
I looked around the circle of my brothers, amazed at how we’d all turned out. Tucker was still damp from the waist down, but had put on Dad’s shirt and was still standing with his back to the low fire. Logan sat on the other side of Cal, just like he had back in the days of shyly crushing on her when he was in middle school. He was just as quiet now, content to hold onto his feelings and not let them leak onto the family.
I was uncomfortable talking about getting married when my brother had just lost someone he loved. I knew better than to talk about his loss, so I said nothing, and after all the laughter, the silence between us felt like a sonic boom, heavy and deafening.
It was finally Rachel who broke it, asking about the thefts at Drake Construction and if we’d figured out who it was. Cal said we had a short list, but one man stood out, and I pointed out that we were going to find out the next day when we went back to town with Jackson, who was going to do his computer forensics hoodoo on the company servers.
“Can I come in with y’all?” Logan chimed in “I don’t want to be in the way, but if I’m going to consider the opportunity you suggested, I’d like to see what you’re doing.” He looked at me and I grinned.
“Of course. Anything that gets you to say ‘yes’ is fine with me.”
“What if I find out you’re a complete business moron?” He arched an eyebrow at me.
“That’s only more likely to get you to agree to it because you’d be worried for Cal.” Cal laughed and Tucker tilted his head at us.
“George, my amazing, hardworking, brilliant husband-to-be, is also going into business for himself. Which I think was an attempt to get a simple, inexpensive wedding out of sympathy for him.”
“I will give you a huge wedding if we catch the asshole stealing from your dad,” I promised her. She put her head back down on my shoulder.
“I just don’t understand why. Everyone makes a better wage working for my dad than they would anywhere else in Texas, maybe even most states. They get holidays and benefits, and Dad treats everyone like family.” She sighed. “Even his girlfriend was a nice person, who apologized to Mom.” She glanced at me. “She doesn’t work for him anymore. He gave her a good severance, and she quit very quietly and disappeared.”
“Good, I guess. If she still worked for him, I’d wonder if she was the one stealing.”
“I’d thought the same thing.” Cal laughed and looked around the patio. “Who would’ve thought George would go from horse trainer, to construction worker, to sniper, to super detective construction working businessman?” She took a melodramatic breath and there were chuckles from my brothers.
“Married man,” Logan added. “Don’t forget married man. The family pool was that he’d wait too long and be alone for the rest of his life after you finally got married to someone else.” Tucker scoffed and saluted with his beer.
“I put five bucks on that.”
“Yeah, now you owe me five bucks,” Danny quipped. “Logan, you owe me ten.” I clutched my heart.
“Where’s the loyalty?” Cal leaned up and kissed my cheek.
“Right here, baby. Right here.”
24. Callie
The beer slowly disappeared and the fire burned low. Even the laughter was subdued in the growing stillness of the late evening. I snuggled into the scent and warmth of the man I loved and rested my toes on Slinky, scrunching them up to gently massage her back while she lay at my feet. Someone had turned on music, and the low, hypnotic strains of Leonard Cohen harmonized with the alcohol singing in my blood to dull the edges of my thoughts.
The group dwindled, until it was George, me, Rachel, and Logan by the fire. Danny had gone to put Skipper to bed, and with a nudge, Xavier reminded George that it was his bedtime, too. George helped me to my feet, snagged the last two beers, and we took the dogs to my room. As the pups turned circles in their nests, he took my hand and led me out to the patio that the guest rooms shared.
The stars were even brighter here on the dark side of the property, and after I grabbed a light sweater to combat the cool mountain air, we sat together in silence, his arms around me, while I spun the ring on my finger and played with it in the dark.
“What are you thinking about?” He hugged me tighter against him as he asked.
“I was wondering what would make a person steal from someone who trained them well, paid them well, and treated them like friends and family.”
“Not what I thought you were going to say.” I laughed.
“I guess not. But tonight, we all sat together, family, friends, coworkers. No one would ever bring harm to the others, or to your dad.”
“But, that’s not always true.” He went on to tell me of his new sister-in-law’s run in with former ranch hands who had attacked her and poor Skipper, back when she was an intern.
“But, they were fired. I guess that’s’ what’s important here. Not why they did it, but making it stop. Dad doesn’t even seem to care about the money. Just the safety of the people who use or live in his buildings.”
“Well, Tucker’s condo is in one of those buildings, so I care that they’re safe, too,” he replied. He popped the top on a can of Coors’ and handed it to me. “We both know that the foreman, Bill Allred, is the one doing this. Probably not alone, but his name is all over it. Tomorrow, we’ll have Jackson go back through the computer system that Bill can’t touch and see how far back it goes.”
“I like Bill.”
“Yeah, I was just
thinking that. He’s such a great guy, and I still remember watching him hold everything together when his wife got cancer and died. I feel guilty.” He took a swig from his beer and sighed. I felt the heaviness that settled on his shoulders, sagging them down as they collapsed under the weight of his loyalty.
“Oh, George. You can’t feel bad for doing the right thing. What Dad chooses to do with Bill is up to him. Dad and Bill and whoever started the fire that hurt Slinky will have a coming to Jesus. But, you did your job. A bookkeeper would just be less likely to notice that one job site had residential versus commercial grade supplies.” He sighed.
“Being a soldier was easy compared to this.” He ran his fingers through my hair. “But the benefits to being home are much better.”
“I think after this, your sleep will be even better. Between me and Xavi, we got your back.”
“I think Slinky fancies herself a service dog, too. Everything she sees Xavi do, she copies.”
“I don’t want to lose her, but if we find her a good fit, I have to let her go.”
“Don’t worry, one problem at a time. First, your dad, then my new company name, then a wedding…Slinky doesn’t need to go anywhere. We’re a family now. Train her up, and she can finally stop being the only slacker in the house.”
He held me until I drifted off to sleep against his shoulder. When I woke, the moon was high in the sky and my lover was stargazing. I sat up to give his arm a break and he looked down at me.
“The sky is different here,” he mused. His voice was distant and tense.
“Without the city lights?”
“No. On this continent. The sky in the Middle East is as foreign as the people. There were times we’d get bombed all day, and if the sky cleared enough at night to see them, there was no comfort in the stars. They were beautiful, but cold and strange.”
“But, now you’re home.”
“On a night like this, it’s easy to feel that way. Working for your dad feels that way, too. Familiar – easy to show up and know my place.”