Joshua could hardly believe his ears. Before the other man should change his mind, he leapt out of the car to shake him by the hand. ‘Done! And many thanks. You won’t regret it. You know it’s the right thing to do.’
Before they parted, Joshua asked, ‘What made you change your mind?’
Edward took a moment to reflect and his eyes began to smart. ‘You were right. My father would never have approved of turning Tom out of his home, anymore than he was proud of me, when I almost cost him everything he had worked for.’ His voice dropped to a whisper. ‘I know my weakness cost him his life, and I will have to live with that.’
Joshua saw his pain and he was humbled. ‘No, Edward,’ he spoke softly. ‘Your father would probably have had that heart attack anyway. All those long years of working day and night when you were a boy; it was bound to take its toll. Don’t punish yourself for something that was beyond your control.’
Edward looked up, his eyes bright with tears. ‘Thank you,’ he murmured. ‘You can’t know what those few words of kindness mean to me.’
‘I mean it. Life is hard enough without taking on more blame than you have a right to.’
Edward smiled, and when the tears threatened to spill, he quickly turned on his heel and strode away. ‘Let Tom know the eviction notice is cancelled,’ he called over his shoulder. ‘I’ll be in touch!’
As he drove away, Joshua felt triumphant. He had helped both Tom and Edward Baxter.
‘You think a man is rock solid and ice cold ruthless,’ he murmured to himself, ‘but underneath, we all have our ghosts to deal with.’
His thoughts fled back to the first year he and Tricia were married. Almost four months later the son she was carrying, was sadly lost to them.
It was a heart-breaking time.
Over the years they talked about it often between themselves, but never once had they discussed it with anyone else, not even family.
Such a deeply sad experience was best shared only by those who suffered it.
A few days later, Tom received a letter from Edward Baxter’s legal representative.
Dear Mr Arnold,
I have had instructions from Edward Baxter, of Baxter Hall, owner of the cottage you inhabit and the land surrounding it. I am to inform you that you will not be evicted from your home. However, you will be required to accept the following men to work under your personal and expert guidance for an unspecified period of time, in order to keep good the said land and buildings owned by the above Edward Baxter, and previously maintained by yourself and your sons.
Here enclosed is a form of acceptance to these conditions. If you are in agreement, please sign and return the form and we will be in touch with regard to the workmen, who will report to you for instructions concerning what work is required of them.
According to my instructions, once you are able to undertake the necessary work unaided, the men employed by Edward Baxter, will of course no longer be required.
Mr Edward Baxter will be calling on you at some time in the near future, in order to clarify matters, and answer any queries you may have.
Yours sincerely,
J.C. Clarence
As always, straight after breakfast, Tom had collected the letter from the postbox that was situated at the bottom of the garden path.
Nancy was busy packing her delicate china, and feeling totally lost as she tried to envisage a life away from this delightful home where they had been so happy for all these years.
‘I really don’t know how we’ll ever cope…’ she told Tom as he wandered in. ‘I’ve never lived in lodgings before. The very idea of it makes me feel ill…’
Distraught, she flopped into the armchair and began to cry. ‘I’m sorry, Tom…’ she started. ‘I can’t even think about it…’
‘Now, now, Nancy…don’t upset yourself love…’ He had torn open the letter and was on his way to console her, when suddenly he screeched out, ‘OH MY GOD! NANCY!’ He was laughing and crying all at the same time. ‘We’re not being thrown out after all!’
Now it was his turn to be tearful, but this time they were tears of joy. ‘We can stay here! Oh, Nancy, did you hear what I said! we can stay!’
Flinging his arms round her, he read the letter to her, and afterwards the two of them danced across the kitchen floor. They laughed and hugged, and when the initial excitement was spent, Nancy wiped the tears from her eyes.
‘I can’t believe it,’ she said brokenly. ‘Read it to me again, Tom love! Just to be sure we’re not dreaming!’
And so he read it, and for a long moment they were silent, holding each other and thinking how the good Lord had smiled down on them. And Nancy had a thought. ‘Tom?’
‘Yes, my love?’ He still could not stop smiling.
‘If I told you I suspect Alice had something to do with this, would you be angry?’
At first he stared at her in astonishment. ‘Alice.’ There was hostility in his voice. ‘Why the devil would you think she had something to do with it?’
‘Alice Arnold! Whether we like it or not, Alice is still our daughter-in-law.’
Tom chose to ignore her very proper reminder. ‘As far as I’m concerned,’ he declared angrily, ‘that young woman has devastated our family, and you should remember that! As for you thinking she may have had something to do with us staying on here, I can not imagine!’
‘I can’t be certain, but when you were out walking the other day, she came to see me,’ Nancy confessed.
Tom’s features stiffened. ‘She was here? And you never thought to tell me!’
‘I didn’t tell you because I knew you would react like you’re reacting now…with a sour face and a sharp tongue, and anyway she was here for just a few minutes.’
Now Tom was on his feet, staring down on her with a distinctly disapproving expression. ‘I hope you didn’t let her in!’
‘I did, yes, and she opened her heart to me. Look, Tom…I know our family has been devastated but it’s wrong to blame Alice altogether. After all, Joe could easily have turned her away, but he didn’t.’
‘No! Because she had him in her claws, that’s why!’
‘No, Tom. And I know you’ve always had your suspicions that Joe was attracted to Alice on the first day Frank brought her home.’
Tom was shocked. ‘Whatever makes you say that?’
‘Because I know you better than you think, and because I saw how Joe looked at her, like he’d known her all his life. I knew that was why he went away, and so did you.’
Tom could not deny it, but he was adamant. ‘I don’t want her in this house ever again! And as for her having something to do with us staying here, that is just ridiculous.’
‘Maybe not so ridiculous, Tom,’ Nancy explained. ‘She came here because she was distraught about Joe, and all the things that have happened. She said she was sorry about her part in it, and that in a way she didn’t blame Frank, because she and Joe had been wrong to do what they did. She was here to seek our forgiveness, Tom.’
‘Well, she won’t get it…not from me anyway. Never from me!’
‘Think what you’re saying, Tom,’ Nancy urged. ‘Think what it must have taken for her to forgive Frank. And I’ll tell you now, whatever provocation he may have had, Frank was wicked to do what he did to Joe and to Alice. Yes, she did wrong, and so did Joe. But to my mind, Frank did much worse. And what about what he did to you? His own father!’
This was the first time she had disclosed her true feelings, and now she wanted Tom to realise how strongly she felt at what their son had done to this young woman.
‘Don’t you try and tell me he was justified, because to my mind what he did was unforgiveable. He hurt her bad, Tom, and tell me this, how would you have felt if that had been your own daughter? Frank deliberately tied her down and tortured her. He ripped out her hair and put her through hell! And I tell you now Tom…though I want him safe, I do not forgive him what he did. I don’t know if I ever can!’
Tom had never
seen his beloved wife so wound up before, and it shook him to his roots. ‘Oh, I can see it all now! I can see she’s got to you…just like she got to our two boys.’
‘No, Tom! You won’t let yourself look at the wider picture, will you? Alice is just a girl, Tom, a frightened, haunted girl. She looks ill, Frank, and she has nightmares, and she said if there was any way she could help us stay here in our home, she would move Heaven and earth…’
‘Hmm! Anybody can say anything if they’re looking to be forgiven! It means nothing. D’you hear me, Nancy! What Alice says means absolutely nothing! Not to me!’
Besides being angry at her for letting Alice in, his pride was dented. ‘The reason we’re staying here is because I know more about this land than any other man will learn in a lifetime, apart from the man who shaped it! They need me, Nancy. That’s why we’re being allowed to stay, and for no other reason that that!’
Nancy stood up. ‘There’s something else.’
‘Oh, so now what?’ His patience was at an end.
‘Alice had seriously considered having an abortion.’
‘Why does that not surprise me?’
‘She decided against it though.’
‘Well, at least she has the decency not to end a life before it’s begun. No doubt she’ll give the child to some stranger after it’s born.’
‘Does that worry you, Tom?’
‘No! Why should it? As far as I’m concerned, it’ll be a little bastard…best given away to somebody else.’
Nancy was shocked. ‘May the Lord forgive you, Tom Arnold.’
‘There is nothing to forgive. I suppose the next thing you’ll be saying is that she’s carrying our grandchild, and we should be looking forward to it?’
‘Yes! Something like that.’ Nancy smiled. ‘Only it won’t just be our grandchild. Alice is carrying our grandchildren. She’s having twins, Tom, and they’re our flesh and blood. So, don’t you think it’s time for a little forgiveness?’
Reeling from the shock, Tom would not give an inch. ‘To hell with her and to hell with them! I don’t want her offspring! I want our sons back! I want us to be the family we were before she came along. You need to remember, Nancy…they won’t just be our flesh and blood…they’ll be hers too. And I for one want nothing whatsoever to do with them!’
In a state of rage and utter confusion, he stormed off.
When Nancy called after him, he quickened his steps, and sought refuge in the barn.
Huddled on a hay bale in the corner, Tom’s gaze was drawn to the bird cage swinging in the rush of air that whistled through the cracks in the wall.
Images rushed through his mind; of his son Frank and the wickedness that was undoubtedly rooted in him. How did it happen, that a son of his should harbour such evil?
He watched a while longer, his painful thoughts creating an avalanche of images, as the cage swung backwards and forwards, creaking a tune against the silence.
In his mind he saw Joe, trussed up in that hospital bed, damaged and broken, maybe for the rest of his young life.
He also remembered Alice, made almost unrecognisable by what Frank had done to her.
And the wild bird, kept safe in that bird cage, while being tenderly nursed back to its amazing beauty in Joe’s loving care.
The enormity of Frank’s badness was a terrifying thing. So much pain, so much hatred.
Try as he might, Tom could not take his eyes off the bird cage, swinging backwards and forwards, backwards and forwards; the rhythmic creaking seeming like the cries of a creature in agony.
‘What in God’s name possessed you, Frank?’ he murmured softly. ‘How could you hurt a helpless little bird like that?’
He heard Nancy’s voice in his head. ‘She’s just a girl, Tom…a frightened, haunted girl.’
Wasn’t it odd, he mused, how he could feel so warm and comfortable in this draughty old barn, especially when these very walls had witnessed such badness.
And especially as this very barn was the place where it all began.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
ALICE STOOD WITH the back door open, watching as the snow fell in droves, just as it had done all day long.
Now, in the late evening, everything was covered in white. Along the back footpath some little creature had picked its way up to the back door and back down again, creating a perfectly formed ladder right down to the end of the footpath, where it disappeared into the undergrowth.
Tricia came rushing in from the front hallway. ‘Good grief, child!’ She hurried to Alice’s side. ‘Whatever are you doing, standing there in your nightgown? Come away, before you catch your death of cold!’
In no time, she had the door closed and was leading Alice back to the kitchen table. ‘Look at you!’ Pointing to Alice’s swollen stomach, she tutted. ‘Only weeks to go before you give birth and there you are standing at the open door on a freezing cold January evening, trying to get pneumonia!’
Placing Alice carefully but firmly into the chair, she said, ‘Sit there and do as you’re told, young lady!’ She then lost no time in making hot cocoa and frying up some crispy bacon, which she then put between two slices of bread and put in front of Alice. ‘You’ve eaten like a little bird all day long!’ she chided. ‘So tuck into that; I do not want to see a single crumb left on your plate.’
Alice was used to receiving lectures on what to eat and drink, and how not to sleep on your tummy, in case she squashed the babies.
But she didn’t mind. In fact it was comforting to have someone fuss over her.
In all these months she had not once heard from her sister or her mother, though her father had visited many times, always worried, always eager to know how things were going.
Alice was anxious. ‘I don’t like the idea of being cut open,’ she told Tricia now. ‘I’d rather give birth the natural way.’
‘I know you would, child.’ Tricia brought two mugs of hot cocoa, and slid one over to Alice.
‘The thing is, you know what the doctor told us. You’re small-built and you’re carrying two babies. It could be difficult for you to give birth naturally. They’ve already explained, they’re prepared to wait and see, and maybe when the time gets nearer, you might just prove them wrong.’
Alice worked it out. ‘Only three weeks and a day to go until the date they gave me.’
Tricia reminded her, ‘Ah, yes, but they couldn’t say exactly which date the babies might arrive. What they said was, it could be a few days either way.’
‘Well I don’t mind, Grandma. I just want to hold them in my arms.’
Whenever she thought of these precious babies, Alice got all emotional. ‘Wouldn’t it be wonderful if I knew which sex they were?’
‘Utter nonsense! I’ve never heard the like, and anyway, why would any mother want to know whether they were having a boy or a girl…it would spoil the surprise.’
Alice laughed. ‘I think having twins was enough of a surprise for me!’
‘Have you still not settled on names?’ Tricia was excited about her new great grandchildren.
Alice put her out of her misery. ‘I’ll tell you what. For the second names, I’ll keep Father and Grandfather’s, together with two of my own choices for first names. That’s the boys. Then I’ll do the same with the girls…your name and mine for second names. And two others for first names.’
‘Not your mother and sister’s then?’ Tricia was not surprised.
‘Nope.’
Tricia understood. She was well aware that neither Maureen nor Pauline had been anywhere near this house, or even bothered to ask after Alice’s well-being.
‘Right then.’ Tricia was anxious that Alice should eat well. ‘You’d best eat that sandwich before it goes cold. Unless of course you think it’s too disgusting to eat. Is that it? You don’t like my cooking?’
‘No, it’s not that at all,’ Alice promised. ‘It’s just that I’m not really hungry.’ The truth was, her grandmother was not used to cooking for herself the
se days. She had a wonderful little woman from the village who took care of all that; leaving her free to go off on her much-loved charity work.
Tricia tried another tack. ‘You may not be hungry, but what about your babies?’
‘I think they’ll be happy if I just drink my cocoa.’
‘Every last drop?’
‘Of course.’
Tricia smiled at her. ‘Very well then, but you really must try and eat more.’
‘I will.’
‘Promise?’
‘Yes, I promise.’
‘Right then. I’ll be off to my bed. And you had better be close behind me, or I’ll have to come down and fetch you.’
Alice returned her peck on the cheek. ‘Goodnight Grandma.’
‘Goodnight, child.’
Tricia made a confession. ‘I know you’ve not been sleeping lately,’ she revealed. ‘I’ve lain awake in bed, listening to you, walking up and down before creeping down the stairs, then creeping back up again. It’s how I knew you were down here for so long. That’s why I came looking for you…only to find you gazing out the back door with nothing on but your nightgown.’
Her voice dropped to a kindly tone. ‘I know I’m an old nag, but I do worry for you, Alice. You need to take care of yourself,’ she said softly. ‘I know you’ve been through a terrible time, and I know you worry about Joe, but you have two little babies to think of now, and oh, you do look so tired all the time.’
Throwing her arms round Alice, she held her close for a moment. ‘I really do hurt for you, child,’ she said. ‘Your grandfather and I love you so much. You do know that, don’t you?’
Alice assured her that she did know that, and that she loved them back. ‘I honestly don’t know how I would have coped if it hadn’t been for you and Grandfather.’
Tricia smiled at that. ‘Oh, you would have coped,’ she promised. ‘You might be a little thing, but you have a big heart and a streak of stubborness, high as a mountain.’
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