by B. M. Hardin
I needed Joey to disappear, and I needed to be able to put this baby on my husband. And if Santana was in fact the man that I thought that he was, I knew that being pregnant would change everything between us. He would forgive me and we would move forward in our marriage.
So what if I didn’t exactly know who the father of my baby was; no one else needed to know that. Aside of a few features, it wouldn’t be too difficult to pull off.
Joey was the better looking of the two. He was tall, brown-skinned and his stature was a tad bit more appealing. He had some of the biggest, tanned, seducing lips that I’d ever seen, and they were accompanying by a warm inviting smile. Joey had a single dimple in his right cheek and a mole on his left. He had some of the sexiest brown eyes that I’d ever seen. Santana was only a shade lighter than Joey, but he possessed a bolder, more rugged look. His eyes were daring, and reminded me of stained copper colored pearls. He wore a low beard, and Santana had dreads. Not the long, crazy kind, but the cute kind that were always neat and just above his shoulders. He had a killer smile and the most attractive thing about him was height and his fit, muscular body.
Okay, so maybe they didn’t look anything alike, but Lord, I could pull it off…I had to.
Who was I fooling?
This was a crazy idea!
Having this baby would be crazy.
But I had to do something. I had to save my marriage.
I thought about praying, but after all I’ve done, I felt that maybe God wouldn’t hear me. I tried weighing my pros and my cons, and eventually, I had to make a decision.
I was going to tell Santana, my husband, that I was pregnant with his baby.
My mind was made up. And when the time came, or when I had to tell Joey, I would swear that it was my husbands.
It was the only way. I could only hope that the baby came out looking just like me.
Again, I started to second guess myself.
Maybe this was just too much or maybe instead of fighting for my marriage with Santana, maybe I should go the opposite route and tell Joey that it’s his and take him up on his offer to go ahead and leave his wife.
No, no…that would be way too much.
As my future flashed before my eyes, all I could see was Santana. Santana was the one that I was supposed to be with. Santana was the one that I saw in my future.
Not Joey.
Finally, everything was crystal clear.
I got dressed and headed to Santana’s office.
“Hey,” I half smiled at Santana.
He didn’t look happy to see me. Santana said nothing. He only looked at me for a second, and then he turned his focus back to the computer.
“I miss you,” I said to him but he still remained quiet.
Taking a seat in the chair across from him, I pulled the pregnancy test out of my purse and laid it on his desk.
At first, he refused to take his eyes off of the computer, but after a while he looked down to see what I’d placed only inches from him.
Immediately, his facial expression changed, but I could tell that he didn’t want me to see his excitement.
“What’s this?”
“I’m pregnant. I just found out today,” I said to him and tried to touch his hand but he moved it away.
“Is it mine?” he questioned.
No…maybe…I don’t know…is the answer that I should have said, but of course I didn’t.
“Of course it’s yours. How could you ask me something like that? Santana, there is no one else. I did go to North Carolina. But you were right it wasn’t to visit my family…it was to visit my dead friend Joey’s---mother. His death had been on my mind so much lately that I thought by going to visit his grave, and to talk with his mom, might help. In the past it used to,” I said.
Now, that was one of the best lies I’d ever told…and it kind of made sense.
“Why couldn’t you just tell me Niveah?” Santana asked.
I shook my head.
“I don’t know. I didn’t want you to think that it was anything that you were doing, or our marriage, that had me feeling strange or thinking about Joey and his death. I just didn’t think you would understand,” I said.
“You never gave me the chance to,” Santana responded standing up from his chair.
He walked around his desk and stood directly in front of me.
It wasn’t until then that I noticed that he wasn’t wearing his wedding ring.
“I saw a divorce attorney yesterday. Life is too short and I refuse to be in a marriage if my wife can’t manage to open her damn mouth and tell me what’s going on with her,” Santana said and reached in his pocket.
My heart seemed as though it’d stopped beating. I thought that he was about to pull out papers but instead he pulled out his ring and placed it back on his finger.
“I’m on your side Niveah. I just want to love you. Enough is enough. No more past secrets, or whatever you want to call them. Don’t ever lie to me again,” he said as my head started to nod and the tears began to fall from my eyes. I stood up and he embraced me.
His hands found their way to my stomach.
“So this is for real? I’m going to be a daddy?”
“According to that stick full of pee…absolutely,” and I managed to laugh just before kissing him.
Thank God for second, third and fourth chances.
~***~
Weeks and weeks passed and everything was on the right track and headed in the right direction.
I kept in touch with Joey, just to keep the peace. I hadn’t seen him and didn’t plan to anytime soon; especially since I was starting to show. I hadn’t told him about the baby. I was planning to break the news to him soon but I wanted to let enough time pass so that I could at least try to pin it on my husband.
As for Santana and I; we were better than ever.
He was happier than I’d ever seen him before and so was I. But I must admit, this being pregnant thing was definitely overrated. Though I’d been pregnant before, I’d never been over four to six weeks; but now I was around fourteen weeks and I was ready for it to be over!
I was tired of sleeping, I was tired of eating, and I was definitely tired of peeing!
This baby just couldn’t come fast enough!
I wondered why it had to take a whole nine months. Three or four months seemed like more than enough time to bake a baby, and then get it out of the oven. There wasn’t too many things that I could say that I hated, but, I hated being pregnant! There was nothing at all that I liked about it, but I must admit that I was just a little excited.
I was hoping for a precious little girl, while Santana was praying for a little boy.
A mini-me would be perfect; but on the other hand, I was just praying that the baby, whether boy or girl, looked like at least one of us…and not Joey.
“Niveah, are you dressed yet?” Santana yelled from the living room.
I waddled slowly into his presence.
I was so uncomfortable. I’d never felt so fat in all of my life. Pregnancy clothes did nothing for my figure. I’ve never been too shapely. I wasn’t plus, and I wasn’t exactly skinny, I was just stuck somewhere in between. I didn’t have the curves that most African American women had; I was just straight up and down…except for the watermelons on my chest.
“You look beautiful baby,” Santana complimented me, but I knew that he was lying. I’d spent the last twenty minutes staring at myself in the mirror and there was nothing beautiful about what I’d seen.
I looked like a pig, wrapped in a big red blanket; which was supposed to have been my dress.
Nevertheless, it was time to feed my face and this baby, so we headed out to dinner at one of my favorite Italian restaurants.
“Jones,” Santana said to the waitress, who then checked for our reservation.
“Right this way.”
Santana held my hand as we made our way to the table. Santana pulled out my chair and as I sat down, I saw a very familiar set of ey
es, only a table or two over, staring right at me.
Joey.
Instantly, I became as nervous a model stepping on a scale the day after Thanksgiving.
Joey’s eyes moved from my eyes, down to my stomach.
Oh no…
“Baby, are you okay?” Santana asked.
I needed a lie and I needed one now! I just had to get out of there.
“Baby, the smell, the smell in here is making me sick,” I pretended as though I was about to throw up.
Internally I was so upset. My mouth was watering for a big plate of meaty lasagna, but Joey was unpredictable.
“What do you want me to do?” Santana asked, concerned.
I continued to pretend as though I was feeling nauseous.
“I’m sorry baby, but we’re going to have to go somewhere else,” I said with one hand over my mouth and the other over my stomach.
Santana didn’t bother to ask me any other questions. He simply got up and tried to assist me with getting up from the table.
“Hi!”
I saw her waving but I tried to ignore her.
It was Silvia…Joey’s wife.
“We just keep bumping into each other huh? But I see this time you look a little different. Congratulations,” Silvia squealed.
I smiled and nudged Santana to keep walking.
“I can’t tell just yet but that tummy looks a little high. It’s probably going to be a little girl. Trust me, I have two and believe me, I remember those pregnant days. I’m sorry, I’m just talking and I don’t think we’ve ever properly been introduced. I’m Silvia and this is my husband---“
Before she could say another word I made the loudest gag sound ever, dropped Santana’s hand and ran off.
Santana quickly apologized, and even briefly spoke to Joey and he ran after me, right on my heels.
I was hoping that Santana hadn’t recognized or even seen Joey, but he had. But the good news was that Silvia hadn’t been able to introduce him. Just my luck instead of introducing him as Joseph, she would have called him Joey, and of course, something would have clicked in Santana’s head that something just wasn’t right.
Though I was only pretending, I guess all of the fake gagging actually caused me to vomit, as the liquids spewed out of my mouth and onto the sidewalk.
Santana stood rubbing my back as they rushed to get our car.
Yikes…that was a close one.
As I settled into the passenger seat of Santana’s pearl colored Escalade, I could only imagine how my conversation with Joey was going to go the next day.
Here we go…
~***~
“Joey, calm down!”
“What? Don’t tell me to fucking calm down Niveah! You were really going to try to have my baby…and not tell me?”
“First of all, it’s not your baby…I calculated it all up; this baby is Santana’s,” I lied.
Truth be told, I didn’t have a clue as to who the father of my child was; but I was hoping, praying, that it wasn’t Joey.
“Do I look stupid to you? He may have bought your bull---but don’t forget that I know you like the back of my hand Niveah. And I know your pussy better than you do!”
Joey continued to shout for the next half hour or so. A few times, I’d actually thought that he might hit me, but thank God he hadn’t.
After a while, he stormed out of the corporate apartment and a few minutes later I followed.
He was already gone by the time I’d made my way to the parking lot but I knew that I would be seeing him again…soon.
Joey had made it clear that he wasn’t going anywhere; especially if the baby was his.
So much for my little plan; I guess now it was time for plan B…
~***********~
Chapter Five
As the seasons changed, so did my waistline and my pants size.
I couldn’t see my feet and though I’d complained about not having curves before; I had enough of them now!
Hell, I’d stolen every woman’s ass on my street. My hips had spread like a newly found virus, and I wasn’t happy about it. I had breasts, ass, and way too much stomach.
But I only had three months left to go…before I would be holding my precious baby girl in my arms! Words couldn’t express how happy I was that it was a girl. At least for the most part, and more than likely, she would probably look like me. And that’s all that I was hoping for.
With Santana around being the perfect husband, and with Joey crawling up my back, I was feeling more pressure on my heart, than I was feeling on my bladder.
With the news that I was having a girl, Joey was sure that I was pregnant with his child…and he wasn’t backing off.
He’d started calling even when he knew that I was with Santana. Some nights I’d look out the window and see him sitting there. He damn near demanded that I see him almost every day…or else.
I knew Joey meant what he said, especially when it came down to me, so I knew that if I didn’t play by his rules, he just might follow through on his threats to rat me out to Santana.
It seemed as though the only way to stop him…was to kill him.
I know it sounds to be too much and of course I would have to have some assistance, but I didn’t have a choice.
I could never do such a thing, personally; but enough zero’s on a check could get you just about anything these days…Joey had proved that when he’d hired the men to kill my last husband.
Yes…I still loved Joey.
But since I’d been pregnant, the bond between Santana and I had gotten to be so strong and to be honest, I couldn’t imagine my life without him. Santana was already the perfect husband, and he was going to be the perfect father.
So, I had to get rid of the problem.
I didn’t know how to go about finding someone to get rid of Joey. I didn’t know where to look or where to even begin to ask someone something such like that. The only one that would know about hiring someone to kill was Joey---and I definitely couldn’t ask him for help.
I didn’t know what I was going to do, but I knew that I was going to have to do something…and I was going to have to do it fast!
~***~
“If I run into you one more time, I’m going to swear that you are stalking me,” Joey’s wife Silvia joked.
Aside from her humor, she was right.
We were running into each other quite often lately, which was weird since they lived a town over. But then again, maybe it was because she changed law firms.
“I know; do you live near here?” I asked her, though I already knew the answer.
“Actually, I do. Do you know where Cherry Street is? We moved there just a few months ago.”
What?
You have got to be kidding me!
Cheery Street was only a street over…from my house!
Joey never mentioned that he and his family had moved. And he damn sure hadn’t mentioned that he only lived a street over from me. I guess that explained why I saw him watching our house so often.
Joey was a lunatic!
Chills ran down my spine; and not in a good way.
I had a bad feeling about all of this.
“Uh, yeah, I think I’ve heard of it before,” I said, walking into the doctor’s office, noticing that Silva had entered in behind me.
I handled my business with the front nurse and then I took a seat. Silvia went next.
And of course, she came and sat right beside of me when she was done.
“Expecting?” I asked her bluntly, and out of curiosity.
“Who me? Yeah right, I’m trying to get rid of the two that I have…and their daddy,” she said, and immediately acted as though she wanted to take back what she’d just said.
Okay…what?
The silence between us was awkward, and for a while, neither of us bothered to say a word.
Where is this damn doctor?
“I know who you are,” Silvia said.
I looked at her, to make sur
e that she was talking to me.
She was.
“Excuse me,” I said.
“You don’t have to play dumb with me. I know that you are sleeping with my husband,” Silva said.
Oh my God...how on earth did she know?
And correction…I used to sleep with her husband.
There’s a difference…or is there?
“Is your baby his?” she asked.
I was still at a loss of words so I just shook my head no.
She knew about our affair?
I wonder if she’d told Joey.
“Look, I’ve known for a while. But I don’t care. I don’t want him. I just want to get away from him…and you are going to help me,” she said.
Just as the last word came out of her mouth, the doctor called my name.
She smiled at me and waved goodbye as I walked away.
~***~
“Are you here to see Mr. Gill?”
“No, I’m actually here to see his daughter,” I said to the receptionist.
“And whom might that be?” she asked innocently.
Before I was able say anything more, Silvia approached us.
“Mr. Gill is with someone but I can help you if you’d like?” she said, giving me the eye, and motioned for me to follow her to her office.
“FYI, everyone doesn’t know that I’m his daughter; after all, my mother is his housekeeper---and his mistress. She refuses to quit,” Silvia shrugged.
Humph, that explained a lot. I guess Mr. Gill had lied about being married to her mother. But he was a lawyer…I should have known better.
She continued.
“Look, I knew who you were the very first time you’d approached me in the store. I’m not a stupid woman; I knew that he was having an affair, and after following him a time or two, I knew it was with you. But I could care less. I just want out. Now, I don’t know exactly how you know Joey; but if you know him as well as I think that you do, you know that he has a little issue with folks trying to walk out on him. I’ve been trying to leave him for years; but he won’t let me. Joey will never give me a divorce. Trust me, I’ve tried. I’m a lawyer, it could be done and over with in a heartbeat, but Joey refuses; and if you don’t know this, he is a little on the crazy side. After a while, I just gave up and tried to make it work but Joey doesn’t love me. If I had to guess…he loves you. I’m just a possession. I have some money; but not enough to disappear. I could ask my father, but believe it or not, I can’t stand his lying, cheating ass. Besides, he loves Joey; and I’m sure he would rat me out as soon as Joey started asking questions. Now according to my father’s files, you have enough money to make me disappear…isn’t that right?” Silvia said. Her voice wasn’t as chipper and she sure as hell didn’t seem as friendly. I’d always figured that Joey had been lying about his marriage; but who knew?