Things were definitely not as exciting as they once were, but we were slowly adapting to a life less crazy. It was a huge adjustment for Raze, but I was there to help him every step of the way.
There were times when the electric bill was late or the water bill was two months behind. I know Raze had considered resorting to his old ways to make some extra cash, but I kept him on track. I kept him honest and focused. I refused to let him slip back into that old lifestyle. He wasn’t that guy. Not anymore. I wouldn’t allow it.
Every other week or so, we’d check out the local animal shelters in search of Raze’s perfect dog. Our rental house had a nice fence around it, but Raze had a dog in mind that he wanted, and we never seemed to find it. He was set on having this specific dog. I found out later it was the same dog he had as a kid, before his mom died. It made sense to me that he’d want to replicate that. I never judged him or made him feel weird about it. I thought it was endearing actually. I promised to keep looking for him, and I told him we’d look for as long as it took.
The Black Ice seemed to leave us alone. I think his dad knew that life wasn’t for him, and I think his dad loved him just enough to leave him alone. He was a complicated man, but I know he did love Raze.
I always wondered if maybe his dad really knew where he was but was watching him from a far.
Raze rarely spoke about his dad that first year. It wasn’t until he saw something once that reminded him of his dad that he briefly brought him up. It was maybe a sentence or two about something his dad did once when he was a kid.
After a few months, I encouraged Raze to get back in touch with his grandparents. We ended up meeting up with them, and they were the sweetest people I’d ever met. They were his mom’s parents and they’d raised him most of his life. He apologized for being a hellion, and his grandmother cried sweet tears of happiness when she wrapped him in a loving embrace.
He showed me pictures of his mom, and he was right. She was beautiful. She looked like a sweet person. Her parents said she was a sweet girl who fell in love with the wrong man, but they emphasized that Raze was a result of that, and they wouldn’t have traded that for anything in the world.
A year after settling in that sleep, Oceanside town, it was safe to say we were deeply in love. I couldn’t imagine spending my life with anyone else but him, and he even told me he loved me. He said he’d never said that to anyone before in his entire life. Not even his dad.
He promised to buy me a beautiful ring someday, when money was less tight, and he wanted to make things official.
I told him we were still young, we still had plenty of time, and I wasn’t going anywhere. We’d come too far to ever throw in the towel. I’d worked too hard to snag him. I wasn’t going anywhere. Ever.
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