by Claire Raye
I’m far more emotional than I expect. This doesn’t happen to me, but paired with my dad’s death and what he said about me, and now this sudden closeness, I find myself unable to choke it back down.
“Sienna, I’m sorry for what I said. I didn’t mean it. I promise,” he begs, an air of desperation in his tone. “I said it because…” He swallows hard and I watch his throat move, his tongue slipping out to wet his lips, but he doesn’t finish his thought, just adding, “I hurt you at a time when you were already hurting and I’m so sorry.”
His hand tangles in my hair, his other hand slipping around my neck and for a second I think he’s going to lean in and kiss me. My heartbeat ratchets up in my chest and the sound of my breathing fills the car, hard and labored. I wet my lips, waiting for him to finally do what I’ve wanted to do for years, but instead, he rests his forehead against mine. His eyes fall closed and he breathes softly, each breath feathering my lips, making me want him even more.
“Thank you,” I manage to mutter while everything inside me is screaming so loud it feels like it will rip through my skin.
We sit suspended in a weightlessness that consumes us, the closeness of our bodies, the feel of our breathing, we take it all in, but then he pulls away. Leaving me bereft and confused, he shifts the truck into drive and pulls back out onto the road and neither of us mentions the moment that just passed between us.
Another hour floats by and Reid flips on the radio, letting it scan for stations and stopping it on the first thing it comes across. Some trendy pop song screeches through the speakers and I cringe a little.
“You can’t tell me you like this?” I say, rolling my eyes when he nods his head. “Reid, you are so basic.”
“This coming from the girl who wears a bra to a keg party and drinks Starbucks,” Reid jokes, hitting me with an amused smile. “What would you suggest?” he asks, throwing an open hand in the direction of the radio.
I pull my phone from my purse and plug it in, scrolling through to find a song and I smile when I come across the perfect one.
Bush’s “Glycerine” begins to play through the speakers and when Gavin Rossdale’s voice melodically begins to sing I almost moan out loud.
“So much better,” I groan, my head falling back making Reid laugh out loud.
“What is this?” he asks, his lips curling up a little as he looks over at me.
“You can’t be fucking serious.” Appalled at Reid’s lack of respect for nineties grunge, I shake my head. “It’s Bush and this man’s voice is like lyrical sex.” I moan out loud and grab my boobs, my mouth dropping open, my eyes falling closed.
I wait for a witty comeback from Reid, but when I open my eyes, his cheeks are flushed a little and he’s focusing on the road as if it’s suddenly going to disappear if he looks away.
What the hell is with him?
I don’t get a chance to ask, because in that second my phone chimes out, Ruby’s name dropping down from the top of the screen and without thinking about it, I push the button and Reid’s truck is reading the message out loud.
“Ruby said,” the truck starts in the robotic voice. “I saw Justin just a little while ago and he was all over this trashy girl. Making out and shit. Did something happen—” I immediately yank my phone from the cord, cutting the message off before it can be fully read.
I feel the car heat up and I’m suddenly sweating, my face red and hot. I hate that Reid was proven right and my immediate thought is to make excuses, to play it off like I don’t care when inside I’m fucking hurt. I wanted to believe he wasn’t that kind of guy, but if I’m being honest, aren’t they almost always. I saw it in his eyes when he walked out of my house the other day, but I felt it long before then. I was his way to get back at Reid.
“You okay?” Reid asks, but there’s no insinuation in his tone, no gloating.
“Just a dumb girl here.”
“Bullshit, Sie. Don’t say that about yourself. You’re the baddest fucking girl I know. You’re still tolerating me. That’s more than I can say for any girl I’ve met.”
“I thought that was your thing though. Not to hang onto them too long.”
He shrugs, looking over at me when he says, “You’re the only one worth holding onto.”
And my heart falls into my stomach.
“You should text him and call him out on his shit, Sie,” he says, not waiting for me to acknowledge what he’s just said. “Or better yet just fucking call him and give him a piece of your mind the way you would me.”
I laugh, but realizing he has a point, I press Justin’s name, letting it ring as I switch it over to speakerphone. But of course he doesn’t answer and I hang up when his voicemail starts. He’s ghosting me and that shouldn’t be a shock.
“That chicken-shit asshole,” Reid mutters and it makes me smile, a small laugh escaping my mouth. “Text him now.”
“It feels like you’re more angry about his dickhead ways than I am,” I tell Reid, teasing him a little.
“It’s bullshit and he knows it. That prick…” Reid doesn’t finish his thought and even though I know what he was going to say, I don’t push it any further.
But I do text Justin because for my own personal knowledge, I need him to know he’s exactly what I hoped he wouldn’t be,
Me: Wow…and you like to bag on Reid. Obviously whatever this was between us is over.
Oddly he responds almost instantly and it’s like he’s looking to shame me, like he’s looking to make me feel guilty over how he treats women.
Justin: There was never anything between us because you’re a useless bitch.
I gasp out loud and then start to laugh when I read his message. Glad I dodged that bullet. I flash my phone screen over to Reid and I watch his jaw tighten almost immediately.
“I’m going to kick his fucking ass when we get back to Hawthorn,” Reid bites out, his response exactly what I thought it would be, but we both know we won’t see Justin again. He’ll disappear because he knows he’s a slimy jerk.
“How’d you know Justin was a dick?” I ask, letting the text conversation between Justin and me go because it really isn’t worth my time to argue with him.
“He’s so fucking typical and he was all jilted because I could just look at a girl and she’d beg me to take her home.”
“Right now, it’s you who sounds like the dick, just an FYI,” I tell him, wrinkling up my nose in disgust.
“Yeah, but here’s the difference, I don’t lead those girls on. I’m clear from the start that I’m not interested in anything more than what will go down that evening.” He tugs a hand through his hair, but never looks over at me and I wonder sometimes if he isn’t embarrassed by his behavior. “Guys like Justin are the worst. He makes you think he’s the perfect dream, but really he’s your worst nightmare.”
“And what are you?” I ask, baiting him, but my voice takes on a strange flirting quality that I’ve never used with Reid.
“Sienna, I’m a dream come true.”
Chapter Fourteen
Reid
She doesn’t say anything to my comment and when I glance over, she’s staring at me, her eyes wide and her lips slightly parted in a way that looks so fucking sexy. If I wasn’t driving, I’d lean over and kiss her. Instead, I reach over and run my finger down her nose, before tapping gently under her chin to close her mouth. She’s fucking adorable when she’s shocked, especially when it’s because of me. And it’s enough that I can momentarily forget how much I want to punch Justin’s face in right now. Fucking asshole.
“Anyway, he’s bad news,” I continue, looking back at the road. “That’s why I wanted you to stay away from him.”
Sienna clears her throat and from the corner of my eye I see her shift in her seat, so she’s fully facing me now. “Do you…um, do you think…” she pauses, as though she isn’t sure she wants to ask the question.
Shooting her a quick glance, I take a risk and
say, “Do I think he went after you to get back at me?”
Sienna shrugs and nods at the same time. “Yeah,” she whispers and I’m glad she seems to realize I didn’t say that to piss her off.
I take a deep breath before I answer, knowing it’s gonna hurt no matter how I say it. “Yeah, Sie, I do,” I finally say. “I’m sorry.”
Sienna raises an eyebrow. “Wow, twice in one day, that’s gotta be some sort of record doesn’t it?”
“What?”
She smirks a little, pursing her lips at me as though she can’t believe I don’t know what she’s talking about. “Two apologies,” she says, a sarcastic tone to her words. “From you.”
I chuckle. “Whatever, let’s just say I reserve my apologies for people who deserve them.”
Her smirk disappears at my words, but she doesn’t respond, instead changing the subject as she asks, “So why did you sleep with Justin’s girlfriend then? This has obviously been some long-standing vendetta of his.”
I burst out laughing. “I’m not sure it’s that dramatic,” I say, reaching over to squeeze her knee, trying to ignore the way her warm skin feels under my touch. She’s wearing these tiny shorts that make her ass and legs looking fucking amazing and I haven’t been able to stop looking at them all morning. “But if you really want to know, I actually didn’t even realize she was his girlfriend. She told me they’d broken up.”
“What?” Sienna asks and I can hear the shock in her voice. “Are you serious?”
“Yeah, of course I am,” I scoff. “I don’t do shit like that.”
Sienna is silent for long enough that I eventually have to look over just to try and get a read on what she’s thinking. She’s staring at me, a look on her face that I can’t decipher. “What?”
She shrugs. “I don’t know. That kinda surprises me, that’s all.”
I shove a hand through my hair, my other arm resting on the window as I hold the wheel. “Contrary to popular opinion, Sie, I’m not a total asshole, okay? I don’t fuck with other guys’ girls.”
“Would you cheat on your own girlfriend?” she asks, and when I glance over quickly to make sure I heard her properly, she raises a brow in question before shaking her head and saying, “Actually, have you even had a girlfriend?”
I don’t know why she asks me that. She knows I haven’t. She’s watched me have fun with girls, hang out with girls and she sure as hell knows I’ve fucked girls. But it’s not like I’ve ever brought a girl or a girlfriend into our thing or whatever the hell we are.
“Reid,” she prompts.
I shrug. “No, not really.”
“But would you cheat?” she asks, arms crossed over her chest, that smirk back on her face.
I swallow hard, a weird nervousness curling in my gut. “No,” I spit out. “Of course not.”
“Uh huh,” she says, and I can tell she doesn’t believe me. “So why don’t you get yourself a girlfriend?”
I shake my head, the weird nervousness now turning into frustration. “Maybe,” I say, pegging her with a hard stare, “I haven’t hooked up with the right girl yet,” I add before turning my gaze back to the road.
Silence surrounds us. Sienna doesn’t say anything about my answer and I don’t dare look at her. From the corner of my eye though, I see her grab the cord for her phone and plug it back in, before she scrolls through and selects another song to put on.
Without saying a word to me, she throws her phone onto the dash as the sound of drums, followed by a guitar, cuts through the silence of the car. I wait a few seconds to see if I can work out what song she’s chosen this time, but give up, turning to look at her.
Sienna laughs. “Aerosmith,” she says, propping her feet up on the dash. “Technically not from the nineties, but almost.”
I nod, turning back to the road as I listen to the song, wondering where the hell she got her love of this kind of music from? When the chorus kicks in though, I can’t help but laugh, turning to her as I ask, “Seriously?”
“What?” she asks, but I can tell she’s trying not to smile.
“Tell me what it takes to let you go,” I half sing to her. “Tell me how the pain’s supposed to go. What is this? Some break up song?”
She laughs now, shaking her head. “It’s a cool song, Reid,” she says. “But yeah, I guess it also seemed appropriate.”
Without thinking, I reach over and grab Sienna’s hand from where it rests on her knee. Slipping my fingers through hers, I bring our joined hands to my chest, holding them there. “You shouldn’t waste your time broken hearted over Justin, Sie,” I tell her, my words quiet. “He’s a fucking dick and he isn’t worth your time or your heart. You deserve so much better than him.”
I feel the gentle squeeze of her hand in mine and when I glance over, she’s staring at me again, a half smile on her face. I smile back before letting go of her hand, trying to ignore the way my heart flips in my chest at that look.
And wishing to fuck I could be what she deserves.
We’ve been driving for a couple of hours by the time I finally see the turn off. It’s been good though, Sienna and I managing to have several normal conversations, all while she continues to educate me on her weirdly outdated music preferences.
So far, I’m getting a pretty good idea that she loves grunge music and guitar laden power ballads. I’ve been giving her a steady stream of shit about it too, but it’s been good and more than anything I’ve loved the fact that she’s smiling again, seemingly forgetting about that dickhead Justin and his motives for wanting to be with her.
“Where are we going?” she asks, as I indicate to get off the highway.
I grin, lifting my brows as I look over at her. “Somewhere cool.”
Sienna looks out the window, her eyes taking in the sign for Pikes Peak and the Summit House some nineteen miles away. “Do we have time?” she asks, turning back to me.
I chuckle. “Coming from the girl who’s in no rush to get back home?” I tease. Sienna shrugs, a light blush on her cheeks. “We have time, Sie,” I tell her. “From what I hear it’s pretty fucking awesome up there,” I add. “And,” I pause for dramatic effect, “they even sell donuts at the top.”
“What?” she asks, as though she isn’t sure if I’m serious or teasing her.
“Yep,” I reply, smiling. “Donuts.”
The road up to the top is long and winding, with loads of places to pull off to the side and take in the view. I stop at one of them, a bend on the road giving way to a huge rocky outcrop overlooking the valley below.
“Come on,” I tell her, switching off the car as I reach for my sunglasses on the dash.
Sienna grabs her phone and follows me out as I walk over toward the rocks. Glancing back, I realize she’s wearing flip flops. “You got other shoes with you?” I ask.
“Uh huh,” she murmurs, glancing down at her feet.
I chuckle, turning around and heading back to the car. “Put them on,” I tell her, unlocking it.
Sienna shoots me a glance before she leans into the back seat to grab her bag. My mouth goes dry at the sight of her ass in those tiny fucking shorts now sticking out of the back of my truck. She makes it worse when she continues to rummage through her shit, almost as though she knows I’m enjoying the view and wants to tease me with it for a little longer.
“Tick tock, Sie,” I tell her.
“Alright, Mr. Impatient,” she says, finally pulling out a pair of sneakers. “For the record, this was your idea.”
I smirk at her. “Whatever. You’ll be thanking me for it when we get there.”
Sienna pokes her tongue out at me and it takes every fucking ounce of self-control I have not to haul her against me and suck that tongue into my mouth. Instead, I jam my hands in the back pockets of my jeans as she sits in the back seat and changes her shoes.
“Okay, ready,” she says, jumping out of the truck.
Chuckling, I make a point of looking
at my watch before dramatically saying, “Finally!”
Sienna punches my arm and in response, I sling it around her shoulders, not missing the way she tenses a little. Or the way she doesn’t pull away this time.
We walk over to the large rocky outcrop and I drop my arm to grab her hand in mine as I lead a path out to the edge.
“How far are we going?” she asks, glancing around at the view in front of us.
“All the way?” I playfully suggest, wiggling my eyebrows at her as I glance over my shoulder.
She smirks at me and I squeeze her fingers, tugging on her hand to pull her closer. When we reach the giant boulders at the edge, I let go so I can climb up onto it, my shoes occasionally slipping on the loose gravel.
“Careful,” Sienna murmurs behind me.
I chuckle. “Worried about me?” I tease, finally getting up and taking a seat. I reach down a hand to help her up, smirking when she rolls her eyes but still accepts it.
“No,” she says, taking a seat beside me. “I just don’t want to do this entire drive by myself.”
I burst out laughing, slipping my arm around her shoulder again and pulling her close. “Ah, Sie, don’t pretend you aren’t enjoying my company,” I tease, bumping my shoulder against hers. “You can admit you’ve missed it. I promise I won’t give you too much shit for it.”
I look down at her in time to catch the eye roll. But she’s smiling and I watch as she takes in the view we’ve come up here for. “It’s pretty beautiful,” she whispers.
“Yeah,” I whisper, my eyes still on her. “It is.”
As we sit in silence, taking it all in, my phone suddenly chimes out with a text. I pull it from my pocket, shaking my head when I see the message.
Matt: are you seriously on a road trip with Sienna Parker?
Fuck me, how the hell did he find out? I type out a quick response to him, the bubbles immediately popping up to signal he’s replying.