by Lulu Pratt
Andrew beat me to it.
Good.
“I can’t believe you went behind my back and contacted Andrew.”
Perturbed by my loud tone, Edward squints at me and shrugs.
“What do you care? You can stop pretending to like him now. You should be thanking me.”
“What the hell are you talking about? I was never faking anything.”
“Sure you were. Which is why you kept your real boyfriend in the shadows while you played your part. Give it up, Ms. Tucker. The cat is out of the bag. I know all about your relationship with Mason Reid. You sneak off to see him before you run home to my brother.”
Has he been following me? How the hell does he know about Mason?
My stomach churns at the violation. He’s the one who told Andrew I was meeting him behind his back?
“Mason isn’t my boyfriend. He’s a friend. Not that I have to explain anything to you.”
“Whatever you say, Ms. Tucker,” he shrugs dismissively.
“I know you used me to steal from Andrew,” I announce and you could hear a pin drop, it’s so silent.
“What are you talking about?” It’s his turn to ask questions.
“Rio Venture Corp is as fake as the position you made up for me, and I want answers.”
Forty-two
LILAH
“You hate him so much that you were willing to steal his inheritance?”
I’m floored after Edward’s explanation. Not to mention repulsed. How much hatred could someone hold in their heart to their own flesh and blood?
I’ve seen some fucked-up family bonds in my day, but Edward is really pushing the limits.
“He doesn’t deserve a dime of that money,” Edward insists, standing firm in his bullshit. “My father worked hard to give us everything we have and Andrew couldn’t care less. He’d rather squander it away on his failing attempt at an art career and traveling the world to fuck as many women as possible. He’s a disgrace to the family name.”
Blinking slowly, I try to process everything he’s saying but it’s a chore. My brain is at its wits’ end making it harder to process bullshit.
“Andrew is his own person and you hate him for it. I didn’t see it until now but you really loathe him for being his own person because all you ever knew how to do is be a miniature version of your father. You’d really stoop this low to hurt your only remaining family member and that’s some sick shit. You’re the disgrace if you ask me.”
Edward’s lips thin at my words, however he continues silently brooding as I go on.
“I feel sorry for you, Edward. You’re so caught up in this shit that you can’t even see the problem staring back at you in the mirror. Have you ever asked yourself why it bothers you so much to see your brother living his life on his own terms? Are you jealous of his freedom?”
“Enough,” Edward booms, sitting forward in his chair. “I don’t have to listen to this shit.”
Clucking my tongue, I fold my arms across my chest and narrow my eyes.
“If you know what’s good for you, you will sit right there and enjoy every word I have to say. Otherwise, I’m calling the cops and telling them all about the con artist I worked for all summer.”
He doesn’t say a word.
“Did you once consider how this would affect me? I could go to jail!”
Frowning at me, he tries to shush me by holding up a hand.
“Relax, no one’s going to jail. You’re blowing this way out of proportion.”
“I can’t relax. This is my life on the line. My dreams on the line. Do you know how much I’ve sacrificed this summer in order to work for you? Now it may end in a jail sentence if Andrew decides to press charges. This is so fucked up,” I finish, my voice growing faint as I suppress the urge to burst into tears.
I will not break down in front of this scumbag. He doesn’t deserve a single tear.
Shaking my head, I stand strong, ready to flee from his presence. “I came to you for help and you used me to exact revenge on an innocent person. I can’t believe I was naïve enough to trust you, but this is where it ends.”
Tears well up in my eyes as I finish my statement.
“Listen, you’ll still get your money okay? Since you sort of kept your end of the deal, I’ll transfer the morning first thing tomorrow morning,” he offers as if it’s enough to erase all the other terrible things that have happened.
“Keep it,” I spit at him. “You’re out of your mind if you think I’m taking a dime from you. I don’t want your money.”
***
I wake up in a cold sweat, panting for air. When I open my eyes I have a hard time distinguishing my nightmare from reality. The lines are blurred anyway.
In the dream, cops showed up at the elementary school while I was teaching my class and led me away in handcuffs as my kids looked on with forlorn expressions.
As the cops ushered me through the halls, other teachers stood at their doors and watched it, all shaking their heads at my misfortune. At the entrance of the school, Andrew was standing stoically as the police shoved me into the pack of the cop car.
I’d been crying and screaming “no” by the time I woke up.
Now I run my hands over my damp cheeks, wiping away the tears.
The clock on my nightstand reads four-twelve. My camisole is drenched and clinging to me as I sit up against the headboard.
I can lay here and torture myself or I can get up and change into some dry clothes.
Pulling myself out of bed, I pad into the kitchen in the dark and grab a glass from the cupboard. When it’s filled with ice chips, I lean against the counter and focus solely on breathing in and out.
Breathe in.
Breathe out.
I coach myself through that cycle at least ten times before I start to relax. It’s the only way to avoid dissolving into a sobbing mess in the middle of my kitchen.
No matter how much I wish that it wasn’t, yesterday was very real and I’m still reeling from everything that came to light.
In a matter of minutes, I’d gone from deciding to finally come clean to Andrew about everything to having it all snatched away before I got the chance.
And I have nobody to blame but myself. I should have said something. This all could have been avoided if I was just upfront with him from the beginning.
I waited too long and it cost me the man I love.
Nauseated, I slurp some of the ice into my mouth and begin crunching rhythmically.
How the hell has this become my life? It seems so surreal right now and I can barely get a grasp on reality.
It isn’t self-pity I’m feeling at the moment, but shame. Shame that I deceived someone I claimed to love.
Granted, I never said those three words aloud to him but I still felt them in my heart and still decided to do what I did.
Andrew’s really gone.
He kicked me out of his house and I don’t think I’ll ever get the look of disgust he gave me out of my mind.
Where do I go from here?
Without the money from Edward, I’m back at square one. But I refuse to accept anything from him. His money isn’t good money and I definitely learned that the hard way this summer.
Drowning in my burdensome thoughts, I try to focus on something other than the ache in my chest but I can’t.
With my growing business expenses, I can barely afford the rent on this dilapidated apartment. My car is gone and thanks to my summer of distraction, and I’m totally unprepared for the school year which starts all too soon.
All this for a project that I’m never going to see flourish. Suffocating grief sets in when I realize I’m going to lose it all.
There’s only one viable option to get me out of this and it’s an option I never wanted to consider, but it’s looking inevitable now.
I have to give up.
Forty-three
ANDREW
Waking up on the seventh day without Lilah is no easier than the first day
.
It fucking sucks.
I don’t know how she did it, but she’d managed to make my house feel like a home. Waking up alone was never a problem before, but now I can’t shake the loneliness that’s settled over the whole house.
Irritated, I hop into the shower to wash away some of the memories. But being in the shower doesn’t help at all.
All I can do is reminisce about the way I washed her from head to toe after painting her. Or the countless times I invaded her shower time as she got ready for work in the morning.
We had so many quickies up against these walls and the memories are enough to make me want to pull my hair out.
How the hell did she permeate every part of my existence?
I can’t look anywhere in this godforsaken house without seeing her everywhere.
No matter how many times I tell myself that she’s a two-timing liar, I still crave her. Every part of her.
But she was working for my brother.
I can’t allow myself to want someone who would knowingly get wrapped up in his shady dealings. No matter the cause. All she had to do was ask me for the money and I would have given it to her in a heartbeat. Now I have to hold my nerve and keep her out of my life for good.
No matter how many times she emails or calls, I will not respond.
Why had she chosen to be underhanded about it?
Drying myself off, I ignore her toothbrush above the sink and I reach for mine. I haven’t brought myself to throw hers out yet.
I’ll get around to it one of these days.
Dressed, I head downstairs for coffee. My appetite is hit or miss but the recent lack of sleep makes it necessary for me to load up on caffeine.
My kitchen feels cold without her.
Every morning, we’d sit at the bar and eat breakfast and now the silence is killing me.
Even Gladys misses her. She’s told me countless times that it may be worth my while to hear out Lilah, but I won’t change my mind. There’s nothing she can say to convince me she didn’t know what she was doing.
I’m on my second cup of coffee when there’s a chime alerting me to someone at the gate.
The black Bentley, without a doubt, belongs to my brother and I don’t want to see him.
He’s showed up every day for the past three and he won’t take the fucking hint.
I already wanted nothing to do with him before, but now those feelings are amplified. He’s a repulsive animal who needs to rot in hell.
It makes me sick to think I confided in Lilah about him and she was working for him the whole time.
If I needed any further proof that no one is to be trusted, I have it in spades now. I should have stuck to the script and moved on after checking her off my bucket list.
I won’t make that mistake again. Lesson fucking learned.
Pressing the buzzer again, Edward makes his second attempt to get me to open the gate.
I watch amused at the way he stares down at his Rolex while waiting.
Forever the impatient asshole.
You’d think he’d stay far away from me after the way I smacked him around last time. But it looks like he wants more.
Oh, what the hell? I’m bored and could use some entertainment. He’s just going to keep showing up every day.
Swiping up, I open the gate and his car roll through moments later.
Pulling open the door, I notice that his nose has healed and can’t resist commenting on it.
“I see that you are healing nicely, is that why you’re back for more?”
Edward only cuts his eyes at me and asks if he can come in.
“We need to talk,” he states.
“I think you did enough of that on your last unannounced visit.”
He has the decency to look remorseful.
“I fucked that up, Andrew. Hear me out,” he sighs, staring at me with eyes that mirror my own.
As much as I want to send his ass packing, I stop when I remember he’s the only family I have left and if we’re at odds then I really have no one to turn to in this world.
And that thought fucks me up more than I’m willing to admit.
We’ve had our differences over the years but my beef was never really with him. It was with my dad and he died before we could resolve our issues.
I don’t want that to happen again. No matter how screwed up the situation is, he’s all I’ve got.
Leading him into the living room, I plop down in my favorite chair and wait for him to follow suit.
“What do you want?”
My brother lifts his pants legs before taking a seat on the edge of the sofa. He steeples his hands under his chin like he’s deep in thought.
“I owe you an apology,” he starts with a heavy breath.
“What do you think you have to apologize for?” I want to know.
My question stumps him for a minute but he quickly recovers.
“I didn’t know you two were in love,” is all he says.
He looks at me, and I return his gaze, stone faced.
Edward finally continues, “Lilah is in love with you, and you, Andrew, love her back.”
It’s the last thing I expected to come out of his mouth.
“I’m not in love with her,” I deny too quickly. “If anything you did me a favor.”
“Right.” He doesn’t sound convinced. “Look, all your money has been recovered and rerouted back to your account. I was a dickhead for trying to take something that wasn’t mine to begin with.”
Wordlessly, I study him and he starts to fidget.
“I guess I didn’t want to admit that you were right all those years. I am jealous of you and I didn’t understand just how much until I realized how much Lilah loves you and how much you love her.”
“Stop saying that shit. She’s no better than you in my book. She played her part. Hope you compensated her accordingly,” I say with a shrug.
It’s none of my business either way but I at least hope she got something out of all this.
“That’s the thing. She won’t take it. She doesn’t want anything to do with my money after the way things blew up. All she did that night was defend you and that’s when I realized I fucked up. That woman loves you with everything in her.”
Focusing on the carpet, I’m quiet as he elaborates.
“In all fairness, I really did think she was cheating on you. I couldn’t wait to rub that shit in your face after I had seen her out with the guy when I went to pick up coffee one day. I hired a private investigator to collect any evidence he could, but their coffee shop meetings were all he uncovered. They never went home or anywhere else together and barely even touched.”
I don’t give a fuck. She was still doing it behind my back. Why is he in my living room defending her right now?
“She turned to this Mason after she saw the return on your first investment. I’d been hounding her all week to get you to make another commitment but she wouldn’t budge. That night I came over here she had just discovered Rio Venture Corp was a decoy and was headed here to tell you herself. My guy overhead the conversation and I knew I needed to run interference. So I did what I did and I’m not proud of it,” he finishes with a shake of his head.
When I don’t say anything, he sighs and stands to his feet.
“I felt like I owed you an explanation… face to face. I’ll see myself out. Take care of yourself, Andrew.”
Forty-four
LILAH
“Lilah, do you have a minute?”
My hand stills on my spoon as soon as I hear her voice.
It’s Charli.
And she no doubt wants to talk, but I’m really not in the mood. I haven’t been in the mood for the last three months if we’re keeping count.
I just want to enjoy my yogurt in peace while my class is away for their weekly music lesson. Not talk about whatever it is that Charli wants to discuss.
But it would childish to turn her away… again. I can only avoid her for so long befor
e she calls in reinforcements, namely my mom. And that is not a duo I want to tackle at the moment.
“Sure, come on in.”
I push my yogurt to the corner of my desk and watch her approach.
She looks fabulous as always in a belted denim shirtdress and leopard-print pashmina. Her hair is up in her signature teaching topknot and a pencil is sticking out of the curly mass.
“How have you been?” she asks quietly.
The awkward tension filling the room since she entered makes me want to cringe. This is my best friend and we’ve been reduced to this?
I feel like shit when I see the sadness in her eyes because it’s all my fault. I withdraw during difficult times. It’s my thing. But this last bout has been the worst one yet.
Where I would usually run to Charli to vent about everything eating me up inside, I’ve shut her out too.
“I’m okay,” I answer in a wobbly voice.
“I’m worried about you, Lilah.” And I can’t ignore the concern plastered across her face.
“I’m fine. There’s absolutely no need for your concern.”
She flinches as if I’ve just slapped and I want to sink into the floor.
What the hell is wrong with me? Why am I being such an asshole to someone who clearly cares about me?
“You’re my best friend, I will always worry about you,” she says fiercely.
“Sorry,” I mutter avoiding eye contact.
“You’ve lost a lot of weight,” she observes sadly.
A broken heart will do that to you. My appetite has been missing in action for some time now.
“Why don’t you let me take you to dinner tonight?”
My first instinct is to decline her offer, but I realize if I’m ever going to return to my normal self I should probably try to engage in social interactions beyond the five-year-old kids I teach every day.
I’ve been faking the funk since August and here we are in the middle of October.
Something’s gotta give.
So I accept. “Sure. That would be great.”
A genuine smile touches her lips and she starts rattling off things at the speed of light.