But it could also be the things I said to her before the market. I wasn’t mean, just truthful. It’s unfortunate, because I have no idea how to read the subtleties in her mood.
“So…we need to talk about Doug’s tendency to provoke you,” she says, finally breaking the silence.
“What do we need to say?”
“Just that you shouldn’t let him push your buttons like that.” Suddenly, pictures are running through my mind—a control panel with glowing buttons, an elevator with lit numbers to denote the floors— “Oh sorry, that probably wasn’t the best way to state that. What I mean is…it’s obvious Doug is deliberately trying to get to you. You need to shake it off.”
I blink. “I don’t want to shake it off. If he offends someone I care about, I’m going to make him pay for it. Once someone is on my bad side, they are there forever.”
“Forever? Really? You don’t forgive?”
I think about that for a moment. “I see no reason to give a bad person a second chance to hurt me—or someone else I care about.”
“Hmm. That makes you sound kind of stubborn.”
“I am stubborn. And I’m proud of that fact.”
She blows out a breath, muttering as she shakes her head. “Men.”
I frown. “Women say that a lot.”
“It’s because men tend to annoy us quite often.”
I signal and exit the off-ramp on the freeway. “Mia says that same thing.”
“She’s an ally, even though she’s defected to the other side.” She folds her arms across her chest.
“What other side? The man side?” I ask.
Jenna is looking out the window, but I steal a glance at her face. I can see she’s smiling. “The relationship side. When people get into a relationship, they change.”
I think about this for a moment. “Do you think it’s because of the other person? That being with that person changes them?”
She frowns for a minute and her head turns toward me. My eyes are on the road, but I can tell she’s watching my profile. My hands tighten on the wheel, and I’m so distracted that I almost take too long to hit the brakes at the red light.
“I think it changes attitudes and perceptions. I don’t think it can change the people themselves. I guess it’s different when you’re with your soulmate, though. And no one can say that Adam and Mia aren’t fated for each other.”
“Souls can’t mate. Only bodies…” I’m hit with the image of Jenna and I together on her bed, her body against mine. I wonder what her skin feels like. Is it as soft as it looks? I want to know.
“People can be fated for each other. They have their one true love,” she replies.
I shake my head. “That sounds ridiculous. What if your soulmate was born on another continent? Or fifty years after you?”
She shrugs and then relaxes her shoulders. “That’s just what I believe.”
“And you? Do you think you would know if you met your soulmate?” I’m suddenly hoping—even though I don’t believe in this—that she thinks I’m her soulmate. That would make things so much easier. That would give her the reason to stay.
“I already did…a long time ago.”
A weight drops in my stomach. She loves someone else? Then why isn’t she with him? Maybe he doesn’t want her. No, that can’t be right. I can’t think of any idiot who wouldn’t want Jenna.
But my throat’s closed up. I can’t ask. I want to change the subject, so I do.
“My dad and stepmother are having a family dinner tonight. It’s a regular thing on Sundays, and I usually go alone. Will you come with me? Adam and Mia will be there. And you could meet my sister and brother-in-law and my two nephews.”
She’s quiet for a few moments. “We haven’t gotten very far in our work, though. I’d like to try some yoga next.”
“I know some yoga. My martial arts trainer uses it to warm up.”
“Okay. I’ll come to dinner on the condition that afterward we go to your house to try working on some new exercises.”
“It’s a deal. I’ll pick you up at five-thirty?”
“That sounds good.” I drop her off minutes later and drive home, trying not to think of Jenna and her soulmate. The impossible seems to be slipping out of reach, and if I let it, I will lose hope. I can’t allow that to happen.
Chapter 15
Jenna
William picked me up right on time—of course he did. He was wearing a knit shirt and jeans, looking even more stunning than in his medieval garb.
We pulled into the driveway of a large home in the hills of North Tustin. I noted with surprise the butterflies in my stomach when I got out of the car and reminded myself that I was just meeting the family of a friend. Usually, I was pretty chill about meeting the parents. I’d been in enough short-term relationships that I knew it happened around the tenth date or so—maybe a month or two into the relationship. It was easy to measure a guy’s enthusiasm by how quickly he dragged you out to meet them. First date? Hell no. The guy was potential stalker material, which meant cut and run quickly. If the guy waited too long or made vague excuses when the subject came up, then he had something to hide.
Fortunately, I had the perfect excuse—albeit a shitty one—to never return the favor. But at least I never had to disappoint my parents by taking a soon-to-be ex to meet them.
But this was…I didn’t know what this was. William and I weren’t dating. We were hanging out. Working toward a common goal. Okay, and kissing. There had definitely been kissing.
William led me into the house without a word, and I was greeted at the door by Mia’s mom—William’s new stepmom—Kim. I’d met her before and she gave me a warm hug.
“Jenna, so glad to see you.”
“Great to see you, too. You look fantastic!” And she did. Marriage agreed with her.
Mia’s mom met Adam’s uncle, who was also William’s dad, not long after Adam and Mia had begun dating. They’d fallen in love and married, beating Adam and Mia to the altar. Some of our friends—especially Jordan—liked to tease Mia and Adam about being “kissing cousins.” But I thought the whole thing was wonderful. Seemed you could meet your soulmate at any stage of your life.
I wished my mom would be open to finding love again, but Papa had been her soulmate, and so for her, it was over. Why look for someone else? In that, I agreed with her.
Mia appeared beside her mother. They strongly resembled each other, both dark hair, brown eyes, tall and slender. But Mia didn’t have a smile on her face—it was more like a frozen grimace.
“Jenna! What a surprise to see you here.” Her eyes darted to William. She leaned over, and he stooped to bring his cheek to her level for a kiss. “William, you didn’t tell us Jenna was coming. I’ll go set another place at the table.” Then without even looking at me, Mia spun around and left.
“So let’s get you introduced to the people you haven’t met. Peter’s in the kitchen.” Kim took my arm. “Liam, Adam wanted to talk to you, but he’s on the phone right now. Something about work.”
My eyes darted nervously around the room. All at once, I realized that it had been a mistake for me to come with William. Everyone here was going to get the wrong idea, and naturally, William could not have predicted that, with his myopia toward social situations. He was just imitating the rest of his family members, who’d likely brought their dates from time to time. Suddenly, the butterflies were buzzing wasps.
I entered the crowded kitchen, instantly assailed by the scent of cheesy, meaty, garlicky goodness hanging in the air. Mia had her back to me, pulling out utensils from a drawer. A tall gentleman in his early fifties was easily recognizable as a Drake, and there was another woman who looked to be about thirty years old.
Kim began making introductions. “Peter, this is Mia’s friend, Jenna. She came with Liam.”
Peter struck me as a quiet, stoic type, not unlike his son, though he did manage eye contact. Nevertheless, they were unmistakably father and son. “Great to
meet you, Jenna. I’ve heard about you from Mia. All good things. Welcome, and I hope you like lasagna.”
“Love it, thanks.”
“Here’s Britt, Liam’s big sister,” Kim continued.
“Please don’t use ‘big’ to describe me. Good God,” she said, placing her hands on her hips. “I’m already feeling self-conscious about these love handles. Still haven’t made any progress on the new springtime diet!”
Unlike Peter and William, Britt was short. She had dark blonde hair and blue eyes, and I assumed she looked like her mother. She also talked fast and laughed loudly. A mirror opposite of her younger brother. “You’re going to see two little hooligans around here somewhere, probably trouncing each other on the Xbox. They’re mine.”
“It’s great to meet you all,” I said to the room with false cheer.
Britt was wiping her hands on her apron. She smiled, but her eyes narrowed a fraction. “So you’re the reason Liam’s doubling down on the sword dueling?”
I blinked and my mouth opened, at a loss for how to answer that. “Uh…”
She waved me off. “It’s okay. I’m glad. The fighting has been good for him, actually. All that training has pulled him away from his obsessions. I mean, he’s so damn talented, but other than work, I don’t think he ever has an excuse to leave the house. He’s got his whole studio set up there and his blacksmith forge. Sometimes I go weeks and wonder if I still even have a brother.”
“Well…I’m…glad to help. And that’s all I’m doing, you know. Just helping.” My face started to burn. Oh, goddess.
Three pairs of eyes were now staring at me. Oh shit. Now they were going to think I had no interest in William and get defensive or—oh crap.
This awkward family meet-and-greet seemed to have higher stakes than previous ones. I actually cared about what people thought of me at this one.
“I’m moving soon. Traveling with the Renaissance Faire starting at the end of June. We’re moving up the coast to Northern California for most of the summer then up through the Northwest. The Faire travels all over the western states. I’m really excited about it.” By now, I was getting radiation burns from my blushing.
Britt was nodding her head. “That’s great… So, you don’t go to college?”
Peter darted a sharp look at his daughter, but she ignored him.
“Uh, I did. I studied physics.”
“Ah, so are you going on to grad school?” Britt asked.
“Um, I need to borrow Jenna for a minute,” Mia said with a tug on my elbow.
Awash with relief, I followed her out of the kitchen and down the hall toward one of the bedrooms. “Thank you,” I murmured quietly.
“You needed saving. Britt is awesome, but she can get brutal when she’s in third-degree mode. She works for the Department of Justice.”
“Cripes. It was like being grilled by the CIA.”
“William doesn’t bring a woman here every day. Or any day, for that matter.”
I shook my head. “I don’t get that. There’s half a dozen girls in the clan who are in love with him.”
“A couple in his department at work, too. But he doesn’t date.”
“Ah.”
“Or…does he?” She turned to me with raised eyebrows.
Oh dear, talk about CIA interrogators. Mia was about to turn into one herself.
Not if I could help it. “So what’s all this?” I asked, taking in an art table, paints and shelves. We were in a bedroom with no bed.
“This was William’s bedroom. The three of them, William, Adam and Britt, all grew up in this house. When he’s over here—especially for the bigger family gatherings—he sometimes dips into his old room and tinkers away at stuff to avoid the crowd.”
“I see.” I moved around the table to take a look at what was on it. A massive sketchpad and some watercolor paints. There were doodles and small renderings, but nothing major. What I did see showed the incredible talent that I’d heard so much about and the tiny glimpses that I’d seen for myself.
“Britt said something about William having an art studio?”
“Yeah, at his house. But I don’t suppose you’ll be seeing that anytime soon,” Mia said meaningfully. She was not going to drop the subject about how the world would implode if William and I started dating each other.
I sighed. “I’ve already been to his house to help him with his crowd issues.”
Mia opened her mouth to say more, but Adam appeared in the doorway, shoving his cell phone into his shirt pocket. Like his cousin, Adam was tall, dark and very good looking. The Family Drake had certainly scored big with the genetic lottery. “I’ve been sent as the messenger to let you know that it’s dinnertime.”
“Great,” Mia said. Pressing up against him in the doorway, she snagged the phone out of his pocket. “I’ll be right there after I throw this in the pool.”
He laughed and kissed her on the nose. “Don’t be grumpy. It was important. “
“You promised…”
He let out a long sigh. “Okay. Turn it off, then.”
And he didn’t have to tell her twice. She powered down the phone, then slipped it into her bra with a laugh and trotted down the hallway.
“I’m going to enjoy going after that later,” he said, turning to follow her.
I brought up the rear, still marveling at what I’d seen on William’s sketchpad. We were going over to his house after dinner, and I was going to make it my mission to see inside his art studio.
If I could make it out of family interrogation hell....
***
Hours later, William and I were sitting in the middle of the floor on the mat in his gym-slash-living room, ready to take on the art of meditation.
My plan was to get him so relaxed that he’d agree to go to Disneyland with me. I was convinced that if we could conquer the chaos of Main Street USA and penetrate Sleeping Beauty’s castle without having to surrender, we’d have a very good chance of vanquishing William’s phobia of crowds.
“You’re a Dungeons and Dragons player, right?” I asked. “We’re going to approach this like you would a D&D game.” Again with that skeptical look on his face.
I caught a glimpse into his brown eyes that were the color of dark chocolate. He had amazing eyes fringed with dark lashes. Even if he didn’t gaze deeply into mine, they were still enjoyable to look at. In fact, I never stopped appreciating William’s good looks.
“How is this like D&D?”
I shrugged. “Well, you envision what the Dungeon Master is describing to you, right? ‘You enter a room that is so dark you can only see a few feet around each torch. There’s a musty smell in the air and the echoes of water dripping in the distance.’ Et cetera. It’s all about creating the story in your mind as you experience it in your Dungeon Master’s campaign. What we’re going to do is similar to that.”
“Only less fun and without the dice rolling,” he said.
I laughed. “Right. But you can put your D&D skills to work when setting up a way to be in a crowd without allowing it to affect you. Just visualize your preferred scenario, perhaps one where you are a hero fighting off evil.”
His brows knit as he contemplated that, and then I replayed in my mind the words I’d just spoken. “And you know, that’s really true. You really are a hero fighting off the evil ex.” I laughed. “At least in my book, you are.”
He focused intently on my fingers as I traced random shapes on the mat in front of me.
I straightened. “Now…take some deep breaths and relax. Just close your eyes and picture yourself in a room with five other people.”
“What sort of room?”
“It doesn’t matter. Any room. A large room.”
“Okay…the dining room at Adam’s house.”
I inhale, reminding myself to be patient with him. “That will do. You’re there with five other people.”
“Do I have to tell you who they are?”
“No…just picture those people. You
’re standing around talking.”
“I really don’t like to stand around and talk.”
Argh. I was starting to get a little hot under the collar. Gritting my teeth, I forced myself to relax. “Okay, you’re standing in Adam’s dining room with your hands in your pockets staring creepily at the other people in the room.”
Silence from him. Good. If he’d asked me another question, I would have lost it.
“Okay, now another five people walk into the room.”
“Do I know these people or are they strangers?”
Oh my goddess! I was going to stab him in the eye. “Does it matter?”
“It does to me.”
Of course he would say that. Calm, Jenna. You are in a wide-open field… “Okay…um…you know these people. Now there are ten people in the room.”
“Eleven.”
“What?” I almost shrieked in frustration.
“There are eleven people in the room. Me, plus the original five, that makes six. Then five more. Eleven.” He sounded supremely pleased with himself.
“Okay, whatever. Just focus, Wil. You’re in this room with eleven—I mean, ten other people. How do you feel?”
“I’m okay. The dining room is big. It’s not crowded.”
At last we were getting somewhere. “All right. Now ten more people walk in. There are now…” I fumbled to figure it out.
“Twenty-one—”
“Twenty-one people in the room.”
He hesitated. “The room is starting to feel full.”
“Good…now focus. I want you to breathe.”
“I have been. I’d pass out if I didn’t.” Or he’d pass out from me clobbering him, which I was kind of wanting to do.
“No, breathe in the special way, the good way—”
“The right way?”
“Yeah, picture yourself in this room with these twenty-one other people…”
“Twenty other people.”
“You just told me there were twenty-one people in the room.” Fuck, this was starting to sound like an Abbot and Costello comedy routine.
“There are. Me and twenty other people.”
For The One (Gaming The System Book 5) Page 16