Under Pressure (Dossier #3)

by Cathryn Fox

  Lovemaking?

  I never thought so before, but everything in his touch, in the way he looks at me, is so deeply caring that I can’t help but wonder.

  “This what you wanted, Reese?” he asks, his voice so deep I hardly recognize it. “To feel me like this? No barriers. Just you and me.”

  “Yes, it feels so good.”

  “Yeah, it fucking does.” With a heavy breath, he lowers his head and captures my nipple. I swallow against the pleasure. His muscles flex as he powers into me, and I’m so lost in him I say, “Cole, I love…”

  I pause, and my lids flash open as I catch myself.

  “What do you love?” he asks, his deep-blue eyes drilling into me, and for a minute I fear he can see right into my soul. Then again, this is Cole, so maybe he can.

  “I love this,” I say quickly to cover my near slip, but when I see something in his eyes, something I thought I spotted that day we were cage diving, my heart misses a beat. Is it possible that he feels more, too? Do I dare hope that what we’re doing here really is making love? Even if it is, though, how could we possibly make it work? We live on opposite sides of the country, and I’d never ask him to give up what he loves, or try to change him. Then again, I could move. Yeah, all my family and work are in New York. But Cole isn’t. Who’s to say he’d want me there, anyway? I pinch my eyes shut, my heart a confused mess.

  He moves faster, penetrating deeper, creating a friction that has my inner muscles spasming and my thoughts spiraling out of control. Pleasure gathers and comes to a peak.

  “I feel you,” he whispers. “You’re tightening around my cock, and it feels so fucking good, baby.”

  Every muscle in my body begins convulsing, as I shut my eyes and come all over his cock. My body trembles, shakes, and shudders as I moan in complete bliss.

  “Fuuuck,” he murmurs into my mouth. “You are so hot.”

  He slams into me, once, twice, then stills, spurting his hot cum high inside me. I squeeze around him, not wanting to lose a drop. He buries his face in my neck, his deep rhythmic breaths scorching my flesh as he pants. We both breathe together, cocooned against each other, and after a moment he lifts his head, his gaze meeting mine. One big hand goes to my hair, and he leans close, smoothing it from my forehead. Another soft kiss brushes my lips, warm, sensual…soul-stirring. My heart pounds so hard with the love I feel for him, I’m sure he can feel it.

  “Did that work?” he asks, as his lips continue to brush gently over mine.

  “Did what work?”

  He grins. “Did all that kissing, and, you know, the sex and orgasms help distract you from the storm?”

  “Storm?” is all I can manage to say, my post-orgasm brain still not working.

  He laughs and falls into the bed beside me. “Guess so. We’ll have to remember this game, Reesey Piecey.”

  Game?

  Oh, right, I asked him to play a game with me. So, this wasn’t lovemaking, after all.

  It was just a sexy distraction.

  Chapter Eight

  Cole

  Sitting in the cramped airplane as we approach the JFK runway, I steal a glance at Reese, and my heart squeezes so tight I can barely breathe.

  She loves me.

  I know her better than she knows herself, and I’ve been so goddamn caught up in my thoughts, so worried about losing her, that I haven’t been thinking clearly. But what I realized last night as we lost ourselves in each other is that little Reesey Piecey fucking loves me.

  She fucking loves me.

  And now I finally get it. She’s pushing me away on purpose. I love her for it. I really do. I love that she thinks she’s doing what is best for me. But what she doesn’t understand is just how much I love her, too, and nothing is more important to me than being with her, taking care of her, making her happy.

  After she’d told me to leave, she said she didn’t want to talk about it anymore. Fine, I won’t talk about it, but I damn well plan to show her what she means to me, because no fucking way am I walking away from this without a fight. I plan to win, and the only way I’m going down is if she’s beneath me.

  During the long flight, I thought through everything that had happened over the last week, and the whole damn time I couldn’t seem to wipe the stupid grin off my face. From the seat beside me, Reese kept casting curious glances my way. She probably thought I was excited about getting home so I could head back to Colorado. But this adventure, and me tagging along with her, had to be about getting the two of us together. Whoever set it up had to know how we felt about each other. Heck, I watched the shark dive video this morning when packing, and anyone who looks at us can surely see what we feel for each other. It’s in the way we gaze at each other, in our body language.

  I just need to figure out a way to show her how much I care, and how she is way more important to me than some job in Colorado, and that I really came home because I couldn’t stay away for one more agonizing minute.

  Can I make her believe that?

  After we land, we exit the plane and make our way to our luggage. As we stand there waiting, Reese yawns and my phone pings. I rub my tired eyes and read the text from my brother, who’s coming home next week for his high school reunion. Deciding to respond later, I shove my phone into my pocket, grab our luggage from the carousel, and follow Reese out into the dark night.

  I hail a cab and climb in beside her. She’s been so quiet, so out of sorts, that all I want to do is pull her into my arms and tell her everything will be all right. At least, I hope it will be. I hope the plan I’ve been mulling over will make everything right between us. If it doesn’t, well… Nope. Stop. Not even going there. It has to work. Simple as that.

  I give the cabbie Reese’s address, and when he finally pulls up to her condo, I open my door. She touches my hand to stop me.

  “It’s okay. I’ve got this.”

  “So do I.”

  “Cole, I can take care of myself,” she says.

  “I know you can. But if you think I’m letting you out on the sidewalk in the middle of the night, you don’t know me at all. Now, come on. I am walking you to your door.”

  “Fine,” she says. “Bossy much?” she adds under her breath.

  I ignore the jibe because I know she’s trying so hard to show me her independence so that I won’t worry about her. I do know she can take care of herself. But goddammit, I want to take care of her. In fact, I want us to take care of each other, rely on each other, like two people who love each other should do.

  I grab her luggage and follow her up the steps to her place. She unlocks the door and stands there for a second like she’s not sure what to do next. Coming to her rescue, I drop a soft kiss onto the top of her head. “Night,” I say.

  She spins around. “Cole.”

  “Yeah?”

  She goes quiet for a long time, shifting from one foot to the other. “Hate you.”

  I can’t help but grin. “I know.”

  Chapter Nine

  Reese

  One long week has passed since we arrived home, and I’ve been going to work like a zombie and locking myself into my condo at night, wallowing in my own misery. Why did I think I could have sex with Cole and still be friends?

  Stupid, stupid girl.

  I look at my suitcase, which is still lying on the floor in the front entrance. I haven’t even emptied it or washed the clothes that have Cole’s scent on them. Oh, God, how could I have messed things up so badly?

  Forcing myself up from the sofa and away from the ice cream that has become my best friend over the last week, I pad across the room and unzip the suitcase. The shark diving video falls out.

  “How the heck did this get in my bag?”

  Okay, great, now I’m talking to myself. I’m in worse shape than I thought. I shake my head and look at the disc. Maybe the laundry could wait. I walk over to the DVD, pop the disc in, and reach for my ice cream as I plunk back down on my comfy sofa.

  When Cole comes into vie
w, my heart races. I watch the way he takes care of me, holds me in his arms when the shark comes close. Yeah, and that’s the reason I had to send him away. I’m not his responsibility, for God’s sake. The man has a life to live, one that doesn’t revolve around his chickenshit friend.

  But when the camera zooms in on us, and I once again see something in Cole’s eyes, something that resembles want and desire, my heart punches into my throat. I grab the remote and rewind to the beginning of the scene, sure I’m seeing things again. But no. There it is, caught on camera. In my heart, I can tell the way he is looking at me goes well beyond friendship. If I didn’t know better, I’d say he was looking at me with love in his eyes. Not friendship love, but real love. The kind of love between two people who always put the other’s best interests first.

  Holy shit.

  I drop the spoonful of ice cream and jump up, my pulse pounding so hard in my neck I think I might pass out. Just then my phone pings and I run to it. Please be Cole.

  My heart sinks when I see the text from my friend Kennedy.

  Hey, what’s up?

  My fingers fly over the screen.

  Not much, you?

  I’m in town to visit the family. Saw Cole at the airport.

  Oh, God, he’s leaving. He’s really leaving. But why wouldn’t he? I told him to go away and that I didn’t want to discuss it anymore. Then again, why was he so damn happy on the plane? I thought it was because he was going to be heading back to Colorado soon. Now I just don’t get it.

  I mentally curse myself for being cruel. What if there really is more going on between us? I should have opened up, told him the truth. I can’t let him go without doing that, without learning what he wants. I really should have told him how I felt, but I was too worried about our friendship, what was best for him. Maybe I had it all wrong.

  I quickly text back.

  Kennedy, I have to go.

  Wait, you didn’t tell me about your trip.

  With time of the utmost importance, I can’t give details, so I tell her, we’ll meet for coffee later.

  One thing, did you and Cole finally do it? :)

  Oh. My. God.

  What? I text back.

  Come on, Reese. This is me. I know you. Why do you think I sent him on the trip with you?

  You set the trip up?

  Yeah, I picked your name.

  I shake my head, hardly able to believe this.

  And you sent Cole because you thought I wanted to ‘do it’ with him?

  Uh, yeah! And he wants to do it with you, too, so I knew it was time for you two to get together. You did get together, right?

  Yes, I text back and grab my purse. I have no idea what time his fight leaves—I’ll check that in the cab—but right now I don’t have a minute to waste.

  I run to the front door, quickly lock it behind me, and race down the stairs so fast I nearly trip and land on my face. As I wobble and grab the rail to balance myself, a strong arm goes around my waist. I’m about to say thanks when I realize who’s holding me.

  “Where are you off to in such a hurry?”

  “I…” I look past his shoulder and see a cab with the door still open. “I thought…”

  Stormy blue eyes lock on mine. “You thought what?”

  I choke back a big fat tear and burst out with, “I thought you’d left. Kennedy said she saw you at the airport.”

  He arches a brow, his grin playful. “And…you were coming after me?”

  I point to my condo. “The video…I saw…Cole…” I put my arms around him and lay my cheek against this chest. I don’t finish what I want to say because there is still some small part of me that isn’t sure what he feels.

  He holds me to him, and my heart fills with love as his powerful heart beats against my face. I take a moment to breathe in his scent and take comfort in his strength, in the way he’s always been there to catch me. “I don’t want to lose you,” I say. “I don’t want to wreck what we have between us. I couldn’t handle it if we weren’t friends anymore.”

  Or more…so much more.

  “What makes you think you’re going to lose me, or that you’ve wrecked things?”

  “I told you to go away. That I didn’t need you here.”

  “Yeah, and that’s why we can’t be friends anymore, Reese.”

  My heart misses a beat, and I try hard not to lose it in front of Cole. I nod like I totally understand and pull my face from his chest, doing my best not to cry.

  He cups my chin and lifts it until we’re eye to eye. “Reese,” he says, “I thought I’d fucked everything up between us, but then I realized something very important.”

  “You did? What?”

  “Come with me, and I’ll show you.” He guides me to the cab, and I slide in. He gives the cabbie directions to a place in Queens, and I just give him a strange look.

  “You want to show me something in Queens?”

  “You’ll see,” he says.

  I mainly sit in quiet. We both do, as the driver takes us all the way to Queens. I want to open up to Cole, tell him everything, but I don’t want to do it in front of the cabbie. A long while later, the cab stops in front of an older home—cute, but very run down.

  “What are we doing here?” I ask.

  Cole slides from the cab, and I follow him out. I glance up and down the street and see kids and dogs at a nearby park. “Do you know someone who lives here?”

  “Yes.”

  Who?”

  “Me,” he answers.

  My eyes go wide. “What are you talking about?”

  “I bought this.” He shrugs one shoulder. “Thought I could fix it up. Working construction with my uncle hasn’t been so bad after all. I learned a few things.”

  I shake my head. This is all coming at me so fast. “Cole, that’s amazing. But Colorado… I…”

  He puts his hands on my shoulders and turns me. “See the garage?”

  I nod.

  “That would make a great clinic for you.” I blink at him and try to process what he’s saying. “There’s lots of space in the backyard, too. We could build that shelter, Bed and Barkfest.” He glances up and down the street. “Outside the city, across from a park. Perfect location, don’t you think? Took me all week to find it.”

  With my thoughts still two pages behind, I shake my head and ask, “Cole what are you saying?”

  “Remember I said I realized something?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Well, what I realized was that you love me.”

  “I do love you,” I blurt out, unable to hold it in for one more second. “I didn’t know how to tell you. I was so worried about losing you as a friend.”

  “I’ve loved you for a long time, but I didn’t realize our friendship went so much deeper until our trip to Africa,” he says, his voice low and soft. “I guess that’s why I was so miserable when you were with Jared that I couldn’t stay here, couldn’t watch you two together.”

  “You…you love me?”

  He laughs. “Fuck yeah, I love you. And that’s why we can’t go back to being just friends. When you told me to go away, it nearly killed me. But after making love to you that last night in the hotel, I realized what you were doing.”

  He loves me.

  My heart soars as my entire body trembles with happiness. When I’m able to breathe again, I say, “Cole,” as a tear falls down my cheek. I sniff, and he wipes it away.

  “Hey, why are you crying?”

  “I’m just…” My throat is so tight it’s hard to get the words out. “I can’t believe this is what you’ve been doing for the last week. When Kennedy said she saw you at the airport, I was so scared I’d lost you forever.”

  “I was at the airport because I had to pick up my brother. He’s home for his upcoming high school reunion. I’ll probably put him to work on the house while he’s here.

  At the mention of the house, I stiffen. Wait, I can’t let Cole stay here, working in a job he hates. “What about Colora
do and your work? You love it so much.”

  “Sure, it’s great. It’s a once in a lifetime adventure, and I’ve done it hundreds of times.” He pulls me in tighter. “But the only adventure I want now is with you.” He wags his finger between the two of us. “This is the once in a lifetime that I want, Reese. And it’s time I started my own company.”

  “You always talked about that.”

  “I’ve been researching. Lots of opportunities for guides on the Hudson River.”

  I wriggle closer to him, and he drops a tender, slow, excruciatingly intimate kiss on my mouth. When he pulls back, I say, “What will you do in the off-season? There’s not as much to do here as there is in Colorado. Will you be bored if you’re not involved in some kind of adventure?”

  “Bored? Hardly. And every day will be a new adventure taking care of our little ones.”

  I grin and nod toward the backyard where he wants to build Bed and Barkfest. “You mean our rescue dogs?”

  His blue eyes soften as they race over my face. “No, Reese,” he says, his thumb brushing my cheek so softly it turns me inside out. “I mean our kids. I want you to marry me. Have a family with me.”

  My heart misses a beat. He wants to marry me. Have a family with me. “Cole.”

  “Oh, and just so you know, I want a whole litter of little ones.”

  I laugh, and he laughs with me. “That’s a lot of kids, Cole.”

  “Yup, and I’ll be their stay-at-home daddy for the better part of the year.” He dips his head, and his lips close over mine. His kiss is imbued with so much love I’m sure my heart is going to explode.

  “Cole?”

  He inches back and looks at me, his grin crooked. “What? Still hate me?”

  I laugh, everything between us so perfect that it’s hard to explain what I’m feeling. Instead of trying, I say, “I love you.”

  His smile widens. “Yeah, I know, and it’s damn well time you told me that!”

  I whack him and can’t help but laugh. “God, I hate you.”

  He laughs with me. “Hate you, too.”

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