by J. H. Croix
“Ooh, yummy,” she said with a smile at Ginger.
Ginger nodded emphatically. “The coffee here is awesome. You should order something to eat too, but let’s wait for Delia.”
As if conjured by her name, Delia walked through the door and glanced around, giving a small wave when she saw them. Delia Hamilton was the chef and manager at the lodge restaurant and was married to Garrett Hamilton, whom Ivy had met briefly. Garrett was one of Gage’s brothers and a partial owner of the ski lodge with the rest of their siblings. When Ivy had first met Garrett, she’d been surprised to learn he was married to Delia. He was a former corporate lawyer and gave off an aura of sharp intellect and persistence. Ivy imagined she’d want to be on his side in the courtroom. Delia with her honey blonde hair, warm blue eyes and soft personality threaded with the steel of being a single mother for years had seemed an odd fit for Garrett. Then, Ivy saw them together. The connection between them burned so brightly, Ivy sometimes felt like she must be interrupting a highly intimate moment, yet that’s how they always felt, so she’d gotten used to it.
Ginger chatted with someone who was passing by the table, while Ivy took a moment to scan the view. She wasn’t sure she’d ever get accustomed to the fact that everywhere she turned here offered a postcard perfect view. Misty Mountain was close to the bay and offered a clear view of the harbor across the highway. Boats bobbed in the choppy waters. The mountains were obscured by the clouds and the soft snow falling. Ginger had assured Ivy spring would actually arrive in the next month, but she genuinely enjoyed the winter, so she didn’t mind the snow. After she’d gotten accepted into her engineering program, she’d missed the mountains and snow of Utah where she’d been raised. California was lovely, but she preferred the contrasts of seasons.
Delia made her way to them and sat down with a sigh. “So good to be here!” She took a long swallow of her coffee and smiled slowly. “You know the best part about being a chef?”
“What?” Ivy and Ginger asked in unison.
“Having someone else serve me,” Delia said emphatically. “I love cooking, but I do it so much that it’s nice when someone else magically makes coffee for me.”
“It’s not magic,” Ginger said dryly.
Delia laughed softly. “Feels like it. Anyway, what’s up?”
“Let’s see, work is nuts and I can’t wait for spring. Cam promised me he’d build flowerbeds for me this year, so I’m impatient,” Ginger said.
“Oh, where are you going to put them?” Delia asked.
“On the bluff side. We get the most sun there.”
Delia turned to Ivy. “What about you? Feeling settled in yet?”
Ivy shrugged. “As much as I can. I know Ginger and Cam say they don’t mind me being there, but it’ll be good when…”
Ginger cut her off. “Would you stop it? We love having you here. You can stay as long as you’d like. Cam doesn’t say much about it, but I can tell it means a lot to him. I never met your brother, but I know it was really hard on Cam when Eric died and you being there for him meant the world.” Ginger’s eyes teared up a little when she reached over to squeeze Ivy’s hand quickly. “Family means so much to him, so don’t you dare feel like you’re in the way. I’m beside myself to see how happy it’s made him to have you here.”
Ivy was startled at Ginger’s exclamation, and it must’ve shown on her face. Delia glanced between them. “It’s easy to miss with Ginger because she’s usually sarcastic, but she’s super loyal, and friends and family are everything to her. So it’s great you’re here.”
Ivy’s chest felt a little tight. Her family had been close growing up, but the life of ski competition meant lots of travel for Cam and Eric before Eric died. She’d taken a semester off to be with her parents and Cam in the aftermath, but life and her studies had taken her away again. She was thrilled to be where Cam was. Their parents had been visiting Cam here several times a year, so she knew they’d see them even more now because they wouldn’t have to split their time between visits to her and Cam separately.
“It’s awesome to be here,” Ivy finally replied. “Speaking of Cam, I should be thanking you because it wasn’t until he met you that he finally seemed back to himself. Eric’s death hit him hard. I mean, they spent years together traveling and skiing. I can’t tell you how happy I was when I saw him with you. His old spark came back.”
Ginger’s emotional exclamation passed when she rolled her eyes. “Fine, fine. It’s only because I’m not bowled over by him. He’s such a ski god, I always have to make sure he remembers he’s human. The gossip when he moved here was awful, all kinds of women drooling over him.”
Ivy choked on her coffee and took the napkin Delia handed her to wipe her chin. “I know, right? You should’ve seen what it was like when he was competing. Obviously, I don’t look at him that way, but he had groupies.”
Ginger shook her head. “I’ll bet.”
Delia turned to Ivy. “Speaking of gossip, Owen has sparked plenty of speculation around here. He’s all dark and mysterious and almost never shows his face around town. It’s a damn miracle he’s actually eaten at the lodge restaurant a few times recently.”
Ivy couldn’t help it and flushed straight through. Ginger snorted a laugh, but didn’t say a word. Delia’s assessing eyes bounced from Ginger to Ivy. “Well, it’s obvious there’s something there with you two. I might not have had a chance to sit down and eat when you were there with him, but the man can hardly keep his eyes off of you. What’s up?”
Ivy crossed and uncrossed her legs and considered how to reply. Before she had a chance, Ginger spoke up. “It’s safe to say they have a thing going on. Owen’s totally hot for Ivy and her for him. As for where things are going, maybe she’ll fill us in.”
Ginger’s sly gaze swung to Ivy. Ivy took a deep breath and shrugged. “I guess there’s a thing, but…”
Ginger cut in again. “Of course there’s a thing! You spent the night with him twice. Unless it was with someone else and you didn’t tell me about it.” She arched a brow.
Delia’s shoulders shook with her laughter, while Ivy blushed wildly. “No, I haven’t been busy with two men if that’s what you wondering,” Ivy finally managed. “As for what’s going on, I don’t know how to explain it. We, uh… Well, there’s something there, so something happened. I don’t know where it’s going, or what to do now.”
Ivy chewed on the inside of her mouth and looked between Delia and Ginger, hoping perhaps they could help her figure out how to interpret the situation. Ginger cocked her head to the side. “Okay, maybe I’m slow here, but you spent the night with him, so I’m guessing something actually happened. You know, like sex?”
Ivy wouldn’t have thought it possible, but her face got even hotter. She managed to roll her eyes. “Yes, sex.”
Ginger rolled her eyes right back. “Okay, so is this just a sex thing? Or have you talked about something else?”
“That’s the thing. We did talk. I don’t want complications at work and neither does he, so we figured we’d get each other out of our systems. It doesn’t seem to be working though.” Ivy heard her words and almost burst out laughing. She sounded so cosmopolitan—as if she’d done something like this before. Maybe that was the problem. She was in so far over her head, she didn’t know what to expect. Maybe this deepening intensity, the intimacy that threaded between them, stitching tighter and tighter every time they were together, maybe it would rise and fall before it dissipated.
Delia took a sip of coffee, her gaze thoughtful. “What do you mean it doesn’t seem to be working?”
Ivy threw her hands up and let them fall. “Just that. The, the… oh I don’t know what to call it!”
“I think you mean raging lust,” Ginger added helpfully.
Ivy threw a balled up napkin at her. “Whatever you want to call it. It’s not going away. Actually, it’s getting worse.”
“Define worse,” Ginger said with a sly grin.
Delia turned
to her. “Stop teasing. You’re not going to make her spell out the details here.”
Ivy grinned at Delia. “Thanks for the back up.”
“No problem. Back to what you were saying, were you looking for advice or support?” Delia asked.
Ivy met Delia’s warm blue gaze and pondered her simple question. “Both?”
Delia grinned. “Okay, let’s start with advice. Usually I get stressed out when I don’t know what to do, especially when it’s something to do with relationships.”
“Okay, what should I do?”
Ginger’s sly manner disappeared. “The first thing to ask yourself is what do you want?”
Ivy sipped her coffee and considered Ginger’s question. Before she actually allowed herself to get skin to skin with Owen, she’d have said she merely wanted a chance to actually experience the wild, thrumming desire with him. But that was back when she had no clue. Their chemistry and the resulting connection were like a self-replicating force. Almost like the battery project—every time they tamped down the flame, it fed back into itself, charging and recharging with no end in sight. Aside from the spectacular failure of their silly plan, she hadn’t anticipated the growing intimacy she felt with him.
Owen held himself at a distance, yet it was clear he cared deeply about others. He portrayed himself as a man who was driven solely by his passion and belief in creating sustainable energy. The tragic death that spurred him was never mentioned. Whenever she thought about his parents dying, her heart ached. Joan and Derek had given her bits and pieces that fleshed out the man she was coming to know. He was incredibly loyal to the staff who had followed him since he started Off the Grid. He was quiet and reserved, yet his actions were crystal clear. The company’s generous pay and health benefits were legendary. Everything about Off the Grid was family friendly, yet Owen had no family to speak of. As much as she didn’t know if she had the right to want more from him, it bothered her to see and feel the walls he kept around his heart. As she sat there pondering what she wanted, she realized it might be too late for her to try to make a reasoned choice about this. Owen had slipped right into her heart without even trying.
She gulped her coffee and glanced between Ginger and Delia. “I think I’m in trouble.”
Hours later, Ivy tucked her hands in her coat and stared out over the bay. After she’d come to the startling realization about just how much Owen was coming to mean to her, Ginger and Delia had tried to offer some advice, yet Ivy had merely shaken her head. The glaringly obvious problem was that Owen had made it abundantly clear he wasn’t interested in more than whatever it was they were doing. She tried to cling to the burgeoning intimacy between them, but she sensed that very factor might be what was driving him to pull back from her.
After they’d gotten home from coffee, Ivy headed out for a walk on the beach. Ginger and Cam’s home was on a bluff overlooking the bay with a winding path down to the beach through trees and a few rocky areas. Ivy gulped in the salty air, savoring the refreshing chill, and wondered what the hell to do now. She sensed it would be an utter disaster to tell Owen anything about how she was feeling. Why, oh why, did she have to go and fall for him? She couldn’t help but think she’d have had heaps more sense about the whole thing if she’d ever done anything other than go on a few random dates here and there. She might’ve recognized the potential contained in the sparks between her and Owen and known to steer clear. Instead, she’d been stupid enough to think she could handle herself without getting hurt—as if she could juggle hot embers in her bare hands.
She resumed walking, her eyes traveling along the beach, which offered a plethora of colorful rocks mixed in with the pebbled gray stones. She paused to pick up a deep red rock, surprised at its lightness. Turning it over in her hands, she guessed it must be a lava rock. She spun to look out over the water again and wondered if Mount Augustine was the source of this small rock. With Alaska situated in the famed Ring of Fire, there were six active volcanoes in the vicinity. Although Mount Augustine was the closest possibility, this small, gorgeous rock could’ve come from any volcano nearby with the tides sending it rolling through the ocean to land.
She tucked the lava rock in her pocket and continued along the beach. Gulls called, a few eagles flew above and the wind kept gusting. She could smell the hint of spring to come with the air softening the slightest bit. The walk settled her nerves, but she didn’t manage to get her mind off of Owen. By the time she turned back, she came to the conclusion she needed to tell Owen they should try to take a break. She had enough sense to know she couldn’t snuff out her desire for him, but maybe she could get it to quiet down if they didn’t keep fanning the flames.
Chapter 15
Owen stalked into his office and slammed the door, the glass rattling slightly. He strode to the windows and stared blindly over the view. His heart was banging inside his chest and he felt sick. Ivy had told him she wanted to talk this morning. He’d been stupid enough to agree, thinking perhaps she wanted to discuss a few details on the battery project. No, instead she’d said she thought maybe they should try to return to keeping things platonic. He could tell she must’ve practiced what she was going to say because she rushed through it. He’d been too stunned to do anything other than nod. He’d had a conference call lined up right after that and then jumped into a meeting with Derek. He’d barely been able to concentrate. It was so bad, Derek had finally just told him to leave. Derek had enough sense not to give him grief, but Owen had seen the look in his eyes.
His chest was tight and he wanted to storm into her office and demand she reconsider. He wasn’t ready for… For what? You told her this was sex only, a way to get this out of your system. She’s respecting that, so why are you so upset? It shouldn’t matter. But it fucking does! It’s not just sex. It’s so much more and you know it. What the hell are you going to do about it?
Owen kicked the steel beam running through the center of the windows and spun away. He’d completely underestimated this thing with Ivy. He needed to stop calling it a thing. The connection between them had its own force. Sex was only one part of it and everything else fed the fire burning between them—her brilliance, her shared passion for their work, her basic kindness, and her occasionally sly humor. He was in thrall to her and could hardly stand the idea of trying to keep things platonic. Yet, the depth of his feelings for her terrified him at his core. He couldn’t stand the idea of letting someone mean so much to him. He didn’t know if it was already too late, but perhaps she had a point. Maybe if they let things cool down, the intensity between them would fade.
Another kick to the steel beam and he forced himself to get to work. He’d turn to what helped save him after his parents died—work. He’d pour himself into it and keep his distance from Ivy.
Ivy was making her way back to the trail that wound up the bluff behind Ginger and Cam’s house after another long, chilly walk on the beach. She’d found herself meandering down here with frequency ever since she’d dredged up the nerve to tell Owen she thought they should try to get back to a platonic state. The conversation had been stilted and horrible, and she’d been swinging between regret and relief ever since. Regret because it almost physically pained her to sever the intimate connection between them, and relief because her heart was nearly aching for him and everything she knew she could never have with him.
Long walks early in the morning and before darkness fell gave her a bracing shock to her system. It didn’t help get her mind off of Owen, but then nothing did. Her phone vibrated in her pocket, and she paused to tug it out, answering without bothering to look at the screen.
“Hello?”
“Ah, Ivy. Glad you took my call.”
Dr. Parkhurst’s nasally voice sent a cold chill down her spine and dread clenching in her gut. She was so startled, she froze for a second, unfortunately giving him a chance to speak again. Once he began speaking, she decided to listen if only to get a sense of what he was after with these calls.
“L
ook, I’m starting to understand you seem to have genuinely misunderstood my actions. I stayed out of the way because HR told me to. Now that you’re no longer employed here, I think it’s high time we cleared this up. If you insist on pursuing your formal complaint, I’ll have no choice but to sue you for defamation of character. I don’t mean to sound threatening, but just as you have a right to protect yourself, so do I. I was hoping we could talk and straighten this out. I’ve been in touch with Owen Manning, and I’m sure he would appreciate a visit from me to Off the Grid. We could set up a time to meet when I’m there and clear this whole thing up.”
Ivy’s heart was pounding in a fear-fueled rhythm, and she swallowed against the bile rising in her throat. She’d been so stupid to think she could rid herself of Dr. Parkhurst. She stood there with the cold ocean breeze gusting against her cheeks and couldn’t find a word to say. Yet, she knew she couldn’t stand to hear his voice anymore, so she hung up on him and quickly went into her phone settings to block his number. She had enough sense to know he’d probably try again from a different number, but she would make sure to check who was calling before answering and not take any calls from unfamiliar numbers.
She remained where she was, looking out over the water. The snow was gradually receding from the mountains across the bay, the white line marking its end crawling upward day by day. It had snowed again the other day, and Cam warned her to expect a few more late winter and early spring snowstorms, but she could sense spring coming. It was present in the quickening sense of air around her. She took several slow breaths, trying to calm the sick feeling in her stomach and chase the fear away.