Chapter 10
CHEYENNE
Sam reached around my body to take the phone from my numb fingers.
“This is Sam Mackenzie, what’s going on?” I heard him sat from a distance.
I’m not sure what I expected when I answered, but hearing the news I did was not it. I couldn’t breathe, and my heart hurt. My brain wasn’t sure how to process the information that my brain had just heard.
“I understand. When will the plane arrive?” I heard Sam ask. “Alright, we will be meeting the plane that comes into Love field. Thank you.”
Sam gathered me into his arms and whispered, “You can let go now.”
I buried my face into his neck and cried for what felt like hours. He left me only for a while to make a few calls, but came back to me quickly. I never went back to sleep, I just stayed in his arms, wishing things were different.
∞
The group met outside at 0600 (Sam and the rest of the guys were on military time.) Janie was loaded up in Sam’s Suburban, and we were all standing around it making plans. Ember was riding on the back of Gabe’s bike because there wasn’t enough room in the vehicle, and the seat on Max’s bike was only made to seat one person. Ember didn’t put up much of a fight, but then again none of were capable of much. There just wasn’t anything left in us to spare emotionally. One of our own had died. Blaine was on the back of Elliot’s bike, and Jack and Max were riding alone. I was numb. My heart felt like I put it through the shredder. There was a pall over the group, and no one seemed to know exactly what to say. So we drove. We drove the two and a half hours to Ft. Worth to wait for the plane that was bringing him home to us. Tomorrow would be the funeral.
After two hours of driving we arrived at the airport and parked in short term parking. Blaine stayed in the car with Janie, while the rest of us made our way to the entrance. Sam led the way heading in a different direction from where the other passengers were heading. Sam went to talk to someone, I didn’t know who, about meeting the plane out on the tarmac. Normally they wouldn’t have let this happen the way it did, but Sam had some military clearance, and the airport was happy to help any way they could, given the circumstances.
Sam came out of the office that he had been in with a man that looked like he was a higher up with the airlines. Grabbing my hand on his way, they walked through a maze of hallways that led to a glass room. There we stood waiting for the plane to land.
I saw the plane approach the runway and land with my heart in my throat. The plane then taxied. Once the plane was stationery the official, who I learned was named Jason, led us out into the sunshine. The plane’s door was opened, and the steps were being lined up with the doorway of the plane. People began filing out one by one, heading into the direction of their baggage.
The final passenger who stepped out was the last person that I had thought that I would see today. I gasped, and then started running to him. By the time he got to the bottom of the steps, I had launched myself into his arms and hugged him for all I was worth.
“What are you doing here?” I asked him.
“I couldn’t make him come home alone, and the escort who is with him didn’t know him like I do. So I came home with him, to make sure he got here safely.” James said to me.
The military escort, Jason, had a solemn sad look on his face. According to James, this was his first military escort. The military always made sure that those KIA were escorted to their final resting places. Personal effects were given to family members. He made sure that each soldier wasn’t alone. If this situation weren’t so awful, I would have asked him more questions about the military escort process. I made a mental note to question Sam about it later.
“Cheyenne honey, James looks dead on his feet, why don’t you let him go.” I heard Sam say from behind me.
“Its ok, I like her where she is. I could use it right now. It is a good kind of hurt.” James said, not letting me go when I tried to pull away.
We stood like that for what seemed like hours, but then the luggage was being unloaded, and James came to and walked in the direction of the men who were loading suitcases onto the cart.
I stood in between Sam and James as we watched and waited. Finally the last piece of luggage was unloaded, and taken away. Another cart was pulled up beside the plane, but this one carried a flatbed trailer.
I couldn’t hold it in and longer, and let the tears fall, streaming down my face.
Four men made forward to get the last item out, but Sam, James, Elliott, Gabe, Jack and Max stopped them and moved forward to do it themselves. Gabe on one side, Sam on the other both reached in and pulled the box that held Dougie out.
Once more of the box was exposed, Elliott and Jack moved to take the middle, and Max and James got the end. They walked it carefully to the flat bed of the trailer and set it down with upmost care. The military escort stepped to the right, out of the way of the men unloading and saluted.
I glanced to my left when I saw movement, and noticed several baggage handlers, the pilots, and some stragglers from the plane standing in place. Those with hats had them covering their hearts in a sign of respect. Chills raced up my spine. Tears tracked down my cheeks uncontrolled. Dougie would have been so proud. He loved what he did, and each of these people here today would never forget him. It would follow them their entire lives, what they saw today. They would know that a hero came home, and was greatly loved by all.
Turning my attention back to the guys, I started walking forward when they did. We all followed the casket, and the military escort to what looked like an empty hanger. The guys loaded the box onto the platform that was already set up and waiting, then backed away as the escort started cutting the box away. It was wrapped in cardboard, tied with white strips to keep it secure. Once that was off, he removed the plastic that was covering the casket.
James was standing off by himself, and I pulled away from Sam, and walked to James, curling myself around his body, and watched, remembering how it felt when the guy on the phone had told me what had happened.
“Ma’am, I am sorry to bother you so late, but this is Captain Lance Arnette with the United States Army. Your brother was on a mission and was wounded. As of right now we are not sure how serious his injuries are. He is on a military flight…..” was all I heard before my mind shut down.
I heard Sam talking to the man, but my heart was breaking. God please let him live, please let him live. I repeated over and over again.
James tensed up and I forced my attention back to the casket. You could see the beautiful mahogany wood that was polished perfectly.
The military escort, who I learned was a PFC named Jacob Satterwhite, laid the folded flag out on top of the coffin and unfolded it laying it flat over the top of the coffin, while tucking it in and doing something that made the sides stay tucked up.
I looked around at the guys, and everyone’s eyes looked haunted.
Once the casket had the flag draped over it, a waiting hearse was backed up and the men loaded it into the back.
The funeral director came over and spoke with us to let us know where he would be taking the body.
“If you don’t mind waiting, we would like to follow you. The escort will ride with you, and we will be behind.” Sam said to him.
The man nodded and went to his hearse as we walked to our vehicles.
We did some luggage repositioning, strapping some down to the back of the bikes with bungee cords before we finally had enough room for James to get in. I got up front with Sam, and James sat in back with Janie who was asleep in her car seat with Cheetos smears all over her face. We had to rearrange luggage and shove some up front with me to get a seat open for him to sit comfortably.
James buckled his seat belt, then turned and ran his hand down Janie’s face, leaned over and kissed her nose. He smelled her hair for a couple seconds, then leaned back into his seat, but held her hand, closing his eyes tightly.
I turned around then, letting him have a little priv
acy.
We headed to a back road where we saw the hearse exit from a back entrance, and followed him all the way to the funeral home. I’m sure we looked a sight, following behind the hearse: a large black Suburban with big tires, and three motorcycles, one flying an American flag behind it. Cars flashed their lights, and never passed the entire way to the funeral home.
Arriving at the funeral home, the hearse parked under an awning in the back of the building, got out, opened the back door to the funeral home, then came back and opened the back hatch of the suburban. The guys yet again moved the body, placing him on a platform in the biggest room they had, according to the director.
I walked back outside to give the guys time by themselves and to make sure I was there with Janie when she woke.
SAM
The funeral director lifted the casket lids after James made the request.
There Dougie sat, in his dress uniform. The uniform itself was immaculate. Most people don’t know that a brand new uniform is made for each deceased soldier. Some people might wonder why bother when it will never see the light of day. However the uniform is a symbol. Each soldier is proud to be in their uniforms. There is a certain type of man that can wear the uniform, and to die for your country makes you a hero, and heroes deserve the best. The Gold Bar on his left breast gleamed. He was so proud when he made Second Lieutenant. He always said a man like him was lucky to be where he was today. The beret on his head was perfectly settled, and his shoes shined brightly.
He looked like he was sleeping. My heart hurt, and it felt hard to breathe. I had lost five good men, and it never got any easier. This one hurt the most, because it made me wonder. If I had been there, would this have happened?
“Can you tell us what happened?” I asked James.
He took a deep breath, and then began.
“We were black for only 17 hours when it all TARFU. It was Justin. I saw him with my own eyes. He looked me in the eyes, smiled at me, and waved. Knew we were there.” He took another shaky breath, let it out slowly, and then started again, “We were dropped off by a helo, scouted for hours before we found the right spot. Dougie was looking through the night vision binoculars and I was looking through my scope when I saw our target. Dougie gave me the specs, and I took the shot. The intel we received said that there were no hostiles in residence. Unfortunately they were wrong, and a shit ton of people stormed out. They shot everywhere in all directions. We were retreating when he was shot in the upper right chest right under his collar bone. It was a through and through, didn’t look too bad. He said it hurt like a mother, but he was ok to move. We both took off to the rendezvous and had just arrived when more shots rang out. Dougie was collapsed, so I picked him up and carried him to the waiting helo, I took one to the left leg and one to the right arm before I got him there. As we cleared the trees I laid out some shots towards the area that the shots came from earlier when I saw him. He was sitting in an armored jeep with the inside lights on so I could see him, fucking waving at me. I started some return fire towards him when the helo banked hard right and I lost sight of him.”
I grabbed the back of his neck, and made him look in my eyes when I told him, “There was nothing you could do, James. Everything you did was right.”
“He gave me a note. For when Kayla gets old enough to understand. Right before he went, he told me it was in his right front pocket.” James said shakily.
The guys had remained quiet up until now, letting James and me talk, but at that there were some muttered curses. I think all soldiers prepared for the worst. They didn’t want to be caught unprepared, just in case.
I looked at them all, and then said, “Alright guys, we need to get to the hotel and get settled. We haven’t had much sleep. So let’s get a little shut eye. The funeral is at 9:45 tomorrow morning. Who wants first shift?”
“I want to do it.” Gabe said. He took up sentry by the door as the rest of us left through the way we came.
When we got outside, the first thing I saw was Cheyenne playing tag in the parking lot with Janie. Janie would run up to Cheyenne, and then take off running in the opposite direction, while Cheyenne pretended to not be able to catch her. Ember looked on, while sitting on a stone bench under the awning, Blaine beside her.
I glanced over to James to see that he had a sad smile on his face.
Suddenly a piercing shriek came from Janie when she fell and scraped her knee. She was wailing “Daddy” over and over again. James took off like he wasn’t hurt, and got to her even before Cheyenne did. He scooped her up and whispered into her hair while Janie buried her head into his neck. It wasn’t long before Janie realized she actually had her daddy and started crying for a different reason, giving him slobbery snot kisses in the process.
CHEYENNE
Once again tears were pouring down my face when Janie realized that James had her. She was so very excited, squirming and bouncing up and down. James held on like his life depended on it, and he was never letting go.
Sam’s arm circled my waist, and we all watched James and Janie for a long while. When Janie finally stopped squealing, James turned to us and asked if we were ready to go, so we nodded and headed to the vehicles. James strapped Janie into her car seat while I hopped into the back to let James have the front. Motorcycles roared behind us as we made our way out of the parking lot.
We got to the hotel, and the men went inside to arrange rooms for a few days while I stayed in the car with Janie. Ember and Blaine stayed on their prospective bikes.
Janie screaming and crying because James had left her, and I was trying to talk to her to get her to calm down when there was a tap on the door. I turned in my seat to see Dougie’s mom holding a sleeping little girl.
I threw open my door and had her in my arms before she even had a chance to back away. As soon as I got my arms around her she started crying, which in turn started me to crying. Kayla lay asleep between us, blissfully unaware to what was going on.
I had only met Mrs. Nash a few times, but each of those times we bonded because of her love of Roller Derby. We were both talking about what we were interested in when the roller derby came up. I started in with the Roller Derby scene when I was fourteen. Each Tuesday and Thursday night we would practice, and then on Saturday nights the bought was held.
I roped Ember into it, and we have competed with the Bombers every season since. One weekend while Dougie was visiting, Mrs. Nash drove down with Kayla, and they decided to go watch one of our meets. Mrs. Nash fell in love with it, and even came one other time without Dougie being there. She was always so lovely and full of life. She did come off as sad at times, but Dougie explained that she missed her husband. They had been together for forty five years when Mr. Nash had died of a heart attack.
“How are you doing Mrs. Nash?” I whisper into her ear.
Her breath hitches, and she says “Not so good. I always knew this was a possibility. I just never thought it would happen to him. My heart feels empty. A parent shouldn’t outlive a child.”
By the time she finished telling me this she was outright crying. Kayla woke, and looked so sweet and sleepy. I reached for her and gave her a big hug and a sloppy kiss on the cheek. She giggled and said “Stop it!”
“Would you like to play with Janie for a little bit? She sure has missed you!” I asked her, while opening up the back door where Janie was, and set Kayla on the seat. The two girls started talking in the baby language like they understood perfectly what the other was saying. I closed the door and turned back to Mrs. Nash.
“I’m so sorry, Mrs. Nash. I don’t even know what to say. I loved Dougie too, and I am sure it is no comparison to what you have to be feeling right now. Do you have a room here?” I asked her.
“Yes, it’s on the fourth floor. I’m just so tired. I haven’t slept since the soldier came to the door to tell me. I need to talk to Sam and James also. Could you tell them to come see me?” she asked.
“Of course! I’ll send him up there as soon as w
e get checked in.” I said to her.
“Yes, that is good. My room number is 407.” She said while reaching for the door handle to get Kayla.
“Would you like us to keep her for a little while? I’ll watch her while you get some rest. I’ll bring her back later this evening.” I said to her.
“That would be good. I need a little break down time. I haven’t been able to get away from her for long. She senses that something wrong. I don’t know what to tell her.” She answered.
“Ok. If you want to go ahead, I’ll send them to you when they get a chance.” I replied.
She nodded her head, and shuffled around the side of the building disappearing out of sight a while later. She looked defeated. My heart hurt even more now that I had seen her. Dougie always said she had died a little inside after Mr. Nash passed. And now I am sure if it wasn’t for Kayla, she would have been an empty shell.
Ember and Blaine had come over as soon as Mrs. Nash left, to watch the girls play together in the back seat. This was a bittersweet feeling, seeing them laughing and happy when the world had just lost a wonderful man.
Sam came out a short while later with two key cards. One for each of us. The guys followed him out, talking in a low tone that I couldn’t make out. He came up between Blaine and I, wrapping his arm around my waist, staring in the Suburban’s window watching the two girls play.
“What’s going on?” Sam asked quietly.
“Mrs. Nash came by with Kayla a little while ago. She wants James and you to come see her when you get a chance.” I said. “I’ll watch the girls while y’all go.”
James came up to me and wrapped his arms around me. I sank into him, breathing him in, being thankful that he was still alive. I’d been close to losing him.
James kissed the top of my head, then opened the car door and got Janie out of her seat and set her down on the concrete beside the Suburban. He then reached for Kayla and did the same with her. The little girls ran around at our feet and laughed and played. I grabbed both of their hands when the luggage was all loaded onto the luggage rack and headed towards the elevators.
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