by Alexa Land
While he was gone, I retrieved the towel and wrapped it around myself like a shawl. Then I put my head on my knees and took a few deep, shuddery breaths. Damn it. I hated the fact that I’d lost it at work, and in front of Sergei.
He soon returned with a big to-go cup and a straw, and when he thrust it at me, I murmured, “I don’t want to sound ungrateful, but I meant alcohol, not a soda.”
“That’s a hell of a lot of vodka over ice, with a splash of cranberry juice. I told the bartender you were having an emotional breakdown, so he hooked you up.”
I accepted the cup from him and said, “You probably could have skipped the part about telling Rico I was having a breakdown, but thanks for the drink.”
I took a sip from the straw and coughed a little. It was strong enough to make my eyes water, but I kept drinking until it was gone. After a few moments of making loud slurping sounds as I tried to vacuum up every last drop, Sergei snatched the cup away from me and asked, “Feel better?”
“Not even a little.”
“Tell me what’s wrong.”
“Why should I?”
“Because you obviously need someone to talk to, and I’m the only one here.”
“That’s not enough of a reason.”
“It’s going to have to be, because this,” he gestured all around me, “needs to stop.”
I said, “If it’s bothering you, just go away.”
“Tell me what’s going on. Why is your boyfriend on a date with someone else?”
Sergei sat on the bench across from me, and as concisely as I could, I told him about Duke’s decade-long crush, and how Even Eide had outbid me at the charity auction. Then he asked, “Is Duke the really tall guy who punched out that drunk, the night your dad was here?”
“Yeah, that’s him.”
“Damn it, Quinn, that’s a man worth fighting for! Why are you just sitting here and letting this happen?”
“What can I do? Eide paid a fortune for the date, the money went to a good cause, and Duke is going out with him willingly.”
“But look what it’s doing to you!”
“I’m probably being stupid. Maybe it’s totally innocent, and they’re just going to have some food, talk about hockey, and never see each other again.”
Sergei asked, “Did it seem innocent when Duke and Eide met?”
“Actually…no. Duke was almost too stunned to speak, but Eide was definitely flirting and checking him out.”
“Did Eide know you were Duke’s boyfriend when he bid against you at the auction?” I shook my head, and he said, “But you told him afterwards, right?”
“Actually, I just left. I was reeling after it was all said and done, and I needed to get myself together. Obviously, I never actually achieved that.”
“I understand needing time to regroup, but why wouldn’t you make sure that rich fucker knew the score before you took off?”
“I thought I might be overreacting,” I said. “I mean, the auction was supposed to be fun, and it raised money for a good cause. I wasn’t supposed to feel threatened or jealous.”
“Who cares how you were ‘supposed to’ feel? If you were unhappy, you should have said something! And it’s not too late. You can still speak up.”
“How? Am I supposed to march into Elixir and announce that Duke is mine, then slap Even Eide with a white glove and challenge him to a duel?”
“Oh shit. He took him to Elixir?”
I nodded and asked, “Have you eaten there?”
“Hell no. I couldn’t possibly afford it. But I bussed tables there for a few weeks, before they fired me for telling an obnoxious customer to go fuck himself,” he said. “Nobody, and I mean nobody, goes there on a casual date. The entire place is designed to do two things: impress and seduce. If this rich guy took your man to Elixir, it’s because he really wants to get in his pants.”
“You’re making this all so much worse.”
“I’m just telling you what I know. The kitchen staff would joke about it, like, ‘table three just ordered the fifty-seven dollar fuck-me-now pommes frites.’ That’s French fries, by the way. Or, ‘table five is sealing the deal with the ninety dollar blow-me-crème-brulee.’ That’s a little dish of custard.”
“I know what crème brulee is, and Duke’s not going to sleep with him.”
Sergei asked, “How can you be so sure?”
“Because he’s not a slut.”
“But you just told me he’s been crushing on this guy since he was a teen.”
“Still.” I frowned and said, “You’re probably making this out to be way worse than it actually is. Like I said, it could all be perfectly innocent.”
“Wake up, Quinn. That rich fucker paid twenty thousand dollars for one night with your man. If all he wanted was to donate to the shelter, he could have easily cut them a check. But he didn’t do that. Instead, he made a point of outbidding all his competitors. He staked a claim on Duke. And then he didn’t take him on a bro date for pizza and beer, he took him to one of the most romantic and expensive restaurants in town. People don’t go there with friends, family, or business associates. They only go to Elixir because they’re trying to wine and dine their way into someone’s pants.”
The conversation was pushing my anxiety through the roof. I jumped up and started pacing around the locker room. “I wish I could be a fly on the wall during their date. If I could see them for myself and confirm Eide isn’t trying anything, I’d feel so much better.”
Sergei got up too and said, “Actually, if you really want to do that, I know how to make it happen.”
“Seriously?” When he nodded, I asked, “How?”
“I used to work there, remember? I know a spot where you can look directly into the dining room without anyone seeing you.”
“I couldn’t spy on him. It’d basically be saying I don’t trust Duke, but I do. It may not sound like it right now, because I’m so angry and jealous I can barely think straight. But I definitely trust him.”
“Yeah, but it’s that rich fucker you shouldn’t trust,” Sergei said. “Besides, you’re not going to be spying on them. You’re just going to take a quick look at whatever’s happening on their date, so you can gain some peace of mind. You obviously need that, since you’re a total fucking disaster right now.”
“Thanks.”
“Well, you are. Want me to take you to Elixir? It’s not all that far, and we can be back here in less than half an hour. Preston adores you, so he’ll totally sign off on this, especially since the club is dead tonight.”
“I don’t get why you’re helping me. We’ve worked together for six months, and all I’ve ever gotten from you is hostility.”
He crossed his big arms over his chest and said, “Maybe I want you to owe me a favor.”
“Or maybe my dad is right, and you’re secretly a nice guy who just wants everyone to think you’re an asshole.”
“No, I’m an asshole who wants everyone to think I’m an asshole. Now are we doing this, or what? Because they’re not going to be at Elixir forever.”
“Alright, let’s go. I think I’ll feel better once I see with my own eyes that the date is perfectly innocent.”
“And if you see Eide trying to hit on your boyfriend?”
“Then I’m going to kick his ass.”
“Really?”
“They’ve been on their date for over an hour. Duke must have told him by now that he has a boyfriend. If Eide is hitting on him anyway, then he’s a dick, and he deserves a swift ass-kicking.”
Sergei frowned as I turned to my locker and dialed the combination on the padlock. “You told me this guy is six-foot-eight and used to be a professional hockey player. If you start something, he’s going to snap you like a twig.”
“I don’t care.”
I grabbed my jeans and sat down on the wooden bench, but when I tried to pull off my tall rain boots, they wouldn’t budge. I struggled with them while Sergei changed into a pair of jeans, a T-shirt, and a
leather jacket, all black. He turned to me when he was fully dressed and asked, “What the hell are you doing?”
“My boots are stuck. I think it’s because they’re all sweaty inside after dancing in them, so the rubber won’t slide over my skin.”
He rolled his eyes and grabbed a boot, then tried his damnedest to yank it off my foot. It wouldn’t budge. Finally, he dropped it and said, “Just pull your pants on over them.”
I tried to do that, but there was no way to cram the boots through the legs of my jeans. I threw my clothes back in the locker, retrieved my yellow hat and raincoat, and said, “Fuck it. Nobody’s going to see me anyway.”
Sergei’s frown deepened, and he grabbed the towel. When he came right up to me and took hold of my chin, I exclaimed, “What are you doing?”
“Trying to downgrade you from a class five natural disaster to a class two.” He dragged the towel over each cheek, then held it up to show me the smears of mascara, eyeliner, and blue glitter. “Just so you know, you still look horrific. But if I try to wipe your eyes, I have a feeling I’m just going to smear everything more than it already is.”
“It doesn’t matter. Let’s just go.”
He tossed the towel into the laundry hamper as we headed to the door and muttered, “At least you look slightly less like a homicidal clown now.”
Preston intercepted us on our way to look for him and said, “I was just coming to find you, Quinn. Rico said you were having a mental breakdown. Are you alright?”
I sighed at that. “I’m not having a breakdown. I’m just upset, but Sergei is going to help me with something that should calm me down. We’ll be back in about twenty or thirty minutes, is that alright?”
Preston nodded. “Go ahead. The club keeps getting emptier with each passing minute, so you won’t be missing much.”
I pulled on my yellow slicker and jammed the matching floppy hat on my head, then turned to Sergei and said, “Let’s do this.”
He grimaced and asked, “Is the hat really necessary? You look like a preschooler on a whaling expedition.”
“Yes it’s necessary, because it’s still pouring outside!”
“But we’re travelling by motorcycle, so it’ll just fly off.” I held his gaze as I reached under the hat, pulled out the elastic strap, and snapped it under my chin. Sergei sighed and headed for the door.
*****
Driving to Elixir on Sergei’s ancient, beat-up motorcycle pretty thoroughly sucked. I held onto him tightly and buried my face between his shoulder blades, both to keep from getting pummeled by the rain, and because I’d never been on the back of a motorcycle before and it was scary as hell. Finally, he parked in a back alley, and as we both ducked under an awning, he asked, “Was that really necessary?”
“Was what really necessary?”
“Crushing me in a vice-like grip the whole way over here.” He pulled off his black helmet and rubbed his ribcage. “I can still feel it.”
“You’ll live. Where are we, exactly?”
“That’s Elixir.” He pointed to a one-story structure that must have been built around a courtyard, since a huge tree outlined with white lights rose from the center of it like a mushroom cloud. “Just get up on the roof, then walk around and look through the skylights until you find your boyfriend and the rich fucker. They obviously won’t be on the patio in this weather.”
“What if they aren’t seated near a skylight?”
“They will be. The restaurant is fairly narrow and the tables are spread out for privacy. There’s a skylight over just about every table, so the patrons have a view of the tree branches and the lights while they’re dining.”
I said, “Sounds romantic.”
“That’s the whole idea. Like I said, that place is all about seduction. So, here’s what you’re going to do: climb the fire escape on the side of this building, then circle around on the second-floor balcony. It’s an easy step down onto Elixir’s roof.”
“How do you know this?”
“I liked climbing up there on my dinner breaks and sitting amid the branches.”
I smiled at him and said, “That’s sweet.”
“Shut up.”
“You can stop trying to make me think you’re an asshole, Sergei. You spent the last half hour comforting me, then driving me here in a rainstorm, so I know you’re a good person.”
“If I was a good person, I would have given you the helmet. Now would you hurry up and do this? We need to get back to work.”
“Why does it sound like you’re not coming with me?”
“Because I’m not coming with you.”
“Why not?”
“This is your rodeo, Quinn, not mine. I’ll wait here for you, under this nice, dry awning.”
“But this whole thing was your idea!”
“You’re welcome for thinking of it!”
“Come on,” I cajoled. “I need a partner in crime.”
“No you don’t. I’m freezing my balls off in these rain-soaked jeans, so could you fucking hurry?”
“See? You were making fun of my outfit, but I’m actually nice and toasty. In fact, I’m a bit overheated in this plastic coat.”
He shot me a look and said, “Congratulations.”
“My thighs are cold, though. So are my hands.” I rubbed my palms on my bare legs to warm them up a bit.
“If you don’t go right now, I’m leaving you here.”
“Please don’t do that. I didn’t bring my wallet or bus pass, and it’s a long walk back to the club.”
“Then go!”
“Just come with me! Please? I’ll beg if I have to, and that’ll be awkward for everyone involved.”
“Oh my God! Fine.”
He attached his helmet to the motorcycle, and then we jogged around to the side of the building. I jumped up, caught the bottom of the fire escape and pulled it down, and we made our way to the balcony. When we reached Elixir’s roof, I said, “Um, there’s a problem,” and gestured at the row of big skylights. Each was covered with a layer of wet leaves from the huge tree that stretched out above us.
“I didn’t anticipate that,” Sergei said. “Someone comes up here and cleans the skylights every other day or so. They must have just fallen in this rainstorm.”
“So what are we supposed to do, go around and squeegee off every one of these until we find Duke and his date?”
“Pretty much. Let’s start over here,” he said, making his way to the west side of the restaurant. “That’s the most desirable seating, and if the hockey dude is as rich as you say, he would have slipped the manager some cash to make sure he ended up in a prime spot.”
The five-foot-square skylights were spaced eight feet apart all around the building, which in turn framed a pretty courtyard on all four sides. I reached over the wide, metal rim of the nearest skylight and brushed some leaves from the corner of the glass panel, then said, “So, there’s another problem.” The glass was fogged up from the inside.
Sergei swore under his breath and looked around. Then he ran back to the balcony next door and returned a moment later with a flattened cardboard box, which we’d passed on the way in. “I forgot that the skylights tend to fog up when it’s cold and damp,” he said. “It’s a gradual process, though. It starts on the edges and works its way to the center, so if we’re lucky, maybe part of it is still clear. Get on the other side of the glass, and let’s scrape off the leaves.”
I followed his instructions and grabbed one end of the big box while he held the other, and we pushed all the leaves aside as we dragged it over the skylight. This uncovered an eighteen-inch space in the center of the glass that had yet to fog over. It was still hard to see through it, between the film left behind from the leaf litter and the rain dripping off the branches, but I crouched down and peered through that little vantage point at different angles, and after a minute I announced, “I think I see them!”
We carried the box to another skylight and repeated our squeegee trick, and I said
, “They’re directly below us! That’s lucky. I’m glad it’s not all that dark in there. But damn it, I need to get a better view! I can make out shapes and colors, but I can’t see their expressions. Help me run the box over it one more time.” When we did that, it actually made it worse, since the cardboard tracked a smear of leaf residue over the glass.
“This was a terrible idea,” Sergei said as he let go of his side of the box. “I should have thought about the effect the rain would have on the skylights. I also should have just gone with getting you drunk to cheer you up, instead of operation I-spy. This really is one of the dumbest things I’ve ever done.”
“It was a great idea,” I said as I swung the cardboard around to find a clean edge. “We just need to give it one more sweep.” I stepped up onto the ledge around the skylight and held the box out so Sergei could grab an end.
But in the next instant, my rubber boots slipped on that slick, metal edge and I fell forward. My heart raced as I landed on my hands and knees atop the big piece of cardboard in the center of the skylight. I gripped the edges of the box and exhaled slowly, and then I looked up at Sergei and asked, “Do you think Duke and his date heard that thud?”
Without warning, the skylight swung open, and I yelped as I dropped into the restaurant. There was the clatter of glass shattering and dishes breaking as I landed with a sharp jolt. It rattled my teeth and sent pain radiating from my knees, which took most of the impact. Around me, a few people cried out in alarm.
I’d pressed my eyes shut as I fell, and when I opened them, I found I’d landed directly on Duke and Even’s table. I was still clutching the edges of the box with white-knuckled tenacity, which was lucky, because it had provided protection from the broken plates and glasses beneath me. I glanced at Even, who’d leapt to his feet directly in front of me, then looked over my shoulder at Duke and said, “Hey. How’s it going?”
Both men were absolutely stunned. So were the people at the other tables and the waiter who’d frozen in mid-pour. Everyone was staring at me. Because I didn’t know what else to do, I quipped, “I was just in the neighborhood, thought I’d drop by.”