Collin’s eyes darted to meet Steve’s. They both expected Mike to finally purge, to finally let go and come to terms. After all, it had been years since Barbara had left.
Before any words came out, Mike shook his head and made something up. Whatever he was about to say retreated back into his damaged psyche. “I’m going to have to go with food. Getting high as fuck, then hitting up Del Taco, Jack in the Box, Cheesecake Factory… damn, I gotta stop. I’m getting too hungry. How ’bout you, Cully?”
“Well, probably my girl,” Collin replied quickly.
“No, man, it’s got to be something more universal,” Alex corrected.
“Well, in that case, probably all our friends and family. So many people we’ll never see again, ya know?”
Everyone missed a little bit of what each other said, but this last thought rang throughout the group. Each nodded in agreement, reminiscing about old friends and loved ones. One by one, they finished their drinks and headed to bed, full, slightly buzzed and completely exhausted.
2120 hours
Before heading inside for the night, Steve walked to the side door. He set one of the Humvee’s gas drums next to the door. “You’re on first shift, Mike, and you’re going to need to fill up the generator, too. Use some from the drums and bring it inside when you’re finished.”
Outside, Mike lounged on a beach chair, manicuring a few of his pot plants. Next to him was a kindling fire in a steel trash bin. ”Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got it,” he hollered back, not taking his focus from his plants. He trimmed off one leaf from the plant and put it in a plastic bag on his lap. He sealed it, then took a lighter and freshly wrapped joint from his pocket and lit up. A deep drag of smoke filled his lungs, then dispersed into the partially cloudy, crescent-moon-lit night sky.
Steve was about to close the door behind him, but something made him stop. He turned around and walked back over to his brother. With the rest of the beach chairs stored, Steve just sat on the cold gravel. He grabbed the joint from in front of his brother and took a small hit, then nearly coughed up a lung.
“Virgin lungs,” Mike laughed, taking back the joint.
“I don’t know how you do it, man.”
“You get used to it,” Mike said, taking another drag.
“That’s just it, isn’t it, bro. You get used to it,” he said, bringing his hands closer to the fire to warm them.
Mike could sense where Steve was going, but kept silent. He had expected this for some time, but was terrified of it.
“I miss her too, ya know? I miss Mom every day. Such a great person taken before her time. When she passed, it killed me. It killed Dad. And I know it killed you. And when the smoke cleared and we were all out of tears, Dad and I said our goodbyes and did our best to move on. But you… I don’t know what happened, but it’s like you stayed behind. Like you couldn’t, or wouldn’t, move on.”
Mike shuffled his feet nervously. He took two hits in quick succession, then ashed out the joint. He didn’t dare make eye contact with Steve. There was no way he was going to cry in front of his brother.
“And I don’t know what’s been going on with you these last couple of years. It’s like you just said ‘fuck you’ to life. Like you stopped caring about everything. Mike, you could have doneanythingyou wanted to do, but you just gave up. Then you hid behind this front of bad decisions, one-night stands and getting stoned every single day. Then that became your life.”
Mike could no longer hold back. His lips trembled violently and tears came pouring down his face. “I just fucking miss her so much!” Steve rose to his feet and put a gentle hand on his brother’s shoulder. Mike wiped his eyes and nose, but in seconds, more tears returned. “She was there for me my whole life. And when she was in the hospital, I wasn’t there for her! During the chemo, I asked her if I should come, but she told me I didn’t have to! But I knew I should have! Then she died and I wasn’t even there with you and Dad.”
“There’s nothing you could have done, bro. It was so sudden. There was nothing any of us could have done—”
“But you were still there! And all I have left to remind me of her is this!” Mike yelled, taking off the cross and holding it tightly in his clenched fist. He kissed the cross in his hand and set it on the ground next to the plants. He walked a few yards away from the fire, welcoming the cold.
Neither brother spoke, not knowing what to say as they relived the memory of that tragic day. Finally, Steve walked over to his brother and broke the silence.
“You know she loved you, right?”
“I know, bro.”
“No, I mean, you know you were her favorite, right?”
Mike began to protest, but Steve cut him off. “No, it’s cool. I know ever parent has one, but they’ll never admit it. I had Dad and you had Mom. You were such a free spirit and she loved that the most about you.”
The tears slowed, and for a split second, Mike showed a half smile.
“But I’m not gonna lie,” Steve continued, “It would kill her to see you like this, to see who you’ve become.”
“I know. And I know that you guys think I’m this useless stoner,” Mike said, moving back closer to the warmth of the fire.
“Come on, bro, we don’t think you’re useless,” Steve said, following him. “It’s just hard to watch someone so smart, someone with so much potential, not use it.”
“So much potential? Come on, Steve. Like what? What could a Chemistry major possibly offer in a world like this?”
Steve immediate grabbed his brother’s shoulder and forced him to face him. “Are you kidding me? Do you want me to start naming things? This past December, back in Pennsylvania, right after we left. Alex cut up his leg real bad. Who got the supplies and made him homemade penicillin? You said it yourself; he could have died from an infection.”
Mike remembered back to that day, but Steve didn’t stop there. “Who taught us how to use chemicals to make water potable if we couldn’t boil it? You did. Who told us which wild mushrooms were poisonous and which were edible? You did! Mike, the list goes on and on. Sure, you may not be an electrician like Billy, a martial artist like Alex, or a military strategist like Collin, but you’re our science expert! I know the weed helps dull the pain, but that’s it. It’s holding you back, not helping you up.”
Mike took a minute to let the whole episode sink in. As much as his stoner mind tried to fight the concept, tried to keep him in his comfortably numb and familiar life, his rationale took over. He knew his brother was right. Barbara would have been so disappointed in him. “You’re right, brother. Starting tomorrow, you guys are going to see a new me. I’m serious. I mean, I’m probably not going to stop smoking right away, but I’m going to seriously cut back, and I’m going to help out a hell of a lot more. Maybe I can even start trying to find a solution to kill the infected in case we run out of ammo or something like that,” he said, nodding to himself.
At that point, they did something they had not done for a long time: they hugged. They held on tight and said, “I love you,” before breaking apart.
“So, you’re going to be all right?” Steve asked before heading inside.
“I think so,” Mike responded truthfully. He had found closure.
Steve smiled hopefully and closed the RV door behind him.
After doing what Steve had asked, Mike returned to his beach chair. “I miss you Mom, and I’ll never forget you,” Mike whispered quietly to himself.I guess if I can’t light a candle for you, this is the next best thing, he thought as he took out one of the flare guns and fired it up into the sky. The beacon parachuted down, glowing and firing out phosphorous fragments. A small smile formed in his lips. For a moment, he felt warmer. He knew it was probably just the fire, but chose to believe it was his mother sitting there with him on that cold April night.
The flare took about a minute to sink to the ground, then consumed itself and withered. Mike watched, but each blink he took was longer and slower until his eyelids closed for go
od.
April 7, 2009
0420 hours
The garage gate shook violently, as though an 8.0 earthquake had struck. Mike snapped awake.What the fuck was that? He thought, scrambling to his feet. He looked out to where the sound had come from and noticed a lone infected man grabbing the metal fencing. “Where the hell did you come from?”
Determining one infected behind a sturdy fence to be no cause for alarm, Mike lowered his guard. He reached into his pocket and withdrew a fresh joint, lit it, and walked toward the beast.
“You scared the shit out of me, I’ll give you that,” he said, exhaling a trail of smoke in the infected man’s face, further enraging the beast. Out of curiosity, Mike took a moment to stare at it. Through a column of metal rods, Mike aimed his 9mm pistol at the creature’s forehead. “Do you feel lucky punk? Do ya?”
Before he could squeeze the trigger, three more undead emerged from the darkness and smashed their bodies against the gate. Their arms reached through the columns, clawing at him. Completely shocked, Mike stumbled back. His finger impulsively squeezed the trigger as he fell to the ground. From the shadows, more sprinters ran and hit the fence, shaking it hysterically. Mike was in full panic mode. He picked up his gun and fired rapidly at those trying to climb over.
The cousins rushed to the door of the RV at the sound of gunfire and took in the scene. The initial handful of infected had now multiplied into well over twenty. Billy, Alex, Steve, and Collin didn’t bother to put on clothes. Instead, they armed their weapons and joined the fight.
“What the hell happened?” Collin shouted to Mike over the gunfire.
“I fucked up. I think they saw my flare.”
“Flare?”
“Yeah, I snagged one from the score and shot it…”
Before Collin could scold Mike, a section of the gate buckled and infected funneled through. They switched their gunfire to that position and Collin screamed for everyone to fall back.
“Guys, we can’t win this fight. We need to get inside!”
One by one, the cousins fell back, and one by one, the infected barged through the opening. Mike, the last to draw back, noticed that he had left his mother’s cross on the gravel near his chair. To the others it looked as though he was running back for the marijuana plants.
“What are you doing?” Steve shouted from the RV’s door. “Forget ’em, Mike! They’re on your ass!” Steve lifted his rifle and fired at the most immediate threats, but there were too many. He took down two, but a third was too quick.
Just as Mike snatched up the cross, a half-naked man bum rushed him from his blind side and knocked him over. They crashed into beach chair and plants, whose porcelain containers shattered upon impact. As Mike braced for the fall, he let go of the gun, which dropped just out of reach. Mike wailed, desperately trying to free himself from the infected man’s clutches.
The man pulled back like a Cobra snake, then lunged and bit Mike’s hand that held the cross. The beast clamped down hard, forcing Mike to let go of the cross. Mike screamed and curled his free hand into a fist and knocked the man off him. Howling in pain, Mike reached his bloody hand toward Steve, calling for help.
###
From Steve’s point of view, time seemed to slow. All hell was breaking loose around them, but his focus was solely on Mike. He couldn’t believe his eyes. His brother had been bit. Steve broke out of his trance and tried to run toward his injured brother, but Billy grabbed him and held him back. He was only thirty-five feet away, but the gap seemed endless. By now, two more undead had leapt onto Mike’s body in a dog-pile. Bits of flesh were torn away from Mike’s arms, and blood poured onto the gravel. Steve repeatedly tried to break free from Billy’s grasp to aid his brother but to no avail.
“Mike, hold on! I’m coming! Let go of me, Billy!” Steve screamed as tears ran down his cheeks.
Before the infected could eat Mike alive, Collin grabbed the rifle from Steve’s hand and fired at Mike’s attackers. They dropped next to Mike’s battered body. Near the driver’s door, Alex continued covering them with calculated bursts from his M16.
“Collin, get everyone out of here!” Mike shouted.
“He’s right, we have to go now!” Collin ordered. “There’s nothing more we can do for him.”
Mike crawled to his pistol and fired at incoming infected. “I love you, bro. Take care of yourself. I’ll see ya on the other side.”
“Mike! No! You’re going to be okay! We’ll treat it! You still have some time!” Steve screamed.
“Don’t worry, little brother, I’m not turning into one of them,” Mike said, reaching into his pocket. He pulled out a grenade and set it next to him then reached back in for something else. “I always said I’d go out with a bang.” The second item was a massive joint. Mike weakly raised it to his lips. His hands trembled, but he lit it and inhaled deeply. “I was saving it for California, but what the hell. What are you guys still doing here? Do you want to end up like me?”
Collin helped Billy pull Steve inside, and then locked the door.
Steve’s lips quivered. “Mike…”
Steve put his head against the kitchen window and stared at his brother, eyes glazed and red with tears. It was the second time he had had to leave a loved one behind, and it hurt just as much.
Mike fired until he ran out of bullets. When he was out, he set down his gun and picked up his cross. He calmly put the necklace on, and then picked up the grenade. “I’ll see you soon, Mom,” he whispered. He took one final hit, then pulled the pin and waited until five infected drew close, then released the spring. The explosion killed Mike instantly, but he took all five infected with him.
The undead bodies blocked much of the blast’s concussive effect, but some of the shrapnel lodged itself into parts of Sweetie’s exterior. Everyone saw the tragedy, but no one spoke, not even a gasp. Mike had made his choice; they would mourn for him later. Collin turned on the ignition, and the lights blared on. In front of them, infected surged into Fort Kennedy.
“I don’t think I can plow through this gate, guys!” Collin yelled to the back.
“Well, you sure as hell better do something,” Alex said, “and fast!”
“Maybe you don’t have to,” Billy said. He scrambled to the back, looking for something. He returned in less than five-seconds, bringing with him the RPG. He lifted the roof hatch. “As soon as I fire, step on it. It’ll be our only shot!”
Billy threw the hatch back and awkwardly pulled the rocket launcher through. He followed the headlights and aimed at the gate in front, now swarming with undead.
“Fuck you!” Billy screamed, pulling the trigger.
The rocket zoomed through the air and hit the fence head on. The blast blew the gate open and scattered all nearby infected. Pieces of gravel and dust peppered the windshield. Collin covered his eyes out of instinct and slammed on the gas. Billy lowered himself back in and held on as Collin raged forward.
“Where the hell did they come from?” Alex asked.
“No idea, and if we don’t make it out of here, then it sure as hell won’t matter!” Collin replied.
As Collin turned from the dirt road, he looked left, back toward Salt Lake City. Hundreds of undead, the ones who couldn’t run, flooded the highway, inching their way toward their companions. Collin turned the wheel right and skidded back onto the highway, heading westbound.
Sadness filled the RV. Not one word was spoken as they sped away from Fort Kennedy. Steve’s head stayed glued to the window, his mind fixated on his brother. Alex laid his arm on Steve’s shoulder, offering condolences. Billy sat across, expressing his own sympathy. They were broken. One cousin—one brother—down.
0653 hours
Rays of sunlight began to appear in the horizon, burning away the morning fog. The mountain air was cool, but Collin’s blood remained on fire. After passing a sign welcoming them to Nevada, Collin stopped the RV on a turnout. He got out and slammed the door shut, stirring the rest to a groggy awakenin
g. The others rubbed their eyes from the lack of sleep. They stretched their sore bodies and dragged their feet out of the RV. Steve leaned against the RV, staring out into the horizon, unable to think, unable to process anything.
Collin looked up to the sky and released a long, loud and painful howl. No one said anything; they all knew what he was feeling. They all felt it. They waited for Collin to say something, anything. He paced back and forth, running his fingers through his hair.
“Why the hell did he go back for those damn plants?” Collin ranted. “He’s such an idiot! Why? Why didn’t he listen?”
“Hey, man, have some respect. We just lost a brother!” Billy yelled, cutting him off.
Collin ignored Billy and screamed to the sky once more. “Stupid, stupid Mike! He could have gotten us all killed. Over what? Some fucking pot? What the hell were you thinking, Mike? You fucking idiot!”
Billy ran over to Collin and took a swing at him. His fist connected with Collin’s chin, knocking him to the ground. Blood ran from Collin’s mouth. Billy jumped on top of him, but before he could follow up with another swing, Alex restrained him.
“He’s our fucking blood, Collin. Have some respect!” Billy yelled, struggling to be released.
Collin got up, wiped his mouth and charged Billy. Alex did his best to use his body to block the two.
“Fuck you, Bill!” Collin yelled.
“Enough, guys! Damn it to hell!” Steve screamed, snapping out of his sorrowful trance. “Collin’s right, Mike fucked up!”
Billy shrugged Alex off of him, swearing to cease all aggression. “You always take his side, Steve. What the fuck? He was your brother, and you’re just going to let Collin disrespect him?”
“Yes, he was my brother, but I’ll be the first to admit it. Not for shooting off the flare. He could have never known that the infected had followed us. He fucked up for going back. I talked to him last night, and we had a fucking breakthrough. He was finally going to get his shit together,” Steve said, momentarily stopping to reflect back on the happiness and closure his brother had found just hours ago. “I yelled for him to forget the plants, but he wouldn’t listen. And that got him killed! I know this hurts us all, but we can’t lose it, guys. We just can’t. We need to focus. We need to make it to California.”
The Longest Road (Book 1) Page 16