“And everything from there was just a fucking lie?” Bella asks, her voice rising to a yell. “Was everything just some . . . some way to make it easier to kill me?” She sounds incredulous, like this isn’t possibly her life, but it is. And she’s in very real danger. I have to make her understand.
“No!” I rasp, standing to face her so she hears me clearly. “Every moment I shared with you just made it harder. Bella, with every time we’ve talked, from the first moment I touched your hand, I felt split in half. When we went up to the overlook, I knew I could never do it. You’re too good, too pure . . . you are what this world needs. Not Blackwell, with his jealousy and his hate. The world needs you. And so I’ve been delaying, making excuses, putting Blackwell off, trying desperately to figure out a way out of this.”
“Why not just walk away?” Bella asks. “Why not go to the cops?”
“Because they’re in his pocket,” I reply with a dark laugh. “The man’s got influence that stretches far and wide.” I glance out the front window, remembering Blackwell’s words and the suspicion that he has information superhighways feeding all sorts of intel right back to his ear. Particularly ones about Bella and my lack of follow-through on this assignment.
“And walking away isn’t an option. At first, it was because he has information I need. Jeremy was killed in a drive by, and I’ve searched for a decade to find his killers. I’ve damn near sold my soul just to find out who did that to my sweet brother and Blackwell knows. He claims to know who killed Jeremy. He knew I’d do just about anything to get a lead and preyed on that. It’s why I took the job in the first place. But I’ve given up on that. All that matters is you. But if I don’t complete my contract, he’ll just hire someone else to do the job . . . and probably add me as target number two.”
For the first time, Bella shivers, realizing the danger she’s in. “I just wanted to help Mia.”
I nod. “I know. You’re a good friend, a good person, and I’m trying my damnedest to be a good protector for you.”
“Protector?” she scoffs, her eyes going hazy, and I suspect she’s picturing the monstrous version of me she saw looming over an unconscious Russell. “Is that what a protector is?”
“I’m not a good man. I was angry at Russell, and even if I didn’t go there to kill him, I can’t promise what would’ve happened if you hadn’t shown up. I know what I’m capable of, and it’s not pretty. The only thing that gives me hope is that you’ve seen something in me that might be redeemable. I don’t know.”
“And why shouldn’t I call the cops on you? You’ve been hired to kill me. You’ve been stalking me. Maybe I should have you arrested since you’re the immediate threat.”
It hurts, but I hold out my wrists as if she could cuff me right now. “If you wish, I won’t stop you. But Bella, I promise that I will give my life to protect you. Yes, I’m falling for you . . . but I’m not foolish enough to think that I deserve your love after knowing what you know about me. But please . . . give me a chance to save your life.”
“How?” she whispers. I can see the weight of the conversation taking its toll, the heaviness of what could have happened pressing on her chest as she visibly shrinks before me.
I shake my head, wiping at my cheek and realizing there’s wetness there, horror at what I’ve done to this poor woman. “I haven’t totally figured that out yet. One does not simply walk into the Blackwell Building and start recreating the lobby scene from The Matrix. Not if they expect to actually get Blackwell.”
Bella opens her mouth to say something, then closes it, turning around and starting to pace again. “This is insane. I’m sitting here discussing killing people with a hitman who I want to be my boyfriend, and he’s just put my sorta-landlord in the hospital.”
“Do you still want me to be your boyfriend?” I ask, glomming onto the one piece of hope in her summary.
But she ignores the question, still lost in her own rehash. “Why not go to Thomas?” Bella asks. In her voice, I hear encouraging tones. She’s in shock, but she’s at least accepting what I’m saying without dismissing it outright. Belief might still be a little way off, but for now, she’s at least listening and taking it in, offering solutions. “You know, the enemy of my enemy is my friend. And Thomas is a friend of friend already.”
I consider it, even though it’s one of a myriad of possible ideas I’ve already gone through. “It may come to that. Power for power, but right now, I think it would be like throwing kerosene on a bonfire, and Mia and Thomas would be the ones to pay the price if they jump into the fray. As scary as it is to consider, right now, Blackwell is focused on you, and they are safe.”
It’s a shitty move to make, because I know she’ll do anything to keep her friends safe, even at the expense of herself. But it’s the only way I can see getting her to agree with the only idea I’ve come up with, delay until I can find an angle on Blackwell. I throw the hook, baiting her.
“But I have another idea. Honestly, it’s the only way out that I can see right now.”
She looks at me through her lashes, not knowing how innocent and scared she looks. It draws out every protective instinct I have. “What?”
“We’re out of time. We need to get you out of town, where I can keep you safe until I figure out how to keep Blackwell off you.”
“I’m not running!” Bella says, and in her voice and face I see the determination, the spirit that has me falling for her. She’s not going to retreat. She’s going to take on the world on her own terms, and there’s not a damn thing anyone can do about it.
“Bella, I’ll do everything I can to protect you. I’ll get you back here to your home, to your friends. But we need to get out of town if I have any chance of implementing any sort of plan.”
“How can I just leave with you? I have so many unanswered questions. This is crazy.”
I walk closer to her, slowly and steadily, giving her time to flee, but she doesn’t move. Not even as I push her hair behind her ears and hold her face up, forcing her eyes to mine. “I’ll answer any question you want . . . when we’re on the road. I can see you want to push me out that door and go to your friends, the ones who have had your back your whole life. I get it, I do. But they don’t have the skills I do. And I say that knowing it makes me even scarier in your eyes. You shouldn’t trust me . . . but I need you to. Because more than anything else in this world, I don’t want you to end up dead.”
Bella blinks at the verbal shot, and then her eyes focus, questioning me. But I can’t say the words she wants to hear. Not like this, not when it’ll seem like a ploy. So I give her another truth. “You deserve all the best things the world has to offer, but the world deserves the very best of Isabella Turner too. Let me make sure that happens. Please.”
Chapter 22
Isabella
I don’t remember agreeing, exactly, but I must have because Gabe is suddenly shuffling around my house to pack my bag. I can’t help, frozen and still trying to make sense of the information dump and paradigm shift I was just subjected to. It doesn’t work. I’m still so lost.
It feels like no matter which way I turn, there’s a threat looming, scary men using me as a pawn, taunting me into running and nipping at my heels to direct my destination the way they want. It’s enough to make me want to say fuck it all and run on my own, just ditch my life and start over someplace fresh.
But I can’t do that. I have people here whom I love and who love me and a future I’ve worked hard to secure and am so close to achieving. I won’t give it up because some asshole in his fancy tower deems me a beneficial loss.
Gabe stops in front of me, my backpack slung on like he’s ready to roll. He puts his hands on my shoulders and looks at me. “Say it, Bella. I’m not kidnapping you, but I want you to come with me. If you can’t, we’ll find another way. I just don’t know what that is.”
This is the moment of truth. My decision time.
I don’t know Gabe, I realize. I thought I did, and even now
, what he shared feels real. But what if it was a ploy? I search his eyes, holding my breath and hoping for some sort of sign.
He takes it as an answer, dropping the backpack to the floor. Running his fingers through his hair, he paces. “Fuck. Okay, we’ll stay if that’s what you want, but I gotta figure out . . .” His voice fades as he mumbles to himself, eyes going wild before he focuses sharply. It sounds like he’s running through scenarios and options for staying here and keeping me safe.
It’s what I need. Some small piece of reassurance that he will do what I want, even in a situation that is largely beyond anything I’ve ever considered, and even if it’s not what he thinks is best. I guess I thought he’d shove me out the door regardless, kidnapping me, as he said. But that he is willing to follow my lead somehow gives me peace that what I’ve been feeling is true and what he feels about me is real.
I bend down to pick up my own bag. “I need to stop by the diner, give Martha her car back, and ask her to watch Vash.”
His eyes jump to me, my agreement instantly stopping his play-by-play of possible outcomes and strategies.
He doesn’t ask if I’m sure, taking me at my word and moving toward the door. But he stops, one hand on the frame. “We need to assume we’re being watched. I chose your school bag so it’ll look like you’re just heading out for a usual day. But if we look suspicious or angry, basically anything other than the happy couple, it’ll rouse concerns.”
“What do you want me to do?” I ask, hearing that he’s leading up to something.
“We’re going to walk outside, kiss goodbye like everything’s fine, and get in our vehicles. I’ll follow you to the diner, and you need to tell them that this is a vacation or something—like I’m whisking you away, so act happy. And then we’ll leave town in my truck.”
I take a big breath, realizing just how crazy this sounds. “That’s a lot. Martha will know something’s up. And don’t you need to go by the motel?” I mean it to be more of a sting than it really is, a show that I know something, at least. But it doesn’t land, and he brushes the question off.
“I’ll get what I need on the road. I do it all the time. Sell Martha on this. Please, Bella.”
The kiss outside is awkward, but Gabe pulls me to him and cups my jaw in his powerful hand. If anyone’s watching, it probably looks like a sweet, sultry kiss. And for sure, Mrs. Petrie across the street is watching, but if Gabe is right, who else is?
The drive to The Gravy Train gives me time to think, but even without Gabe’s influence, I can feel in my gut that this is the right thing to do. If Blackwell’s after me, and I do believe Gabe that he is, this is the best way to be safe.
A single butterfly flutters around in my belly at the thought of being away from my tough life, alone with Gabe and all his terror and his sexiness. And even the fear and questions surrounding this situation aren’t enough to contain the slight buzz. It makes me feel a bit pitiful to be excited about something dire, but it’s a different sort of fear than not making the rent or having Russell bark and bitch at me.
Russell. Even thinking his name draws up the image of his body slumping to the floor. Is he okay, I wonder, or did Gabe finish the job after I left? A shudder racks through me, but I realize shamefully that even if he did kill Russell after I left, I don’t care. God, I’m awful. But Russell has made my life a living hell, scared the piss out of me so many times I’ve lost count, and is an absolute terrifying waste of a human life. His death would be mourned by none and quietly celebrated by many.
So I don’t call the police or an ambulance, even now that I could. Maybe I should do something, but I can live with the guilt of non-action more than I can live with the consequences of Russell taking vengeance for this on me.
The parking lot at The Gravy Train is full, a blessing because it means Martha won’t have time to focus on me the way she would if there was no one calling for a refill.
Inside, I wave and smile, feigning that everything’s fine the way Gabe said to. “Thanks, Martha. Sorry for the drama earlier, but uhm . . .” I bite my lip, nervous about this part. “I have a huge favor to ask.”
Her eyes narrow, but then she lifts her brows, inviting me to ask away.
“Gabe wants to take me away for the weekend, a last-minute getaway.” I freeze. “I mean, vacation. A last-minute vacation. Is there any way you could get Shelly or Elaine to cover for me and feed Vash for me?”
“I can do that, but only if you tell me what had you running out of here like your tail was on fire earlier.” She crosses her arms, looking every bit the stern mom-figure she’s been for me.
I stammer, not sure what to say, and Gabe slips an arm around my shoulders. I hadn’t even realized he was behind me. “I’m afraid that’s my fault. I was trying to surprise her and might have accidentally let the cat out of the bag, so to speak. She freaked a bit.”
Martha smiles like she completely understands that I would do something like that. She reaches for my hands, looking so charmed she might as well be blessing our union. God, if only she knew the truth, she’d be stringing Gabe up by his toenails and she’d use Henry’s good knives to destroy the evidence of killing him for being mixed up in this.
“Go, honey. Treat yourself for once. You do so much here. Let us do for you this time.” She pulls me in for a hug, and while it feels good to have her love envelop me, I feel bad for lying to her. She turns to Gabe, patting him on the cheek. “You must be something special if she’s ditching us for a weekend away with you.”
There’s a warning in her tone, and I wonder what they talked about the night I saw them talking while Gabe waited for my dinner break.
Outside, Gabe opens the door to his truck, helping me in. I see him scan the lot without moving his head as he walks around to the driver side, just his eyes moving. “I think we’re clear. Not sure if that’s a bad sign or we’re just fucking lucky. But we’ll be careful on the way out of town to make sure we’re not being followed.”
We’re quiet on the way out of town, but slowly, conversation starts as my fear fades. It’s not that I’m no longer afraid, but merely that my body has burned out all the adrenalin and I’m feeling flat and tired now.
“Tell me how it got to this point,” I say.
Gabe scratches at his lip with his thumb, glancing into the rearview mirror for the tenth time. “Like I said, you helped Thomas catch a corporate saboteur whom Blackwell planted. He felt like you were an easier target—”
“Not me, you,” I interrupt. “Oh, wait. I just realized something. I don’t think Mia and Thomas know Blackwell had anything to do with that whole mess. They thought it was just a single man’s vendetta. Well, I guess it is, but they don’t realize the man is Blackwell. I need to call them.”
I look around for my phone, and Gabe shakes his head. “I left it behind. It’s traceable, Bella. You can call Mia from a burner phone if you need to, but I think we need to wait until we figure out the game plan before we get them involved. Can you give me a little bit of time?”
I sigh, turning to look out the window. It feels wrong to not tell my bestie this, but as long as she’s safe with Thomas, I can wait a day or two. I still double-check myself again, but as crazy as this all sounds, it also makes sense and feels like the truth. Gabe’s truth about why he’s here and hanging out with me, so I have to take the leap of faith and not call Mia immediately, no matter how much I want to.
Gabe clenches his jaw, gritting his teeth like he’s the one hurting. “After Jeremy died, I fell apart. It was slow at times, so incremental I didn’t even notice, and then I’d take a leap, lashing out at the world.”
My head snaps his way. “Tell me,” I demand again. And this time, he knows what I mean.
“It started with me asking questions, simple enough but hard, nevertheless. All too quickly, things got violent as I demanded answers from people who ultimately had none to give. But I developed a reputation for a rather in-demand skillset. In a way, I put aside my own mission for o
ther people’s, but doing this ugly work let me hide in the shadows, seeking information in a way I couldn’t as a regular guy.” His eyes leave the road, quickly glancing over to judge my reaction.
“I’ve tried to maintain my own sense of justice, of right and wrong, by carefully choosing the contracts I accept and doing my own due diligence. That’s why I realized that you were an innocent, because I looked into you and couldn’t find a single evil thing about you. But I found plenty about Blackwell because I always research my employer as well. It’s good to know who you’re getting into bed with.”
I scoff. “I agree.”
But I’m not talking about business arrangements and he knows it.
He reaches over slowly, placing a hand on my knee and squeezing. “You know me. Everything between us was real, is real. There was just another layer you didn’t know about then, but now you do.”
I want to fall into him, desperate to believe but unwilling to plunge carelessly. “But it’s the very foundation we were building on, and now I find out that it’s faulty.”
He swallows thickly and clears his throat. “Then we’ll start fresh and rebuild.”
Chapter 23
Isabella
“Bella?”
I look over, where Gabe’s sitting behind the wheel of the truck, a worried look on his face. We’ve stopped for gas, and I guess I haven’t said anything in awhile. “Sorry . . . I was just thinking.”
“Ah,” Gabe replies, starting the truck up and pulling back out. “You just looked . . . I’m not sure.”
I nod, turning to him. “How’d you get that nickname? The Fallen Angel?” He’s been telling me about his life in bits and bites as we drive, more about his work and ‘fall from grace’, as he calls it, and about who he’d been once upon a time, before his soul had been stained with his dark actions.
Not So Prince Charming: A Dirty Fairy Tale Page 19