He paused, his gaze hopping from her eyes to her lips, and everything faded until all that was here was this moment between them that would change everything. She wished she could live in this space where she didn’t have to worry if they were doing something wrong, where Aiden had always been hers and could always be hers.
His mouth descended on hers like the softest spring rain, and for a second that sweetness was all she wanted. For a second. She let herself get lost in the reality of Aiden. He wasn’t a fantasy anymore. His lips were firm but gentle against hers, until they weren’t.
She gasped against his mouth, and then his hand tightened around her nape, and her hands travelled up his arms, over the hard muscles, holding on to him, wanting to be closer to him. He made a deep noise that made her feel like her body was on fire as she followed him down into a reclining position on the couch. Not a thing in the world had prepared her for this, for the feeling of Aiden’s hard body beneath hers or the feeling of his large hands on her body. He kept that one hand behind her neck, like he couldn’t let her go, while the other hand traced the side of her and then cupped her butt while still kissing her.
She couldn’t get close enough to him. She was so in over her head, yet it wasn’t enough. His hand slipped under her shirt, and she inhaled sharply at the feel of his large, warm hand against her bare skin.
The ringing of his cell phone stopped them both. “Emergency,” she whispered hoarsely, untangling herself from him. “I told you there would be an emergency call.”
He groaned and rolled over, grabbing his phone and staring at the ID and then back at her. “And I told you there would be no emergency.”
Instead of grinning or teasing her about being right, the color left his face, and he turned his phone face down on the coffee table. He sat up and rubbed the back of his neck.
She straightened her shirt and tried not to stare at him, but it felt like she was in shock. One minute she was plastered against his body, and now they were sitting side by side on the couch like strangers. “Who was on the phone? Was it Logan?”
Instead of him telling her, his jaw clenched, and he didn’t say anything.
She took a deep breath and stood. “Okay, fine.”
“Janie…” he said, his voice filled with something she couldn’t quite decipher.
She stood still. “Yes?”
He turned to her, his gaze travelling up the length of her body, the heat in his eyes almost making her want to throw herself on top of him again. But it was the other thing, the tension in his body that made her stop.
“It was Maxi.”
Her stomach dropped. “Oh.”
“It’s nothing,” he said quickly. “Probably something she forgot to tell me after our phone call.”
“Oh. Sure.” Panic stabbed at her chest, and she tried her best to appear indifferent. He didn’t want to tell her anything about that call, and the truth was, that hurt. She was used to being directly involved in anything that had to do with Will. Now she was an outsider.
He swallowed hard. “It wasn’t a productive conversation, but I had questions I needed answers to.”
“Of course.” She crossed her arms over her chest, suddenly feeling cold.
This was all so awkward now because of who Maxi was, how she handled people. Maxi hadn’t even bothered to return one of her phone calls. All those years Janie had tried to give her sister the benefit of the doubt, to be civil for Will’s sake. And now she was being treated like she was nothing.
She needed her space and turned to walk away, but Aiden stood. “Hey,” he said in a soft voice, taking her wrist gently.
She bit her lip in an effort to quell the sudden emotion hitting her. “It’s fine.”
“It’s not fine. Nothing she’s done is fine. I don’t want to talk to her because I’m here with you. I don’t want to get upset over her and ruin our night.” He took a step closer to her.
“You don’t owe me explanations,” she said, confused by the conflicting emotions running through her. Was she insecure? Jealous? Did she even have a right to be? Of course, she didn’t. She and Aiden were nothing. They were just co-parenting until it was time for her to leave.
This would just be a memory. The little family they were becoming would just be a memory.
As for Aiden’s relationship with Maxi, that wasn’t her business, either. Just because she had feelings for Aiden didn’t make them a couple. It didn’t make any of this right. And even if they were never in a relationship like that again, Aiden and Maxi would always have Will connecting them. Her sister wasn’t just some bad ex from his past—she was his son’s mother.
“I don’t want this to be awkward between us,” he said, his voice thick.
Too late.
She finally lifted her eyes to his and read the sincerity there. He was everything she’d ever wanted, and he could never be hers. “I don’t know how to do this, Aiden. I don’t know what that kiss was.”
“The best damn thing ever,” he said, a corner of his lips tilting upward.
She felt her body heat at his enthusiasm. She was also relieved that he felt the same way and that he wasn’t going to say it was actually a mistake. But that didn’t make this any less complicated. “What, though, really? Besides…being good? What about Will? Or am I reading too much into everything. Was that just two lonely people on a couch during a blizzard?”
“I’m not lonely,” he said flatly.
“You know what I mean,” she said, wanting answers without trying to look like she was fishing for him to say it was more than that. Because that wouldn’t solve the problem, either.
“I don’t know what to tell you. The minute I saw you in my bar that night, I thought you were the most gorgeous woman I’d ever laid eyes on—”
“Aiden. Please. You don’t have to pay me compliments and flatter me. I’ve heard of your fan club. You don’t have to treat me like I’m one of them. I’m perfectly fine the way I am,” she said, her voice trailing off when his brows snapped together.
“There are so many things wrong with what you just said I don’t even know where to start. I’m not just trying to flatter you. You were—you are—the most gorgeous woman I’ve ever met. It was insta-attraction for me, and that was before I knew you took my kid in and raised him. When I started piecing together the kind of person you are, that attraction skyrocketed, and this—the kiss—was after weeks of me holding back because I didn’t know if you felt the same thing, I didn’t want to jeopardize this friendship we’re building, and…other reasons. The situation is complicated; you know that. But don’t ever tell me that I don’t think you’re beautiful and don’t ever short-change yourself or put yourself down in that roundabout way. Letting someone else tell you who you are and what you’ll amount to is shit. Don’t do it.”
Her heart was pounding as she stared at him, feeling like he was talking about something else as well. “That’s not what I was doing.”
He cocked his head to the side. “Then what were you doing? You basically doubted everything I just said about you.”
“I think I have trouble accepting…compliments. But let’s just say this is real—then what about Will?”
He folded his arms across his chest. “Right. I’ve thought about that, too. I’m just starting to earn his trust. I have no idea how he’s processing all this. How he would handle it if I’m now in a relationship with his mother’s sister. So…you’re right. This shouldn’t happen. But I also don’t want to take it back.”
“Neither do I.” She sighed. “So what do we do now?”
“No idea.” His gaze landed on her mouth, and her lips parted.
A delicious swirl of desire, a kind she’d never experienced before tonight, made its way through her, into her core, at the sound of that raspy voice.
He lowered his head and—
All the lights went ou
t, plunging them into darkness.
…
Aiden added another log to the fire, satisfied that would keep them warm for a while. Though he wasn’t too concerned about keeping warm, really, because he could think of plenty more exciting ways to do it than lighting a fire.
After the lights went out, they’d scrambled to get to the kitchen, where Aiden kept his flashlights and candles. Janie had taken care of lighting the candles and spreading them around the living room while he made a few trips to the back porch to bring in enough firewood to last the night.
He didn’t know what the hell kind of situation he’d just gotten into. It was his fault. He’d initiated everything, and he didn’t regret it one bit. As he’d predicted, kissing Janie would be explosive. The moment he’d touched her, even without kissing her, he’d known he’d be a goner. Then when he’d finally kissed her, he hadn’t wanted to stop.
And being stopped by her sister was probably the sickest twist of fate he’d ever experienced.
He knew what Janie was saying; he got that this was complicated. And he couldn’t hurt Will. Hell, he hadn’t asked for this, either, and had sworn to himself he couldn’t ever start anything with Janie. But he was only a man, and their connection, their chemistry, was too much to ignore. He’d wanted to peel off her clothes and spend the night in bed with her.
That phone call was for the best, in retrospect. So now, he was her platonic friend, Aiden. Nothing else.
He didn’t know how to handle her self-image. The strange part of that whole thing was that Janie was normally so confident. She’d accomplished a lot for someone her age and someone with a kid to raise on their own. She’d walked into his bar with her chin held high and a steady gaze.
Then she thought he was lying about finding her so attractive. And she hadn’t said that in a way that signalled she was fishing for more compliments. No, she’d said it so nonchalantly, as though it was an undisputed fact. He knew nothing he could say would change her mind if she didn’t believe it herself, and he understood that. All too well.
“Are you warm enough?” Aiden asked, placing the poker back in the stand, then turning away from the fire.
Janie huddled into the corner of the couch. “Yes, this is great.”
He wanted to pull her over to him to warm her up, but he knew that couldn’t happen. “As long as we have a fire, we’ll be fine. I bet the power comes on before morning. Probably a downed tree hitting a power line or something.”
She stared vacantly at the fire, looking lost in thought. He wondered if she was thinking the same thing he was about warming each other up in different ways.
“Do you think I should text him?” she said.
Aiden flopped onto the couch, keeping a safe distance between them. “Who?”
“Will.”
Okay, then. They were not thinking of the same thing.
It’s not that he hadn’t thought of Will tonight. He had. Quite a few times, actually, which had surprised him. Will had come to mean so much to him in such a short amount of time, and he was already used to having him around.
But his thoughts were more just hoping Will was having a good time. He wanted Will to fit into Wishing River as though he’d lived here his entire life. Janie’s thoughts seemed more of the worry, paranoid variety. “Didn’t we already go over this?”
Her brows knit together as she frowned at him. “Well now there’s not only a blizzard but there’s also no power.”
“They probably have power, since they’re closer to town and Logan’s place has a generator,” he said, propping his feet on the coffee table. Hopefully that would reassure her.
“I think I should text him.”
He laughed. “Go ahead. Text him.”
She ran her teeth over her lower lip and grabbed her phone off the coffee table. “Great. I’m glad you think it’s a good idea, too.”
“What? That’s not what I said at all. Don’t tell him I said it was a good idea to text him. I have to win him over still. It’s early on, and I still have a chance at being perceived as cool. All I have going for me right now is that he thinks I’m somewhat cool. That’s very hard to establish with fifteen-year-olds.”
She slowly put her phone down. “I thought I was the cool one.”
He shook his head slowly. “Sorry. You’re the overprotective but well-meaning parent.”
“Never mind.” She groaned. “You really think he’ll be fine there overnight?”
He tried to sound like a reassuring, confident parent, because that’s what Janie needed right now. “Of course he’ll be fine. Logan will call if there’s an emergency. Will would text you if he needed you. But if you need to hear from him, for peace of mind, just send him a quick text.”
She let out a long sigh. “No, you’re right. He’s fine. I need to learn to give him space. I did make him memorize those emergency secret codes to text, so I should stop worrying.”
He leaned forward. “What was that?”
“I read it on some parenting-teens blog. You make your teen memorize some emergency codes for different scenarios just in case someone is looking at their phone. Not actual codes. But like phrases that mean something else… Stop staring at me like that. I’m trying to let him grow up! I’m doing the best I can. I just don’t know how to do that very well.”
That odd pang that seemed to hit him in the chest every time she said something unintentionally revealing snuck through him. She was so protective and so close to Will because she loved him unconditionally and because she’d given him everything of herself. Sitting across from her, admiring the way the firelight seemed to highlight the lighter shades of brown in her hair, the way it accentuated the shape of her high cheekbones—her presence made him feel like he was a different man when he was with her.
“You do everything well,” he said. “I’m not judging your parenting. And I’m not one to give advice, because this is all new to me, but he’s safe. I never would have let him go if I thought there was any danger. I’ve known Logan since we were five. I trust him with my life.”
She let out a sigh. “Really?”
“Absolutely. I may be new to this, but I have a protective streak, too.”
Her eyes glistened. “I’m glad.”
He held her gaze for far too long, because thoughts of Will and parenting went out the window when her eyes went to his mouth. He stood abruptly. “Want another drink? Food?”
“I think that’s a good idea, and then it’s back to this room because it’s the only heated one in the house.”
Hell. He’d been planning on a quick drink to distract them and then going to bed. In separate rooms so he wouldn’t have to spend the night trying not to think about how attracted he was to her. He also wanted to avoid more personal conversations. She was standing in front of him now, staring at him expectantly, as though she’d just planned an evening with her BFF.
Well, that was promising. Perfect. They’d sit on opposite couches, and he’d pretend he was sitting with Logan.
She brushed past him, and the smell of lilacs hit him, and he swore under his breath. Logan didn’t smell anything like Janie.
“I’ll let you pick the snacks if that’s why you’re all pouty,” she said, patting his arm before walking into the kitchen.
Pouty. Not an adjective he wanted to be associated with. He needed to get his shit together, because who knew what adjective was coming up next.
He followed her into the kitchen and forced his gaze away from her as she stood on her tiptoes trying to reach the bag of chips on the top shelf. Her sweater pulled up to reveal smooth skin, and his eyes dipped lower, trailing the soft curves in front of him. He clenched his teeth and marched over to grab the bag of chips.
“Oh, great. Thanks,” she said, opening another cupboard. “At least you’ve gone from pouting to clenching your teeth together.”
&
nbsp; “What are you looking for now?” Not bothering to disagree, since he was clenching his teeth together.
“A bowl. I hate eating out of the bag.”
He grabbed a glass bowl from the top shelf just as she turned to face him, her breasts brushing against his chest, setting all his nerves on edge. He took a step back and headed straight for the fridge, jerking the door open and searching for beer like he was dehydrated. This wasn’t good. His reaction wasn’t good. None of this was good because it felt too good.
“Do you want a beer?” he said into the fridge.
When she didn’t answer, he turned around. Her face turned pink, and he had to turn away, because both of them very obviously fighting attraction was even worse for his self-control. “Do you have any more wine?” she said.
“Uh, yeah, I do.”
“Great. You get the drinks, and I’ll pour the bag of chips. What flavor is this, anyway?” She turned the bag around and focused the flashlight on it, then inhaled dramatically. “I would never have predicted this.”
He frowned. “What?”
“Well, you just don’t strike me as the regular chips kind of guy… These are just so…boring. Definitely not a cool-person flavor.”
He straightened his shoulders. “That’s not true. They’re the saltiest flavor, and I happen to like salt. They also go the best with beer, and—”
“And you happen to like beer.”
“You’re making all of this sound very bland. I drink other things than beer. I do own a bar.”
“It’s okay. I won’t tell Will about this.” Her tone was teasing him in more ways than one. “Because believe me, it’s not cool,” she said, opening the bag and dumping the chips into the bowl.
He poured her another glass of wine. “All right, ready. Lead the way.”
“It’s freezing in here. I might need another blanket,” she said as they entered the living room again.
“That’s probably a good idea. I’ll get one for you.” He knew that if the power didn’t come back on soon, they would have to sleep together to stay warm. He could probably handle it, but if Janie was already cold, she was going to freeze tonight. The way the wind was blowing through, the fire would only be able to do so much.
Wishing for a Cowboy Page 14