I’d laughed internally. Was that his best chat up line?
‘I thought they were aeroplanes,’ I said, attempting to be funny.
He burst out laughing. ‘Please tell me you’re joking?’ he asked, his forehead creased in worry.
I burst out laughing too. ‘Of course I’m joking.’
I tried to collect myself, watching as a smile curved the corners of his mouth. Moonlight shimmered across his skin, highlighting him in an almost ethereal glow. His eyes locked deeply with mine, a meaningful gleam in them. My heart pounded loud in my ears. Was he going to kiss me?
I wanted so badly to close the little distance between us, to reach out and touch his lips, but the potential rejection stopped me. He reached out and wrapped a loose tendril of my hair around his thumb. My heart spluttered hyperactively. Oh Jesus, that felt like heaven!
He rested his thumb under my chin, cupping my cheek with his palm. I made a strange kind of squeaky noise. My body’s way of physically swooning. Please touch me, I begged him psychically.
He pulled my face slowly towards him, his face lowering. I couldn’t remember how to breathe. He was going to kiss me and I was going to pass out from deprivation of oxygen.
I closed my eyes, unable to bear being so close to him. Please kiss me. And then his lips were on mine. His warm, plump lips warming up my cold ones. I kissed him back as best I could, but it’s hard when you’re still in shock. He kissed the corner of my mouth then continued to leave a trail of kisses up to my ear and then back again. Jesus, he was smooth.
And just like that I was in love.
‘Watch!’ a Spanish man shouts, pulling me back into the present. I watch as he runs over the fire embers. His face is a picture. This doesn’t look so much an act, more a form of torture. The things they’ll do to try and please the tourists.
‘Woo!’ I shout along with the crowd, cheering them on.
‘She likes it,’ the man says pointing at me with a chuckle, his beer belly jumping up and down. Before I can register what’s happening he’s picking me up and holding me upside down, my head so close to the burning embers that I feel the heat on my face.
‘Aaarrgh! Put me down, put me down!’ I yelp, closing my eyes in terror.
The crowd is laughing. Yeah, yeah, it’s bloody hysterical when someone gets attacked by a random Spanish man. My stomach lurches violently. I’ve never been good upside down. I once went on a rollercoaster that did it and I ended up spewing so bad I covered several people in it. What a way to ruin my eighth birthday party.
‘Get off her!’ someone roars from behind me. New arms are around my stomach and my view spins round again. I shake my head to try and refocus myself. I’m looking into Jack’s face. He saved me.
‘Are you okay?’ he asks, concern evident in his eyes as he scans over my body.
‘Err..yeah.’ Is it weird that I suddenly feel on the edge of bursting into tears? It must be the shock.
‘Come on.’ He guides me over to the bus, his arm around my waist. I drag in an unsteady breath at the feel of his hand on me.
I can’t help but think that this is a very boyfriend thing to do. When in reality I’ve just dumped my boyfriend at home by email. God, I’m a whore.
We get on the bus and head for the back row. Two seats seem to be missing but we still fit Alice and Charlie with us by the windows seats. Alice gets our bottles filled with wine out and hands mine to me.
‘Thanks, but I think I’m already a bit too drunk,’ I admit, not meeting Jack’s eyes. Definitely far too drunk as I’m imagining licking him from head to toe. And I don’t even like toes!
‘Suit yourself,’ she laughs, already opening hers and taking a few glugs.
The bus starts abruptly, flinging us all back in our seats.
‘Jesus!’ Charlie chuckles. ‘This driver’s had more wine than Erica.’
‘Hey!’ I slur. Shit, he’s right.
We swing round a corner, my chair sliding me all the way to the window.
‘Shit!’
Everyone bursts out laughing as I swing back as he takes an opposite corner.
‘What the hell is with this bus?’ I laugh so hard I snort, which just makes everyone laugh all the more hysterically.
The next corner is even more severe, I slide away and then back with such force my head plants itself into Jack’s lap. I’m mortified!
‘Ooh, cheeky!’ Jack chuckles, helping me up. Tom looks back at us and starts wolf-whistling.
‘Shit, sorry,’ I apologise, cheeks reddening as I remove myself from his groin area. I look away from his face, trying to find words. ‘This chair is a nightmare.’
‘It’s fine,’ he says, offering me his hand.
I take it, not sure where he’s leading me but find it’s to sit on his lap. Well I can’t refuse now, can I? I mean, my chair is broken.
‘Damn it, Alice, give me that wine,’ I demand.
‘I told you,’ she laughs, handing it over.
I open the lid and start downing it. My stomach is a knotted ball of worry. Every time the bus goes round another corner I’m clinging onto Jack’s chest, drinking my wine until it’s all gone.
‘I swear, I’m going to die on this bus,’ I cry, my skin so clammy I’m worried I’m leaving sweat prints on Jack’s t-shirt.
He laughs, locking his hazel eyes with mine. ‘Do you really think I’d ever let anything happen to you?’ His eyes are glinting as if joking, but I know it’s just a front. Underneath they’re more serious than I’ve ever seen them.
But the truth remains that I don’t really know him anymore. Maybe he’ll hurt me again. I don’t know anything about this grown up version of Jack. Plus, I’m far too pissed right now to even attempt to dissect it.
‘Just rest your head back and try to sleep.’ He cups the side of my head and pulls it into his chest. The skin on his hand is silky smooth, no sign of calluses. It makes me wonder what he does for a living. Definitely not a physical job. I wish I hadn’t made that stupid rule of skipping all of that info.
I let myself wonder as I sag against him. He wraps his arms around me. A hopeful pain in my chest sprouts, attempting to grow. I squash it back down, determined not to let feelings grow for him. It’s hard when his warming citrusy scent soothes my frayed nerves as if he were made to keep me calm.
I let his heartbeat calm me and before long I find myself drifting, him taking all my worries away from me. But still the same thought in my head threatens to ruin it. Can I trust him?
Chapter Eight
Erica
Saturday
I wake up in my bed and more importantly I’m alone. I vaguely remember being carried here by Jack, and Brooke cracking some kind of crude joke about him not taking advantage of me while I’m comatose. Shit, I feel hungover. My mouth is as dry as a nun’s vagina and my head throbs with the threat of a migraine.
‘Come on, sleepy muffin,’ Brooke sings, already tying up her bikini. ‘It’s the water park today.’
‘Ugh, I totally forgot about that.’
I’m really not sure how I’m going to cope with throwing myself down water slides when my stomach’s this unsettled. The way it’s going I could be making my own water slide in the toilet soon enough.
‘Come on,’ Brooke insists with an eye roll. ‘A fry up will sort you right out.’
‘No.’ I shake my head. ‘I’m not going anywhere and you can’t make me.’
Jack
We’re sat in the breakfast buffet stuffing our faces with waffles and bacon when Nicholas and Charlie start nodding to each other, as if they’re communicating without words. What the fuck is going on?
‘Alright, out with it,’ I demand, putting down my fork.
Charlie’s eyes widen and look to Nicholas.
Nicholas starts chewing on his lip. ‘We just think…’ he fidgets with his phone.
‘They think you should leave twiglet alone,’ Tom interrupts. At least he doesn’t try and sugar coat crap.
B
ut leave her alone? Why the hell would I leave her alone?
‘Why?’
Charlie sighs. ‘Look, it’s not that we think you should leave her alone. It’s just that we don’t think you should lead her on if you’re not going to offer her anything after this holiday.’
Fuck. When the hell did they get so sensitive to women’s feelings?
‘I’m not leading her on. And for all you know she might just want a holiday fling.’ I know that’s a lie, but I’m clutching at straws here.
Nicholas rolls his eyes. ‘Something tells me Erica’s not the love them and leave them kind.’
I bloody know that too.
‘I mean,’ Charlie begins, grimacing, ‘we’re assuming that you haven’t told her about Esme? Or Amber?’
I put my head in my hands. Shit. I know they’re right. There’s no way we can carry this on in real life. Am I really being a dick and giving her false hope?
‘No,’ I admit. ‘I just…fuck, I can’t leave her alone. Having her here at the same time as us. It’s just like fate is fucking with me.’
‘Hey, we know what you’re saying,’ Nicholas nods with a frown. ‘But if you don’t want to tell her the truth, then cut her loose. Don’t give her false hope.’
I nod in agreement. It’s just a shame that it fucking sucks so hard.
Erica
It seems she can make me. Anything to stop her whining. Most annoying of all, she was right. All of that grease has some sort of magic power. Not that I feel great right now, but it’s a start.
By the time we’re loading onto the musty bus I’m feeling human again and I’m even a little excited. Especially to be seeing Jack again. Whenever I think of Jack’s arms wrapped around me last night I can’t help but glow with happiness.
Now that things are over with Karl I feel like I can concentrate on the possibility of me and Jack. I still can’t believe we kissed last night. Not that I’m living in a dream world. I have to remind myself that he’s probably a player nowadays so I have to make sure to protect myself.
He walks onto the bus with Charlie. I smile up at him, sure he’s going to take the empty seat in front of me. My stomach drops when he smiles tightly and instead chooses a seat closer to the driver. What the hell is that all about? Did I do something when I was drunk to piss him off?
Maybe’s he’s just a bastard and I’ve been wrong the whole time. Maybe he’s moved his sights onto someone else.
As if on cue his phone dings and I watch him as he reads it, his face lighting up with a huge grin. He elbows Charlie and beckons for him to read it. Charlie starts laughing. ‘She is so hilarious!’ he laughs. Jack can’t stop smiling. Who the hell is this whore that’s making him laugh so much? What has she got that I haven’t?
I cross my arms and turn to look out of the window as we leave the white sandy beach, and ocean, heading slightly more inland. Not that it’s built up, but we pass what looks like a farmer’s market, which seems quite hip for Luna Island. Then we’re on a long carriageway, the blue sky the only prettiness to focus on.
I mean, do I have daddy issues or something? Why have I dumped a perfectly good boyfriend back home for this tool who insists on treating me badly? Maybe my mum’s right and I should book in for some therapy when I get back. She keeps telling me I haven’t gotten over the diagnosis of her cancer. I myself don’t know what there is to get over. All I wanted to know was what treatment she needed to get better.
We make it to the water park in no time. It’s far closer to the hotel than I’d thought. Us girls head to the floating ringed area while the boys go straight to the biggest and scariest chutes they can find. I’m glad. I need some time away from Jack.
We’ve only been floating around for a little while when I notice people staring at me, pointing and laughing. What the hell are they sniggering at?
‘Hey, Molly, why is everyone staring at me?’
She lifts her sunglasses up, perplexed, and scans over my body. Her eyebrows hit her hairline in horror. Oh my God, what is it? Have I got a lizard on me or something? She seems to be wavering, as if torn whether she should tell me.
I follow her eye line down to my breasts, wondering if one’s popped out. Even worse, my white bikini has gone completely see-through! Shit! You can see my ruby red nipples!
‘Shit!’ I quickly cover myself the best I can with my hands.
Alice spots it and bursts out laughing, alerting the others. Yeah, great. That’s the last time I buy anything from one of those Facebook boutiques. Cheap as shit material.
Wait a second. If my top is see through...I look down at my crotch. Oh, my ever-loving God! My bikini bottoms are see-through too! You can see my dark pubic hair! Fuck my life!!
I can feel my face turning scarlet. I quickly try to cover myself down there with the palm of my hand, attempting to cling onto some dignity. At least I’m trimmed and neat, rather than my lazy girl bush I normally sport. I cannot believe I am on this ring completely naked. It literally can’t get any worse for me.
‘Hey twiglet, why you hiding yourself?’ Tom shouts over from the side of the pool.
I was wrong; it can get worse. And it just has.
I lift one hand to wave him away, but in doing so accidently flash my boobs. Oh fuck! I quickly cover myself back up, every nerve ending in my body screaming in mortification.
‘Woah, twiglet! I knew you had a good rack, but fuck if my dick isn’t a little hard right now.’ He chuckles, loving my discomfort. Sadistic bastard.
I blush crimson, paranoia sweeping over me. How much of them did he see? Shit the bed, I would pay some serious money to be anywhere but here right now.
Jack walks up behind him. ‘What are you talking about?’
Tom chuckles, pointing towards me. ‘Your girl’s got her tits out.’
His girl? How embarrassing! I am so not his girl. He didn’t even want to smile at me earlier.
His eyes widen in horror, even though I have myself covered. I quickly jump off the hoop, hoping the water camouflages me somewhat. I swim to the edge and press my backside against the wall, covering myself with my hands as best I can.
He walks over, an amused grin on his face. ‘Here,’ he offers, holding out a towel. ‘You can cover yourself with this while you dry off.’
I snort. ‘You’re assuming I’m willing to get out of the pool at all.’
And what’s with the suddenly being nice to me again? He is one confusing bastard. Plus everyone is clearly whispering about me. Some mothers are even shielding their children’s faces away from me. I roll my eyes. They’ll be the same mothers breastfeeding their four year olds later, no doubt.
‘Oh, come on. It’s nothing I haven’t seen before.’ He winks cheekily.
I didn’t think it was possible for your cheeks to combust into actual fire, but from the burning sensation I’d say that’s exactly what’s just happened.
‘Well, things have changed since then. And anyway, I don’t want the whole water park to see me naked.’ Especially not Tom, who’s still hovering close by, no doubt waiting for me to exit and flash a tit again.
He titters, clutching onto his stomach. ‘Come on. I’ll cover you as best I can.’ He offers his hand again.
I look at it, considering my very limited options. The girls have hardly run off to get a towel. They seem far too interested in getting a tan. I begrudgingly take it, realising I’m going to have to get out at some time.
‘Wait, what about Tom?’ I look over and he’s still gawking, clearly looking forward to seeing me in all my glory.
Jack turns towards him, puffing out his chest. ‘Tom, so help me God, turn the fuck around!’ Wow, what’s made him so angry? He shouldn’t be acting in the tiniest bit protective of me. He’s showed today with his bipolar behaviour that I don’t mean much to him.
Tom chortles, but turns, as do Charlie and Nicholas. I take Jack’s hand and jump out of the pool, quickly covering myself with the towel. Well, this is humiliating.
�
��Come on.’ He guides me with a hand on my waist towards a small tiki bar made from bamboo and straw. Every time he touches me it’s as if he sends a trail of tingles up and down my body. It practically hums to be touched more.
‘Do you serve any alcohol?’ I blurt out before the guy behind the bar even opens his mouth.
‘Yes,’ he nods with a smile. ‘We do sangria.’
‘Then two sangria’s,’ Jack says with a friendly smile.
‘Each,’ I add quickly. ‘I need to get a little drunk,’ I explain to Jack. Hair of the dog and all that.
We get our drinks and sit down on a small bench. The minute I’ve downed the first one I turn to him, suddenly needing to know if he’s seeing anyone. All of this guessing is doing my head in.
‘So, the guys said you don’t have a girlfriend?’
He stares at me aghast, his head whipping up in interest. ‘Did they? Were you asking questions about me?’ He jibes me lightly in the ribs. ‘Ah, I didn’t know you cared.’
‘No!’ I shriek quickly. Too quickly. God, why did I even bring it up? Now he knows I’ve been obsessing over him. ‘It’s just, well, I don’t even know how or why, but they said it.’ I’m a bumbling fool! Get it together Erica.
‘No, I don’t have a girlfriend,’ he confirms with a shy smile. I wish he’d stop it with the shy smile. It’s his secret weapon. The minute he pulls it out I’m putty in his hands.
I shake my head, desperate to clear it from the images of us frolicking on the beach together, sand getting in unmentionable places.
‘Why was a girl called Amber calling you then?’
Shut the front door, did that really just leave my mouth? Am I really directly asking him about Amber? I could kill myself right now.
He shrugs. ‘She’s just a friend.’
‘Is she...’ I really can’t stop myself. It must be the drink. It must have topped up last nights and now I’m drunk as fuck. ‘Is she the same Amber from when we were younger?’
He raises his eyebrows. ‘You remember her?’
Of course I remember her. The Amber who used to constantly answer his phone when I called him, telling me he was off in a field somewhere. She always made out he was off getting up to no good. It was clear to me she fancied the pants off him. I mean, who wouldn’t? She was obviously trying to scare me off.
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