by A. L Long
I should have never pushed him. I should have tried harder to pull him up instead of watching him fall. I hated him for what he said. My mother didn't leave me. She overdosed on whatever drug she was using. I remembered shaking her to wake her up. She never did. I always stayed near her. Kept her warm. Nothing helped. When the pounding on the apartment door began with the yelling, "I know you're in there, bitch. Where's my money you fucking cunt?" I tried blocking it out by putting my hands over my ears. Eventually the banging stopped, but I knew they would be back. They always came back. Only the last time, it wasn't them.
"Stop! Stop! Please don't take me away from my mommy," I yelled out. I tried to forget. It was always the same. First his eyes, then my mom's. Shaking my head to clear out the demons, I pushed myself from the bed and headed to the bathroom for a much-needed shower. Lathering my body with soap, I tried to picture something other than the thought of my nightmare. I tried to focus on the only person who could make me happy, the only person who could tame the demons. Looking down, I could see the erection that was surging between my legs. Gripping my shaft, I imagined Lilly's lips wrapped around me, stroking my dick with her warm mouth. I could feel the tip of her tongue tease the head of my cock while she sucked, pulling me deeper inside. My movements began to increase, seeing only Lilly's head move up and down as I thrust deeper and deeper inside her sweet mouth. My head fell back as I moaned, "Fuck," wishing she was with me now as I came with needed fury, covering the shower wall with my release.
After my scene in the shower, it was hard for me to concentrate on anything but Lilly, which only led to another hard-on. I needed to hear her voice. Taking my cell from the nightstand, I dialed her number and waited for her to answer.
"Hello," she said.
"Hey, baby. I just needed to hear your voice," I said like a love-struck teenager. "How did things go at the foster home?"
"Good, I guess. I found out that my brother died when he was fifteen. He fell from the tree house they used to have in the back yard at the foster home. The person I talked to didn't know much about it other than some older boy tried to save him."
"Did they say anything about the older boy?" I asked, hesitantly.
"No. They didn't have any information on him. The couple that ran the home when it happened were no longer around, and they didn't have any information on where they went."
"I'm sorry, baby. At least you know what happened to him," I said.
"Yeah, I just wished I knew more about him and what he was like," Lilly said softly. "I found out where he was buried. I'm going to visit the cemetery this afternoon."
"Be sure that Cop goes with you," I ordered.
"Okay," she replied softly.
Everything in my heart told me I needed to tell her the truth about her brother. I just couldn't though. As much as it pained me to hear the sadness in her voice, I knew it would kill her if I told her what really happened. I only wished I were there to comfort her.
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
Lilly
After talking with Peter, I was beginning to miss him more and more. It had been less than twenty-four hours since I had seen him, but my body was beginning to have “Peter withdrawal” symptoms. I couldn't even concentrate at work without thinking about him. Brie was scheduled to come in at one o'clock, which only gave me a couple of hours to get done what I needed to before I left for the Peaceful Grove Cemetery where my brother was buried.
Staring at my computer, I began to think about my real mom. It occurred to me that she didn't know that he was dead. As far as she knew, he was still alive leading his own life. I wasn't even sure how to get in touch with her. Thinking about what Peter said about her just taking off, I decided to check with the manager at the motel she was staying at first. Hopefully there was a chance she may have left information as to where she was headed in case someone came looking for her.
Once Brie arrived, it didn't take me long to gather my things and head out. Cop was already waiting for me. As he helped me get into his truck, I tried to get in as gracefully as possible without showing too much of my backside, since I was wearing a skirt. I wished I had suggested he drive my car instead of his F250. I settled in the seat as he rounded the front and got in. Fastening my seatbelt, I looked over to him. "Can we make a quick pit stop before we head to the cemetery?"
"Not a problem. Where do you want me to take you?" Cop asked, easing his truck from the curb.
"I want to go to the motel where my mom was staying," I said.
Cop looked over to me with one of those looks that I recognized right away. It was the same look Peter gave me when he was trying to hide something. "Do you have a problem with that?" I asked, trying to gauge his reaction.
"No, ma'am," he said.
The minute Cop put the truck into park, I was out and on my way across the parking lot of the motel to the main office. I didn't care that my skirt slid up my legs, revealing the strap of the garter holding up my silk stockings. Before I could close the door to the truck, Cop was beside me.
"I think it would be better if you waited in the truck while I talked to the motel manager,” he said sternly.
"Don't be silly. This will only take a minute. Nothing is going to happen to me between now and then," I said, noticing the uneasiness in his voice.
"I really need to insist, Lilly," he said forcefully, as he stepped in front of me, blocking my view of the office.
"What is this about, Cop?" I asked, beginning to feel the onset of anger approaching.
Looking over his shoulder, I couldn't believe what I was seeing. My mom was walking up the steps to her room. She hadn't left. She was still here. Pushing Cop aside, I headed towards her.
"Wait, Lilly," Cop said behind me.
Turning my body, I gave him one of my signature “piss off” looks. By the time I reached the stairs, my mom was already in her room. Climbing the steps as quickly as I could in four-inch heels, I could only think about how pissed I was that Peter lied to me. From where I was standing, I could see Cop, who was now pacing the length of his truck with his hands raking through his thick brown hair. He knew he'd been caught. He was just as guilty as Peter, as far as I was concerned.
Reaching my mom's room, I knocked lightly on the door. When she didn't answer, I yelled, "I know you're in there, Mom. Open the door."
When the door opened, I saw the face of a woman who had no intention of putting her life back together. Her pupils were the size of marbles and her face was flushed. Pushing past her, I entered her room only to find a piece of aluminum in the shape of a spoon with a candle sitting beside it. Whatever was inside was gone. There was only a light brown residue left on the bottom.
"I thought you left?" I asked coldly.
"You aren't supposed to be here, Lillabell. That man of yours was supposed to convince you that I left," she said. "I told him I would keep my mouth shut."
"What are you talking about?" I questioned her confused.
"Your brother and how he really died."
"You know about that?"
"Yeah, and so does your boyfriend. After all, he was there."
I wasn't sure if I could believe what I was hearing. She was so strung out on drugs, she wasn't making any sense. "You aren't making any sense."
I watched with confusion as she walked to the night stand, grabbed the pack of cigarettes, and took one out. With shaky hands, she lit the cigarette and took in a deep breath. "Your boyfriend, that Peter fella, he was there when Adam died. They said your brother slipped and fell from that tree house and that Peter couldn't pull him up. Lies, all lies," she hissed, puffing her cigarette.
"What do you mean, Peter was there?" I asked.
"Ask your boyfriend. I've already said too much."
I watched with disbelief as she headed to the bathroom and closed the door. I couldn't believe that Peter would know Adam. How could he? I mean, what were the chances? Even though I didn't know about Peter's childhood, I knew he was a good person. Yes, he had his secr
ets, but this, this couldn't be true.
Leaving her room, I headed back to the truck where Cop was standing. My emotions were all over the place. Cop knew something was up. Looking him straight in the eye, I asked, "Did you know she was still here?"
Shaking his head and looking off to his right, unable to face me, he nodded, saying, "Yeah."
~****~
The ride to Peaceful Groves Cemetery was the longest ride I had ever taken in silence. I was so angry with Peter for lying to me that I didn't have any words to share with Cop. I knew Cop was only doing his job, but he should have said something the minute I asked him to take me to the motel.
I had no idea where my brother was buried, so I had Cop pull up to the groundskeeper’s office to see if someone could let me know. The groundskeeper handed me a map of the cemetery and showed me where my brother was buried. He said that it wouldn't be hard to find since it was the only plot in that section that didn't have a headstone.
Cop pulled around to the north side of the cemetery to section 'G.' I opened the door and got out of the truck holding on to my skirt as I slid off the seat. Just like the groundskeeper said, there was no headstone where my brother was laid to rest. It made me sad to see that the only marker to show who was buried there was a small piece of metal with his name, Adam Lee Walker, with the date he was born and the date that he died. Kneeling before the plate, I brushed my hand across it. "I'm so sorry that I didn't get a chance to know you, big brother. I bet you would have been the best."
It was beginning to get dark. Cop came up behind me and placed his hand on my shoulder. When I looked up at him, I knew it was time to go. Being in a cemetery after dark was probably not a very good idea. Pushing myself to my feet, I said goodbye to my brother, promising him that people would know who he was. Before leaving for the city, I had Cop stop at the shop across the street that made headstones for the cemetery. I wanted my brother to have more than just a piece of metal embedded in the ground. I wanted everyone to know who he was. By the time I left, Adam had a new headstone made of gray granite. Written on the front were the words, "He lies in peace with no more sorrow, dearly missed always, today and tomorrow."
~****~
When we got back to the condo, Cop took his place outside my door with no word. After thinking about what Diana said on the way home, I had to find out if it was actually true. Certainly there would have been something said about it. Changing into my most comfortable pajamas, I poured myself a glass of wine and headed back to my room with my laptop. I had a pretty good idea of the time frame I needed to search for since the date Adam passed away was on the plaque where he was buried. I typed in several keywords to see if anything would come up. I got several links on the first try. Evidently the death of a child was pretty big news back then. Clicking on the link, a picture appeared of a boy who couldn't have been more than fifteen years old. He had the same eyes as me, but his hair was much darker and he looked to be on the chunky side. Just by looking at him, I could tell that we might have had different fathers. At least now, I knew what my brother looked like. I right-clicked on the photo and saved his picture in my picture folder
Scrolling down, I began to read the story relating to his death. The article stated that he and a friend were in the tree house that was built the year before by some of the boys of the home. The article mostly talked about the background of the foster home and how it came to be through donations. It housed ten boys which were supervised by four adults. The deeper I got into the article, the more it talked about the accident. There were reports that Adam slipped from the edge and another boy who was in the tree house tried to pull him up, but was unable to. There was also a witness report that stated he heard two boys arguing and when he looked over the fence to see what all the commotion was about, he saw Adam falling from the tree with another boy looking down on him as he fell.
There was no other information on the accident. When I got down to the bottom of the page, there was another picture. This time it was a group picture with the names underneath. From left to right, I began reading the names, Benjamin Wilson, Nathan Oliver, Adam Walker, Tommy Morgan, Peter Hewitt… My heart fell into my stomach as I looked at the picture matching the name with the boy. It was Peter. Even though he was a lot thinner and younger then, there was no mistaking it was him. He lived in the same foster home as my brother. He lied. He lied about my mother leaving. He lied about knowing my brother. Slamming the lid down on my computer, tears began filling my eyes. No wonder Peter didn’t want to talk about his past. What really happened in that tree house?
The night filtered into morning and my eyes were wide open. Every time I tried to close them, I saw Peter and then I saw the sad face of my brother. All I could think about was how scared he must have been when he fell from that tree house. Who in their right mind would allow the boys to build it so high off the ground in the first place? It had to have been at least two stories high.
Knowing it was no use trying to fall asleep; I pushed from the bed and headed to the kitchen. Turing on the coffee maker, I sat on the barstool and watched as the amber liquid filled the pot. I wasn't sure if it was the lack of sleep or the fact that I was falling for a liar that had me numb. I couldn't stand the way I was feeling any longer. Heading to my room, I changed into my workout clothes, turned off the coffee maker, and headed out of the door, only to be stopped by Cop.
"Is there some place you need me to take you?" he asked, like it was no big deal.
"No,” I said rudely. "I think you have done about enough."
"I can't let you leave by yourself, Lilly," he declared.
"I don't care. I'm going to the gym." I didn't wait for his response. I was totally over him and Peter, and especially the alpha-male bullshit.
The air was a little bit chillier than normal, making me wish I’d grabbed my light jacket. Needing to warm up, I began jogging at an even pace. On cue, Cop was right behind me. I thought it was funny watching him jog in heavy boots and jeans. Pushing myself a little harder, I turned my jog into a run as I rounded the corner. Turning my head, Cop was no longer behind me. This was my chance. Instead of ducking inside the gym, I decided to keep going. As I rounded the next corner, I waited for a moment to catch my breath and to see if Cop would appear. Yep, he was gone. I was no longer cold. I slowed back down to a jogging pace and crossed the street. This was the first time in a long time that I actually had time to myself. With Cop camped outside my door and Peter breathing down my neck, I felt like my life was no longer my own.
I was only a few blocks away from Central Park. I thought it would be a good place to clear my head. I began jogging towards my favorite spot in the park. It was near Turtle Pond. Turning the corner to head that way, I should have been watching where I was going. Before I knew it, I was on the ground looking up at a muscular form wearing only shorts. The sun was blocking my view, so I couldn't see much of anything else. It was only after a hand stretched out and helped me to my feet that I realized who was helping me.
"Pierre," I said, shocked.
"Lilly. It seems we keep running into each other," he said, smirking.
"Yeah, well, I won’t let it happen again," I said, pulling myself from his embrace.
"It doesn't have to be that way, Lilly," he admitted.
"I know what you did to me. I know about the other girls too."
"I would never do anything to hurt you, Lilly. As I remember, you were more than willing to take what I was giving you," he clarified.
"I wasn't myself, I.... Oh my God. Did you drug me?" I asked, knowing it was more than the wine that made me do what I did.
"Of course not, Lilly. I don't have to drug a woman to get her to fall into bed with me," he said, looking insulted by my accusation.
"Stay away from me, Pierre," I hissed, turning the other way in order to get away from him.
"I know what you think, Lilly. I would never hurt you." I heard him yelling behind me.
CHAPTER TWENTY FOUR
Lill
y
I hadn't heard from Peter in three days. There were so many times that I wanted to pick up the phone and call him, but my anger kept me from doing just that. I was certain that he knew I found out about him lying to me about my mom. Even though he was right about her not wanting to help herself, it still didn't make it right that he lied to me about her taking off. What hurt even more was the fact that he lied about knowing my brother as well. Something happened that day in the tree house. I wanted to know what he was hiding. Tossing my feeling aside, I dialed his number and waited for him to answer. Only he never did. The call went straight to voice mail.