by Brenda Hiatt
“There!” said the midwife. “’Tis a fine baby girl.”
Juliana took one glance at the wet, wriggling creature in the midwife’s arms, and looked away. Was that how a healthy infant was supposed to look?
She glanced back at Philip and Catherine. They looked as if they were still anxiously awaiting something. What?
Then the baby cried out, making a sound like the bleating of a lamb.
“Thank God,” Cat breathed, and her grip on Juliana’s hand finally relaxed.
“Is she well, Mrs. McGinnis?” asked Philip. “She cries so softly.”
“Nonsense! She’s a fine little lady. Not all babies caterwaul the way you did. I thought they’d hear you all the way to Keswick.”
Cat giggled, and a moment later, Juliana joined in, laughing more from pent-up nerves than anything else. Then she moved aside with Philip as Jemima, Mrs. McGinnis and the nursery maid bustled about, taking care of Catherine and the baby.
Soon, Cat lay in bed, the baby quietly resting in her arms. Her face, though pale with exhaustion, seemed somehow transformed by an almost unearthly joy. Philip sat nearby, gazing lovingly at her. Once again, his expression reminded Juliana of Marcus.
A lump came to Juliana’s throat.
Then she looked at their daughter. She was so dreadfully tiny. Even though Mrs. McGinnis said she was healthy, many children did not survive infancy. How could such great joy depend on such a fragile source?
“Come see her, Jule,” said Catherine.
Juliana came a few steps closer. They’d put a lace cap on the child’s head, but silky, dark hair peeked out from the edges. Dark eyes gazed solemnly at nothing in particular, out of a face shaped rather like a muffin.
“She is lovely,” she said politely, fearing to comment on the baby’s size. After all, what did she know of babies?
“We are going to name her Elinor, after Philip’s mother,” said Catherine.
“Little Elinor,” said Philip to the child, encouraging her to grasp one of his fingers in her tiny fist.
The baby began to nuzzle at her mother. Mrs. McGinnis came forward to help Catherine put her daughter to breast for the first time, and Juliana took the opportunity to bid them goodnight. Minutes later, she slipped into her bed and curled up, trembling, exhausted and shaken by the power of what she had just witnessed.
Juliana slept late the next morning. Polly came to her when she awoke, bearing good tidings of Cat and her baby. Elinor had awoken several times in the wee hours to be fed, but was sleeping now. Cat was sleeping as well, and showed no signs of the fever they had dreaded so much.
Juliana went downstairs to eat a solitary breakfast, since Philip had already taken the children out to the garden. As she finished, Cat’s maid appeared with a tray in her hands.
“Lady Catherine is awake, and would be pleased if you would sit with her while she eats her breakfast,” she said.
Juliana nodded, and followed Jemima up the stairs to Philip and Catherine’s bedchamber. Cat was sitting up in the large, carved bed, feeding Elinor once more. Her maid set the tray on the bed beside her, and departed, leaving strict instructions to Juliana to call her if her mistress required anything.
Juliana sat down in the chair beside the bed.
“You look well, Cat,” she said, relieved to see the color back in her friend’s cheeks.
“I feel well, only a little tired,” Cat replied, shifting Elinor up over her shoulder.
Juliana blinked as the baby let out a belch that seemed all out of proportion with her size.
“I suppose it will be a while before Elinor is ready for polite society,” said Catherine, smiling at the child, whose eyelids were drooping. “Will you take her now, please?”
She gulped. “You wish me to take her?”
“It will be so much easier for me to eat my breakfast if you do. She is asleep now. You could hold her, or just set her down in the cradle, if you wish.”
Juliana looked toward the doorway, but no obliging servant appeared to relieve her of the task.
“Shall I call Jemima?” she asked desperately.
“Come, Jule. You can do this. I will show you how.”
Reluctantly, she accepted the infant from Cat, taking care to support her head and neck as directed. It was all of ten feet across the floor to the cradle; she did not dare attempt to carry Elinor so far. Instead, she sat back down in the seat beside the bed. Somehow, the infant managed to stay asleep through the entire perilous operation.
“See, she is quite comfortable with you,” said Cat, buttering a muffin, then taking a bite. “Holding a baby is so delightful, is it not?”
Juliana looked down at Elinor. Delightful? Terrifying was a better word.
“I’m such a coward!” she blurted out.
Cat set down her muffin. “Whatever do you mean?” she asked, blinking. “You are the most adventurous person I know.”
“Yes, I know, I’ve always said I wanted adventures. But I’m a coward nonetheless,” she replied, unaccustomed tears gathering in the corners of her eyes.
“What are you afraid of?” Cat asked gently.
“I’m afraid of holding Elinor. I’m afraid of going through what you endured last night. I’m afraid of how a baby might change my life. That I might become a domineering parent, like Grandpapa, or that I might… die and leave a child alone.”
Annoyingly, her tears began to flow. Catherine reached a hand over, patting her on the elbow, all she could reach. It was comforting, and yet somehow made the tears flow even more quickly.
“I’m afraid of loving Marcus, that he might stop loving me. That he might not forgive me for leaving him…”
Cat said nothing, only continued to stroke her arm soothingly.
“I’m so sorry,” she said, looking up. “I should not burden you with all this, especially now.”
“Jule, dearest,” said Cat softly. “I know how you feel, but you cannot allow these fears to stand in the way of your happiness. How do you think I felt last summer? I had no idea of how I might fit in with such a family as this one, or be a good wife to a man like Philip. I nearly let my doubts ruin everything, but I am so glad I did not. Of course, I do worry that I might not be as good a mother as Elinor deserves. I know so little about babies! But I shall learn, and—and even if I make mistakes, no one will love her more than I do.”
Remorse stung Juliana as tears begin to flow down her friend’s cheeks.
“Oh dear, I didn’t mean to make you cry, too!”
“It’s no matter. I’ve been prone to tears ever since I started increasing. Here, have a handkerchief. Jemima was clever enough to leave us several.”
Cat took two handkerchiefs from the pile on the table, and passed one to Juliana.
“Look at us!” she said, wiping her eyes. “What watering-pots we’ve become!”
“W-wouldn’t Pen laugh? We always thought she was the one who suffered from an excess of sensibility.” Cat blew her nose, then her expression became solemn. “Why are you still here?”
“What?”
“It is not that I do not enjoy having you here, but isn’t it time you returned to Marcus?”
“Do you think he will want me back, after all the accusations I made?”
“Will you ever find out, unless you go back to him?”
Juliana clutched Elinor to her chest. The sensation was strangely comforting, now that she had become used to it.
“Philip forgave me,” said Cat quietly. “You’ve done nothing so terrible as what I did last summer. I think you should go, Jule.”
She was out of the chair and halfway out the door when Cat’s voice checked her.
“Please, can I have my baby back?”
Chapter Seventeen
If the journey to Cumberland had seemed long, the trip back to Gloucestershire was endless. It seemed an age when Juliana finally alighted from her carriage in front of Redwyck Hall on a warm day, a little after noon.
“Welcome home, my lady,�
�� Critchley greeted her, a broad smile on his face. “His lordship has missed you.”
Encouraged, she asked where he was, and whether Mrs. Redwyck and Lucy had returned to the Hall yet.
“We expect Mrs. Redwyck and Miss Lucinda back in two days, ma’am,” he replied. “His lordship has gone fishing.”
“When do you expect him back?” she asked, hoping Critchley did not notice how her voice trembled with eagerness.
“He left not long ago, and will most likely be gone for several hours. I think he has not gone far. I expect you can find him on the grounds, near our own stream, my lady,” he replied, with an indulgent smile.
She was on the verge of running out after Marcus, but stopped as she saw her reflection in the mirror hanging across from the entrance. She was already nervous enough about her reunion with Marcus; she could not face him with a dusty face and a travel-stained dress.
She hurried upstairs, giving orders all the way. An hour later, she had bathed, and Polly was helping her into the same sprigged gown she had worn for that idyllic picnic when she and Marcus had begun their honeymoon. She rejected both the bonnet and matching spencer, arguing that the day was too warm. In truth, she could not bear to wait another minute.
She ran down the path along the stream, torn between eagerness and apprehension. Over the past few days she’d tried to imagine her reunion with Marcus. Would he be overjoyed, as Cat had predicted? Or had she destroyed his love with her hurtful accusations? Honor and duty would demand that he take her back into his home and even his bed. But would he still love her as he had during the precious weeks of their honeymoon?
She reached the meadow where they had had the picnic. He was there, just as she hoped. A rod and tackle lay beside him, but he was not fishing. Instead, he sat against one of the willow-trees, staring pensively down into the water. The day was so warm that he’d removed his jacket, and the sight of him in his shirtsleeves set her heart pounding even more painfully than before. He did not see her.
Legs trembling with anticipation, she walked towards him, the soft turf muffling her footsteps so that they could not be heard over the gurgling of the stream. Finally, she stood right next to him. His gaze shifted to her feet, then he lifted his head, his eyes slowly traveling up her body to her face. At first he looked stunned, as if he could not believe she was there, then his eyes blazed.
“Juliana,” he said, hoarsely, getting to his feet. “You’ve come back.”
Juliana exhaled, not realizing she had been holding her breath. Marcus dragged her into his arms and kissed her fiercely. She kissed him back with equal hunger, pressing herself against his chest as he molded her against him, half-lifting her off her feet until their hearts beat wildly against each other.
“You’ve come back,” he repeated, his voice husky. “I—I had almost given up hoping. How I’ve longed for you…”
“I’m sorry!” she said, her voice even more unsteady than his. “Can you forgive me for all the horrid things I said to you?”
“There’s nothing to forgive. You had every reason to doubt me. I—I only hoped you loved me enough to believe me when I said all I wanted was your happiness.”
“I do love you,” she said, tightening her hold on him. “I thought I left because I feared losing my independence, but it was more than that. I was afraid of how loving you would change my life, and how I would feel if you didn’t love me, or if something happened to you. Or to our children…”
“You are not afraid now, darling?”
“I am terrified,” she admitted, “but when I saw how happy Cat and Philip are, with their family and their new baby, I knew I had to come back. That loving you is worth the risk.”
He answered with another kiss, strong and deep and demanding. She kissed him back, moaning into the velvet warmth of his mouth as his hands roved down her back and waist. Then he lifted her off her feet again, and swiftly lowered her down onto the soft grass, coming down to lie beside her.
This time, it was no slow seduction. He pulled down her sleeves and bodice and kissed her breasts hungrily, while with the other hand he raised the skirt of her dress. She moaned as he touched her intimately, and found her more than ready. Feverishly, she tried to help him with his own buttons, then once again felt the sweet weight of his body over hers, and the remembered rapture of their joining.
They reached their peaks together. Marcus continued to hold Juliana tightly as she laid her head on his shoulder. She had never been so happy.
“Darling, what is wrong?”
She opened her eyes to look into her husband’s anxious hazel ones, and realized that tears were streaming down her cheeks.
“Nothing is wrong,” she said. “It is just that—I missed you so badly. It is so lovely to be with you again, to be home…”
He brushed away her tears and smiled.
“Home…” she murmured. “Do you know, I never felt as if I truly belonged anywhere before. I think that was at least part of my reason for wanting to travel.”
“I’m glad you have come to think of Redwyck Hall as your home,” he said. “But darling, I have every intention of keeping my promise to take you to Paris. In fact, now that I have engaged a proper steward, we could plan a more extended tour—including Rome and Venice, perhaps?”
“That sounds lovely, Marcus,” she said, and turned her head to trail little kisses along his jaw.
“I have some other news you might enjoy hearing.”
“What is it?”
“Last week, I was obliged to go to London, and I had the pleasure of dining with your grandfather.”
“How is he, and dear Mrs. Frisby?”
“Both of them are very well. While we were having dinner, your grandfather said he is having some doubts about the integrity of the man he has in Venice, dealing with the glass-makers there. I suggested that we might, in the course of our travels, stop by the office in Venice and discover if his suspicions are correct.”
“What did he say?”
“He thanked me, but said we were not to trouble ourselves and just enjoy our tour.”
Juliana rolled her eyes. “I see. Now that I have your protection, he has no objection to my traveling.”
“Perhaps. Does it matter?”
“No,” she said. “In truth, it is a great concession for Grandpapa not to object to our plans.”
She gazed back at Marcus. He, too, looked happier than she’d ever seen him, the lines of care and pain in his face softened by joy she had given him. She stretched to kiss his forehead, and cried out when he took advantage of her position to caress her breasts. He pushed her down onto her back once more, and continued to kiss and stroke her, this time with tantalizing slowness. She stared up at him, amazed by the strength of her desire, by the look of renewed passion in the depths of his eyes.
“S-so soon, Marcus?” she asked, faintly.
“I was too hasty before, dear wife,” he said, teasing her with his clever fingers. “This time we shall proceed more slowly.”
She sighed, and abandoned herself to the joy of his lovemaking. There were, indeed, many advantages to marrying a Redwyck.
THE END
Books by Elena Greene
If you enjoyed this book, please consider posting a review at your favorite online bookstore or book discussion site, so like-minded readers can find it, too.
Here are more books by Elena Greene for you to enjoy.
Traditional Regencies
Lord Langdon’s Kiss
The Wedding Wager (a sweet novella)
The Three Disgraces (3 books in 1)
The Incorrigible Lady Catherine (Three Disgraces Book 1)
The Redwyck Charm (Three Disgraces Book 2)
Saving Lord Verwood (Three Disgraces Book 3)
Historical Romances
Lady Dearing’s Masquerade
Fly with a Rogue
Lady Em’s Indiscretion (an erotic novella)
Excerpt from Lord Langdon’s Kiss
He k
issed her lightly, as if tasting her lips. Then, like a hungry man at a feast, he demanded entrance to her mouth and explored it with fiery thoroughness. She’d never imagined anything like this: the heat of his kiss, his strong arms around her, molding her against him so that she felt every breath. For an instant, she yielded to the overwhelming flood of sensations his kiss set loose inside her.
But it was now abundantly clear what he thought of her. All because she had so innocently welcomed his brother’s kiss!
She twisted her head away and struggled to free herself, afraid he might not release her.
An instant later, he did.
She backed away, legs trembling, and held up a warning hand. “Do not touch me again!”
He looked stunned.
“Did you think I would welcome your advances?” she asked.
He stared at her for a moment, then glanced back toward the doorway. All was silent now. His expression darkened.
“I thought you might,” he said. “I assure you I have no intention of repeating myself.”
Now his face was an impenetrable mask, pierced with icy blue eyes. He would not look so indifferent, had he truly desired her. So she was safe for the moment, but why had he kissed her?
With a sinking heart, she realized his motive. Idiot, for being too naïve to realize what he was doing. For being too surprised to rebuff him right away.
“You planned this!” she exclaimed. “You thought you could seduce me with your title and your wealth and cause me to betray myself in front of Darcy. That is why you were looking at the clock, isn’t it? He was supposed to meet you here, wasn’t he?”
He said nothing, but his guilty expression spoke volumes. It had been a trap.
“You were mistaken. I warn you, there is nothing you can do to prevent Darcy from marrying me, in time. You will be the loser if you persist in this contest!”