by Abigail Agar
Of course, that was something that Daisy had never experienced, which was just another thing for Mary to feel guilty about. Daisy only had her work uniform, as far as Mary knew. “Oh, y ... yes,” she stammered. “I guess I am just not quite myself today.”
Daisy did not push it. She could just tell that this was something her friend did not want to talk about. She watched her out of the corner of her eye instead, searching for a moment where she would look more approachable, but her expression remained closed off and sad all the way back home. Mary did not even make the effort to look out the window again; it was almost as if all she could see were her feet.
Mary barely even knew where she was anymore; a cold sensation had her gripped as her brain whirred rapidly. The choice that she had in front of her was becoming increasingly difficult with every passing second. It should have been simple; she did not love or even like Duke Edmund Smith, so she should not have to marry him, but that was not the way that the world worked.
Maybe I will end up like Charlotte after all. Maybe we are both destined to end up miserable and stuck.
What would her father think if he could see their sadness? Would that have caused him to change his mind? Maybe if he could see the terror in his eldest daughter’s eyes, he would help her to escape her marriage, even if that was unheard of. Maybe he would allow Mary the choice if that happened.
Why did you have to die, Father? she thought morosely in a way she had not done in years. All of this had dredged up the sadness and loss she felt that he was gone. It was as if the last five years had not even happened, and the funeral had only occurred the day before. I wish that you were still here, Father. I miss you a lot.
Once they pulled up outside the house, Mary felt washed out and ready for some alone time in her bedroom. She was upset that she had dragged Daisy along to the dressmakers with her when she had not spoken with her much, but she hoped that her friend would understand. All Mary needed was some time to think.
Unfortunately, that was not going to happen.
“Where have you been?” Walter snapped at her from just inside the front door. “I have been waiting for you for over thirty minutes.”
Mary resisted the urge to huff at his very unwelcome presence. This was the absolute last thing that she needed today. “I went to visit my dressmaker,” she told him coldly. “I was not aware that we had an appointment today.”
“We do not, but there are things that we must discuss, do you not think?” Walter pumped his fists by his side. He grew weary of Mary and her indecision, and it made him want to do something drastic just to punish her. “I have sent out the letter to the Duke, as discussed, but since we have not received a reply yet, I believe we need to start considering other options.”
A spark of hope filled Mary’s chest; this had to be a good sign that things were potentially looking up, did it not?
“I went to the dressmakers to get a garment made for me to attend some society functions,” Mary replied confidently. “So if His Grace does not see fit to reply, I can marry someone else. I shall still inherit the house then, shall I not?”
Walter scowled. “You have done that without discussing it with me?”
“I did not know I would have to discuss everything with you.” Mary felt stunned; this was not the reaction that she expected from him. She assumed he would be happy that she was not being difficult for him. “I apologise for stepping out of line.”
Walter shook his head as he tried his hardest to keep the string of expletives inside. “I do not see what choice we have. Like I have said to you before, your father was not specific about many details. Maybe that is something I should have pushed for when he was alive, but it is too late to worry about it now. We must just work with what we believe ourselves. I presume if Edmund does not respond to our communication, and if he does not wish to marry you, then I assume we can find another more suitable person for you.”
Mary nodded, waiting for happiness to surge through her. This was what she wanted, what she was hoping for, so why did she not feel better? Was it simply the moroseness she had been experiencing all day continuing, or was it something else?
“So let us talk; we need to plan exactly what we intend to do.” Walter returned to an ‘all business’ mode. “Now that everything has become much more complicated, we have to decide how to make this work. Do you not agree?”
“Yes,” Mary whispered. “I agree.”
Chapter 9
Edmund did not know how to feel as he stood outside Mary’s home for the second time. Coming to meet her again was never in his plans. When he left this house the previous time, it was under the assumption that he would not be coming back. Yet here he was, back again, on his mother’s command.
It might not be so bad, he tried his best to convince himself as his heart raced in his chest. Maybe this time, things will be very different.
Still he could not stop his stomach from churning; his pulse from racing, a thick anticipation flowing through his veins. Edmund could not place it, but there was a deep-seated fear within that did not come from the meeting that lay ahead of him. Could it have stemmed from the fact that he left last time in a hurry after not giving Lady Mary Roberts a fair chance? There had to be a reason he had not sent the letter declining to meet her again, after all. There needed to be a reason that he allowed his mother to convince him to come again ...
He stuffed his hands into his pockets and took in a couple of deep breaths. It could not hurt to at least see. After his disastrous experience at the ball with Lady Victoria Hartmon, nothing would seem quite as terrifying. Having her lurching at him, trying to ruin him as he ruined her was utterly scary. That was something that he never wanted to experience again for as long as he lived.
With a tremor racing through his system, Duke Edmund Smith extended his fist, and he knocked upon the heavy wooden door that would lead him into an unknown situation. Just because he had decided to see Mary again, did not necessarily mean that she wanted to see him. Maybe she had only agreed to the meeting because she felt that she had no choice in the matter. If Walter was involved like he always was, then she probably did not.
“Good morning, Your Grace,” Walter Thompson smiled brightly as the door swung open. After holding his breath fearfully for hours from the thought that Edmund would not stick to his promise and arrive, he was so pleased to see him standing there in front of him. He had even answered the door himself rather than leaving it to the butler because he simply could not wait. “It is wonderful to see you again. Please come inside.”
Edmund tipped his hat and stepped inside the home. He did all that he could to keep his expression stoic so Walter could not sense the nerves that were rolling off him in waves. At least Walter was happy to see him again. “Thank you kindly for inviting me. I am so glad to be back.”
As they walked towards the drawing room, where Edmund presumed that Mary was waiting for him, Walter asked him a stream of questions about business. Normally, this was the sort of thing that Edmund would love to discuss, but he could not seem to focus on it at all today. It was as if his head was everywhere else. He could not think about business deals and financial gain when the woman that, for some strange reason, terrified him, sat right behind those walls.
“So, Your Grace, what do you think?”
All of a sudden, Edmund realised that Walter had asked him a direct question and that he was being rude by not answering him. He shook his head slightly, trying to rid his brain of the constant stream of thoughts that raced through his mind, and he turned his head to look at Walter.
Just as he parted his lips to ask Walter to repeat himself, another voice broke through his thoughts, grabbing his attention in a completely new direction.
“Good morning, Your Grace,” a soft, female voice sent bolts of emotion darting into his heart. “It is lovely to see you again.”
His heart skipped a beat as he turned to see Mary. Her long blonde hair fell freely past her shoulders. It looked much nice
r hanging loose than it did tied up. Not that he did not like it that way, he simply preferred this more natural look. It was also obvious from her face that she had not painted it. This made her blue eyes sparkle more brightly, her skin appear fresher, and her whole face look more youthful and beautiful.
She is stunning, he thought as his eyes travelled down her body. I already knew that, but now I can really see it.
His eyes fell on the pale blue dress that cinched in at the waist tightly. Edmund did not know too much about the female form, but he was aware that a shape like that could only be created with a very tight fitting corset. As a fashion, he felt it was barbaric, but it was the trend to have that real hour-glass figure.
Edmund felt certain that Mary would look lovely even without the corset under her dress. She had a true, natural beauty that was incredibly rare. The last time he was at her house, he hardly bothered to notice her. Now, he could hardly notice anything else.
Compared to the Victoria’s of the world, Mary is truly incredible. She is so different. I have to admit, I like that about her.
She extended her hand, and he took it. As he leaned forward to press his lips against it, and he kissed her skin, there was no denying the flurry of excitement that flowed through his stomach. This time, he had come into Mary’s home with a much more open mind and heart, and that way was paying off.
Mary might have looked more natural to the outside world, but her mask was tied to her face just as tightly. She knew that she had to keep on smiling, that she needed to continue being charming, that she had to actually give this man a chance this time. She wanted to be smarter this time, to be more considerate. Everything that Daisy had told her flowed through her mind.
I am doing this for you, Daisy, she thought. I am giving Duke Smith another chance because of everything that you have said to me. And also because I do not want to lose your home and job.
As his lips connected with the sensitive skin on the back of her hand, her pulse raced faster. She felt her stomach turn over completely in an unexpected way, then butterflies started flapping their wings inside there. It was such a shock that she almost snatched her hand away; it took all of her restraint to keep it there.
Edmund’s eyes glanced up to meet hers, and a smile inadvertently spread across her lips. She had not noticed it before, but there was kindness behind that green; a true, sweet friendliness. When his lips turned up into a smile, dimples popped in his cheeks which made him seem even kinder.
Maybe you were right, Daisy, she decided as her eyes almost popped out of her head. Maybe there is more to the Duke than meets the eye.
“It is truly lovely to see you too,” he murmured, almost under his breath. “I am grateful that you allowed me to come again.”
She extended an arm, indicating towards the seats for him to sit. Before Edmund could take a step forward, Walter pushed past him to sit down first, wanting to remind the pair that he was the chaperone of the meeting. For a moment then, he felt pushed out which would not do. He had put a lot of time and energy into upholding this clause in William Roberts’ will. He needed the credit he deserved for that.
“Now, Your Grace, please tell me more about what is happening with your business.”
Edmund gave Walter some information about his international shipping company, but he did not go into full detail this time. There was something halting him from showing off, and he had a feeling it came from the blonde-haired, blue-eyed distraction in front of him. She sat with her hands in her lap, a smile playing on her lips and sweetness to her gaze. Edmund was not even sure that she was listening to him again, but it hardly mattered.
Maybe the eye roll that came last time was my fault. Maybe I brought it upon myself by being so boring.
“So, Mary,” he finally stopped himself from droning on before he caused yet another look of disdain. “Have you travelled much? I know a lot about the world from my work, but I am sad to say that I have not actually been to many places.”
Mary grinned at his self-deprecating comment. It was much nicer to hear about the things that he wanted to do and had not yet done, than all the things he was amazing at. “I am afraid to say that my eighteen years of life have only been spent in London.”
“Would you like to go to other places?”
Mary pondered this for a moment. She had not ever thought about travelling far; it was not anything that had ever occurred to her. Travel was not common, even among the wealthiest of people, but now that Edmund had mentioned it, she figured it would be nice to see more of the world ... or even the country. London was such a small place in the grand scale of things.
“Maybe I would,” she finally answered cheerfully. “Maybe there are other places I would like to see.”
Walter flicked his eyes between the pair, wondering what was happening. This was so different from the last time he had sat in a room with Lady Mary Roberts and Duke Edmund Smith. The frostiness had gone, so had the tension. It felt so much easier. He did not quite know what to make of it; he was not sure that this was going as he planned.
“I have not been anywhere either,” he interjected unnecessarily as if all he wanted was the attention on him. “Except to the countryside, of course. I have been there a lot. On business mostly, so I guess I have not seen too much of it, but that hardly matters, does it? It is all about going to these places ...”
But Mary and Edmund were barely listening to the gentleman. They were staring intently at one another, trying to make out their own feelings. Neither of them was sure what had changed and why. They had gone from utter disdain to something completely different, something that they could not even define just yet. They needed time to figure out what that meant for the both of them ...
***
Edmund was like a whole new man when he returned to the room where his mother had sat, waiting anxiously for him. He had been gone much longer than expected, which Iris knew was either a really good thing or an utterly terrible one. Judging by the overly happy expression on his face, it was the former.
Thank goodness, she thought as relief flooded her. Iris was not sure why, but she had a gut instinct that this was the right thing to do, that Mary would turn out to be the one for her son. She felt glad to learn that her gut might be right.
“How did it go?” she asked innocently enough as she took a sip of her tea. It was hard for her to contain her excitement, but Iris just about managed it.“Different to last time?”
“Oh yes, very different,” Edmund gushed, unable to contain himself in the way that his mother was. “You were right to send me again; that was a good decision. I do believe nerves hindered us the first time around, and now I have been given the opportunity to get to see a different side to Mary.”
“Oh yes.” Iris did her best to stifle a smile. “And what did you discover?”
Edmund took a seat opposite his mother and stared into the distance thoughtfully. So many different emotions raced through him that he did not know where to begin. Everything was wonderful, though. He knew now that he felt very positive about what the future held. He had no idea exactly what would happen between him and Mary yet; he was not in a position to make any sort of decision on that front. His opinion on only being married to someone he loved dearly remained central to him, but he did want to see her again which was a start.
“She is interested,” he said with pursed lips as he gazed out the window. “Unlike anyone I have ever met before. She has clearly led a very sheltered life, but that is understandable considering she has not had both parents for quite some time.”
Iris held in a laugh. It amused her that her son thought himself so worldly when he was also sheltered, just in a different way. He kept his own world quite small; it just seemed bigger to him because it involved many countries. Iris hoped that he and Mary could bring out the best in one another. Her son was wonderful, but he did need to open up more.
“Well, that is lovely. I presume you will not be sending out any rash letters and attending any m
ore balls anytime soon?”
While Iris did not know exactly what happened at the ball, she could tell that it had affected her son. His whole attitude changed dramatically afterwards, so obviously he did not enjoy the experience. Maybe he had seen how false the whole thing was, how awful it felt to be on display, or maybe someone had behaved terribly.
Either way, it had led to a lot of good things. Now he was considering Mary as an option, which was utterly wonderful.
“No, I shall not. Not for the time being. I am happy to see where things will go.”
Edmund left the room and walked through the house with a bounce in each step. Happiness lifted him like he was filled with air; he had never felt so positive about the future. This proved to him that he really needed to start giving people a second chance. He had not recognised how much he judged people by the first impression he got from them before. It was a ruthless attitude that had done him well in business, but clearly not in his personal life.