“You mean the drama he made up?” she retorted, shaking her head.
“Yeah.”
She let out a deep sigh. “I feel like the biggest idiot and a terrible friend.”
I nodded. “Don’t let it eat you up too much. Some people get joy out of manipulating others, and I think that’s the case with Todd.”
“Guess so. Tanya is so sweet. She hasn’t brought it up since.”
I smiled and drew a slow breath, trying to calm my nerves. I didn’t know what I expected tonight with Walker.
“And I heard Todd has been looking for another job,” she informed me.
Laughing, I replied, “Couldn’t hurt him to do that.”
Staci nodded. “You said that it happened to you once.”
I nodded.
“Was it recent?”
My lips turned into a thin line, and a shiver ran through me.
“No, it was a long time ago.” I shrugged. “A really long time ago.”
“Still stings?”
My eyes connected with hers. “It does.”
“I just feel awful about accusing her of that.”
“All you can do is stay in it and find ways to show her that you know she’d never do that and that you’re sorry.”
“Totally.” She grabbed her coat from the closet behind the small bar. “Need anything else tonight? I’m bushed. All I want is to go home and crawl under my comforter.”
“No, I’m good.” I smiled and watched Staci nearly skip out of the restaurant.
I chuckled and walked over, locking the door behind her.
I loved my job, but I don’t remember the last time I skipped anywhere. I glanced out the window and saw Staci climb into her car and pull out of the parking lot.
It was nearly eleven and no sign of Walker.
I groaned in complete annoyance at myself for believing he would show up. I wandered to the kitchen and wiped down the stainless steel counters one more time before hanging up my apron on a hook.
What did I expect from Walker?
An apology?
A confession?
An alibi?
I let out a heavy sigh and grabbed my bag out of the closet to fish out the keys for the restaurant. Quickly punching the code into the alarm system, I dashed out the door and locked it behind me.
“Harmony.”
I nearly jumped out of my skin as I turned around to see Walker Malone sitting on the outdoor patio we’d yet to open for the summer.
He’d brought a small table and chairs. Two candles lit the area just enough to see that he’d brought dinner, and he’d managed to pull over one of our heaters.
“Wow.” I glanced at the table and back at Walker. “I wasn’t expecting to see you tonight.”
“I told you I’d see you later.”
I nodded and sucked in a breath, not wanting to add that I’d heard that before, only to be disappointed.
“This is really unexpected.” I smiled as Walker walked over and pulled out one of the chairs for me.
I took a seat, and he placed a chenille throw over my lap.
“You’ve thought of everything.” I smiled, unsure of his intentions.
“I thought you could use a dinner that someone else cooked for you.” He lifted the lid on my plate, and I smiled.
I couldn’t help but smile.
It was the first meal he’d ever cooked for me.
I was fifteen, and he was seventeen, trying to prove a point.
That point was that I had a gift.
I stared down at the fried Spam, hominy, and burned hash browns.
I laughed. “This looks every bit as good as it did then.”
“Is that a good thing or a bad thing?” His laughter made the night air sweet and comforting.
“Good. Very good.” I grinned as he took a seat across from me and removed the lid on his dish as well. “You even remembered the ketchup.”
“Of course.” He handed me the bottle, which I generously squirted on my hash browns. “I changed up the drink selection, but other than that . . .”
He poured us both a glass of wine.
“I’m surprised you even remembered this.” I took a bite of the crispy hash browns.
“I remember everything.” His voice lowered.
“I doubt that,” I chided.
“You’d be surprised.”
I laughed and nodded. “Yeah. I would.”
“Try me.” His grin only widened as I took a bite of the spam.
“What did you fill my bag with after trick or treating in sixth grade when I left the room?” My brows rose as I watched him take a deep breath. “I got you on the first question, huh?”
Walker shook his head, his eyes narrowing on mine. “I filled your bag with a hundred hearts that I’d cut out and stuffed in your pillowcase that you were using as your trick or treat bag because you were too cool to have a plastic pumpkin.”
I swallowed down a lump that had suddenly appeared.
“That was an easy one. Give me something harder.” He took a bite of Spam and made a funny face.
“You haven’t had canned meat in a while?” I teased. “How about homecoming, freshman year? You told me to go with Josh, the stoner, because you were busy. Why?”
He shifted across from me and drew a breath. “Boy, you do have a good memory.”
“For some things.” I finished the last bite of Spam.
“I thought if you went with Josh and saw what an idiot he was, you’d think I was a better option.”
I shook my head. “When did I ever give you the impression that you weren’t my only option?”
“Never.” He drew a breath and let it out slowly. “Listen, we were young and full of crazy emotion.”
“What if it wasn’t crazy?” I asked, my voice nearly a whisper.
He licked his lips and took a sip of wine. “Love is crazy. I didn’t really know it at the time.”
I laughed softly and shook my head. “Love isn’t crazy. Not the kind of love I imagine.”
“What kind of love do you imagine?” Walker cocked his head slightly.
“Infinite love. A love that never dies, never runs away, never causes pain . . .” I pushed my mouth into a frown, realizing everything I’d just said could never be what Walker Malone was capable of.
I took a couple of sips of my wine and let out a sigh.
“If only love were that easy.” Walker poured more wine into my glass.
“It should be.”
He shook his head. “A complicated love doesn’t make it less of an emotion.”
“I’m looking for easy. You asked what kind of love I imagined, and that’s it.”
His expression fell slightly, but he didn’t let on.
“Walker, why are you here?”
“I needed an escape.”
“No, I mean tonight. What is it you want from me?”
“I wanted to see you again.”
“Only because you ran into me on Fireweed. It’s not like you’ve ever reached out. I wasn’t hard to find.” I moved my hash browns on my plate. “You’re only curious because I’m easy, or at least you think I’m easy.”
“That’s not true at all.” Walker shook his head. “I’ve always thought about you. Wondered how you were. Imagined what your life was like reaching your goals. Curious whether you ever thought about me.”
I nodded. “Not that curious or you would have asked me.”
“And how would I have done that? Do you honestly want me to believe that if I’d reached out, you would have responded? I think we both know you would have ignored me.”
He was right. I would have ignored him.
I shrugged. “I owe you a lot. You gave me the freedom to pursue my dreams. You convinced me that I had it in me to choose my own path. I didn’t have to follow my parents’ dreams for me. I could cultivate my own. I thank you for giving me that courage.”
Walker shook his head as his beautiful blue eyes locked on mine. “I didn’t g
ive you that courage, Harmony. You were bubbling over with strength and courage long before I cooked you burned Spam and frozen hash browns to prove a point. But freedom?”
I drew a breath. “You left me, and I rose to the occasion. I didn’t have to be bogged down by relationship drama. You left and I dealt with it. I moved on and went after my dreams.”
“And never gave me a second thought?” he prodded.
“Not in the beginning.” I took another sip of wine. “The only way I survived that kind of pain was to forget about you. To follow my dreams and erase you from them.”
Walker ran his fingers along his jawline and whistled. “Harsh.”
“If you think that’s harsh, you have no idea what I went through over the years.” I narrowed my eyes at Walker.
“And I’m sorry about that. I know you didn’t sleep—”
I interrupted him and held up my hand. “You didn’t seem to know when it counted.”
“You’re right.” He nodded. “I was a fool.”
“You were young.”
“And I threw away the best thing I’d ever had in my life.”
I laughed and shook my head. “If only that were true.”
“It is.”
“Walker, seeing you has been a real trip, and I’m not sure it’s been a good one.”
His eyes darkened a shade, and I felt the swirl of emotions nearly eat me alive. I wasn’t only lying to Walker. I was lying to myself.
Since Walker wandered onto Fireweed Island, I’d started chasing memories.
Happy memories.
Sad memories.
And all those bits in between.
“Is there anything I can do to make things better?” he asked. “I’ve changed, Harmony. I’m sure you have too.”
I looked into the empty parking lot and let out a silent sigh.
I wanted to believe I’d changed. I even fled to this tiny island with the hope of starting fresh, ridding myself of bad habits and even worse choices.
And now one of my worst habits was sitting in front of me.
“Let me imagine love how I want.” I stood, fighting every emotion in me to run over to him and pretend like he’d never deserted me, like he’d never destroyed me. “And that doesn’t include being broken into a million pieces for a second time.”
As I started to walk away, Walker stood and reached for my wrist.
I could have pulled away, but I didn’t.
I let Walker Malone pull me into his arms and kiss me.
His lips pressed to mine, and every nerve in my body ignited with the familiarity I craved. I knew walking away from Walker Malone was going to be the hardest thing I ever did in my life, but I had to have love my way, not his.
I didn’t need crazy, painful love. I needed soft and warm love.
But as his kisses deepened and I felt the strength of Walker’s arms around me, my mind played a terrible trick on me and let me believe in Walker’s kind of love.
Chapter Ten
“You kissed Walker?” Shannon’s eyes widened in surprise.
“Technically, he kissed me,” I corrected.
“Yeah, but you kissed him back.”
I laughed and rolled my eyes. “It was a weak moment.”
I took a sip of iced tea and sat on the bench overlooking the ferry dock.
“I feel crazy.” I sighed. “Like I’m just setting myself up for more heartbreak.”
“You might be.” She nodded. “Or it could work. You never know.”
“He’s only here temporarily, and I know Walker Malone. He’ll get bored.”
Kindness etched Shannon’s features. “Is that what happened before? He got bored?”
I shrugged. “Something like that.”
“Did he cheat on you?”
I shook my head and stared at the ferry chugging toward Seattle. The Puget Sound glistened in the spring sunshine as the ferry made its path to the hustle and bustle of city life.
I suddenly missed it—my escape.
Bringing my gaze back to Shannon’s, I shook my head. “No. He didn’t cheat. Not in the normal sense. He just took off and never came back.”
“Did he ever say why?” she asked gently.
“He didn’t have to. I know why.” I nodded and stretched my legs in front of me.
The weather had turned just warm enough to wear shorts, and my very pale legs were screaming for some sunshine.
“And why was that?” Shannon asked.
I let out a heavy sigh.
The whole thing was something I hated to think about. It wasn’t just about Walker and me dissolving into nothingness. The entire circumstance spoke volumes about perceptions, and apparently, Walker’s opinion of me.
“It’s complicated.” I twisted my lips into a pout.
“Good thing today is my day off,” Shannon tried again.
“Fine.” I glanced sideways at Shannon as she watched me carefully, and I turned to stare at the Sound. “My parents loved that I was their perfect little concert violinist. I was on track to go to college on a full-ride scholarship.”
“Wow.” Shannon looked impressed.
“Yeah. And it wasn’t that they couldn’t afford to send me. They were the kind of parents who had a savings account set up for every possible life contingency.”
“I’m impressed.”
I laughed. “It is pretty impressive. Until recently, my savings account was between the couch cushions.”
Shannon chuckled.
“Anyway, my parents wanted me to go to college, go to law school, and partner with my father, who was our small town’s one and only attorney.” I smiled and shook my head. “The only problem was that I hated the idea. I didn’t want to become an attorney. I wanted to do something creative.”
“Like violin?” she prompted.
“Believe it or not, no. I liked to cook,” I confessed. “From the time I was like five.”
“Five? Really?” She laughed.
“Yup. Believe it or not, I could make a mean marinara sauce by ten.”
She chuckled. “I believe it, but what does that have to do with Walker?”
“He’s the one who showed me that I didn’t have to do what my parents wanted. He was older than me, and a bad boy.”
“Not much has changed, I see.” She rolled her eyes.
“Probably not,” I agreed. “So, we started hanging out when we were young. He was in junior high. I kind of picked up on his having a crush on me.”
“Wow.”
I smiled, remembering the excitement of falling for Walker. Even then, he was cute and charming. “By the time we were in high school, things had changed from friends to so much more.”
Shannon nodded, and I stared at the emptiness of the Sound. “My parents hated that I was spending every waking minute with Walker. They hated even more that he was in a different crowd from what they wanted for me. It didn’t take long before I gave up the violin.”
“I bet your parents were pissed about that.” Her brows raised.
“Beyond, but Walker insisted that I do what I want to do. So, I took early entrance exams and got into a technical college for culinary arts. My parents were livid, but it was the best decision of my life.”
Shannon laughed. “You’ve always been an overachiever, then?”
“Hardly.”
“A concert violinist and then college while in high school? I was lucky to get out of high school.”
I smiled. “If it hadn’t been for Walker, I probably would be at my dad’s law firm, wishing I could escape.”
“Instead, you escaped to Fireweed . . .” Shannon pointed out.
“Yeah. I wonder when I’ll stop running.”
“I still don’t understand what this has to do with Walker walking out on you.”
“My final year of culinary school, I was nineteen. I had three weeks left of courses. I was the top in my program with tons of offers once I graduated.” As I awoke the beast of painful memories, my breath caught in m
y throat. “I’d worked so hard and put my education first. I’d even put my relationship with Walker on semi-hold. It didn’t make him happy.”
“Twenty-something men aren’t always the most patient,” she agreed.
I nodded. “Well, I was getting so much attention that it made a few other students mad, and they started a vicious rumor.”
“Are you serious?” Shannon asked.
“Yeah. They said I was sleeping with a married professor. He was a chef two towns over with a popular restaurant. He was also one of the people who’d tried to recruit me for after the program.”
“Walker believed the rumors,” Shannon stated, not even bothering to ask.
“Sure did.” I shook my head. “I never heard from him again.”
“Until now.”
“Exactly.” I let out a sigh. “The chef wound up getting divorced. His wife believed the students too.”
“Wow.” Shannon’s expression hardened. “Rumors can be so wicked.”
I nodded. “I don’t know if this is the better part or the worst part, but one of the students, several years later, was doing an interview and the reporter brought up our school scandal. She confessed that it wasn’t true.” I shrugged. “But it was too late.”
“That’s brutal.” She shook her head.
“I felt so bad for my teacher. He loved his wife with all his heart. Tried to win her back over the years, but it was too late. She’d found someone else and moved on by the time that article came out.”
“Meanwhile, you were left to put the pieces back together while Walker dazzled millions of women worldwide,” Shannon said sarcastically.
I chuckled. “Nothing would surprise me.”
“He never once asked you if it were true?”
I shook my head. “Which is why I think it was just his excuse to leave. I think he’d had his fill. We were both young, and it was silly of me to think anything would actually come of it.”
“I don’t believe you. You were in love with him.”
I smiled. “I credit him for where I am today. If we’d stayed tangled in some relationship, I doubt I would have experienced so much and gotten to where I am today.”
“Running a restaurant.”
“Exactly.”
A few minutes of silence passed between us as I took in the warm sea air. A lot had transpired over the years. I rarely spoke to my parents. They never came around to accepting my dreams. But they were satisfied and smug about the ending with Walker.
Imagining Love on Willow Road (Island County Series Book 13) Page 7