by Karen Rock
But glancing around the resort’s lobby, she took a moment to imagine what planning a wedding there would be like. The large fireplace in the corner where several guests sat reading, the elegantly decorated Christmas tree near the window, the open-beam ceilings and the glistening chandeliers would all make a lovely backdrop for a small, intimate ceremony. It was beautiful inside the resort and suddenly she wished she were there for a different kind of holiday—one with a special someone...or a family, she thought as she watched a couple with their two children carrying hot chocolate and sleds out of the lodge toward the snow hill.
Ever since she was a little girl she had longed for a traditional Christmas surrounded by family and friends. She’d only ever experienced a real Christmas once...
“I’m sorry, Ms. Chase, but the entire lodge is booked until the fourth of January.” Noelle, the front desk clerk, interrupted her thoughts and brought her back to the present.
“Nothing, huh?” she said, disappointed. She’d been hoping to switch rooms. The sound of Liam next door was driving her crazy. The mere thought of him so close yet so far would surely ruin any chance she had of enjoying the rest of this vacation.
Noelle checked the system again. “Well, one of the honeymoon suites just—”
“No!” She shook her head wildly. “No...that’s fine, thank you,” she murmured. The last thing she wanted was to spend the holidays in a romantic honeymoon suite. That would only remind her of how alone she was. She backed away from the desk, and straight into...
Liam.
“Trying to get away from me, huh?” he asked with a smug expression.
“Doesn’t really seem to be working,” she mumbled. “Excuse me.” She moved around him. He couldn’t possibly think that she would be happy about their current situation. The last time she’d seen him was Christmas eight years before and being forced together at the same time of year was too much.
“Are you still so upset that you can’t even talk to me?” he asked from behind her, sounding genuinely confused, as though he couldn’t understand why his casual acceptance of all of this might annoy her. Had his feelings for her disappeared so completely over the years that seeing her now didn’t have an effect on him?
How nice for him. She wasn’t lucky enough to have the same peace of mind. But of course, his feelings hadn’t been as strong as hers. He’d only been using her.
“Am I still mad?” She pretended to think. “No. But you did walk out on me without an explanation after I proposed eight years ago...” She swallowed a lump of embarrassment as she forced her voice to remain steady. “So I’m not sure what you’re expecting from me.”
He was silent, staring at her, and then he shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe a chance to talk about what happened. Start over?”
Ha! “Unless we can somehow go back eight years, I think that ship has sailed.” She glanced around the lobby of the resort. “Look, it’s a big resort and I’m only stranded here until the day after Christmas. I’m sure we can avoid one another easily enough for four days.” The man she remembered loved winter sports, so she expected he would spend most of his vacation outside on the slopes. She hadn’t skied in years and this wouldn’t be the vacation to pick up the sport again.
Instead, she would get a head start on the work piling up for the new year.
She was still working hard and he was still playing.
Unfortunately, he looked disappointed. “Avoid one another?”
She nodded, her heart pounding at the unexpected sound of longing in his voice. “I think that’s best, don’t you?” She held her breath as she waited for him to agree with her.
“No,” he said instead, staring at the floor for a second before raising his gaze to hers once more, sadness reflecting in his eyes. “And I can’t promise that I’ll try very hard.”
* * *
WATCHING ALEX STORM away was a sight he’d seen often enough, but one he could never get used to. His gut had twisted at the sight of her, and her words only made things worse. She wanted to avoid him. She wasn’t interested in getting to know him again or spending time together. She’d tried to get her room changed just so she wouldn’t have to hear him next door.
That hurt.
Had he been stupid to think that maybe she would be happy to see him? Then again, why would she be? He’d hurt her. He’d left her on Christmas Eve eight years ago because he hadn’t believed in what they had together. Hadn’t believed that her love for him was enough to solve the issues facing their relationship. Hadn’t felt worthy of that love. Even though she’d put her heart on the line with her awkward, untimely marriage proposal... The memory of it haunted him more often than it should after all this time.
He knew he’d done the right thing saying no back then. He’d been a dumb jock, only interested in playing football and having a good time. He hadn’t had a backup plan for his future. Alex deserved a life like the one she was used to living, the one she was working hard to build for herself. So he’d walked away.
Waking up that Christmas morning so long ago, the overwhelming sensation of having messed up the best part of his life had crushed him. And even now...especially now, after seeing her again, he knew that he would do anything to get her back. He may have been immature, young and stupid back then, but his feelings for her had been real. What they’d had had been real.
He’d known she was different than the other girls he’d dated from the very first time she’d tried to avoid him. A day he replayed in his mind far too often...
“Hey, Alex!” he’d called as she walked right past him in the hallway outside the third law class that day that she hadn’t been teaching.
She kept walking.
“Alexis.” He tried again, chasing after her through the massive rush of students hurrying to their next class.
She stopped, but when she saw it was him, she continued—quickly.
Wow. What had he said at the party to annoy her so much? He thought girls liked to be complimented. Not this one apparently. And admittedly, he’d never had to physically chase a girl before. He caught her arm just outside the last classroom on the right. Room 206: Psychology and the Law.
He glanced at his own schedule again. Not one of his classes. “Hi,” he said.
“I’m late for class,” she said.
“No you’re not. You’re six minutes early.”
“Teaching assistants are supposed to be in class ten minutes early to set up.”
“Right. About that.” He held out his schedule. “Look, six law classes—six in the last two days—and you haven’t been in any of them.” And if he was going to coast through college on his athletic ability and not his academic skills, he needed to choose less difficult electives. He hadn’t understood a word any of his professors had said in two days.
She smiled when she saw the courses. “Those are first-year classes. I’m teaching third year.”
Third year? Seriously? “You could have mentioned that, Miss Smarty-pants.” Of all the things he’d ever done to get close to a girl, this had to be the dumbest. But he’d sensed the other night that she’d never give him the time of day otherwise. He’d met her a few times over the years and he’d always been curious about her. She seemed to go out of her way to avoid him, and he often thought that maybe she saw him as a dumb jock who wasn’t worth her time. She’d actually made him wish he were more than that. She was gorgeous and kind and had the most amazing smile...until he said something to her. Then she always found an excuse to run away.
“Drop the courses,” she said with a shrug. “Anyway, I have to go.”
“What if I don’t want to drop them?” he asked, moving to rest his arm against the classroom door frame, blocking her path. He didn’t want to let her go, afraid it might be days before he could get her attention again. Not that he really had it now. “What if I f
ind law fascinating?”
“Do you?”
“The law of attraction interests me,” he said with his best smile.
She frowned, as though she’d thought he was serious.
Man, this girl may be smart, but she really didn’t get the concept of flirting. Which made her that much more tempting. She seemed completely unaware of the effect she was having on him with her light blue eyes and long dark hair, her perfect, smooth skin and delicious-looking lips. He dragged his gaze away from them reluctantly and said, “I was kidding.”
“Oh. Okay, then.” Ducking under his arm, she went inside the classroom and he was forced to move as other students entered.
“Tutor me,” he said quickly.
She turned and cocked her head to the side. “Just drop the courses. I’m sure there’s still space in first-year weight lifting,” she said, before leaving him standing openmouthed in the hallway, more determined than ever to take the classes and convince her to help him.
He drilled Julie for information about her friend’s favorite coffee, favorite snack, her favorite books and where she liked to study. Before the second week of classes was over, he’d stalked and harassed her so much that she’d finally given in and agreed to tutor him.
And for the first time in his life, he hadn’t wanted to let someone down.
But then he had let her down—in the worst way. And it didn’t appear that eight years had been long enough for her to forgive him.
* * *
ALEXIS COULDN’T REMEMBER the last time she’d dreamed of Liam. At first, after they’d ended things, the dreams were nightly occurrences, but over time, the memories of him had started to fade, making the dreams less vivid, less detailed, until finally they’d stopped altogether. Yet that night at the lodge she tossed and turned, images of him flashing behind her closed lids as she tried to sleep. Over the years, she’d been successful in pushing him to the back of her mind and the bottom of her heart, but now the feelings she’d once had were barreling back, knocking the wind from her chest.
She lay awake in the dark, staring out the window at the snow-covered Adirondack Mountains in the distance.
She’d done the right thing years ago moving on and trying to forget him instead of fighting for him, hadn’t she? If so, why was she feeling such huge regret that so much time had passed without a word from him, without a glimpse of him. Certainly not without thoughts of him. And now it felt as though it was too late for them to even try starting over. Maybe if what they’d shared hadn’t been so intense, hadn’t felt so real, it might be possible to be...what? Friends?
Rolling over onto her side, she hugged her pillow and struggled with a memory that seemed determined to resurface.
When she’d woken up the morning after he’d left her—Christmas morning—her eyes were swollen from crying and her heart weighed heavy in her chest. She’d felt as if she had no choice but to let him walk away. In the four months they’d been together, things had gotten out of hand. Her neat, predictable, safe life had been turned upside down by the handsome football player headed for a career in the NFL.
Months before she would write the LSAT exam, she’d taken a much-needed break from studying, working hard and pleasing everyone. She had been living her life for her...and him. And abandoning her goals, even for just a few months, had nearly cost her the future she’d been working toward.
This future. The one she was living now.
The one he hadn’t wanted to be a part of.
* * *
THE INCESSANT BEEPING of an alarm clock woke her. Momentarily forgetting where she was, Alexis quickly tossed the bedsheets aside and swung her legs to the side of the bed.
Taking in her surroundings, she paused. Right. She was at Mirror Lake Lodge, not home in LA. Not late for work. She glanced at the silent clock on her bedside table as the one in Liam’s room continued to buzz loud enough to wake half the resort: 6:07.
She groaned, flopping back down onto the bed. Seriously, Liam? It had taken her most of the night to fall asleep, and now she was being woken up at the crack of dawn. She peered through one narrowed eye and glanced outside. Not even—it was still dark outside.
She waited for the noise to stop.
Any second now...
Oh, for God’s sake, Liam. How did he not hear it?
She pulled her pillow around her ears. So far, this vacation felt more like a twisted version of A Christmas Carol with all three annoying ghosts being played by the same person. Liam had certainly haunted her past, he was haunting her present and he no doubt would find a way to haunt her future.
When the noise didn’t stop after another full minute, she got out of bed and swung open the door to her room. That alarm had to be disturbing more than just her. She couldn’t be the only person trying to sleep in. Marching the three feet to his room, she banged on his door and waited, hands on her hips, until she remembered she wore only a thin tank top and shorts. She folded her arms across her chest.
And continued to wait.
He didn’t answer and the alarm clock continued to wail.
Leaning closer to the door, she listened carefully. Was he even in there?
The door opened and she stumbled forward, right into his bare, wet chest.
“Good morning,” he said with a smile.
She fought to keep her angry gaze locked with his and not let her eyes drift elsewhere, but it was a challenge. “It would be if someone’s alarm wasn’t waking the dead.”
He rushed to turn it off and once again she averted her eyes from the sight of him in a towel. She’d seen more of his bare torso in the past twenty-four hours than she had any man’s body in a very long time. And this body in particular hardly played fair.
“Sorry about that. I woke up and was in the shower before it went off. Just heard it the same time I heard you knock.”
How was it possible that he’d woken up before the alarm? At home, she had three alarm clocks in case she slept through the first two. “Whatever,” she mumbled. The noise had stopped, that was all she’d wanted. Turning, she walked back to her room.
The door was locked. Of course.
No one ever remembered to take a key with them when they stormed out of their hotel room to reprimand another guest.
“Locked out, huh?” Liam leaned against his bedroom door frame, arms folded, an amused look on his face.
She sighed.
“Guess that’s what happens when you don’t think things through completely.”
Did he want her to kick him in the nuts? She glared at him.
“I’d offer to let you use my phone to call down for a new key, but you did say that you’d prefer to avoid me.”
She pushed past him into his room. “Don’t be a jerk,” she said, picking up the phone and dialing zero for the front desk. “Hi...Yes, this is Ms. Chase from room 204...I locked myself out. Yes...That would be great, thank you,” she said, replacing the phone.
When she turned, Liam was staring at her. “What?”
He shook his head, his expression soft, which threw her off guard completely. “Just trying to commit this image of you to memory,” he said. She felt her knees buckle slightly.
Time to leave. Time to get back to avoiding him. Next time, even if the room was on fire, she wouldn’t be knocking on the door.
“Thanks for the phone and the early wake-up call,” she mumbled, moving past him out into the hall.
“You can wait in here for your key.”
“That’s okay. It won’t be long.” She leaned against the wall to wait, staring straight ahead, her cheeks reddening as she felt his eyes still on her.
“Well, if you need—”
“I won’t,” she cut him off. She didn’t need anything from him. She didn’t want anything from him. She just needed and wante
d to go back to sleep without thoughts or images of him—or the real thing —keeping her awake.
* * *
HIS PLAN HAD WORKED.
As he closed the room door, he couldn’t help the smile spreading across his face. Alex had never been a morning person, and apparently that hadn’t changed.
He felt a little guilty about waking her up so early on her vacation, but he was determined to prove that avoiding him wasn’t going to be an option, and he was off to a good start.
An hour later, as he glided effortlessly down the ski slopes, the snow blowing in his face, he couldn’t erase the image of her grumpy, sleepy face when she’d knocked on his door. Still as beautiful as ever, even first thing in the morning and ready to tear his head from his shoulders.
There had been many women in his life since Alexis, including one he’d considered marrying, but he’d yet to feel the same connection with anyone as he had with Alex. Maybe he hadn’t fully realized what they’d had back then, but he’d certainly realized his mistake once it was gone.
He wondered if the same was true for her. Was that why she’d never settled down and gotten married?
As he reached the bottom of the hill, which was busy now as families started their day of winter activities, he wondered how she would be spending her time at the resort. She didn’t ski and she’d never been a fan of the cold weather—she’d moved to LA as soon as she’d graduated Harvard Law School. According to Julie, she rarely visited her family home in Connecticut, and never in winter. So, outdoor activities didn’t seem probable. If he wanted to make sure he ran into her, he’d have to think of something else.
He doubted she would be with Julie. He hadn’t seen his cousin since she’d called off the wedding. She was either in hiding or spending time with Austin.
As he removed his skis, he noticed the sign for the resort’s spa on the side of the building. He smiled. He’d bet his sporting-goods-store chain that she would be there. She’d seemed so tense and stressed every time he’d seen her so far. Admittedly, he was probably part of the reason for that, but she did need to relax.