I thought about the collision and what had happened. I thought about worlds merging, how most of the supply stores were—fortunately—still intact.
During the move-in, Holly couldn’t stop crying. It was quite the spectacle. She’d stop for a minute and laugh, and then start crying again.
“Gosh,” she exclaimed. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why I’m acting like such a big dumb baby.”
“You’re not a big dumb baby,” I told her.
“But I feel like a big dumb baby,” she said.
Karen started laughing. Mellicent and Jody joined in. Charlie seemed a trifle confused by all the emotion, as if the idea of moving into a new home should create more reason to laugh than to cry. I stood there, soaking it all in, feeling emotional myself, like…well…a big dumb baby.
~
We helped Holly organize the house. Soon, another truck arrived, and we helped unload more supplies. The truck was mainly full of mattresses and clothes. For some bizarre reason, the plumbing had come on recently. Holly’s house, and others along the neighborhood, surprisingly, had hot water. Karen and I never saw anything like it. On Paramis, the water is always cold unless you heat it in a pot over a fire. I stepped into the bathroom, feeling the hot streams against my palm. “Karen,” I said. “Feel this.”
She put her hand in the shower, feeling the streams, and raised her eyebrows. “That is very odd,” she said. “How do you think they do it?”
“Is it magic?” I asked.
“I think it’s called a water heater,” Holly said, smiling. “Do you mind if I take a shower now?”
Embarrassed, we exited the bathroom.
Holly wanted to take advantage of this luxury right away since she hadn’t been able clean herself or the kids since the collision. She took a long hot shower then, coming out smelling of soap, bristling bright and new, and wearing fresh, clean clothes. The kids took turns as well. They were very excited to take a shower. I’d never seen people so enthralled to bathe before. Maybe in time, the refrigerator would hum to life along with the stove and the lights. As it was, once darkness fell, there were enough lights outside from the shifting stars to illuminate not only the neighborhood, but the inside of the house as well. Even though darkness had fallen, it was still bright outside. We did not need candles.
Later, after snacks, and a dinner consisting of peanut butter and banana sandwiches, potato chips, and blackberry soda, Charlie stood up and said, “Hey everybody! Wanna see a magic trick?”
“Magic trick?” I asked, somewhat stunned. I wasn’t aware magic was alive on Earth, at least in the way we understood magic on Paramis.
Charlie nodded eagerly, brown eyes bright and wide. He held a blue handkerchief the color of Karen’s skin. “Ready?” he asked.
“Anticipating every moment,” I said.
Charlie smiled and threw the handkerchief above his head. It fell lazy and slow through the air and over his hand. He pulled the ends of the handkerchief tightly over his fist. Just as quickly, he pulled it away. In his hand was a bundle of startlingly, vivid red roses, and they were not plastic; they were very real. I could smell them.
I looked at him, amazed. My mouth hung open stupidly. I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know what to think. Jody, Holly, and Mellicent, gasped in surprise. Karen clapped as if the act hadn’t surprised her at all.
“These are for you, Karen,” Charlie said, handing her the roses.
Karen was overcome. I saw her take a deep breath. It’s hard to admit, but I was touched.
“Thank you,” she said, her voice thick.
Charlie beamed, turned, and bolted up the stairs, as if embarrassed. We turned and watched his tiny figure disappear out of sight.
Holly stared at the roses in an expression of wonder. “I don’t…I mean,” she tried to say. “I can’t…I mean, I’ve never seen him do that before.”
“That was amazing,” Jody said, with awe in her voice.
“Look, Mom,” Mellicent said. “They’re real.”
Karen leaned in and inhaled the roses. They were not a predictable, plastic substitute most magicians used (at least that’s what Holly had told me). The roses were real, soft, and silky to the touch. I bent to inhale the scent to see for myself.
Magic? I thought. What was going on here? Had Earth always had magic? I’d heard of Harry Houdini, but Charlie’s trick was not a masterful illusion. It had been authentic to the core.
The more I thought about it, the more I realized Charlie did not look like the Charlie I’d encountered a week before. Before he’d performed his trick, I noticed a radiant hue emanating from deep within, as if one of the ‘fallen stars’ had buried itself beneath his flesh. Maybe they weren’t ‘ordinary’ people anymore. Maybe more went on here than even I’d suspected. Maybe the collision had changed everyone in a way we’d never anticipated, never comprehended, or even imagined.
In time, I’d see that miracle for what it truly was.
~
Later that night, at roughly 2:30 in the morning, I awoke on the living room floor (much more comfortable than the hard ground of cave floors).
I opened my eyes, stretched, and sat up, looking out the living room window. One of the stars, roughly the size of a microwave oven, hovered just outside, throwing a silvery blue light into the room.
I heard a sound from upstairs and turned my head. A hitch, a sob, something deep in the throat. Crying, I thought, and stood up, my head almost grazing the ceiling. I made my way up the stairs, holding the banister, making the steps creak.
The sound grew steadily louder, definitely crying, I thought. One of the children, I wondered?
I made it to the top of the stairs, walking slowly down the hallway, cocking my head. I put my ear to the door the sound was coming from.
It was Holly’s room.
I grabbed the knob, knocked lightly to warn her, peeked inside, and winced.
The room was ablaze with light, and I was virtually blinded. A star hovered outside Holly’s bedroom window similar to the one downstairs, only brighter and much larger. I suddenly felt like I was standing on the sun…or only a couple steps away
I looked at Holly, shielding my hand over my eyes, and said her name. She looked up at me, embarrassed. This poor girl had crying a lot lately, and I could only imagine what she must be going through.
“Holly?” I asked. “Are you okay?”
She waved me inside, motioning me to shut the door. I did as she asked and went to the bed, sitting on the edge. Bent in half, I was still taller than she was. I put my hand on the blanket where her knee was, and Holly smiled through her tears. God, what a pretty woman, I thought, probably thirty-five. Without the tears, she looked ten years younger.
“I just saw Carl,” she said.
I didn’t know who Carl was. I’d never asked, and I’d never had the chance. I remembered the night Karen and I met Holly and her kids, and I could figure out who Carl was without asking. The events since the collision had taken no more than a week, and a lot had happened since then.
“I know you miss him,” I said.
She looked at me. Her eyes were big and brown, Charlie’s eyes. She shook her head.
“No,” she said. “Carl. He was here.”
I wasn’t hearing her correctly. I looked at her, unable to comprehend what she meant. I frowned, then began to worry. I was hoping our precious, robust Holly, wasn’t losing her mind.
She looked at me again and tried to smile. Tears fell from her eyes, making wet tracks down her cheeks.
“Carl was here?” I asked.
Holly nodded vigorously. “I woke up,” she explained. “Because that ball of light was just outside the window. It was so bright.” She looked at the ball of silvery blue light, which made her skin look like electric marble. Her eyes were deep and dark, black pools of ink. She turned and looked at me again. “He was standing by the window,” she said. “God, Justin! He was so handsome. He was wearing a dark suit with a white shirt undernea
th. It’s not what he was wearing when he died. Did I ever tell you how handsome he was?”
“I figured you would in time,” I said.
She smiled, reaching out, and grabbed my huge, red hand. She squeezed it, and I squeezed in return.
“He’s tall,” she said. “Well, not by your standards, but tall. Maybe six-four. I don’t even come up to his chin. He has big, dark eyes, like Charlie’s.” I couldn’t help but smile at this because of what I’d just thought. “He was such a gentleman. I remember a few years ago when the kids were younger…I was having one of those days when they’re just being awful, when they’re not listening to anything you say, just having a bad day with them, you know? Well, maybe you don’t know, but…anyway, I was screaming at them, telling them to leave me alone, to go to their rooms for a few minutes and give me some peace. They were just acting so out of character, so…loud.” I could not picture Holly doing this, let alone the children misbehaving. “Carl came home early while I was trying to get supper ready. I was a nervous wreck. He took one look at me. Carl always had a way of reading me. Maybe it wasn’t hard because of the expression on my face. But he knew instantly. All he did was look at me. He smiled. He wrapped his arms around me, giving me this huge hug, holding onto me for the longest time, Justin. When he did, I just cried and cried. I let go of him. I was afraid I was burning the pork chops, so I turned back to the stove. He came over and stood beside me. He nudged me lightly with his hip, just enough to push me out of the way, and said, ‘Move over, buster. I’m taking over this popcorn stand. Your job is to retire to the living room, have a glass of wine, and wait for me to call before you move an inch. That’s an order. Go on now, get!’ I just stood there. I kept crying. I don’t remember. ‘Go on, get moving,’ he said, but I couldn’t move. I stood there crying. I was so stressed out, so frazzled from the kids, I just bawled and bawled. I’m such a bawl baby. I cry at everything. Carl said, ‘Hey, champ, I didn’t mean to tell you what to do. It was just a suggestion to take a load off. Do you need another hug? Just let it out, Holly. Let it out.’ So, I did. He fixed us both a drink, took my hand, and pulled me into the living room. He sat me down. He went upstairs and was gone for a few minutes, talking to the kids. Suddenly, the house was very quiet. He came back downstairs, finished making dinner, set the table, and we all sat down to eat. We had one of the best meals in the house we’d ever had. We all laughed and talked. The kids behaved. I don’t know what he said, but whatever it was, it worked. Whenever Carl was gone, and I was left alone with them, they were so much more behaved, especially when he came home. I mean, kids will be kids, right? They’ll tease each other, but knowing Carl was coming home, they were better…after school…during the summer. And when he did come home, things were different. We were the perfect family…until…” She stared out the window again.
“He sounds like quite a guy, Holly,” I said. “I like him already, and I don’t even know him. You were very lucky to have him. And he was lucky to have you, and you had beautiful children together. That must count for something, right?”
She turned away from the window and looked at me. “He said,” she began, and then stopped for a second before going on. “He said that he would always be here. No matter what. Not before he died, Justin. Just now…when I saw him. He told me you and Karen are very special, and that I was to trust you and listen to everything you say. He came right over to the bed, Justin. He sat right where you’re sitting now. He grabbed my hand. I could smell his aftershave. I could feel the strength of his hands. I could feel how warm he was. God, Justin, it was so real! He leaned over and kissed me on the forehead. He told me it was important for me to be strong, stronger than ever because things were funny now. Things were different and always would be, but it wasn’t over. He told me I had to be strong even for you and Karen…that I had to be strong for the kids. ‘Be strong, most importantly, for you, Holly,’ he said.” She stopped for a second, staring into space, the moment reliving itself before her eyes. I wonder if she could still smell him, feel the warmth of his hand, and surprisingly—whether I believed it or not—I could detect the aroma of aftershave.
Holly continued:
“‘Promise you’ll be strong for yourself, Holly,’ he told me. ‘Promise me, no matter what, that you’ll be strong for you.’ I started crying. I couldn’t help it. ‘I will, Papa,’ I said. I sometimes called him Papa, because he loved Ernest Hemingway and always talked about how he wanted to go to Africa.” Of course, I had no idea what she was talking about, because I had no idea what Africa was or Ernest Hemingway. “‘I promise,’ I told him. ‘I miss you so much.’ He smiled at me. ‘I know,’ he said. ‘I love and miss you, too. But I’m not really gone, and I need you to remember that. It’s important.’ I promised again. I couldn’t stop crying. He patted my hand, stood, and went to the window. The next thing, I knew, he was gone. He just disappeared. He turned to the window and walked right through it, into that ball of light. I just…I…”
She couldn’t go on, and I could see she couldn’t go on. I told her not to worry about it. I told her she didn’t have to say anything else. She looked toward the window again, and I did, too. The stars had a different meaning to me now. I wasn’t sure what to believe or how to respond, but I knew better than to refute what she’d said.
Holly turned back to me. She looked concerned. “Justin,” she said. “Do you think I’m going crazy?”
I smiled, patting her hand. “Hardly,” I said. “I think you’re the farthest thing from crazy, Holly. In fact, I think you’re probably the sanest person I know.”
I tried to absorb all that had happened since the collision. I watched Holly closely. She wasn’t crying now. She looked better. I was glad I had come up to see her. I was glad I’d knocked. I hoped she felt the same.
This was stranger than anything I’d every experienced.
“Do you feel any better?” I asked.
She nodded. “Yes. Thank you, Justin.”
I pulled the covers up under her chin, as if Holly were one of my own. Surprising myself, I leaned over and kissed her forehead. It was cool. “Do you think you can sleep now?” I asked.
She nodded.
“Good,” I said. “And Holly?”
“Yes?”
“I think, no matter what’s going on, or what’s happening, no matter how bad some stuff may seem, some very beautiful things are happening, too. I think it’s important to remember that. We have some good things to look forward to.”
She nodded, and when she smiled, I could tell she was going to be all right.
I went to the door and opened it. I turned and looked at her, at the ball of light hovering outside the window.
“Justin?”
I raised my black eyebrows.
“Thank you,” she said.
I nodded. “I love you, Holly. Get some rest.”
I walked out and closed the door behind me.
I didn’t know why I’d said what I did. It was strange, the most bewildering thing in the world, at least in that moment, but it was the most natural, too.
As I made my way down the hall, I realized I was crying for reasons even I did not understand. For the first time since landing on Earth, I was shedding my first mortal tears.
~
I walked back downstairs into the lighted living room and lied next to Karen. She stirred and moved.
“Where have you been, paramour?” she asked in a sleepy voice. She reached out and put her hand on my thigh.
“Holly had a dream,” I said.
“Nightmare?” she asked.
“Just the opposite.”
“Is she okay?”
“Yes,” I said. “Go to sleep.”
“You first,” she said, nudging closer. She put her arm around my chest.
I stared at the ceiling.
I held onto her and thought about Holly and the kids, Carl, Dilla-dale, Lane, and Tor-Latress, and everything and anything in the world that would keep my mind racing for the
rest of the night.
Sleep did not claim me for a long, long time.
4.
Flowers for Carl and a Belated Gift
The next day, Karen had the children enthralled in the backyard with one of her many tales of Paramis and the Old Ones, reminding me of the day I’d first met her. She had been doing the same thing in Delayne when I happened to walk by, and her power to enchant had stopped me dead in my tracks, but that’s another story…
The search for Lane was still underway. According to the latest news, she was gathering followers up north.
Meanwhile, we bided our time with Holly and the kids. I was in the kitchen with her, helping her make sandwiches for lunch. She seemed more her old self today, well rested, although her eyes were still puffy from crying the night before. I looked to the sliding glass door leading into the backyard. It was a beautiful day. Clouds patched the sky under an intense, windless blue. The grass was thick and green.
“Thank you again for last night, Justin,” Holly said.
I shrugged. “Hey, man, it was nothing,” I said, adopting Charlie’s vernacular.
An awkward moment passed between us, and I thought it best to change the subject. “How long has Charlie been into magic?” I asked.
Holly smiled and looked outside toward her boy. She was wearing a dark green sweater with buttons down the front, a white shirt underneath. Her hair was in a ponytail.
“A few years,” she said. “We rented a documentary about magicians one night. It was David Copperfield he liked best. He was hooked from that moment on.”
“David Copperfield?”
“A magician. Very popular. Not so much anymore. I remember I saw him on television when I was a kid. He made the Statue of Liberty disappear.”
When We Were Dragons Page 5