Under Her Skin

by Michelle Love

  The official story was that Josh had been hit by a car on his way back from work. It could have so easily been an accident except that the driver had backed up over Josh’s prone body – twice. It had all been caught on CCTV but the car, a plain black RV had blacked out windows and no plates. The police had no leads but Jess had an overwhelming sense of foreboding and when finally she, Theo and Max were alone, after Josh’s cremation, Max said what they had all been thinking.

  ‘Fucking Gachet did this.’

  Max looked terrible as if he’d been smoking six packs a day and drinking straight bourbon. Jess closed her eyes for a moment, trying to quell the nausea that threatened.

  ‘I don’t understand. Why would Jules kill Josh? How would Jules even know Josh?’ Her voice was scratchy and low. Max wouldn’t look at her and she felt the heavy weight of guilt settle over her.

  Theo and Max exchanged a look then Theo nodded, once, brief, stiff. Max sat down opposite Jess and took her hands. ‘We were trying to make things better… for you…. I…’

  ‘I asked Max to look into Jules’ background,’ Theo interrupted his friend, ‘He’d hurt you, had threatened your life. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you but there you have it. It was for the best.’

  Jess pulled away from Max’s hands. ‘You were investigating me?’

  ‘Jules, not you. But obviously, there was some overlap. After Max talked to Camilla, we realised exactly what he’d been doing to you. We had to do something/?’

  Jess had gone very still. ‘You talked to Camilla? Did Jules know?’

  The room echoed with their silence. ‘Oh Jesus…’ Jess sank to the floor, curling her knees up to her chest. Theo bent to touch her but she shied away from him.

  For a long time no-one said anything then Theo looked at Max, who nodded and left the room. Jess got up and paced around the room while Theo watched in silence. Finally, she turned to him.

  ‘This is my fault. My fault. He told me he would hurt people I cared about and I dismissed it as…why? It’s my fault Camilla and Josh are dead. I should just have let him kill me.’

  ‘Stop it!’ Theo was furious as she had ever seen him. ‘None of this is your fault. It’s him, it’s Gachet.’

  ‘Who is my problem, Theo. I did this. I tried to escape from him and…’

  ‘You shouldn’t have had to ‘escape’ from anyone. What you went through… he’s a monster. How old were you when he first raped you?’

  The question, so simple, so straightforward, made her crumple. Theo gathered her to him as she sobbed. ‘You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,’ his voice was gentle,’ but please, put it out of your mind that it’s your fault. We need to go to the police, tell them everything.’

  Her sobs subsided but she sighed, defeated. ‘They won’t believe me. They didn’t then and I got punished.’

  Theo was silent for a long moment. ‘Then we need to break that cycle.’

  Jess was quiet for a long time before she pulled away from him. ‘I can stop this by… I can’t let anyone else get hurt because I fell in love with you. I need to take responsibility for that. I need to make this right. I need to go.’

  Dread was flooding through Theo’s body as he took in what she was saying.

  ‘Wait, Jess. You can’t be serious? Are you ending this? Us? No, no, we can’t let him win, please.’

  He reached for her but she ducked away.

  ‘No, Theo please, don’t, I can’t bear it. I love you, god, so, so much but we need to take so time to figure out everything. People have died, there’s so much damage.’ She was brushing her tears from her face and it broke his heart. ‘Please, just…. let me go. Give me time to figure how I can make it stop, make him stop.’

  Theo nodded, trying to hide his heartbreak. He picked up her coat and draped it around her shoulders. Tipping up her face to his, he kissed her tenderly. ‘Okay…. okay, Jess you can have all the time you need, all the time. But know this. I’ll wait forever. I love you.’

  Fresh tears poured her cheeks and he kissed them away. ‘I love you too,’ she whispered, ‘You are my heart.’

  His gut twisted as he kissed her mouth then, tasting her lips, lingering, not knowing when he would kiss them again – if he would kiss them again.

  Eventually, she broke away from him and picked up her bag. ‘I have to go.’

  Hand-in-hand, they walked to the door and he opened it for her, and – his heart shattering into a million pieces - watched the love of his life walk out of it.

  He called down to the limo driver. ‘Make sure she gets where she wants to go safely.’

  Then he hung up the phone and as Max came back into the room, he looked at his friend and knew he shared his pain.

  ‘She’s gone, Max. I had to let her go.’ And he began to sob.

  Jules, parked in the shadows away from the gaze of the security guards, sat up as he saw her walk out of Storm’s apartment building. He smiled when he saw she was crying.

  ‘Don’t worry, my Jessica,’ he whispered to himself, ‘You’ll be dead soon.

  So very, very soon.’

  Hurt With Me Part Six

  It was so much worse that she’d imagined. Jess bent over at the waist then when that wouldn’t quell the nausea, she darted to the small bathroom in her hotel room and threw up and up. When she finally stood, rinsed her mouth at the sink then went out to the suite, the papers were still there, the television reports were still on the t.v. and the photographs of her and Jules, young and apparently care-free, assaulted her vision.

  ‘Theo Storm’s Girlfriend’s Secret Shame’. Every word battered her, the lies, the hideous twisting of facts that made her a temptress who seduced every rich man she could – even her own step-brother, even as she was a young teen. Some asshole in the police department – more than likely with a kick-back from Jules - had leaked the police interviews where she’d been branded a fantasist, a liar. Everything, everything, was twisted and wrong and so evil she could barely breathe. She wanted to feel angry, searched for that feeling in the melee of emotions that overcame her but all she could feel was shame. Humiliation. Hopelessness.

  The frantic rapping at the motel room door made her jump and she quelled, her entire body trembling as she stared at the thin wood frame rattling.

  ‘Jess? It’s me, sweetheart.’

  She flew to the door, yanking it open and falling, sobbing into Theo’s arms. He gathered up into his arms and kicked the door shut behind then. Carrying her, he sat down on the bed and rocked her until her sobs turned into sniffs and shivers. He pressed his lips to her temple.

  ‘I’m so sorry, baby,’ he murmured. ‘For all of it. I’d ask why Jules would do this but I already know. We’ll get through this and I’ll make that fucker pay, I promise you I will.’

  Jess said nothing but nuzzled closer to him, her lips pressed against his neck. He tilted her chin up and kissed her, his arms tightening around her protectively.

  ‘I miss you,’ she whispered and Theo groaned and pulled onto the bed, his hands slipping under her t-shirt and pulling it over her head. Feverishly, Jess kicked her jeans off and unbuttoned Theo’s shirt. He’d obviously just come from the office and he was wearing the blue shirt that she loved on him, the one that brought out his green eyes and complimented his dark hair perfectly.

  ‘It’s been hell without you, Jess, actual hell…’

  She was straddling him and he gazed up at her, his eyes soft with the relief of being with her. It made her heart jolt to see the hurt on his face. I did this. I hurt him. I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry….

  Jess ran her hands over his hard chest and leaned down to press her lips against his. ‘For me too. I’m so sorry, Theo.’

  With one quick move, he flipped her onto her back and gazed down at her. ‘Stop apologizing. You and me, that’s all that matters.’

  She coiled her legs around his waist and she could feel the hot length of his cock nudging against her damp sex. ‘I want you inside me, Theo, now, f
orever.’

  He smiled, though his eyes were still tired and anxious. He trailed his lips along her jaw, pressed them to the hollow of her throat. ‘Jess, you are my life…’

  His cock slid into her welcoming cunt, filling her, and as he began to slide in and out, she tensed her muscles to grip him, keep him locked inside of her, her body taking control and cleaving to him, skin to skin. She rocked her hips against him as his thrusts became ever harder and faster, gasping out her pleasure, calling his name.

  What began as tender lovemaking suddenly became something else, abandoned, uncontrolled, brutal. Their desperate need to erase everything that had happened lately, just to get back to the feral desire that had driven their entire relationship. Jess begged Theo to please, fuck her harder, harder and Theo responded, his kisses rough and greedy, biting down on her shoulders hard enough to leave teeth marks, his immense strength and size having complete command over her body. They both lost themselves in the storm of sensations that raged through them and when, finally, they both came, crying out and shouting their love over and over, it seemed as if the rest of the world had simply melted away.

  Jess lay, locked in Theo’s protective arms, stroking his damp face, drinking him in. Neither of them spoke for a long time, not wanting to break the spell.

  Finally, Theo traced the shape of her lips with his forefinger. ‘Jess… my Jessie… I know this is all unbelievably horrific, what Jules has been doing. But I want you to know, there’s nothing I won’t do to keep you safe, nothing I won’t do to make this better for you. I only ask this – please don’t shut me out again. Whatever happens from now on, we do together. Promise me.’

  She gazed up into his impossibly handsome face and smiled, her body relaxing as she let herself believe that everything would be okay as long as they were together.

  ‘I promise you, Theodore Storm.’

  The smiled and took her left hand in his. ‘There’s just one other thing.’

  She smiled and brushed her lips against his. ‘What’s that?’

  ‘Jessica Wood, would you do me the great honor of marrying me?’

  Jules sat in front of the pile of newspapers running the story and could have laughed. Two birds with one stone – destroy Jess and Storm’s reputations. Well, he thought, destroy may be an overstatement. Sullied. That was better, he liked that. I sullied their reputations as sure as I sullied Jessica a long time ago. He could still remember that first time, the complete trust of the naïve, the unlocked bedroom door of the twelve-year-old Jess. Her long dark hair spread across her pillow.

  ‘Boss?’

  Jules looked up. A smug-looking Malcolm stood in the doorway. Jules smiled at him. His partner-in-crime.

  ‘What’s up, Malccy? Have a seat, buddy.’

  Malcolm grinned at the nickname and sat down opposite Jules, pulling out a sheaf of papers and handing them to him. Jules ran his eyes down the documents and smiled. ‘Perfect.’

  ‘Are you sure you want to do this?’

  Jules nodded. ‘Oh yes. Keep them wrong-footed, confused. Jess won’t be alive long enough to enjoy it anyways.’

  ‘I wanted to talk to you about that,’ Malcolm took a deep breath in. ‘I’m prepared to do Jessica for you, boss, I’m prepared to take the rap. Just say the word and I’ll stick my knife in her. It would be my pleasure.’

  Jules grinned at Malcolm, gratified that he would do that for him, excited by the other man’s bloodlust. He enjoyed killing as much as Jules did – it was what bound them together, what made Malcolm so loyal. He’d killed that homo’s husband without being asked twice, came home and they both enjoyed the retelling of it.

  ‘Thank you, Malcolm, but she’s mine. I’ll be the one to kill Jessica.’ He considered for a moment. ‘You can kill Storm if you like – but not until he’s had time to grieve Jess. I want him to feel that pain, Malccy.’

  Malcolm laughed. ‘Deal.’ Jules could see the calculations begin in his mind, how he would do it, the pleasure he would take.

  ‘Until then, however…. this.’ He waved the documents in front of Malcolm. ‘I’m going to enjoy this. They’ll never see me coming.’

  Jess looked up as her assistant Molly tapped on the door. She’d been back at work for weeks now but still came in early so she could miss everybody’s curious stares, barricading herself in her office with a pile of paperwork. Occasionally someone would walk past her office and she would look away from their gaze. Now, though, she saw that Molly wore a smile and no pity and she was glad.

  ‘Can I order you some lunch, Jess? I was just going to get a sandwich but I can order out if you’d like?’

  Jess smiled at her. ‘Thanks, Mols, ham on rye will be fine. Has anyone called?’

  Molly rolled her eyes. ‘Press, mostly. Don’t worry,’ she added seeing Jess’s face pale, ‘I dealt with them.’ She pretended to wield a baseball bat, patting it into her palm.

  Jess laughed. Molly Che might be five foot nothing and tiny but she could be fierce when it was needed. Jess had liked her immediately when they’d met and when Theo assigned Molly as her assistant, Jess and the young woman quickly became firm friends. Jess realized it had been a while since she’d had a really good girlfriend. The few she’d had always been scared off by Jules’s creepy come-ons. Jess was suddenly amused by the thought of Molly ‘dealing’ with Jules. Hell, she might buy her an assistant a real baseball bat, just in case.

  ‘You rock, Mols. When lunch comes, why don’t you come in and eat with me? I could do with a good gossip.’

  ‘You’re on. Jess?’

  ‘Yes?’

  Molly shifted her weight and leaned against the doorframe. ‘In case you were worried, no one believes that crap in the papers. Not one person. They’re all on your side.’

  Jess felt tears prickle in her eyes. ‘Thank you, Molly. That means the world to me.’

  Molly grinned. ‘You’re family. No one messes with our family.’

  She left Jess alone then. Jess dashed away the tears that had settled on her cheeks. Family. That word had been a source of pain for so long now she hardly recognized it. Grow a thicker skin, she told herself fiercely. Her phone rang then and even without looking at the screen, she knew who it was. She answered the call with a smile in her voice.

  ‘Hello, beautiful man.’

  Theo laughed and she enjoyed the rich sound of it. ‘That’s a nice way to be greeted. How’re things, sweetheart?’

  He was in New York, a continent away, for a meeting he couldn’t reschedule. Anyway, she had told him, they weren’t going to be dictated to by anyone else’s agenda. She’d insisted he go, telling him she had Max, Molly and Alan and a whole squad of security. Now, though, hearing his voice, she wished she’d gone with him.

  ‘Good, except I miss you.’

  ‘Me too, darling. I’ll try to be back as soon as I can but this meeting’s running late already. You staying with Max tonight?’

  ‘Sure am – I think he’s doing better. At least, that’s the impression he’s trying to give. God, Theo, I feel so guilty – ‘

  ‘Stop it. Max doesn’t blame you, no-one blames you. You being there is good for him. He loves you, y’know. You’re his family now.’

  There was that word again. Every time she heard it, it made her a bit braver, hardened her heart against Jules’ machinations.

  ‘I love you, Mr. Storm.’ Her voice was soft, full of love and she heard him sigh happily.

  ‘Love you too, almost-Mrs. Storm.’

  She smiled. ‘Call me later.’

  After he’d said goodbye, she held her left hand up, enjoying the glint from the solitaire diamond she now wore on it. Mrs. Storm. She could get used to that. Jessica Storm. She’s said yes to Theo without hesitation the day he’d proposed, the day of the scandal, the newspapers. In that hotel room. She didn’t have any doubts, even now, a few weeks later. They were meant to be together. For as long as I allow you to live. Jules’ words came back to her then, a body-slam and she bent over, tr
ying to quell the nausea that hit her.

  ‘You okay?’

  Molly was at the door again, her dark eyes filled with concern. Jess tried to smile. ‘I’m fine, just a little nausea.’

  Molly handed her a brown paper bag with a sandwich in then sat down opposite her. Studying her. ‘You’re not pregnant, are you?’

  Jess shook her head. ‘Definitely not.’ Then, a wave of amusement came over her. ‘Nope, no little gold-digger spawn for me just yet.’

  Molly laughed, clearly relieved that she was okay. ‘Shame, though. You and Theo will have the most beautiful babies.’

  Jess flushed with pleasure. ‘Thank you, but woah horsey. We’ve never talked about kids, let’s just be happily engaged for a bit.’

  Molly pouted then laughed. They chatted through lunch and by the time Molly went back to her own desk, Jess was feeling good again. She glanced once more at her engagement before shoving everything to the back of her mind and getting on with her work.

  Theo shook the hands of his colleagues and went to find an empty office. He switched on his laptop, and as he was waiting for it to fire up, he switched his phone back on. A text from Jess…

  Pretty sure Max has soundproof walls… wake me when you get in tonight, I’ll make it worth your while. I love you, J xx.

  Theo grinned and shot her a reply.

  I look forward to it, beautiful. I love you.

  Then he flicked through his call log. Three missed calls. Same as yesterday and the day before and the day before that. Theo sighed. Time to bite the bullet. He pressed the call button and let it ring.

  She answered on the third ring.

  ‘Theodore Storm, where the hell have you been?’

  Theo let a long breath and cleared his throat.

  ‘Hi, Mom, how have you been?’

  At almost five, Molly knocked on her door again. Jess blinked, trying to get her head out of the file she was looking at. Molly was frowning.