"When Hell freezes over," one man interrupted, catching her eye.
Sarkis jumped to his feet and the man corrected himself, "When Hell freezes over, ma'am."
Mel burst out laughing. "Have you ever seen Hell? Any of you?" Heads shook slowly. "The lowest level in Hell is frozen over. A series of ice lakes used for both punishment and cooling some of the administration areas of Hell, including Lucifer's private office and apartment. Hell froze over thousands of years ago, so it's not an excuse that'll work here."
Glances were exchanged around the table and Mel felt their unease increase, though it couldn't match hers. The longer this took, the more her knees felt like they were going to buckle.
Sarkis cleared his throat. "Ma'am, there was considerable discussion last night about you, Lucifer and Lilith. You do look a lot like her and everyone knows no angel's been into Hell and come out untainted, so it's a lot to take in. Especially when we all saw how close you let Lucifer get yesterday. The boys would like some assurances that you're who you say you are. What with the doors closed and all, it's not like there are any demons around to see. We deal with demons every day and the distrust sort of comes with the territory, so to speak."
Mel nodded. She understood. Closing her eyes, she released the restraints on her power, feeling it flow around her as comfortably as it did in Heaven. Her skin tingled as her lavender linen dress transformed into gold silk. The weight of her wings faded into being, heavier than she remembered, as they stretched from ceiling to floor. She permitted the glow to continue haloing her whole body as it would on a formal occasion in Heaven – this was no time for half measures. These angels could handle the radiance of one of their superiors. Heaven knew she needed all the strength she could muster to do this.
The door moved silently open and Luce sidled in, carrying two cups of coffee. He clicked the door shut behind him and beamed at Mel. "Sorry I'm late. The coffee machine ran out of milk and I had to send Mephi –"
His voice was drowned out by the scrape of eight angelic swords sliding out of their sheaths as the Exousiai moved between Luce and Mel.
Sarkis stood closest to her. "We're here to protect you, ma'am."
Mel sighed. "Not from Luce or my morning coffee. Please put them away, sit down and let me set things straight."
Luce swept past the defensive line and circled the boardroom table until he stood at Mel's side. "I keep my promises," he said, handing over her mug. "And you look heavenly."
She inhaled and brought the macchiato to her lips.
"Ma'am, don't!" Sarkis cried. "You don't know what's in that!"
"Yes she does," Luce responded mildly. "If I've stuffed it up, I'll have to make another cup, and this meeting's running late enough as it is. Now, Mel said to put your swords away and sit down, which sounds like a great idea to me." He enthroned himself in the chair closest to Mel and winked at her over his coffee. "Do you care to wager how long it'll take before they realise they look ridiculous, guarding against an empty threat with weapons so obsolete they belong in a museum? Where did you dig these angels up, Mel? Or are they the best Raphael could find?"
The angels bristled even more, showing no signs of backing down. "We don't take orders from demons," one said, baring his teeth.
Oh Hell. This was harder than she'd imagined. Why couldn't Raphael have briefed them properly so she didn't have to undergo this ordeal? Maybe when she opened her eyes they'd be the friendly angels she was used to and not the cold, hard warriors they turned into in the presence of demons. If only…
Warm fingers enveloped hers and Mel stared down at Luce's reassuring hand. She could do this. She could. And Luce would help her.
She took a deep, calming breath. "Who did George place in command?"
Sarkis bowed. "That would be me, ma'am."
"Good. Sarkis, get your boys to stand down. I don't have all day for this briefing and I want you settled in by lunch. I'd like you to summarise what you've been told and I'll see what I can do to sort this mess out."
"In front of him?" Sarkis jerked his head at Luce.
Luce grinned and slurped his coffee as he stood. "Paranoid Powers. Excuse me, Exousiai. If it'll make it easier for you, Mel, I'll leave. If their orders come from Raphael, I can imagine what they are anyway. They've been told to watch my every move and protect you from me." He kissed her hand. "I'll be waiting in my office until you want me, Mel. I promised you Japanese for lunch and you know I'll deliver."
Mel's fingers tightened around his. "No, I'd like you to stay, Luce. This is ridiculous and it must stop. Gentlemen, may I introduce Luce Iblis, the CEO of the HELL Corporation and we'll be working in cooperation with him as –"
"We also don't cooperate with demons. We hunt them down and banish them back to Hell."
Mel wasn't sure which angel had spoken, but she didn't wait to work it out. She continued, "Luce Iblis, also known as Lucifer, Lord of Hell and he's no longer a demon. So any attempt to banish him to Hell won't work." She paused for a moment to let her words sink in. "Sarkis, for everyone here, could you please describe your chain of command, starting with the highest rank?"
Sarkis coughed. "Well, highest is you, ma'am. After that, Raphael, then St George, then me."
She nodded serenely. "And your orders from George are?"
"Come here and find out what in Hell's going on," he replied promptly.
"From Raphael?"
He hesitated. "Protect you. And no swords."
Blades lowered and slid back into sheaths.
Sarkis swallowed. "Your orders, ma'am?"
Mel smiled. "I'd like you to sit down and listen to what I have to say. Afterwards, you can ask all the questions we have time for. And anyone who doesn't feel that they can conscionably follow my orders may leave."
"No, ma'am."
She raised her eyebrows and Sarkis continued, "Yes and no, ma'am. They'll be sitting and listening, but they won't be leaving. In a hostile situation where a squad of us are surrounded by demons, we follow orders under the chain of command. And we don't desert our comrades in arms. Anyone who can't do that has no place in the Exousiai."
Sarkis and the other angels promptly sat down and gave her their full attention. Scrutiny…oh Hell. She squeezed Luce's hand and felt his love and support flow through the connection.
Mel forced herself to say, "I think you'll find the HELL Corporation is less hostile than you expect."
"No, ma'am. We're in the presence of the Lord of Hell, who, demon or not, has every demon on Earth and in Hell under his command. The only thing I trust a demon to do is raise Hell."
Luce burst out laughing. "I've changed my mind. I like this one." He raised his empty cup to Sarkis.
Sarkis didn't smile.
Mel blew out a breath. "All right. I'd like you boys to form a complaints department here in HELL."
Sarkis looked like he was trying not to laugh, but he managed to compose himself.
She hurried to get the words out before her voice died. "It's not a joke. I'll arrange one of the agency girls to take your calls – Gabi's good with a switchboard, so she'd be my first choice – and your job will be to investigate complaints about anything the HELL Corporation has jurisdiction over. Based on the calls I've fielded, most of them will be from humans, and they'll be human problems for you to investigate and solve within your level of expertise…up to and including working miracles. You'll report direct to me, no one else. Now, if you get a complaint against one or more of the demonic staff here…just like you usually do, I want you to investigate and report back to me on the incident. I'll discuss your preferred course of action with Luce and get back to you on what you're authorised to do."
Mel paused to stare at Sarkis' raised hand. "Yes?"
"I have a question," said Sarkis. "What if the complaint is about a demon inciting city-wide riots? Lots of people injured and lots of property damage…would you consider exile to Hell at sword-point appropriate action?"
"It would depend on the demon and
the circumstances, but perhaps –"
"Was it Baraqiel?" Luce interrupted.
Sarkis nodded once.
"Then no. He's supposed to be in Level Eight, serving out a year after his last escape from Hell. Exile's not good enough. This time, I'm going to chain him to something. Several somethings. You do the exile thing and I'll send a note to Geryon to expect him and take care of it when he arrives." He met Mel's stare. "What? I'm still the Lord of Hell. Demons are my problem. I never had the luxury of choosing the perfect person for the job. I make do with those that were dumped in Hell with me. Do you want him in one of the HELL Corporation units instead? He's not trained for anything except causing trouble. No way in Hell do I want him up here in the office again. He's utterly useless for anything but target practice. If they send him back to Hell in pieces, fine by me. He'll fit in a smaller box."
Mel breathed an inward sigh of relief as the tension in the room broke: most of the angels grinned, or at least looked less grim. Yes, this would work. Thank Heaven Luce was an expert at demon wrangling – he'd been doing it for longer than most of the Exousiai. And there was nothing these soldiers respected more than a veteran.
Mel closed the door to her office and walked right into Luce's welcoming arms. Relief cascaded from her like a warm shower. It was over. The Exousiai complaints unit were in their secluded office space, segregated from demons by virtue of their converted storeroom location.
"You were magnificent, Melody," she heard him say.
Against his chest, she managed a watery smile of disbelief. She'd succeeded, and that was all that mattered. She wasn't sure what she would've done without him there. Who'd have guessed a year ago that she'd be thankful for Lucifer?
"Thank you," she said, her voice muffled by his shirt.
The door clicked open. Mel turned her head to see who'd intruded on what should have been a private moment, but she didn't let go of Luce for fear her wobbly legs would betray her. "Yes?" she asked.
Sarkis squeezed into the room and shut the door behind him. "I didn't want to interrupt, ma'am, but I need to discuss a personal matter."
Mel kissed Luce on the lips before gently disengaging from his embrace. He reminded her to grab him when she wanted lunch, then left her alone with Sarkis, who got straight to the point.
"Ma'am, what were you so afraid of in there?"
Mel sighed. For all of Luce's talk of magnificence, she knew she'd been a nervous wreck.
"Sit down, Sarkis. And please call me Mel. If I let demons do it, you certainly can." She waved at the client chair on the other side of her desk.
"Ma'am…Mel…if you're afraid of Lucifer, you know we're here to protect you. As it is, I don't know how to make head or tails of whatever's going on here. Raphael says one thing, you say another; and while I'd usually say Lucifer is the Lord of Lies, I didn't spot a single untruth today. What's the world coming to when a demon is more honest than an angel?"
"Difficult times, as I'm sure you know," Mel replied. "No, I'm not afraid of Luce. I'm more than a match for him and he's a surprisingly good match for me, though for different reasons. My problem today was…personal and quite embarrassing, really, so I'd prefer not to discuss it. Luce knew I'd struggle today and he was trying to help."
Sarkis nodded. "And what would you do if one of my men had attacked Lucifer – in your defence, of course?"
Mel bit her lip. "As I did before Heaven's gates, I'd defend him."
"So no swords for any of my men?" He coughed. "That's going to be difficult to enforce, given the number of demons here."
"I don't object to weapons in the slightest, just not in the office. Especially anywhere near Luce." Mel sighed. "Perhaps tell your men that Luce has my permission to insert any weapon used offensively up its owner's fundamental orifice, though I'm sure you'll put it more succinctly than that."
"Attack Lucifer and he'll shove your sword up your arse," Sarkis blurted out, then thought better of it. "Sorry, ma'am. I mean Mel."
She laughed. "Oh, I've heard worse. Wait until you hear the harpies talking about the latest erotica book they're reading in the lunchroom. I'm sure even your boys will blush. I know I do."
"So the official position is what you told us in the café – Lucifer is your responsibility and we're to stick to the lesser demons?"
Mel nodded slowly.
"And what about the unofficial one? What is the Lord of Hell to you?"
While she preferred honesty to lies, some information was not for common knowledge. "Luce and I are together. It's not a secret, but we do try to keep our relationship quiet, as it does shock many people. Of course he's seductive, but he's more than that to me, or his brash brand of seduction would have gotten him nowhere. Despite his dark wings, Luce is no demon – I couldn't have considered what we have if he wasn't an angel. And while he might hide things from others, he can't hide anything from me." At Sarkis' suspicious look, she reached out. "Give me your hand, Sarkis. Let me show you what I mean."
He reluctantly placed his hand on hers. "I'm a soldier, not a soul-reader, so I apologise in advance if I don't understand."
Mel laughed. "It takes a lot of practice and I've had the time for it. You'll see just fine." She closed her eyes and focussed on the memory of the stormy night when Luce came to her home, begging for help and a kiss. She watched the memory fondly until the kiss was complete, then gently pulled her hand from Sarkis'. He didn't need to know how far they'd proceeded after the kiss. "You see?"
Sarkis fell to his knees, his eyes firmly fixed on the carpet. "I'm sorry, my lady. I should never have doubted you. It takes a powerful angel to survive an encounter with Lucifer and before today I'd have said his redemption was impossible. Yet you…you…conquered the darkest demon there is with a simple kiss. I am…in awe."
Mel smiled shyly. "You make it sound like it was all my doing, when Luce's own fortitude played a significant part in his redemption. Without his powerful desire to conquer his own darkness, nothing I did would've helped him at all." She paused for a moment, then continued, "Most demons aren't aware of the change. The very nature of their souls prevents soul-reading. But with Luce on my side, I want to take his initial idea of a global HELL Corporation and turn it into a power for good. While deals and domination are definitely demonic, a company with this sort of worldwide reach can help untold millions. But for that, I need your team to police the demons, to make sure humans don't suffer while the company grows. I need you to maintain order the way only Exousiai can, because I have other responsibilities." She glanced down. "Please get up. I try to keep things very low-key around here as many of the demons have never heard of Lady Muriel, nor the power I hold." She waved at herself and the simple linen dress she wore once more. "No wings, no gold finery, no glow. To them, I'm very much an ordinary angel called Mel."
Sarkis clambered stiffly to his feet. "An extraordinary angel who can do the impossible and negotiate a middle road between angels and demons. Don't doubt yourself. I will do whatever you need me to. What would you like me to report to George?"
"Whatever you feel you need to. I'd recommend full disclosure, as that would make it easier for you to request reinforcements should the need arise. If I know him, he already suspected something when Raphael requested Exousiai to do the work of a lowly guardian angel."
Sarkis executed an elaborate bow. "Being your guardian would be an honour and nothing less. It's a pity you need no such protection."
This time, they laughed together.
Mephi perched on Luce's visitor chair beside Mel. Luce watched with interest as his PA returned Mel's smile before donning her usual professional mask. The demon dropped a yellow folder on Luce's desk and tapped with a scarlet-lacquered fingernail. "I have everything you asked for, Mr Iblis. Miss Black's schedule, travel arrangements, bookings, credit card statements. I have some of her email and IT records, too."
Luce leaned forward. "I'm sorry. Miss Black?"
"Persephone Black is the name she goes by at present
, Luce," Mel said. She seemed uncomfortable about something, but didn't say anything else.
Mephi's pursed lips expressed her disapproval. "You didn't know your own PA's name?"
"I only met her a few days before we flew out," Luce replied defensively. "She handled all the travel arrangements, not me. And you'd booked everything in my name. I never needed to use her name." He grinned. "All I had to do was snap my fingers and –"
"Mr Iblis, I have explained the concept of sexual harassment to you. Would you like another briefing to refresh your memory?" Mephi's stern expression contrasted strongly with Mel's gentle laughter.
Mel managed to get a hold of herself. "I'm sorry, Mephi, but Luce probably has a good case against Persi for sexual harassment. As I understand it, all the unwanted invitations were made by her, and she persevered, despite numerous refusals."
Mephi's expression was one of disbelief. Her eyes rested on Luce.
"All right, once," Luce snapped. "She'd been begging to give me a blowjob for a week. She was on her knees and she already had me out of my pants. I figured if I let her, maybe she'd shut up for a few minutes." He sneaked a glance at Mel, praying she wouldn't reject him for his momentary weakness.
To his shock, Mel burst out laughing. "If there's one thing I taught Persi, it's not to talk with her mouth full."
Luce felt himself reddening under the combined weight of Mel's amused and Mephi's disapproving gazes. Did Mel think so little of him that she found it no surprise that he would sleep around at the slightest invitation? Or had Persephone already told her? What else had the nephilim said? Had she belittled his size and skill and stamina? She'd told plenty of other lies about him – why not that? His hands itched to wrap around the girl's neck and choke the life from her.
"But first we have to find her and that's why we're here," Mel continued. "Mephi, please give us a summary of what you know, so we can plan how to proceed."
To Hell and Back Page 5